He walks in our office with a smile.
"What's up?" I ask and he shrugs nonchalant. I roll my eyes. There clearly is something, but he wants to tease me. "Do you want me to guess?" I ask and he nods, grinning.
"You saved a life?" I ask and he shakes his head.
"You did something from your bucketlist?" No.
"You got a girlfriend?" He shakes his head, gazing to the wall.
"You ate a massive ice cream?" He chuckles, but shakes his head again.
"You got your pay check?" No again.
"You met a new friend?" Again no.
"Tell me!" I beg and he shakes his head again. "There's no fun in that." he chuckles. I think about all the things that could have happened. No, I already mentioned those. I guess I'll just start guessing impossible things.
"You saw Julia Roberts?" Nope.
"You made a quick stop at the moon?" He chuckles again. That's clearly a no.
"You won with the lottery?" No.
"You won a special prize?" I expect a no, but he smiles broadly and nods. "What?!" I yell. He nods again. Then he gives me the newspaper.
"Oh my god."
My eyes widen when I see the front page. Young doctor wins Nobel prize!
He grins. "It's not that special." he teases. "Hell yes it is! You won a NOBEL PRIZE!" I yell, jumping. He chuckles. "Yea, it's pretty exciting." he grins. "PRETTY EXCITING?! COME ON, SHOW YOUR FEELINGS!" I yell.
He seems to doubt. "You don't want me to show my feelings." he says, then walks away. What? What does he mean by that? Does he hate me? Is he just pretending to like me?
I swallow my tears and go on with my work. It doesn't matter. But it does. It really does. Because I love him, but he hates me. I really feel like he hates me. Then why did he apologize? He doesn't hate me. No. I don't think he hates me. What I do know, is that I'm going crazy because of him. All these doubts, all these doubts...
No. He doesn't hate me. That's not possible after yesterday. But what does he mean then? I shake my head and try to focus on my work.
*********
After an hour trying to concentrate and failing in it, I sigh and close the maps. I look up, to see Stan watching me, grinning. I frown questionably, but he shakes his head laughing. He walks to my desk and leans on it. He stares in my eyes.
"So, tell me. Do you still want me to show my feelings?" he asks and I nod. He can yell at me, so I know what's wrong. He inhales deeply and pinches the bridge of his nose.
Then, something I didn't expect happens.
"Ow, sorry to interrupt you! But... you won a Nobel prize!" Nell shouts enthusiastically. Stan sigh frustrated. "I know, Nell. It's no big deal." Then he walks over to her and whispers something in her ear. I hear the words 'prize' and 'planning', but that's it. Her eyes widen, she nods and then leaves. He closes the door.
"So. Are you really sure?" he asks again and I nod. I really wanna know now. "You're gonna be mad at me." he says, leaning on my desk again. I shrug. "No, I won't." I promise him.
He shakes his head and goes a few steps backwards. "No, I'm not going to show them. Why don't you take a day off and do something with Max?" he suggest, but his fake smile tells me something else.
"And what if Max and I broke up yesterday?" I ask, placing my head on my hand, looking up at him. He gasps, but then tries to cover it as a cough. "You... broke up?" he asks surprised. I nod and he shakes his head in disbelief. "But... you were marrying him next week?"
I roll my eyes. "I know. And I would like it if you can shut up now about it, because the fact he cheated on me isn't my favorite subject to talk about." I say and he nods.
"But... Then, I guess... I can show them?" I nod again and he bends towards me, his eyes flickering between my eyes and lips. "Oh, just kiss me, dumbass." I smile and he chuckles.
Then, his lips meets mine and I feel the passion between us. It's new, but it feels the same in a way. He places small kisses on my lips and I love it.
I let go of him and he steps back. His expression changes from happiness to worry, and then he looks down. "Shit. Sorry, I... I'm sorry." he stutters. I giggle. "Come here." He looks confused, but obeys me. Leaning on my desk again, he looks at me.
I shake my head and sit down on my desk. He blinks a few times, then walks around my desk and stands in front of me now. I smile and he relaxes a bit. "This is easier to kiss." I grin and now he smiles. "So, are you gonna kiss me or?" I giggle and he shakes his head, laughing.
Then, he kisses me again and cups my face in his hands. The kiss starts slow, but it gets faster and more passionate. His hands go from my face to my shoulders to my thighs and back to my face. My hands are under his shirt, on his -still breathtaking- sixpack.
He gasps in my mouth when I tug his hair. Panting, he moves his mouth a few inches away from mine. He looks in my eyes, and all I see is... love? "I missed you so much." he says. He stares intense. Really intense.
Maybe this is a good moment to show -or tell- my feelings. "And I still love you." I smile. His eyes widen so much I think they'll fall out of his head and he takes a few steps back. Almost in shock, he stares at me. I start panicking. Maybe he doesn't want me back, but just wanted to know what he missed?
"What?" he asks and I shake my head. "Nothing." I mumble. His hands go trough his hair and he looks shocked. "You said you still loved me. Is that true? Do you still love me?" he asks and I nod a bit. I look down, at my feet.
"It's been four years, Nora. You were engaged to Max. And still, you love me?" he asks and I nod again, feeling caught. He exhales sharply and shakes his head again. But then, he smiles and a flood of relief hits me.
"Well, since we're making confessions: I still sleep with Flash." My eyes widen and he smiles embarrassed. "Yeah. But, after four years, it doesn't really smell like you anymore." he sighs. I smile. "Well, give it to me for tonight. I'll make it smell like me again." I say and he nods, but looks troubled.
"What's wrong?" I ask and he shrugs. "Just... I don't know how I should act around you. What are we now? Do you want to go slow, or...?" He uncomfortably stares at the ground and I smile again. A big, in-love-smile.
"What do you want?" I ask and he shakes his head. "That's not fair. I hurt you too much to ask for things I want. I would be happy if you could look at me without hating me." he says, his voice is in pain. "I don't hate you." I frown. "And it's not because you hurt me that this relationship is all about me."
His head snaps up and he looks at me with a jaw dropped to the floor. "You... You still want... a relationship?" he stutters, looking surprised. "Of course I do." I frown and take him in my arms.
He hugs me tightly and lets out a deep sigh. Then, he looks up at me again. "What do you want?" he asks and I smile. "I want things to be just like previously. But without Italy, then." I warn and he nods. "I want that too. How do you wanna start?" he asks.
"I would say, stop acting like you didn't cry every single night for over a year and just tell her you love her." Nell says and I gasp, turning around. "What... How... I closed the door?" Stan asks confused. "I'm the underboss, I have all the keys." she says, laughing.
"So, are you gonna say it to her or do I have to?" she asks, one eyebrow raised. "Uh.. yeah. Later." he mumbles. Then he wraps his arms around me and lays his head down on my chest. I rest my head on his head and close my eyes.
"Good. Now you're back together, I can finally tell all my secrets!" she says enthusiastic, coming in and closing the door behind her again. "So, Nora, Stan's never gone to Italy, but he didn't have the courage to call you. He went to an university her in Belgium, and changed five times to check where you were. He didn't found you and lost you. He has been crying every single night for a whole year and never stopped loving you." she explains, and Stan looks away.
"Thank you for exposing me like that." he grumbles, then puts his head back on my lap. My fingers go trough his hair and his eyelids flutter closed.
"Stan, Nora never stopped loving you either. She didn't even love Max. And I was planning some giant scene where you tell your feelings for her on the wedding day, and then you two would run off, but you ruined my plans. Not that I mind, though. And, before she went living together with Max, your picture of prom was on her nightstand." she smirks and Stan looks up at me, still laying on my lap.
"And thank you for telling all this." I groan and I give Stan a small kiss. He smiles. "You're welcome. Now, Alec has been waiting outside the whole time. Can I let him in now?" she asks and walks over to the door. Alec comes in and waves to us all. Then he sees Stan head on my lap and he smiles.
"Ugh, finally! It wasn't much fun at home anymore. Always depressed!" he sighs teasingly. Stan growls and shakes his head. "Wait. You live with Alec and Nell?" I ask and he nods. "Yeah. I just couldn't live alone. Since Flash doesn't work anymore, I have nightmares every night and if I live in my own, they would never stop." he explains.
"Then, maybe, we should get a place on our own." I say. He jumps up, his eyes wide. He raises his hand. "Wait. I can't follow you. Yesterday you hated me, today we kiss for the first time in four years and you want to live together?" he asks and I shrug. "I mean, I love you, you love me, we know each other for over four years. And if I stay every night with you, we also could get our own place. Besides, they'll have a baby. Then they'll be with three. A baby is a lot of work." I say and he hesitantly nods.
"I just don't want to do anything too fast. What if I hurt you again? Not that I want to hurt you, but just... I don't know." he mutters. I shrug and smile. "You won't hurt me again, Stan. I believe that you love me, that's enough for me." I say, inviting him in my arms again.
He doesn't say anything for a while, but I see that he's thinking. "Okay. Okay." he nods suddenly. He stares in my eyes. "What you say, makes sense. Let's go find a place." he says.
I smile.