CASSIEN
TERROR SOMEWHAT made a way in to sink in my chest. I couldn't deny the fact that I feared the clown, lalo na no'ng kumaway ito sa camera at ngumiti pa. He was a normal clown with his colorful costume, red hair, red lips and red nose whose skin was as white as snow. Candidate number 1 para sa gaganap na Snow White sa Halloween.
From what I observed from the footage, he was gaining most people's attention. I mean, sino ba namang hindi mapapalingon? Such scenery only happens once in a while — or maybe never at all.
"Do we have a lead?" tanong ni Conan habang nakakrus ang dalawang braso.
Nang matapos kami sa Operation: Trespass a Toy Store — 'pag nahuli, ako lang ang dawit, hinatid niya ako sa bahay bandang mga alas-tres nang madaling araw. Thank goodness hindi pa gising si Mama nang ganoong oras kundi patay talaga ako. Simula no'n, hindi na rin ako nakatulog. I don't want that terrfying clown-face in my dreams!
Nai-imagine ko tuloy si Pennywise!
Silence. Nobody dared to respond to Conan's inquiry. Either ayaw nilang sumagot or hindi nila alam ang isasagot. Nasa clubroom kasi kami ngayon para pag-usapan ang nadiskubre namin. Ranpo was sitting on his swivel chair behind the table and slowly pivoting himself. Not to mention that his eyes were closed so he seemed out of the world. Meanwhile, Newt was working on the arrangement of books to a shelf next to the table.
Umagang-umaga bago mag-start ang classes, ito agad ang inaalmusal namin. Ang sarap~
Ang sarap ibaon no'ng salarin para matapos na. Baka kasi mapaihi pa ako sa takot sa clown na 'yon.
Wait, wasn't I the one who asked for adventures?
Parang naririnig ko tuloy si Lady Fate na nagsasabing: "Ngayong binigyan kita, rereklamo ka? E, kung tuluyan na lang kaya kita para wala nang problema?"
I pressed my hands together and closed my eyes. Joke lang po, Lady Fate!
"Teka." It took me a couple of seconds before I gained the courage to break the silence. "Paano tayo nakasisiguro na may kinalaman nga 'tong clown na 'to sa case ni Ava? What if napadaan lang talaga siya at gustong magpapansin sa camera?"
Napatingin sina Conan at Newt kay Ranpo dahil sa sinabi ko. They were probably waiting for an answer since the beginning as well. It was all Ranpo's idea anyway — na may makikita raw kaming kakaiba sa isa sa mga footages. Then, ka-boom! Ayon, may clown nga.
"Ranpo," tawag ni Newt sa kanya dahil mukhang hindi niya ako narinig. Nang-iinis talaga siya, huh.
Agad siya napamulat ng mata nang tawagin ang pangalan niya. He stopped pivoting and looked at Conan, then at Newt — lastly, at me. "Sorry — if it still ain't obvious to you, I wasn't listening. What were you talking about?"
"You know something you still aren't telling us. How did the awful clown became our initial dark dragon?"
I looked confusedly at Newt. Dark dragon? Pinagsasabi nito? Saan bang dimension siya nanggaling?
"Oh, about that—" Yumuko si Ranpo at binuksan ang drawer ng lamesa sa ilalim. He then lifted what he got and tossed the item over the table. "I had a hundred suspects in my head but this was the inference to the best explanation."
"Newspaper?" nagtataka kong tanong nang makita ang item na kinuha niya. I didn't know na uso pa pala 'yang mga dyaryo hanggang ngayon. Madalas kasi ay sa TV at social media na nakakakalap ng mga balita.
"No, Cass. Maybe it wasn't a newspaper. Maybe it was a plastic with abundant words printed on it."
Inirap ko nalang ang mga mata ko dahil sa pamimilosopo niya. Pasalamat siya, wala ako sa mood makipagtalo otherwise he'd have a one-way ticket to hell.
"I was about to do some background checks. Glad I didn't have to waste energy," wika ni Newt at lumapit sa lamesa upang tingnan ang dyaryo. I also came close to look over his shoulder as he carefully flips the pages.
"Two years ago?"
Halos mapatalon na ako sa gulat nang marinig ang boses ni Conan sa gilid ko. He was so close that his voice startled me! When he was peeping over my shoulder, our intact attention was caught by a photograph of a girl who wore the same uniform for Reagan Academy. Sa katabing bahagi nito ay ang pamagat ng balita: Isang Dalagang Nasawi Sa Sunog.
Conan read it aloud for us. "Isang dalagang nagngangalang Jillian Aragona ang binawian ng buhay dulot ng sunog sa kanyang unit sa isang apartment sa Tulip St. Ayon sa imbestigasyon, nagsimula ang sunog sa naiwang bukas na kalan sa kusina na hindi nila — siya at ng mga kaibigan niya — napansin. Ang sabi ng isang kaibigan ay nagse-celebrate lang sila ng birthday ng biktima sa pamamagitan ng pagbibihis bilang clown kaya nila nila namalayan ang aksidenteng paparating."
My chest suddenly felt heavy after knowing the story. I've heard multiple tragedies with the same course of event and my sympathy never changed. I bet Jilliam didn't deserve to meet such demise. Lalo na't sa araw pa ng kanyang birthday nangyari.
It left a mere but meaningful lesson for me: Live your life to the fullest until you've got no regrets. Who knows if you wouldn't seeing the sunshine tomorrow again?
"Jillian Aragona . . ." Newt muttered. He then ascended his gaze to meet Ranpo's. "If I'm not mistaken, our sleeping angel was a friend of this poor victim 2 years ago. She must be one of the clowns who came to Tulip."
"Exactly."
"Somebody must be blaming Ava for the accident?" Conan asked. "Kung gayon, sino pa ba 'yung ibang kasama ni Jillian noong birthday niya? May possibility na isa sa kanila ang tuma-target kay Ava. Too bad, hindi pa siya nagiging para maitanong natin."
"I've worked on that, too — oh, scratch that. I had someone to do it for me and look upon the matter. Haplessly, he hasn't identified them for the records are lacking. Meanwhile the police force was too busy to pay attention to my simple request," paliwanag ni Ranpo at marahang pinaikot-ikot uli ang swivel chair kung saan pa rin siya nakaupo.
"If the law can do nothing we must take the risk ourselves, Sherlock Holmes said in The Tiger of San Pedro. The quote was rather inspiring," sabi ni Newt. He smiled playfully and took his hanging black overcoat and wore it confidently. "We all saw that the clown didn't bring a klunk thing through that technological eye. He must dropped the murder weapon before he reached the stores or hid it in plain sight."
Excited namang sinuot ni Conan ang kanyang blazer at nagtungo sa pinto. "Now this is what I liked."
Aalis agad sila?
"Princess," tawag ni Newt sa 'kin kaya natuon ako sa kanya. "Maybe you could extract some refreshing juices from your friend, the Ice Woman. Babysit Ran— I mean, take Ranpo with you. He's best at—"
"I never needed a babysitter, delusional shuck-face." Ranpo stopped pivoting and glared at Newt; when the latter smiled genuinely, I got the feeling that they have a satisfying friendship.
Sana gano'n din katibay ang friendship namin ni Maisie.
Wait, ano raw? Extract juices from Ice Woman, my friend? He probably called her that way dahil ang cold nito. Pero as far as I learned from Science, wala namang juices sa katawan ng tao. Nakikinig naman ako minsan sa klase, e. Maliban nalang siguro kung timplahan ang 60 percent na tubig sa katawan natin? Jusme! Ang hirap maging bobo.
I couldn't help but to slap my own forehead. How could I be that stupid? At saka, I need myself that I'm worthy of being in this club kundi iki-kick ako ng Ranpo na 'to. Extract juices probably mean extract information. It's that simple, Cassien.
Grr, kagigil, a. Bakit kasi ibang-iba magsalita 'tong si Newt? Too extraordinary!
Our two co-members was about to take their departure when I recollected something.
"Conan! Magkikita naman kayo ni Maisie sa klase niyo, what if ikaw na lang kaya ang magtanong sa kanya?"
May katuwiran din naman ako, e. 'Di ba? Okay, aaminin ko na s-in-uggest ko lang 'yon dahil ayokong tanungin si Maisie about the matter. For sure, she'd be curious, asking questions and I'm afraid that my tongue mught slip and divulge that I was a detective club member!
Minsan, wala pa mamang preno ang bibig ko.
"Hahanapin namin ang murder weapon sa Crocus St. Ibig-sabihin, hindi kami a-attend ng klase," tugon niya. "Hindi kami magkikita."
What?
Then they took off, leaving me bewildered. Seryoso? Hindi sila papasok?!
"Let them be, Cass. They don't need school to learn things. Though they might receive failing marks, it won't affect anything," panimula ni Ranpo nang pag-uusap nang kaming dalawa na lang ang naiwan dito.
"Ang sarap mo palang maging kaibigan, 'no?" sarkastiko kong tanong at pilit na ngumiti. "Kinukunsinti mo 'yung ginagawa nila."
He smiled bitterly — which I found very perplexing — and said, "That's the main account as to why I don't have many friends. The classes are about to start for a few minutes. What are you waiting for? Had they infected you kaya ayaw mo na ring um-attend sa klase? Ang bilis, a."
"Ako kaya dapat ang nagtatanong niyan sa 'yo. Hinihintay lang naman kita kasi nag-aalala ako na baka iba nanamang classroom ang pasukin mo," sabi ko at tumawa with matching palo pa sa lamesa.
Hindi ko kasi makalimutan 'yung hitsura niya no'ng pulang-pula 'yung mukha niya sa kahihiyan! HAHAHA!
Pero teka, parang ayaw ko na rin atang umalis dito, a. What's holding me back?
Hmm. Maybe 'yung air-con? Mas masarap kasi 'yung hangin dito kaysa roon sa room.
"Meh."
*
Stretching my arms was my typical hobby whenever our last period was dismissed. Buti nalang hiwa-hiwalay ang armchairs namin maya hindi sila natatamaan ng maganda kong kamay. Maganda raw, o. Yabang! Kasi otherwise, I'd be the worst seatmate ever.
"Bakit ka nagko-crossdress?" tanong ng kaklase kong baba na nakaupo sa harapan ko. "Ano'ng trip mo?"
"Wala lang, hehe." Napakamot pa ako ng batok at awkward na ngumiti. Sa tingin ko, curious lang siya at hindi naman ako hinahamak.
"Don't you read the rules? Sabi ro'n wear a proper uniform."
I looked at myself from chest to toe. "Aren't I wearing a proper uniform? Wala namang sinabi na if you're a girl, then must wear a feminine uniform, 'di ba?"
Pabiro niyang inirap ang mata niya at napatawa. "Right. Sige, ikaw na bahala kapag nadawit ako, a. President kasi minsan ang nasisisi, e. Anyways, bagay naman sa 'yo 'yung pantalon at hairstyle. I think wala namang makakapansing babae ka talaga."
"T-Thank you po," sagot ko. Grabe, I do really feel guilty of forgetting that she was our class president! Gano'n ba ba ako kalutang?
"Honestly, right now, I'm amazed. Lalo na sa boses mo. How do you do that?" tanong niya, not brushing the smile off her face.
"How do I do — what?" pag-uulit mo naman. Sorry, I'm in my lutang phase at the moment. Or baka sadyang slow lang ako?
"I mean, normal lang ba 'yang boses mo ngayon? Your voice doesn't sound feminine. Not masculine either. Parang unisex? Haha! Kasi parang kahit anong gender mo, babagay ang boses mo."
Marahan akong napatango-tango habang pinipigilang tumawa, sana hindi obvious. She's right, though. This is my normal voice. I wasn't adjusting it deeper to make it more masculine to suit my crossdressing scheme.
"Hehe, thank you sa compliment, Mary—"
"Ahaha, it's actually Marie."
"Ay, sorry!" I covered my mouth and felt the urge to get out of here now. Bukod kasi sa hindi ako sanay na nakakatanggap ng compliments, napahiya pa ako! She gave good feedbacks about me whilst me being stupid, called her name incorrectly!
Ito rin siguro ang dahilan kung bakit wala akong kaibigan!
"It's alright, Agreste. But can we be friends?"
I'm dreaming, aren't I? My brows knitted as I try to process what she had said. "Po? Friends? You mean, kaibigan? Amigo, amiga? Tomodachi?"
Before she could even speak back, nagulat na lang ako nang biglang may kumalabit sa kanang bahagi ng balikat ko. When I glanced over my shoulder, I saw no one. Then I felt a hand rested on my left shoulder so my instincts told me to looked on the other side and a finger poke my cheek.
Eh?
Tumingala ako para malaman kung sino 'yon. I was absolutely shocked when I saw Ranpo smiling sarcastically again. I know what that smile meant!
"It means that you didn't have to translate the word to various language para maintindihan 'yon. How about I escort you to the library and have some tea, and show you the Merriam-Websters Dictio—"
"Hanggang dito lang kasi." I drew an imaginary wall between us para ipakitang hindi siya kasapi sa pag-uusap namin. Aside from pamimilosopo, hobby niya rin bang sumingit sa mga usapan?
He cringed and just dismissed my remarks. "Your friend's already oustude. Be gentleman enough not to keep her waiting," he said and tapped my back with so much force that I thought I'd throw my lungs up.
NAGPAALAM NA kami kay Marie at lumabas ng classroom. Today was Friday so a lot of studs were about to visit Ava as well. The three of us — Ranpo, Maisie, and me — rode an E-Trike together para makarating sa hospital. We could've just walked through but since we have the King of Anti-legwork, Maisie had to pay the fare. Well, minsan ang hirap ding gumala lalo na kapag pabuhat ka lang dahil wala kang pera. Ranpo here wasn't gentleman enough to share his fare kaya ang ending, nilibre kaming lahat ni Maisie. Nakakahiya!
Saglit lang ang biyahe namin dahil malapit lang naman. Though I introduced them to each other, silence ruled throughout the ride. Naghahanap din ako ng tamang tiyempo para matanong ang nga dapat kong itanong tungkol kay Ava. If I lose my chance now, will there be another?
"I need to talk to your friend," Ranpo told me when we arrived at the front gate. He must've sensed na wala akong balak i-interrogate si Maisie. Well, may balak naman ako, pero — argh. Ang hirap. Huehue.
"Why and about what?" walang-emosyong tanong ni Maisie.
Ranpo smirked and got his face closer to her ear. Teka! Ano'ng gagawin niya?! Oh— may binulong lang pala.
Nang inilayo ni Ranpo ang sarili niya, Maisie quickly looked at me. Wait, may kinalaman ba sa 'kin ang pag-uusapan nila? They engaged in a staring contest for a momentary while. What now? Did they just fall in love with each other?!
"Wait for us here, Cassien. 'Wag kang mauna kay Ava dahil hindi ka papapasukin ng parents niya unless you have me as her friend."
Ha? Hindi ako kasama sa pag-uusapan nila?! Was it really about me?! Bakit kailangan pang bumulong ni Ranpo? Indeed, holding my curiosity back was one of the worst things ever. Hindi ko maiwasang mag-overthink at mag-isip ng kung ano-ano. They just met, right? What are they gonna talk about thay required my absence? What do they know that they didn't want me to know? Kung tungkol talaga 'yon sa case, bakit ayaw nila akong isama?!
Sheesh! Parang inaagaw na ni Ranpo ang kaibigan ko!
Nang lumayo sila para mag-usap privately, I just lingered my gaze on the orange ground — well, it wasn't really orange, it's just the calming sunlight of the sunset. Medyo malakas din ang hangin at tahimik sa pwesto ko kaya naririnig ko 'yung paghampas sa isa't-isa ng mga dahon sa puno.
I get to wonder sometimes: What if the sky was green and the leaves were blue?
Dahil ayokong mas lalo pang ma-bored, inilabas ko na lang ang phone ko at binuksan ang Facebook app. Okay lang kahit naka-free data, kunwari hindi masakit. Bukod d'yan, napapangiti na lang ako kapag nakikita ko ang basag sa screen nito. This thing has been with me since my first year of highschool. All of my allowance were bestowed for my tuition fees and other school requirements which overtook the things that I wanted for myself.
Nagsimula akong mag-scroll sa Newsfeed ko. Puro posts lang ng pages or sa mga groups na sinalihan ko ang tanging makikita. I don't have a lot of friends here — few of my classmates, na parang mga introvert pa, then my parents and of course, Maisie.
Well, don't ask about my Messenger kasi inaamag na rin. Dadalawang tao lang ang nakakausap ko — si Mama and si Maisie rin. Ta's ang kaisa-isa ko pang group chat kung saan madalang lang mag-chats ang classmates ko dahil ando'n din ang teacher namin.
Maybe they had a separate noisy group chat where our teacher and I wasn't added? Ang sakit, a!
While scrolling, may napansin akong post ng isang page.
When your passion was Satanism then you finally died, excited to meet your lord but you were sent to heaven and you be like: "What the bloody hell?"
It gained a thousand of reacts. Grabe namang dark joke 'to, pero napatawa pa rin ako. Magdusa ka sa langit, baby! HAHAHA!
Sandali. May Facebook account din ba 'yung mga clubmates ko?
Una kong s-in-earch ang pangalan ni Ranpo. Lumabas agad 'yung account na chocolates 'yung profile photo. This is undoubtedly his account. I snickered as stare at the photo. Grabe, addict talaga yata siya sa chocolates. Good thing his teeth weren't damaged for this obsession.
Mutual friends namin ang mga kaklase namin. I pushed the Add Friend button. Walang nakalagay sa bio niya. There wasn't any information about where he lived, studied or his hobbies. There were also no posts na naka-public. This seemed like a dead account. Baka sa Instagram siya sa active?
Jusme, ang hirap mang-stalk kapag naka-free data!
I also searched for Conan's account. Ang daming lumabas pero may dalawa akong nakitang accurate. I visited the first account where his face was the profile photo (btw, mukha siyang model do'n).
ah lavio, too. That was his bio. What does it really mean?
Wow, ang dami niyang friends! Well, what could I expect from a son of a rich family? He also had a lot of reactors, mostly girls na nagko-comment rin na may heart emoji pa.
I went back to the other search results and tapped the other account. Mukha niya rin ang profile photo pero mas simple. Is this his private account? Wala ring bio at naka-private rin ang lahat ng posts at informations. I also clicked the Add friend button. Maybe if we become friends, I'd see their own timelime.
I thought of Newt. Panigurado may account din 'to.
Before I could even tap the search bar, I felt my surrounding gone weird. Nakaupo lang naman ako rito sa pabilog na semento na may puno sa gitna. Some medical staffs were rushing and civilians were following them. Ano'ng mayroon?
My eyes trailed them and I realized they were all rushing in front of the building. May mga taong nagkukumpulan at parang mga bubuyog na may samu't-saring sinasabi kaya hindi ko na naiintindihan. There's only one thing bothering me: Makiki-chismis ba 'ko?
From here, nakita kong may stretcher na hinila ng mga medical staffs mula sa crowd. Then, I saw a man covered in blood, laying on it and being dragged inside the hospital. Ano'ng nangyari? Accident?
Parang naninikip ang dibdib ko. I got to my feet and tightened the grip on my phone. This was the main reason why I didn't like being in here. Hospitals are the paradigm of suffering, sorrow and grief.
My peripheral vision caught someone in the front gate. Thence, I shifted my head to take a careful, clearer sight of that someone.
My legs almost give in and my eyes widened. I almost dropped my phone.
It's the same clown, walking away.
–– : ––