'Look Alexandra,' Liam began, as soon as the last one had left, 'I do believe you. No matter what.' And the expression his eyes carried - the confidence - had somewhere become endearing. Alexandra had heard of a smile reaching someone's eyes, but Liam's pair shone with all the expressions there could be. She was so very sure that she wouldn't ever grow tired of sitting and gazing into them.
And it wasn't the best time for it, but she couldn't help smiling.
'I know, Liam!' She replied, 'I don't mind - and, that's a valid doubt. I am Dovish. I could be helping my brother. It's like expecting everybody to blindly trust me, it's impossible.'
He didn't respond immediately, giving her more time to find other emotions in his eyes. But all she found was an ocean of charm, pulling her within, threatening to drown her. As time had passed - it had become easier and easier to face Liam. In that literal sense, because previously, he had felt - if not completely - largely intimidating. Superior - higher. Those were things of the past now. They had each other's trust - and beyond all that, they had always been so frank and direct that there was simply no scope of a misunderstanding. Besides, as far as formidable eyes were concerned, Diana's green pair were the troublesome ones. They looked straight out of a mossy lake - dangerous in every sense.
'You're telling me that the whole, gigantic speech I just gave - was for nothing. You did NOT say that. I know you didn't.' He said, after a short pause, which made Alexandra laugh.
'No - of course not. That wasn't a speech, and I felt you were giving me a little more credit than deserved. But it was nice,' she added, with a mischievous grin. 'I was furious, and when I am angry I don't frame sentences well - or speak my mind out perfectly. You told everything I wanted to, and coming from you it sounded-' but she caught herself midway, lest her incorrigible tongue let slip any comment that could betray her feelings. 'It sounded more right, and sounded truer. For the base of it, Liam - I didn't expect it. I didn't expect you to risk antagonizing all of them, whom you've known since - I don't know, but you have certainly known them for longer than you have known me. And all that "why'd you do it" and "you shouldn't have done it", I am not going to say those - because I just - enjoyed listening to it.'
The single line that Alexandra didn't add there, or possibly couldn't add there, was - It was bold, it was a tad bit over-confident and it was certainly not the best course of action, but now that you've done it, I love you all the more.
After saying all that, and not saying a few things, she wasn't done with speaking. But before continuing, Alexandra had one sweeping look of the Meeting Hall. It seemed much bigger now. The chair pushed back by each of the nobles for leaving, were scattered. And if she were to raise her volume, she was very sure there would be a gigantic echo. Where were they headed? The war was over, people could soon be parting ways - most of whom she knew were already engaged, a few were married. It somehow rang the bell that the age of looking after the career was over, perhaps now was the age of looking at the personal side of life. Alexandra, as far as she knew, had a non-existent personal life. No interests, not hobby-wise not heart-wise. No special interest in a fellow human - apart from the one sitting right next to her. And he didn't seem largely inclined to make any move, and Alexandra knew she was not confessing first. It was as if they had locked horns and were seeing who was pushed to confess the feelings first. But it was more peculiar in Alexandra's own case. She had nothing to fear - her proposal would be gladly received. But in her stubbornness, she just knew she was not doing it. The silence was stretching for longer than necessary, and for now, she decided to break it. 'You said you are decided upon what that next step should be. Mind sharing it with me?'
'Not yet,' he replied, swiftly. 'I have no conclusion yet,' and then catching Alexandra's confused stare, he got up. That put so much difference in their heights that she was afraid she wouldn't be able to hear him anymore and made use of her own legs to straighten up. Liam seemed to be thinking, for he drifted to the chair the treasurer had occupied, pushed it towards the table and leaned onto it. Alexandra crossed her arms and followed him, but when she realized he was walking aimlessly, pushed back another chain and put her back against it. 'You see, I first need to know what Austin,' and he threw her half a glance, perhaps to make sure that she wasn't revolting against the very topic. Even such a small, attentive gesture pleased Alexandra heartily. 'What Austin exactly said.' Liam finished.
'May I ask why?' She questioned, for a little disobedience was valued by wisest of men.
'You ask the question and the permission for asking the question, together.' He answered, straightening up and clapping Alexandra on the shoulder in a "you still have a lot to learn" manner, 'But to answer, we have here, the Queen of Ethoris' thirst for revenge. No matter what, she will put in every bit of her worth to get even. Her worth is, unfortunately, quite a lot. The reason, that unlike war, this time we need a little more understanding.'
'Thirst for revenge.' Alexandra repeated, holding on to the one phrase which clarified that Liam had his own struggles with Aunt Deplorable - Aunt Sabel, that was. 'I don't know anything about thirst for revenge. I was just - in her way - and she got rid of me. But her true enmity seems to be with you. Why don't you tell me what connects it? What the reason behind it is?'
As if unconsciously again, Liam drifted to the next chair, leaning on it too. And she followed suit, 'Come on, tell me.'
'It won't help,' he shook his head. 'It is the past, it has passed - and it is ugly.' He added, with a little more stress on ugly than Alexandra would have preferred. And the slight vehemence he said it with, the way his eyes glazed over, almost becoming devoid of emotions, she decided those were the the most dangerous waters she could enter with Liam.
'Says the man who asked me to embrace my past,' Alexandra reminded, nevertheless. The words didn't have the desired effect of provoking him, in fact, he smiled.
'But this is not my past, Princess. A great deal of it happened before either of us were born. There is nothing to embrace - it is only a burden. There was something I could learn from it, and I did. If it was possible to selectively forget things, I would have shed this one more than a decade ago.' He smiled again, knowing he had got the better of Alexandra for the umpteenth time. 'And now, I would be much obliged if you answered my question.'
'Right.' She granted, but was by no means, satisfied. Ugly or heavy or dirty or history, she was going to extract the forgettable details from him. Maybe, it wasn't time yet. It certainly would be, one day, and for all she was worth, Alexandra was going to wait for that day to come. 'You just watch, you will be begging me to listen, very soon,' she added - it was received by Liam with a compliant tilt of head. 'As for Austin, he had quite a lot to say,' she continued, talking of the whole four hours in about five minutes. And when she was done - it felt strange that in so much time, she had talked so little, asked so little.
'I feel he was not lying. He has done enough blunders, for all he's worth. He knows this is the only way to make things right.' Alexandra concluded, nevertheless.
'That I can agree with,' Liam nodded, a hand to his chin - still leaning on the chair, for it seemed to be the most comfortable place on the planet. 'But it waters down to a single thing - we have to see Ethoris.'
'It would have been better if I had gone to Ethoris two years ago,' Alexandra confessed bitterly. So less had happened in Doveland. Going to Ethoris, having gained a bit of experience there - would have helped her much more.
'Maybe. Maybe not.' He countered, 'We don't need to know.'
'Do you mind not saying something and countering it, at the same time? Gets confusing to understand what you mean. Not like it's easy normally either.' Alexandra fired at him, and then shook her head with half a smile, they couldn't help it. He couldn't help those little puzzles he dropped around generously, and she couldn't help grimacing at them. For now, Alexandra's mind was cloudy and conceited enough without listening to philosophy: a simple "yes" or "no" would have been good enough.
'Take a "no" in that case.' Liam offered. And then, without waiting for more exasperated reactions (grimaces), continued, 'So - maybe a skilled spy for Eth-'
'Me.' Alexandra interrupted. And had she known that the simple word could make Liam lose his composed air, she would have suggested it long ago. He shook his head almost decisively as Alexandra gave up leaning on the chair and stepped up to him, 'Yes, me.' She repeated. 'I'll go. I must go.'
He stared at her incredulously, his eyes not shining as much as before. They were really close, a proximity that wouldn't be considered innocent. He looked at her like had expected anything - except this, and as decisively as he had shook his head, 'No,' he declared, simply.
'Wait- what?' She gawked, stepping away instantly, 'No?' She too had expected anything - except this. The person who had recommended her for the espionage - the first person who considered her capable enough for independence - she had never expected to hear a "no" from him.
'No.' He repeated, as if to rub salt on a wound. 'I agree you are hasty, Alexandra - please don't be stupid now too.'
Stupid? I did not know I was that. And - he's red. Dove's droppings - he's blushing!
The realization made her jaw drop momentarily. She had seen a lot of men blush. Watson did so - Mark did it - and hundreds of other spies, she had seen them all go red. But it was a different level of satisfaction to see Liam do so. Presently, he seemed to realize the fact himself - and the priceless nervousness etched across his face made Alexandra turn away to hide a smile. The great, divine king of Vedessa was nervous.
'Look,' he began, attempting to calm down but failing. 'No, don't look at me.' He then said, Ethoris and spies forgotten.
'Why not?' She asked, though it was mutually understood that the meeting of eyes lead to reddening of cheeks.
'Your face is crimson - and it's soon going to become blood red.' Liam informed, a little savagely - as if to say that he wasn't the only one losing it. And then Alexandra became aware that heat had risen to her own face and that her neck was warm - her hands cold.
And she concluded that enough was enough. Two people who were supposed to be the most responsible ones in the entire Vedessa, were standing in a Meeting Hall and battling blushes. One way or the other, either now or never. She wasn't going to regret keeping mum all her life. 'Have two people ever liked each other more evidently, Liam?' She questioned, 'We are such a mess!'
A hand reached his eyes faster than an arrow could have. But he was grinning, and shaking his head at the same time. 'The traitor Mark Fannel!' He exclaimed, and it amazed Alexandra how swiftly he had seen through the betrayal.
'Don't you say a single word against my brother.' She warned, 'And as for the like, I've thought of you every single day since I met you. Every chapter in my life had got your name at least once, even though we've lived the maximum portion of it miles apart. Is it possible to think of someone each day - and yet not fall in love with them?'
'You are getting wiser,' he praised, but was still not completely composed, 'and better each year. But even if you didn't, I know I couldn't have helped it one bit. I'm sure you have heard of the phrase "healing the heart". How I despised it! Loathed, and hated to hear of it. I wondered which love struck fool had emitted it, until I began feeling something intense for you, Alexandra.' And then the distance seemed too much, because he took a step ahead, placing them just a few inches apart. 'Even beyond love.' His voice didn't break, even if there was a traceable tremor in it. Alexandra thought it rather commendable, that like everything else, he controlled his feelings remarkably well. 'That was when I realized you were doing that to me - when people asked me what the reason for humming in the mornings (I would say I hum terrible, and gave them a headache with it), or for beaming at everyone, or entertaining ladies at banquets more comfortably - I realized I was becoming love struck.' And he stopped for a just a fraction of second, but didn't stop shaking his head. Now that he had removed the hand from his face, she realized she hadn't ever seen such an earnest look. 'Ah, and they figured it out when I called a particularly important Lady Arabella, as Alexandra. She was outraged, and I wouldn't entertain her rage, so she vented it to the ministers - who consider themselves my guardians and mentors - and they figured out that a lady named Alexandra,' he said, eyes twinkling like little flames as he grasped both of her hands. The warm touch made Alexandra crack a smile, such that all discomposure was forgotten, and Liam reciprocated, boldly. 'That a lady named Alexandra,' he continued, 'had stolen my heart, even without realizing it.'
So true, the last part. Why couldn't a person be informed, the moment somebody had developed feelings for them? But that would be terrible, Alexandra realized, very soon.
'Your double identity helped me, then. They didn't figure out it was you, or they would have made it tougher, by poking their noses (and everything else they possibly could poke) into the matter. And why did I not tell you, Alexandra? Because, the worst part is that for so long: I was afraid,' sounds silly, he added, in an undertone, for all the frankness they had. 'Yes, sounds silly, but I was. And knowing how ... how uninterested you were, in heart and love. First I had suspected you would be everything like Olivia, I have not been so wrong ever in my life. Completely the opposite, sometimes to an extreme, everyday, it just swelled up - and I realized I had done such a noble deed in declining those five proposals from the Queen of Akwanda, or it would be such an embarrassing situation - having lost your heart to your sister-in-law! All the same, I feared that in my haste, I'd lose the friendship too. That taking one step forward - would mean the bridge would collapse, leaving an impassible abyss between us.'
How similar to Alexandra's own fears. And only two minutes ago, she was determined to not make the first move. Now, when it was no use, she cursed herself for not owning up a bit earlier - keeping quiet day after day, month after month. Had she mustered up the courage earlier...
'I got it.' She declared - determined to put a part of the blame on him too. 'I got it.' She repeated, 'You might be very good at reading minds, Liam, but you are an absolute blockhead when it comes to reading hearts! And oh, I am really cross now! If only you had said all of this a bit earlier - we could have had months to make memories - not this last minute idea of a farewell! By all me-' but Liam stopped her with a hug. One minute she was speaking and the next, she was stopped by the most beautiful feeling of her life.
There were types of embraces: brotherly ones, fatherly ones and friendly ones. But this was surreal. A lot of unsaid things went into it, and Alexandra's heart rattled in her rib cage, as if to say, break this body! This cage! Free me- I want to unite with my better half!
All her life, somehow - seemed to have been leading towards, pushing her to, this single moment. All of her previous notions seemed to be unscrambling, Alexandra felt she was changing - getting reassembled, rearranged.
Rose's voice passed through her, make sure to marry him, Alexandra! She had joked, when Alexandra had talked about finding someone who truly understood her.
She felt Liam's lips on her forehead- a tiny, tender kiss- full of love and respect, 'Would you mind getting engaged, Exiled Princess?' He whispered, giving Alexandra a feeling close to her core melting. 'And there, that's the first memory.'
'One more?' She ventured, 'Also, such a dry engagement. Where's my ring?'
'You are, as usual, a little behind time.' He replied. Alexandra felt he was squeezing her tighter, closer - it made her feel drunk with love. But she did not know what he meant by that. She had felt him leave her hand, felt him drop it gently down, but she didn't know what he mean.
'Liam...' She began, 'kiss me goodbye.'
'You're not going,' he said, nevertheless kissing her again on the forehead, then on the temple, on the cheek, on the jawline.
How was she ever going to leave him!?