I dragged Lee into the front room for a second.
"What do you mean Cubs!"
"Keep your voice down," he whispered taking my hand to make our conversation look like a private smushy moment.
"Cubs!"
"Yes don't worry they won't change for a while yet, but you best make up with my mother because she is about to become your best friend," he said smiling and finding this all too amusing.
"Hell no, she can go fu..."
"Come around for dinner and give you advice. Excellent idea. I'll arrange it," he said.
"No. She is in my bad books. I don't want her in my house," I snapped.
"We are married, it is our house and she is my mother, as such she is welcome here at all times," he said fixing me with a glare.
"Fine if that is how you are going to be, let's give my mum a call and invite her over so you can deal with a shitty mother in law as well!"
"Your mother would love me we both know that," he said flashing a butter wouldn't melt grin. "But just to give you then heads up our mothers have already had a run in when arranging your sisters wedding and well let's just say your mother is lucky to be still be alive. I wouldn't risk dangling her in front of my mother again as she might not be so lucky next time."
"You are just saying that to make me like your mother!"
"I never joke about my mothers temper."
I couldn't help but grin. Even biting my lip couldn't stop it.
"You can get the advice from her and tell me," I suggested.
"Nice try..."
"Mae, I swear Willow is growling," Mike called.
I sighed. "Erm, yeah it's a new thing, beats wheezing and coughing," was all I could think to say.
Lee giggled.
"Lee! It is not bloody funny!"
"Just give me a quick kiss before we go back to the table or our little Sabrina will get up to her tricks again," he said moving in closer.
God he is sexy, I thought as his laughing mouth kissed mine, making me laugh in return... our first proper, non spelled kiss and we were laughing. Sexy, sexy, Bastard!
"Can you two get a room if you're going to make out, there are kids present!" Mike shouted making me giggle even more... oh great I was going all teenager on him. I didn't want to be a giggling teenager, I wanted to be a sexy woman who knows what a man is for and how to use him. I grabbed Lee's hand and pulled him into the hallway. This kiss would not be teen!
Reaching out a hand to the nape of his neck I pulled his head towards mine and to my delight he was as keen for the kiss as I was. I don't know who discovered kissing or how it came about but I love them for it.
That kiss turned into a mini snog and as Lee pushed us into the downstairs toilet and closed the door... wow! Oh my god he's good I thought as we snogged and eventually ended up with Lee sat on the toilet and me straddling him. Shouldn't be sexy but boy was it ever!
His hands in my hair, cupping my face as he controlled the kiss and I let him. In fact I would let him do anything to me, I thought as I felt his hand slide up my top to cup a breast. I was grateful for my non bra status. A good bit of snogging, breast teasing and crotch grinding later I lay back to prop myself on the sink behind. I removed my top and wished I had turned the light on in there for a better view. Lee's hand squeezed a breast and I moaned as I felt the warmth of his mouth find a nipple and consume it. My hand reaching down and undoing his trousers, so I could reach inside and pleasure him. I giggled to myself as I noted my sister was right about the tail. Hello Mr Impressive!
His mouth returned to mine, and I knew as hard as he was, he wasn't going to last much longer. Given my current circumstance due to losing the baby we couldn't do what I knew we both wanted to. Instead I slid off his lap and took him in my mouth making him gasp and grapple for the wall either side to control himself. I had just got a rhythm going and felt like the queen of blowies when the front door started knocking. I paused and listened.
"Don't stop," he begged breathlessly pushing my head down again. I continued as Wendy yelled 'I'll get it'. For a while I was distracted by a very insistent and close to bursting Lee who I was super keen to impress. Just as he came I heard his mothers voice... OMG! Half choking on the contents in my mouth as he echoed my thought with 'shit my mother'.
Catastrophe struck as we panicked. I rushed up from my knees as the same time Lee tried to stand, resulted in my head banging off the sink, his still hard willy poking me in the eye like a javelin and his pelvis giving me a split lip.
"Fuck! Owww," we both said aloud. Lee grabbing his man parts and sucking his breath through his teeth and I grabbed the back of my head.
"I'm suing you," he said through gritted teeth.
"I have a screw boo," I said feeling my lip. "I'm bleeding."
"Oh my god I think a have sprained my dick."
The door knocked gently. "Erm.... guys, the in-laws are here," Mike whispered.
"Ok, coming," I replied. "Can you turn the light on I have a sexjury?" I asked as the switch was on the wall outside.
I heard Mike laughing and knew full well he would go tell Wendy.
It came on and highlighted the ridiculousness of our situation. Both of us started laughing and by the time we sorting ourselves out and put away our respective adult bits we were in hysterics. Still in pain but laughing.
"Lee what is the hold up?" his father asked outside the door.
"Erm... pariapism," Lee replied.
"What is that?" I asked.
"Bonejury," he replied setting me off again.
His father passed him a packet of frozen peas through the door as I held tissue to stop my lip bleeding and my eye recovered enough to stop watering.
"What are we going to do? How are we going to face them?" I asked.
"Well I will be limping and refusing to sit down...."
"I'm sorry, but you nearly took my eye out and then smacked your hip in my face. I'm going to need a guide dog to find my way out!"
There he was sat on the toilet with a bag of peas on his crotch and I had my face in his lap so I could use them too. Oh how I wish my sister was alive to hear this sexcapade!
"Are you ok?" Lee asked stroking my hair and rubbing my back.
"Mmmhmm were we just spelled?" I asked.
"I think it was gentle nudge and the rest was us," he replied.
"Yeah I didn't feel spelled," I admitted.
"Me either," he replied. "Best spell ever!"
I giggled as I snuggled up to his frozen pea crotch. It looked his hand in front of my face. The wedding ring looked vintage, embossed in the middle with a line of lions. I bet it been handed down throughout the generations. I pulled his hand to my mouth and gave the ring a kiss.
"Thank you, that is a lovely thing to do," he whispered making my heart swell.
"LEE!" his father called impatient.
"I'll go out, you sneak upstairs and straighten up," Lee suggested.
"Deal," I said.
I stood up and helped him up with a groan. Cheekily pulling his boxers out so I could sneak a look.
"Looks ok to me," I said as my mind thought 'I can't wait to have a go on that'.
"Pervert," he teased.
"You betcha," I replied as I popped up on my toes for a kiss.
"Mmmm," he said against my lips as we got a bit carried away.
"LEE!" his mother yelled.
"Now there is a cockblocker if ever I heard one," I sighed. I opened the door and bolted up the stairs giggling like a naughty teenager caught making out the parents.
I rummaged in my bag to find my toothbrush and thanked god I hadn't ventured inside to say hi first as I had 'There's something about Mary' going on. Why does this stuff always get in my hair?
I used the bathroom and made myself presentable.
"MUMMY!" Suri called running upstairs so I rushed with a tissue to get it out. "Uncle is here and he brought my cat!" she said hugging it to death in her arms.
"Ohhh great," I replied.
"What you doing?" she asked.
"I was changing my top," I said pulling my hair into a bun and wishing I didn't look so flushed.
That kiss was so intense it had led to...
"Did you just spell me and daddy?" I asked Suri.
"No I was eating Pizza and Wendy has to go now because Mike is sleepy. I spelled him a little," she admitted.
"Thank you for being honest but you made a promise no more magic without permission or supervision," I said.
"Oww," she grumbled.
"We will speak with Uncle and see if we can find you a teacher so you can have lessons," I replied shooing her out of the bathroom.
"Ok but you are naughty too as you broke daddy's boy bits," she said.
My mouth falling open nearly tripped me down the stairs! Lee was having serious words with her as soon as we got rid of the unwanted visitors.