just a little look at what Daffy did while Adrian got crazy with duct-taping his family back together :)
highest volume if you wanna feel like Daffy. the more times you loop it, the better it sounds, no lie
not an INFP song (it's a me song ;P)
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Magic by the Cars blares through the surround-sound speakers in Daffodil's room. The room shakes with the boosted bass her uncle installed for her. The floor thumps with the tune, shaking her very body as she lays sprawled on the floor, surrounded by a fort of pillows and blankets, a can of Sprite in her hand. It sweats down the sides of the aluminum, leaving a ring of water on her floor.
Her room is fairly small, holding a twin-sized bed and a smallish dresser; there's just enough room for a quaint pillow fort. A long window lets in the north light on her bed, and a little lamp in the corner is all that lights the room.
The song fades into a buzzing quiet. Turning herself to her radio, she presses the repeat button and the intro rings through, filling the void she encases.
Of course, he would turn her down. What was she thinking? He told her his reasons and still, she ignored it and relied on, what? Luck? Wow, that was stupid.
Could it be that awful compliment she completely bombed? That was quite a low blow, man, what was she thinking? Who would take being called a baby as a nice thing?
No one, you idiot. She slurps her Sprite, feeling the fuzzy bubbles sting her throat. Weird, the song kind of sounds like the feeling Sprite gives. Actually, Coke might taste closer...
The song ends and her fingers find the repeat button by memory. It plays again, basking her in familiarity. Strangely comforting, but at the same time... reminding her that she can't have that magic she wanted.
Adrian is that magic. It's unexplainable; that guy's heart is... beautiful.
From the very moment she saw him, glaring daggers at her forehead, she knew he wasn't like the rest of them. Normal people never glare at you for doing nothing. But he... did.
Why? She had to know why. It seemed he hated her, he kept his distance, he showed her all of those walls.
And to think, she should've been satisfied with knowing the reason, but as soon as she found out why, she realized his walls were crumbling right before her eyes. And they barely knew each other.
The next thing she knew, he wasn't glaring at her. He was talking to her, he was looking at her. He trusted her.
Adrian wasn't normal.
And then... The thunderstorm.
Her cheeks burst into flames. Ugh! Stupid! She isn't supposed to blush at a memory of witnessing a panic attack! That hug is not what's important! It's that she could help him in his fears. A completely human guy. A guy who isn't perfect and needs help and comfort. That was the moment her eyes were opened to who he really is. That was the moment his glares and cruel words melted into a puddle under his feet and she couldn't keep her arms from wrapping around him. Yes, that was probably a slimy trick, using his weakness to sneak a hug in, but it's all she could get. Because as soon as the storm ended, his walls were back up and it seemed like he would do anything to escape her presence.
That stung, she couldn't lie. But it's the chase that's supposed to be enjoyable, right? At least, that's what she heard, but if anything, it really just drives the knife deeper every time he moves a little further away from her, says only what's necessary, avoids eye contact...
It actually really hurts.
Ughhhh! What a frustrating pain!
She whacks a supporting wall of her fort and the whole thing collapses on her in a poof.
Okay, it's definitely her, that has the problem. She blows a wisp of staticky hair off her face. It sticks to the pillow right next to her. Small cracks of light let the song leak into her dark domain.
This whole situation is just so depressing. Finally, a guy who she kinda likes can't even see his strength, and now they're both stuck. Alone.
Maybe it's him with the problem.
Yeah, blaming others is sorta her thing. It's so easy. She almost settles with that conclusion, but then the hair stuck to the pillow falls back on her face.
No, it's her. There. She's blaming herself. Is that what needs to happen? At least it's not as selfish, right? Or maybe it's more selfish...
Daffy remembers her Sprite. Her arm burrows through the pillows and she takes another sip as the song fades once again.
Reaching under the mountain, her hand finds the button and once again, the song begins.
It's only been a day, but her waffle addiction is yelling at her. Going every day to the diner, might not be her best decision because, instead of satiating her craving, it only fuels it.
She's going broke. Because of a stupid boy and her unreasonable stomach.
Frustration bubbles inside her chest, coming up to her eyelids and falling out in little, salty tears. Why does life have to play with such cruel rules? Why does she get the short end of the stick?
"I hate boys!" she yells through the mountain, at no one. "And I hate that I'm addicted to waffles!!"
Within a few moments, Daffy's aunt bursts into the door, a look of alarm on her flushed face.
"What on earth is going on, in here?" Charlice demands over the blaring music. Her curly black hair jumps out of her bun, having escaped the hair tie in her mad rush to Daffy's room.
"I hate that I'm not rich!" Daffy's voice pushes through the cracks of her collapsed fort with surprising strength. "Maybe I could buy him if I was!!" The words get drawn out in her dramatic sobs. "Maybe he would compromise his issues if I was rich!"
"Who?" her aunt asks, still confused. "And for goodness' sake, turn that cursed rock and roll down! The whole neighborhood will be on the phone in a few minutes!"
Daffy obliges, spinning the volume knob a few times. Her aunt exits the room, mumbling angry words in her first language; German.
Daffy sighs, letting the weight of the pillows and blankets smash her to the floor flat.
There's only one thing left to do: Go broke, buying waffles while watching the boy of her dreams suffer too. He's single as a pringle, as far as she knows. It might ease the disappointment to see that he can't be taken by anyone cuz of those thicc (with two c's) walls. And apparently, girls like the type of guy that doesn't show emotions of any kind and would rather die than reveal his seemingly little fears. So, that just leaves her to vie for his attention. From afar. Without his knowing. And no hope of ever getting him. Ever.
Because it's definitely him, not her.
Oh, here we go again, pointing fingers. She rolls her eyes at herself, the humid air from inside her little cavern filling her lungs.
Okay, it's her. What now? She doesn't even know what it is, she's doing wrong. So, how could she blame herself for no reason?
Wait, that's a bad train of thought. Because, at the end of the rails, it just ends up pointing back at Adrian. Her stupid thought process won't let her lose, no matter who ends up at the end of her finger. As long as it isn't her.
Absentmindedly, she points at herself, trying to imprint the thought into her mind.
It's her. The one with the problem. Adrian sees that and is wisely keeping his distance because she's the absolute best at pointing fingers.
Wait. That's it.
She's amazing at pointing fingers!
That's what she needs to fix. And perhaps, if she fixes that problem, looking inward instead of outward, maybe he'll see that she's trying to work on it, trying to fix her problem, and maybe he'll give her a chance.
The room is silent; she didn't notice when the song ended. Noticing the buzzing speakers, she decides to move on, skipping to the next track. A different sound fills the room, and with the new vibe, a new feeling takes place inside her.
Her realization's magic fades as she reviews it again. That's not even the reason he's staying away from her.
It really is him, not her. He's not only afraid of thunder but himself. He's afraid of love and the pain that accompanies it.
What the heck, he told this to her himself, she suddenly remembers. She's a horrible listener!
Daffy punches through the blankets and pillows to the surface, taking a deep breath of fresh air. Her Sprite comes with her and she takes a large gulp of the now room temperature soda. The disappointment inside her is now tangible on her tongue.
"I'll show you, Adrian," she groans, beginning to huff as her hair settles on her face. "Get ready to watch my sledgehammer kiss those stupid walls."
=============Aug-8-21=============
pub, Jan-30-22
repub, Jul-3-22
i find it really fun to compare sensations and experiences with musical sounds. for this particular Cars song, it feels like a cold glass of Coke with a lemon slice, going 80 in a vintage convertible right as the orange streaks of sunset begin to fade into the mountains.