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The bright orange dragon stood out from the bleak and grey island behind him as the group stood at the beach at dusk. They had nearly encountered the dragon's attack not knowing it was actually Eustace who by some way turned into the dragon all of them were watching now. He was trying to take off the golden bracelet that clenched around his wrist. By his grunts, Idalia could tell it was hurting him and digging sharply into his skin.
''He must have been tempted by the treasure,'' Edmund observed as he looked at the golden bracelet.
''Anyone knows a dragon's treasure is enchanted,'' said Caspian. Idalia nodded beside him but everyone else, especially Eustace in his dragon form, looked at them with flat expressions. ''Well, anyone from here,'' Caspian explained further, embarrassment seeping into his voice.
Lucy moved closer to Eustace trying to pull off the bracelet. When she did the dragon roared in pain and jumped on his other leg while shaking the other. Edmund watched him with a heavy look. ''Is there any way to change him back?'' he asked.
''Not that I know of,'' said Caspian. He looked to his left at Idalia with questioning eyes and she just shrugged in return not knowing anything about it either.
''Aunt Alberta will not be pleased.'' Edmund sighed as he turned back to Eustace.
A certain silence spread through the group as everyone tried to think of what to do next. ''The boats are ready, Sire!'' A crew member yelled from the shore.
''We can't leave him alone.'' Stressed Lucy, glancing between Caspian and the dragon.
''We can't bring him on board, Your Majesty,'' said Captain Drinian.
For once Idalia wished that there would be an easy solution to all of this. Or that maybe Eustace wouldn't be so dumb to wander off and be greedy over gold. They could have been back at sea already and heading towards the next island, instead of being here and trying to get over another obstacle on their way.
Caspian sighed. ''Drinian, you and the others take one boat back. The rest of us will stay here till morning and work something out.'' His voice was getting more and more thoughtful by the end almost as if the King himself was giving up. But he did want to sleep it over.
Idalia looked at him, worry knitting her eyebrows together as she could see how frustrated Caspian was. He was always the optimist one so getting so much trouble along the road to their destination was taking a toll on him.
Another crew member protested. ''But you've no provisions, and no means of staying warm, Your Majesty.''
Another setback in the plan. Then the dragon, Eustace, roared and breathed fire to the middle of the group of people where one single log was laying on the floor. It lighted up and kept the fire going. First, he proved that they do have something to stay warm and second after a long day he managed to bring a smile to people's faces. Night has quickly fallen as they set down around the fire to keep warm and rolled out their beds to sleep.
There was no food on the island and they didn't bring any from the ship either. Needless to say, Idalia was starving but there was nothing to do about that. It only made her anxious and unable to shut her eyes when she could feel constant pain in her abdomen. Then after that the guilt seeped in. She was in the worst place for taking care of an infant baby in her stomach. She didn't eat what she was supposed to, she was constantly running around, she put her body though stress and if her sixth sense was correct all of it was affecting the baby inside her.
But the idea of not going on the voyage was worse. All she would do is wait for Caspian to come back and think why she didn't go. Idalia was laying on her side, her hands nestled under her head as she tried to fall asleep. She did manage to catch Caspian's and Edmund's conversation as they were sitting on the rocks beside her.
''I've never seen these constellations before,'' said Edmund.
''Me neither.'' Replied Caspian. ''We're a long way from home. When I was a boy, I used to imagine sailing to the end of the world finding my father there.''
''Maybe you will,'' said Edmund with an uneasy voice.
Idalia opened her eyes knowing it was over with her trying to sail into the dreamland. Her peace was broken long ago. She was a long way from home too, but maybe it didn't feel that way since she was getting closer to her parents.
If they even were there.
She forcefully shook her head to rid of those thoughts and sat up. Immediately she felt eyes on her and she searched in the dim light who was watching her.
''Can't sleep?'' asked Caspian.
She turned her head to him and frowned. Caspian stood up from the rock and offered her a hand to pull her up. She took it and stood up but when she intended to let his hand go he held on to her firmly and guided her away from the bonfire. Idalia tilted her head up at him in confusion but she followed him without words to complain.
''Is something bothering you?'' Caspian slowed down to a stroll beside the sea.
Idalia shook her head. ''No, I'm fine.'' She easily lied.
Then he completely stopped and turned his body so he would look at her. The moon was bright and high in the sky so no matter if it was dark they could still see each other's faces. Idalia realised that a few seconds too late and Caspian already read the troubled expression she failed to hide.
''You know that you can tell me anything, right?'' He took a hold of Idalia's other hand and held them between them.
She nodded with the smallest of smiles, ''I know.''
But it often didn't feel like it. Especially now on the voyage, she didn't want to admit it but they were drifting apart unintentionally. She needed Caspian now more than ever but he needed his space as well. She watched him go through countless troubles every day and she didn't want to burden him with hers as well. So for both of them, it was easier to not talk and worry one another. They really did talk just on the occasion when they felt like they could relax and forget all the bad things happening between them. When Idalia looked into his dark eyes again she felt like he was trying to read her and silently convince her to speak up.
She only let out a small breath before answering. ''It's just all the problems with the mist you know. I feel like these are not even my thoughts, but the thoughts of the dark magic.''
Caspian softly squeezed her hands. ''Yes, I know that feeling.'' He agreed solemnly.
Idalia thought back to the magician on the other island. You will be tested, he said. Her eyes opened to a new interpretation remembering that sentence. You must defeat the darkness within yourself. The mist was constantly testing them, testing how strong Caspian and Idalia's relationship really was. Idalia never doubted in them but suddenly on this ship, she started too. Maybe that's the solution. She has to do the exact opposite of what her sense was saying to her now. She was scared but if they all wanted to succeed on this mission she will have to get over her fear.
Her eyes searched the brown ones of Caspian in the darkness as she debated. This was one of the rare times that they were alone and for the first time, she thought there would be no better perfect way to tell him her biggest concern.
''Caspian, I ...'' she started saying but left the sentence to hang in the air.
Idalia gulped down and briefly looked away. She clearly hadn't thought it through when she uttered out his name and now words were stuck in her throat. She looked at him again and after being able to see through that first layer of his expression, the one he was giving her because he wanted to be strong for her and he was prepared to receive whatever news she has, she saw how broken he actually was. Caspian was good at masking it but tonight he revealed it to her.
Idalia was suddenly very aware of his hands that moved from holding hers, to holding her waist. She closed her eyes and wished he would move them to her stomach, to feel their baby beneath her clothes and her skin. To feel the energy that she was feeling. She didn't want it to be true but her bump was already visible, yet she hid it with clothing and high-waisted pants.
Caspian raised his eyebrows at her as he was still waiting for her to finish saying what she started. Idalia closed her mouth and offered him a small smile, changing her mind, not being brave enough to do it.
''I love you.'' She conceded at last and told him that instead.
Caspian smiled, visible relief washing over him as he thought she would say something more serious. He raised one of his hands to cup her cheek and turned her head slightly upwards to kiss her. It was short and sweet but it left a lingering thought in Idalia.
When did I lose the bravery in me? Where's the girl that could survive on her own for years? And why didn't Caspian say 'I love you' back?
Maybe Idalia was just paranoid.
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