"What did he do? I'm feeling stabby."
That was how Natasha answered her phone when I called her. No greeting.
"Nothing," I told her. "Well, something. But it was a while ago, apparently, and I got over it. I just don't remember getting over it."
"Did Barnes accidentally trigger a memory of him being a dick to you? As the first thing you've actually remembered about him? That's kind of hilarious."
"There are good ones too, right?"
"I'm sure there must be," Natasha said. Wanda nodded to me assuredly, having fully stepped out into the hall now to talk to me. She must've been putting the conversation together based on my side alone.
"I wish those would come back!" I said. "Can we go on the tour still? Are you busy now?"
"Not busy," Natasha said. "I cleared most of my day for this."
"Oh. Thanks."
I felt a pang of guilt at having almost blown her off completely, just because I'd gotten overwhelmed. I should've humored her and finished the tour earlier. She'd cleared most of her day for me, and I got the distinct impression that she didn't do that often.
"Where are you?"
"I'm on the floor with all the apartments still," I said.
Wanda got close to my face to yell into my phone. "I can take her wherever you need to meet her!"
"Was that Wanda? What did she say? I couldn't hear. Ask her to say it louder."
"You couldn't hear that? Here, you're on speaker now," I said, pulling the phone from my ear and switching it.
Wanda got close to it again anyway, raising her voice and enunciating exaggeratedly. "I said 'I CAN TAKE HER—'"
I stepped away from Wanda, pulling the phone with me. Natasha snickered. "I heard her the first time. But tell her I'm taking the lead on this. I've known you way longer. And I know way too much about you. You tell me your secrets all the time. Completely unsolicited, usually."
"Oh, should I stop doing that?"
"No!" she said quickly. "I like it. You tell me everything, I tell you nothing. It's a good balance."
"I don't think that sounds balanced."
"She's a spy, so she's both very private and very nosy," Wanda explained to me quietly. "You leave the room after talking to her and think 'How did I just give her my life story, and all she told me was that she likes Italian food?'"
"What's that bitch saying now? Is she talking about me?" Natasha asked, amusement in her voice.
"I said 'YOU'RE A SPY, SO—"
I moved away again. "Where did you want us to meet you?"
"In the lab. I can get there now. Just gotta ditch Steve."
"They're sleeping together," Wanda informed me.
"Oh, okay," I said. "Get it."
"We're just in the training room. Training by the way, which is not what you and Barnes did in here."
"Um. I don't remember that, so I don't feel like I'm culpable."
"You're culpable," Natasha said dryly. "Meet me in the lab!"
She hung up.
"She's so cool," I told Wanda.
Wanda agreed. She led me to the floor I'd accidentally started heading to earlier, where Natasha was waiting right when we stepped off.
I texted Bucky quickly, because I felt bad not replying when he told me he loved me.
I miss you.
It was true. I did miss him.
My phone dinged as Natasha and Wanda fell into step next to each other, and I slowed, trailing behind them, knowing it must be another reply from Bucky.
I miss you too. Have fun. Don't put too much pressure on remembering. It'll come back. Love you.
"Are you seriously texting Barnes right now?" Natasha asked. They stopped to look at me with exasperation.
"Um, I feel like you're impossible to lie to," I said hesitantly. "So yeah."
"She is impossible to lie to," Wanda said. "Sometimes I feel like she's in my head, watching my single brain cell bounce around in there."
Natasha rolled her eyes. "I can't imagine the feeling. It must be so hard having someone in your head."
"Sass me again and I'll go in yours and I won't come out. I'll set up with a lawn chair and a case of beer, just waiting for your secrets."
"You're gonna tailgate my thoughts?"
"Yes. Ew, that is what I meant. Do you think I'm starting to act too American?"
"Let's see. Name an American football team," Natasha prompted her.
"The Dodgers!" Wanda said confidently.
"No, I think you're fine."
We started walking again. I texted Bucky back: Are the Dodgers a baseball team
I flipped my phone onto silent just in time for it to light up with his reply. Yes. Did you just remember that? I want to bust in your pussy later.
Were those two thoughts related? I honestly wasn't sure. Was he turned on because I remembered a baseball team?
I started typing. I miss you so mu
I stopped when I noticed Wanda peering over my shoulder. "Nat?" she said with concern. "She's about to text Bucky she misses him for the second time in five minutes. And that's the least concerning part of what I just read."
"That's too many times, Grace," Nat said.
"But I miss him, though?" I said.
"Sorry, I didn't schedule time on the tour for you to cry over Barnes. Completely slipped my mind. So you'll have to suck it up."
I gaped at her for a moment before laughing. Somehow, I knew she was allowed to talk to me like that. The corners of her lips twitched up, the way I knew they did when she was teasing me but pretending like she meant it.
"I can't believe you would say that to me," I said. "In my vulnerable state."
"Either suck that up too, or we can find you a storage closet."
"Is she always this mean to me?" I asked Wanda, laughing incredulously.
"It's how you know she cares," Wanda said sagely.
I backspaced out of the other message and replied instead, I have to go or I think Nat is going to hit my knuckles with a ruler :(
Another instant reply: Okay. I love you so much.
"Is he still texting you?" Wanda asked. "Let me see."
She held her hand out, and I gave her my phone. She shook her head. "These are the texts of a madman."
"Are you—wait, no, don't scroll back!" I protested, snatching my phone back. "Wait, aren't you supposed to be banned from using my phone?"
"Dammit!" Wanda said as a knowing smile spread over Nat's face. "Of all the memories that could have surfaced."
"Bucky was avoiding me," I remembered slowly. "I was on a dating app that night because Bucky wasn't texting me back."
"Um, okay, that's enough remembering!" Wanda said strainedly. "Think about something else. Go to your happy place. Um, vibranium arm. Scowling. Kinky sex."
"Okay, I think he likes cats."
"Yes. Good. Think about that."
"We shouldn't be suppressing her memories," Nat sighed, pushing the door of the lab open.
As soon as we stepped inside, a kid, maybe 15, approached us excitedly. "Dr. C!" he greeted. "Do you remember me? I'm Peter Parker. I taught you a bunch of TikTok dances?"
"If you remember a TikTok dance before anything I've ever said to you, this tour is over," Nat muttered.
"I don't—um, no. I'm sorry."
"It's okay!" Peter said. "I'm glad you're back. Maybe I can show you where you work? Dr. Banner is at lunch, so it's just me."
He added the last part nervously, eyeing Nat as she glanced around the lab.
"Hm," Nat huffed. "No Stark?"
"No. He hasn't been around all day."
Nat narrowed her eyes at him. "You're lying."
"What? No I'm—"
"Tony? Get your ass out here, coward!"
"I was planning on a grand entrance," Tony called, emerging from an adjacent room. "I was going to put on the motorized roller skates."
"No you weren't," Nat said. She pulled two chairs out from behind a counter and nodded to them pointedly. "You and Grace. Sit and talk. It's part of the tour. The rest of us will be back in half an hour."
"I'm sorry, Mr. Stark. It's really for the best, though, I think. You should really talk to her! It's healthy!" Peter said as Nat dragged him out the door by the collar, Wanda following behind.
Tony sighed. I shifted my weight from foot to foot, uncomfortable. Somehow, I felt like Tony's avoidance of me so far had been causing my memories to resist coming back. Like he was so integral that I couldn't remember myself without him. But I also felt like he could set them back into motion if he just talked to me.
"Have a seat, kiddo," he said, taking one of the chairs himself. I perched on the edge of the other one, suddenly ready to leave and go find Bucky again at a moment's notice.
"I'm sorry," I said. "I didn't ask them to—"
"I know! Why would you? You barely remember me," he said.
"I remembered more about you than I did about anyone else."
"Those dog tags look ridiculous with that dress. I hope you know," Tony said.
I looked down and realized I was rubbing my thumb against them again. I hadn't noticed myself doing it.
"They help me," I said.
"Well, whatever works. You've always liked to fiddle with stuff in fours. Nothing else calms you down. You even get anxious when you smoke weed."
"Did you know my mom?" I asked suddenly.
"Yeah," he said painedly. "Sorry. I'm sorry about your mom."
"I don't remember her."
"Yeah. Well—sorry."
"Could you tell me about her? Nobody else knew her."
"Ah—sure. Let's go to lunch. Sound good? We can have a heart to heart at lunch. I know a place."
"The coffee shop, right?" I asked as we stood up. "I remember that."
He eyed me, looking displeased. "Can you remember things slower around me? You're making me feel bad for avoiding you."
A/N: #1 in marvel yesterday and #2 today yall omg thank you for reading!!💖