"Fuck, fuck, fuck," Emma screams in agony as she flings forward in bed. "Shit," she hisses, forcing Regina to slingshot up in bed as well.
"What? Is it the baby? Is she coming?" Regina's scratchy voice frantically questions while her eyes land upon Emma trying and failing miserably to reach her foot.
"No, no, no," she groans in severe pain. "Charley horse," she whines, latching onto Regina's forearm and clamping down like that might alleviate some of the excruciating pain viciously shooting through her foot.
"What?" Regina investigates because her mind is still trying to clear the fog away from her dreamless sleep.
"My foot, oh my god, fuck," she cries out, her nails biting into Regina's flesh and marking her with little crescents.
Regina moves without thinking, scrambling toward the edge of the bed and snatching up the foot that appears stiff and extended the most. "This one?" She questions, her thumbs pressing into the arch to squash the pain.
Emma inhales sharply, as though she's terrified to even breathe but she nods hysterically along to inform Regina that she has the right menacing foot.
"Does this hurt?" Regina nervously questions while her hands move quickly to rub every inch of pain away.
"No, it's helping," she assures her, cautiously taking a small breath as if she may jinx herself.
"Tell me where it hurts most?"
"Right there, your thumbs are pushing on it," she says through a clenched jaw, her fists balling the sheets and comforter around her.
That's when the door swings open, banging against the wall and forcing all movements in the bedroom to desist. Regina glances over her shoulder, Emma pivots to discover Henry heaving in the doorway.
"Is the baby coming? I heard screaming," he nervously questions, his head tilting to the side curiously when he finds the position his mothers are in.
"No, Henry. Your mom woke up with a Charley horse and I'm trying to rub out the pain."
"Sorry, for waking you, kid," Emma hisses.
"It's alright," he mumbles, scratching the side of his head as he watches his mothers curiously.
And yes, he has seen them in the privacy of their home being affectionate toward one another but seeing them in bed together, in the middle of the night, in pajamas, is a whole new appreciation for the family they have now.
"That's much better, thank you," Emma sighs in relief, earning herself a little love pat upon the top of her foot.
Regina slides back up toward the bed, attempting to straighten out the comforter and sheets from their frantic movements, that's when she notices their son lingering.
"Henry?"
"Hmm?" He blinks up at them as if he didn't even know he was still standing in their bedroom.
"Are you alright, dear?" Regina tentatively questions.
"Oh...yeah, yeah. Of course."
"You sure, kid? You seem a little lost," Emma adds on, yanking the blankets up Regina's lap because she knows she's freezing in this icebox.
A small tug occurs at the corner of Henry's mouth as he watches them interact with one another. It's kind of cute watching Emma care for Regina even though she's the pregnant one.
"Nah, I'm good. I'm...happy to see you two so happy, um comfortable," he stutters, scrunching up his face in that adorable way Emma always seems to do and Regina really hopes their daughter makes that same facial expression. "We're like a real family now," he timidly adds on.
"Well, yeah, that was the goal," Emma teases, winning herself a shove from her partner in crime.
"Henry, have you not felt like we have been a family since we arrived back in Storybrooke?" Regina gently questions.
"No, I have. Even kinda before when we were in New York, we felt like a family but...um, seeing you two in this room together, in bed...it makes it feel more...secure...I guess."
And Regina hopes Autumn doesn't inherit the constant rambling that the Charmings seem to possess when nervous.
"And tomorrow our family is going to grow," Regina softly whispers.
"And it's really going to make our family solid," Emma beams.
"I know and I can't wait to meet her," Henry cheerfully says.
"Come along, dear. I'll tuck you in for old time's sake."
"Oh, me too," Emma exclaims, awkwardly clambering out of the bed.
"I don't need my moms tucking me in," Henry grumbles under his breath, rolling his eyes and all but both mothers are following him into the hall.
"Oh we know that, honey."
"We just never had the chance together," Emma flippantly replies, waddling into his room. "And this will kinda solidify us as a family."
"Whatever you say," Henry complains, yet there's a twinkle in his eye that reveals just how happy he is to have both of his mothers with him.
He climbs into his twin-size bed, a bed that might be getting a little too small for his height now that Regina thinks about it. He scoots beneath his navy blue comforter and Regina is right there, bending over him, her hair trickling down as she folds the top of the blanket down. She does this thing, something Emma has never seen before because she has never had the opportunity to witness this private moment, but Regina scrunches up her nose playfully and it's probably the most adorable thing Emma has ever seen Regina do. She leans down, her index finger lightly stroking Henry's chest as she places the sweetest kiss to his forehead.
And she whispers, "Goodnight, my little prince."
Emma melts into a big sappy puddle of love after that. Through watery eyes, she leans over Henry as well, ruffles his mop of messy hair and smirks.
"Goodnight, kid. I love you," she says with determination, pressing a firm kiss to his forehead like she has never meant something more and she needs him to trust in her words.
And Regina knows this is what the scared, little, lost girl inside always wanted, someone to kiss her goodnight and tell her that she is loved. It somehow makes Regina love her even more.
"Goodnight, moms, I love you too," he sleepily murmurs before he drifts off to sleep.
Finally at peace. No more feeling lost and unsure about where he came from or so broken from why his birth mother had given him up. No more feelings of uncertainty, a missing piece and longing in his heart for his mother that he couldn't remember from a curse. Finally, both of his mothers are together, his family complete and filling his heart until it feels full of love like he's never felt before.
~~~~
"You're awfully quiet," Regina gently says as she sits beside Emma while the nurse works easily around them. She lowers herself onto the seat beside Emma's bed and takes her lover's hand. "Are you sure you're alright?" She asks again for what feels like the hundredth time this morning and it's because she isn't receiving much of an answer.
Emma nods numbly, her eyes focused on her stomach, very clearly tuning out the world and all that outside noise. Regina's heart quickens, knowing something is off with her blonde and she should have listened to that staticky buzz that's been tormenting her blood all morning.
"Emma, what's wrong?" She desperately urges for the truth, clasping onto a clammy hand while she brushes those wavy locks away from Emma's face.
"Nothing," and it's too quiet for Emma Swan, vacant of any true emotion.
"Honey, please," she stresses in a whisper, catching the nurse's attention.
"Emma," the nurse begins, gathering the couple's attention, "this is all routine. I know we are in Storybrooke but you will have two of the best doctors in there with you. Everything will be just fine."
Again, Emma nods, her lips refusing to cooperate this morning. It's eight o'clock in the morning and they have another ten minutes before it's time for their scheduled c-section and Regina is panicking. And it's not just because she's worried about her daughter or Emma's safety from magic, it's because her girlfriend hasn't said more than ten words all morning. Even Henry couldn't get her to engage and that's when Regina knew something was radically wrong.
So, Regina decides to try something that might snap Emma out of whatever funk she is in. She presses her forehead against Emma's temple and whispers ever so delicately so the nurse doesn't overhear her.
"Baby, please, tell me what's wrong," she implores, inspiring Emma to slowly crane her neck and meet her watery eyes.
Emma breathes out a chuckle through her nose but it's the saddest laugh ever produced. "I'm...I think I'm just nervous," she weakly explains, persuading Regina to believe that maybe Emma is suffering from some inner panic attack that she's trying to suppress. "I've never had surgery before."
"I know but you are going to be just fine, I promise," she states with conviction, squeezing Emma's hand for comfort. "I'm going to be there every step of the way."
"I know."
And they are right back to Emma's vacant tone and blank stare. Regina guides a pale hand to her mouth, presses her lips to the back of Emma's hand and lingers, refusing to disrupt their connection. She wants Emma to feel her, by any means necessary, hoping that her touch will be enough for their magical bond.
"Alright Emma, it's time," the nurse cheerfully declares, motivating Regina's stomach to flutter with excitement. "We are going to walk down to the room, okay?" Regina's to her feet in record time, helping Emma up from the bed but the nurse stops her by a hand to her shoulder. "We have to prep her and unfortunately, only the medical team can be in there at the moment."
Regina doesn't have to look over at Emma to know she's internally panicking. "What? That's ridiculous, Dr. Whale said one person in the delivery room."
"And you will be, I promise. However, when she receives her epidural and for the first incision, it will just have to be Emma. I promise you, I will come and get you as soon as Doctor Whale gives the okay."
"Where is that idiot? I want to speak with him-"
"This is standard, for every procedure. Emma will be just fine, won't you?" The nurse says more than truly asks as her attention darts to Emma who is so ghostly white.
Regina is sure she's going to faint at any moment.
"Sure," Emma barely whispers.
Regina steps forward, audience or not, and clenches both of Emma's hands. She pulls one hand to her lips and kisses those knuckles softly before placing it against her own cheek. "I will be in that room in no time," she sternly says, looking Emma square in the eyes.
"I know."
"I love you."
"Love you, too," Emma mumbles, then drifts closer for the softest kiss.
"While I'm taking her down, please change into scrubs and put a mask on for the surgery. It's all right here," the nurse instructs, gesturing toward the neat pile on the counter.
And then Regina is left behind, watching as the nurse escorts Emma out the door. She feels queasy, so utterly sick to her stomach that she has to wrap her arms around herself and hold her trembling body together. That's when she realizes, this isn't her own sickness. No, she's experiencing what Emma is feeling at the moment. These are Emma's fears. Emma's anxiety. Emma's panic attack that she's trying so desperately to hide.
She starts frantically pacing the small room as she pulls on the scrubs, due to the overwhelming amount of anxious energy violently coursing through her veins. She feels this urgency in her chest to run, forcing her stomach to flip uncomfortably. Her hands begin to tremble and she hates, absolutely detests that she cannot save Emma from this pain torturing her from within.
Yes, she's noticed how awfully quiet Emma gets under intense situations but she didn't know it's because she's suffering from some panic attack. No wonder she would always pop off and run her mouth whenever she's scared, Regina wants to lash out irrationally right now too from this feeling.
"Miss Mills?"
Regina's head jerks up so fast, her feet already scurrying toward the door. "Is she alright?"
"She's just fine, come on," she smiles, nodding her head toward the hall. "I told you I would come back for you."
"Thank you," she sighs in relief even though she knew this woman wouldn't forget her.
"Now, when we enter, keep your head down. Don't look at anything but the floor. I will lead you to Emma and you can sit beside her head. There is a sheet up, so you two will not be able to see the procedure, per her request." Regina nods firmly, remembering how grossed out Emma was by the offer. "The incision has already been made and I don't need you passing out on her. She needs you, so no matter how curious, keep your head down."
"Alright," Regina concedes, her heart pounding with excitement this time at the prospect of seeing her baby born.
"Here we are," the nurse announces. "Head down."
Regina rolls her eyes but she obeys the request, her gaze immediately locking onto the cheap linoleum below as she pulls her mask into place. And then her senses are over stimulated; from the beeping machines and the breathing machine, to the chatter of the medical crew, to the blinding white lights and the stench of sterilization, even the bitter cold air blowing around them. She keeps her head down, following the back of the nurse's white shoes.
"Look who I found," the nurse giggles playfully. "She was like a lost little puppy without you, Emma," she teases and normally that would irk Regina but she's too concerned with her girlfriend to pay any attention.
"Hi," Emma mutters behind her oxygen mask and it takes everything in Regina to steel her emotions so Emma doesn't feel how worried she is by her appearance.
"Hello, my dear," she softly says, sitting down upon the stool beside Emma's head. She bends down, trying to ignore Emma's arms that are extended to their full length and strapped down. She gently caresses a pale cheek, hating that she can't run her fingers through Emma's sleek hair because it's hidden away under a blue cap. "You look beautiful," she whispers, her eyes glossing over without her permission.
"Liar," Emma mumbles, but there's a tug at the corner of her mouth that says she's just teasing and she trusts in Regina's words.
"You are doing great. Just a few more minutes and we will have our beautiful baby girl." Emma nods along numbly. "I have a feeling she's going to look just like you. You and those strong Charming genes," she teases to distract Emma from what's really happening behind that sheet.
Emma flashes a weak smile. "Nah, she's going to be your twin."
"Alright Emma, you're going to feel some tugging and pulling but it won't hurt," Dr. Holland explains from somewhere behind that curtain.
"You're doing great, Emma," and it's the nicest thing Whale has ever said without some ulterior motive or sleazy remark to follow.
"Hey," Regina whispers, stealing back Emma's attention as she shakes slightly against the bed from all the tugging and pushing.
"Hey."
"Thank you for giving me our beautiful babies," Regina says through a wet smile, her index finger tracing the outline of Emma's stunning face. She leans in closer and lowers her voice. "All I have ever wanted in this world was a family I could love unconditionally."
"Me too, 'Gina."
"Alright, here she is," Dr. Holland announces just as the tiniest little cry echoes through the room. Regina peers into Emma's eyes one more time and they both choke on their own tears. "I know, baby," the doctor coos and then this little messy thing is being held up over the curtain for observation. "Congratulations on your beautiful baby girl."
"Emma, she's so beautiful," Regina sobs, failing miserably to hold back her tears of joy from the red baby screaming her head off now.
"Ugh, she is your twin," Emma slurs, demanding all of Regina's attention.
"Honey, are you alright?" Regina nervously questions, cradling Emma's face in her hands. "Whale?" She nervously calls over her shoulder.
"All her vitals are just fine," he assures them. "Maybe transfer a little magic. I'm sure this was a lot for your little one and she stole as much as she could during the procedure."
"The nurse is going to take your daughter to be measured and weighed, Regina, you are more than welcome to go over there and take some pictures for Emma," Dr. Holland announces.
"Regina, I'm fine. Go be with Autumn."
"No, I'm not leaving you like this," she demands, vehemently shaking her head while gazing deep into those sleepy eyes.
"You can give me a jump when you get back, kay?"
Regina shakes her head again, pressing her forehead to Emma's and closing her eyes. She summons their True Love magic and allows the tingling sensation to wash through her. She shivers from the contrast between the icy room and the warmth of love but she loves the way it soothes her shattered soul. She inhales sharply, breathing in the calming scent of salty ocean air with burning firewood. Her eyes spring to life when she notices a certain scent is missing.
"I don't smell lavender."
"She's probably not using magic now," Emma shrugs the best she can from being strapped down but she does sound less tired than mere moments ago. "Go, Regina. Go be with Autumn."
"Okay," she whispers and reluctantly lets go because her body is screaming to be near Emma, bathe in her warmth.
Regina rushes to where her little girl is screaming her head off. The nurses have her naked, under a heat lamp that also serves as a scale, amongst other things. She reaches out, her finger sliding into the tiny hand and her baby reacts immediately, squeezing that single digit with all her might. Brown eyes fill with tears again, a watery chuckle escaping her lips at the feel of her baby, her own flesh and blood. She never thought she would ever see this day.
"You can take pictures," the kind nurse that has been with Emma since the beginning reminds her.
She nods, working on autopilot to capture as many pictures as possible for Emma, for the family. She snaps away from every angle, even taking a few of Autumn clinging to her finger.
"She's eight pounds, eight ounces, nineteen inches," the nurse informs her, pointing to the digits coming up on the scale. Regina snaps another picture.
"Henry was only six," Emma grumbles from somewhere behind her. "I knew you were making me huge."
Regina laughs along, nothing can dampen her mood right now. She watches carefully as the nurse places a diaper upon Autumn and then carefully swaddles her nice and tight. Regina swallows thickly, everything becoming too much as one of her wildest dreams comes true.
"Congratulations, mom," the nurse sweetly says as she gently passes Autumn into her loving arms.
The mass of emotions are lodged in the back of her throat, making it impossible to speak, so she peers up at the nurse through her wet eyes and hopes the woman can see her gratitude. The nurse must because she squeezes Regina's arm and then leads her back to Emma.
"Emma, I have someone who is itching to meet you," Regina chuckles, her eyes still examining their squirming little girl. She carefully settles down on the stool again and bends down, proudly showing Emma what they created out of True Love.
"Regina-"
"I know."
"She's so beautiful. God, she looks just like you," Emma chuckles, even though tears are streaming down her face.
"No," she softly whispers, "I see the same little chin," she claims, gently tapping her daughter's chin.
"Look at her little button nose, it's all you. And that hair, those thick dark locks are you."
"She has your eyes," Regina softly whispers because the tears won't stop pouring.
"She has your angry vein in her forehead. Look when she cries, she's the spitting image of Madam Mayor," Emma teases, earning herself a throaty chuckle from Regina.
"I love you," Regina whispers, pressing her forehead to Emma's once again. "You did so well. Thank you for our beautiful babies," she cries, no longer in control of her tears.
"I am so in love with you, more than I could ever express," she mutters back with their baby girl safely nestled between them.
Neither one giving a damn about their public displays of affection anymore.
~~~~
"So, kid," Emma softly whispers, her eyes barely open from the exhaustion and magic that was stolen from her, "what do you think?"
"I think she looks like a baby, I don't know. If anyone, she looks like Davey," he says, carefully holding his new baby sister in the leather recliner next to Emma's bed.
Emma and Regina laugh, amused by his innocent thought process.
"Alright, Henry," Snow says through a wet giggle, "you get to go home with her, can I please hold her now?"
"Oh sure," he happily concludes, reaching up to pass Autumn into those grabby hands.
Snow cradles the newborn so carefully, more delicately than she did a few short months ago with her own baby. Regina peeks over at Emma, wondering how she must be feeling in a moment like this and sure enough those sparkling green eyes are filled to the brim with liquid.
"Hello Autumn, welcome to this crazy world," Snow coos in baby talk.
"More like welcome to this crazy family," Emma murmurs under her breath but everyone hears her and laughs along.
"Oh, she's so gorgeous," her mother proceeds, unable to hold back her tears of joy. "I never thought I'd see this day," she shakes her head before snapping up to meet Emma's sleepy gaze. "I know I'm being selfish but please don't go. I want my family together. I want David and Autumn to grow up together."
"Snow," her husband begins in a warning.
"Mom," Emma groans, her head rolling away in annoyance.
"I know. I just-ugh, I love you all so much."
"Then come to New York," Emma flippantly says like it's the easiest decision ever.
"Alright, grandpa's turn," David laughs, easily stealing Autumn away and god, does she look so tiny in his arms. He doesn't hold her like the women in his family, instead, he seems to balance her on his forearm, her little head cradled perfectly in his arm as he bounces softly. "You really are a princess, aren't you?" He murmurs like he only wants her to hear his words. "Remember, I have a sword and I won't hesitate to use it against anyone who dares to break your heart."
"Between the Savior and the Queen's daughter, I think she will be able to fight her own battles," Henry laughs, finding himself amusing but his mothers are smiling back at him, so damn proud of their family.
~~~~
It's just after three in the morning and luckily, Regina has been able to jump into action and feed Autumn for Emma.
After their daughter was born and they were transferred into the recovery room, Emma had a hard time staying conscious from the amount of magic expunged from her system when Autumn left. Regina's little boost helped for all of ten minutes before Emma was drifting off again. All her vitals were normal and she was breathing just fine, so Whale promised it was her body reacting to the magic.
Unfortunately, in the recovery room, Autumn needed to try feeding and Emma struggled. Between the exhaustion of giving birth, the aftermath of magic and the way her body felt drained because of her inner anxiety, she could hardly keep her eyes open. Autumn was screaming and reluctant to latch onto her breast, even the nurse tried massaging the breast to help the flow of milk but that only seemed to agitate Emma even more which Autumn immediately sensed.
Emma and Regina agreed she would breastfeed but it was too stressful and she couldn't even stay awake for the process. She felt self-conscious, but more so, she felt like a failure and it wasn't long before she was in tears, asking Regina if she would be mad at her if she didn't feel comfortable breastfeeding. Regina promised that she didn't have to do anything that made her feel uncomfortable, pressed a kiss to her lips and then told the nurse to retrieve bottles for Autumn.
Emma's head rolls to her left and damn her hormones for being so out of control. Her eyes fill with tears when she discovers Regina illuminating in the soft glow of a very dim light. Her features are so soft, her face free from any makeup, any stress and it does all kinds of things to Emma's insides. There Regina is, perched at the edge of the couch across the room with Autumn resting upon her thighs. Regina has both hands supporting their daughter's neck and back and she appears so utterly lost in thought as if the world around her doesn't even exist. She can tell Regina is smiling to herself, memorizing every detail of their baby's beautiful round face. Truthfully, she's staring at Autumn as if she's trying to convince herself that she's real.
"Baby?"
Regina's head slowly lifts, revealing that exuberant smile that brightens up their dark room. "Are you speaking to me or Autumn?" Regina muses, slowly standing, tucking their baby closer to her chest.
"If I say you, will you still throw a fireball at my face with our baby in your arms?"
Regina smiles, exposing just how madly in love she truly is and Emma has never felt so special in all her life. "How are you feeling?"
"Much better. I needed that sleep."
"And some magic," Regina coyly adds on.
"Did you transfer more magic while I was sleeping?"
"Of course. I just fed and changed her, would you like her?" Her girlfriend gently asks, peering down at the bundle of joy stretching in her arms.
"Yeah, I feel bad I didn't give her much skin to skin time," she sheepishly admits.
"Don't be, you didn't feel well," Regina quickly defends, already moving to unravel Autumn from the tight cocoon.
"Hold on." Emma holds her breath, preparing for the shooting pain that's about to zap through her lower abdomen as she grips the rails on the edge of the bed and scoots herself across the mattress.
"You need to be careful, no sudden movement."
"I know, I just want you with us," she innocently pouts.
Regina rolls her eyes but she carefully climbs onto the bed beside her. Emma lowers her hospital gown, exposing enough skin for her little one. Regina unwraps Autumn, peels away her onesie and then gently places her upon Emma's chest. She then pulls the blanket to cover Autumn's back and she even adds her small baby blanket on top to make sure she's warm.
"Hi, my baby," Emma coos in the gentlest tone imaginable, pressing her lips to the crown of her daughter's head while Regina caresses Autumn's back.
She feels so delicate, so petite against her chest and Emma is so scared to even breathe the wrong way.
"She's perfect, Em."
"I know, I can't believe she's here. I can't believe we created her out of magic."
"Out of love."
"I know," Emma concedes, stretching her lips to meet Regina's so sweetly.
"So, Autumn Swan-Mills?"
Emma hums, contemplating all the middle names they have discussed over the past few months. She's just really enjoying this private moment, so intimate, and she wants to make sure she memorizes it and never forgets how amazing this feeling of love is.
"I still like Autumn Raine."
Regina scoffs, "Autumn Marie."
"Autumn Snow, it's kinda cute and contradicts itself a little."
"We are not naming her after your mother."
"Why? Did you want Cora, instead?" Emma muses, their voices still barely above a whisper, but Regina groans deep in her throat.
"Autumn Adelaide," Regina counters.
"I don't know, that seems like a mouthful for a kid."
"How about Autumn Isabelle? You liked Isabelle before you chose Autumn."
"How about Autumn Bella Swan-Mills?" Emma beams with pride, remembering so vividly how she wanted to call her baby Izzy and Regina suggested Bella.
"Autumn Bella," Regina repeats, allowing the name to roll off her tongue, mulling over if she likes the sound of it. "Autumn Bella."
"I think we have a winner, although I'm still in love with Autumn Raine."
Regina purses her lips in consideration before she stretches and kisses the top of their daughter's head. "Alright, Autumn Raine Swan-Mills."
"What?" She incredulously gasps.
"I came up with her first name, it's only fair that you get to pick her middle name," Regina nonchalantly says.
"Seriously?"
Her girlfriend chuckles, swooping in to place a sweet kiss to her lips. "Seriously," she mocks, their lips molding into two matching smiles against each other.
"I love it."
"I love our family," Regina blissfully murmurs, her hand gently cradling Autumn's tiny head as Emma kisses their baby girl and they both simply enjoy watching her sleep.