I darted my gaze around the familiar surrounding of my room. Everything was the same, just like last time. The things looked so real, anyone could get fooled. I chuckled darkly at my thoughts, slowly making my way towards the bathroom.
My steps were slow and steady with anticipation. I halted at the exact place beside the sink, holding my dagger close to my chest inside my satin night-robe. I was nervous. Anyone in my place would be. My fingers brushed softly against the hem of my baby blue robe as I took out my dagger, tightening my fist across the bottom. The dagger had a snake design spiraling around the last part with a ruby embedded in the center and some texts carved alongside it. It had a very sharp and pointed front part. Ancient yet deathly. I looked at it, having second thoughts. Shaking my head roughly, I twisted it between my thumb and the other fingers. "I have to do it, there's no other way," I said to myself as I gripped the dagger, pointing it towards my heart. My knuckles were turning white because of the tight hold. Closing my eyes shut, I took a deep breath as I murmured the familiar word with a deep sigh, "Veilar".
As soon as the word left my mouth, I stabbed myself right into my heart, blood drenching the material of my shirt, a sudden redness making its way, pooling across the floor. I waited for the impact, to faint, to feel pain, to feel myself dying, but nothing came. Slowly, I opened my eyes as my heart thumped hard in my chest, making its existence known to me. It was clear that I was alive. I looked around myself to see my dark blood surrounding me. My hands were dark red and looked as if I recently murdered someone. Oh! Correct. I murdered myself and now I'm a ghost. Very funny.
I shook my head and took a deep breath, calming my heart as my steps moved forward. Like previous times, I pressed my blood on a particular spot on the wall. The door was supposed to be here. Like I said, the door appeared as soon as I pressed my palm against it. I opened my mouth partly, as my eyes turned its original yellowish-red color.
"Ernaline Achlys Morrigan" I spoke softly as the door opened, revealing a dark tunnel. Turning back, I looked at my bathroom for the last time, shoving my dagger inside the robe. My breath hitched as I turned around and strode down the familiar lane.
My eyes snapped open as I started panting, finding it hard to control my uneven breathing. I looked around to see that I was still in my room, lying comfortably in my bed with my legs entangled around my blanket. Swallowing the lump that had formed in my throat, I gulped down the glass of water that I had kept on the table the previous night. Same nightmare. The nightmare which hasn't let me sleep properly since I was 12. I got from the bed, lazily moving towards the bathroom to take a shower and get ready for college.
I let the warm water lurch down my skin, as I take a pile of my cocoa butter body wash, rubbing it against my body to create foam. Furthermore, I quickly shampoo and condition my hair before getting out and wrapping myself in my fluffy towel. Putting on a romper that reaches halfway to my thighs, I do mild makeup with my hair loosely tied into a messy updo.
Sighing, I placed the brush on the table as my eyes fell on the familiar photo frame kept near the edge of the dressing table. My fingers brushed against the glass as I took in the appearance of the figures displayed on the picture. My parents. My father was standing beside my mother with his hands protectively wrapped around her waist. Her silky raven-black hair was braided with a beautiful glow enhancing it. She was wearing a simple knee-length skirt with a tube top along with an embroidered shrug. Her outfit complimented perfectly her dark skin- such a natural beauty. On the other hand, my father was completely opposite- light porcelain skin with dark brown hair. His brown eyes were focused on my mother as she was grinning widely in the picture.
I miss them. They died in an accident when I was just six. Having no other relatives to take up the guardian position, I was raised in an orphanage. I wouldn't say that my life was very hard there, but yeah, it wasn't a bed of roses either.
I blinked my eyes a few times, wiping off the tears. Taking my backpack, I carelessly flung it across my shoulder as the doorbell rang. Looks like Chloe is here. Well, you see, Chloe is my best friend. We have known each other for eight years, and she's one of the few people I usually hang out with.
I shut my door, locking it as I gave Chloe a tight hug. "Chloe, you are late. Where were you?"
"Traffic, You know about the traffic conditions here in L.A. already."
"Okay, let's hurry now, I have Mr. Clark's class from 8."
"He's such a pain in the ass."
"Indeed," I replied as I got into the car to leave for college.
***
The day in college passed in a haze, and currently I'm sitting in the cafeteria with a mug of coffee and a book of symbols I found in the library. Maybe I'll find something about the dagger. A deep rumble escaped my lips as I closed the book. I completed yet another book, but nothing was found. Bending my head down and keeping it against the book, I closed my eyes.
You might be thinking why I didn't try to find the door in my bathroom. Well, I did try it once by cutting my palm and placing the blood on the wall, but nothing came out of it. The door didn't appear.
Maybe I'm thinking too much. Maybe it's just a dream and nothing much. I should just go see a psychiatrist, maybe. Whom am I kidding? You don't see the same nightmare every night for seven years.
Lifting my face up, I rummaged inside my bag as my ears caught the sound of my phone's ringtone. I looked at my screen as the familiar name flashed through it- Maverick Carter, my boyfriend.
"Hey babes, are you home?" he chirped enthusiastically as I picked up the call.
"Not yet. I'm still in the cafeteria". I replied, as I closed the zip of my bag.
"What do you mean? Don't tell me you were trying to find about those dreams again, Erna?" His tone turned flat with a hidden concern lacing his voice.
"I was. I know you told me to stop because it was taking a troll on my mental health and all, but Rick, I just can't help it. Sorry—" I sighed, closing my eyes and softening my voice, "—You do understand nah?"
"I do but truth always comes with consequences, Erna. What if the truth you are seeking, so hard for, isn't what you desired? Would you be able to handle the burden on your shoulders?" His voice rose an octave higher as I bit my lips. "Think about it Erna and you have got a shift in an hour. Just wanted to remind you." he sighed.
"I will, Rick and I'll talk to you when I get back home" I muttered. He ended up the call saying 'I love you'
Maverick loves me a lot, but do I feel the same? I like him, but I'm not sure about the love part. It's funny how a small word of just four letters holds such a big meaning. Maverick used to work in a coffee shop and that's how we met. The memory is still fresh inside my mind.
I strode inside the coffee shop, clutching my purse tightly around my palm. I was completely famished since I hadn't last night and skipped breakfast this morning. Taking a seat beside the window, I folded my legs, resting them completely on the couch. I need to find a better job soon. Working in a library can hardly satisfy my needs.
I kept the purse beside me as a waiter came to take my order.
"The usual, please," I asked, politely, to which the waiter nodded.
I rummaged through my bag, taking out the phone as I began scrolling down my texts. Nothing interesting caught my eyes except the notifications from the various assignments. I sighed, bending and keeping my head down on the table as I heard noises coming from the seat in front of me. I lifted my face a bit as my eyes fell on a very handsome man standing. He was wearing a white shirt with tight fitted black pants- the waiter's outfit. He had dark brown hair curled on the side of his forehead with the most beautiful hazel eyes I've ever seen. Furthermore, he was lean with a muscular built and slightly taller than me.
He seemed to be arguing with the lady who was sitting in front of me.
"Ma'am, this is not a mistake on my side, this is what you ordered," His honey filled voice invaded my ears as I looked at them both in amusement.
"I especially told you to make it black, and what does a black coffee mean? A coffee with no milk, then why do I see this white thing on top?" The girl screeched as another waiter came with my order.
"Hey, can you spare me a minute?" I asked the waiter who came with my order to. He looked at me with confusion plastered on his face. I pointed to the hazel-eye-guy in front of me as I asked, "What's going on there?"
"Oh- that? Well, the poor lad has his first day here and this lady can't just stop arguing over a mug of coffee, ya know?" He replied with a deep Scottish accent coating his words.
I nodded, focusing back on the scene in front of me.
"But Ma'am, this white thing isn't milk but cream," the man replied, running his fingers through his hair.
Poor guy.
"That doesn't matter. I'm lactose intolerant, and you just ruined my coffee," the lady's shrill voice vibrated around the area as I closed my eyes in irritation.
"You didn't mention that, how would I know?" The hazel-eyed-man complained, helplessly.
I looked at the man, sighing as I got up from my seat, making my way towards them.
"Look, lady, it was your mistake that you failed to give him the full information. Working here doesn't give him a mind-reading capacity that allows him to look through your almost non-working mind and know that you are lactose intolerant. Kindly stop blaming him for the mistake you did. Just because he isn't in a position to argue back with you doesn't make you the superior one with power." I lashed out on the lady as she looked at me shocked. Her eyes glared at me angrily as she stomped her foot on the ground and moved out of the shop.
"Thank-you," a soft voice snapped me out of my trance as I turned around to see the man smiling softly at me.
"It's your first day, and you really don't deserve that kind of treatment," I shrugged as a soft grin formed on my lips.
"Maverick," the man extended his palm, which I gracefully took.
"Ernaline,"
After that day, I went to that coffee shop every day to talk to him before he finally asked me out one day. He is one year older than me and is doing his graduation.
Leaving the money on the table, I picked up my purse, carelessly dropping my phone inside it. I should go home. 'Home'. Funny word. I wonder why that tunnel in my nightmare feels more homely than here.
I turned around the door knob, getting inside my home. Flinging the keys inside the drawer beside the door, I made my way to the bedroom. The room was just as I left in the morning. My wet towel was carelessly lying on the arm-chair with empty packets of crisp surrounding it. I really need to stop being lazy. Running my fingers through my hair, I opened my bedroom window to let the fresh air in. I have always loved it here- standing near the window while the wind envelopes my body, my favorite thing. I took a deep breath, sniffing the fresh hair as a faint smell of blood made its way to my nose. Wait- Blood?
I turned around my face, looking for the source of it as the cold wind hit my nerves, a sudden chill vibrating down my spine. I narrowed my eyes towards the side as a bird laid there with its feathers wounded, covered in thick dark red liquid gushing out of it, blood. Slowly tiptoeing towards it, I took in its appearance. It was pure white, a beautiful pigeon. I looked at it for what felt like hours before moving my palms towards it, as the creature flinched a little. A sudden emotion of helplessness and fear creeped through my veins as I stared deep into the pigeon's eye. My hair got blown back as I closed my eyes, resting my palm in the air, an inch above its feather. Even though I didn't know what I was doing, it felt so right, so natural.
I opened my eyes again, a new energy filling me. Boring my eyes into the bird's body, I let a deep black smoke surround my palm. The surrounding air grew thicker as a bolt of energy swept through my veins. I felt lighter and lighter, almost alive at that moment. Slowly removing my palm, I felt the last amount of energy surge inside me.
I looked down at the bird, horrified as something in me snapped. What the-? The sight in front of me made me come back to reality. The bird laid there dead. And I was standing there, close to it. "It was just alive seconds ago. How?" I questioned myself as I stumbled backwards.
What did I do?
***