hey people that like ranboo
this isnt shipping whatsoever
tw for the a/n: abuse
decided to write a vent chapter because my mom yelled at me for literally nothing. Im being verbally abused ☺️. anywaysss sorry for not updating often, i have no motivation. BUT if you join my discord sever you can talk to me. link in bio!
this vent chapter is straight from my heart. I didn't plan to write this week
tw: self harm. suicidal thoughts. very descriptive of everything
___________________________
PSHHHHHHHHHHH
the water goes
PSHHHHHHHHHHH
the blood goes
DRIP
i saw the new and old scars on my arm. the open ones looked bad.
the muscle on my upper arm is ripped and teared. I feel every bit of the throbbing of all my scars.
i've never been clear with scars.
i don't clean them
i don't feel the need to.
the only sanitary measures i take are slightly washing it and even then i sometime don't.
i've always felt unwanted.
I mean, why do i always feel unwanted or not cared for around Tubbo? But when I'm around Tommy he always asks if im okay. He makes me feeling wanted and actually liked and i have a purpose.
Tommy is a good friend.
one of my best friends i would say.
My parents never made me feel that way.
my parents hated me.
just because i was have enderman and half.... uh something else!
they never knew what i was.
They guessed i was a Ghast but they later found out i'm not.
my life has always been shitty.
i've been slitting my wrists and cutting muscle on my arm for around a year now.
at this point i'm just
numb
nothing
i dont feel shit
well i except pain when im cutting my red muscle
i hope no one finds out i do this.
my life would be so much worse if someone walked in on me.
it'd be shit
______________
325 words
hope you enjoyed
-toby :)