The morning sun shone brightly over the vast field of green. You stood at the center of it all, watching Isabel skillfully ride her horse back and forth across the grass.
"I'm surprised," you said, "did someone teach you how to ride a horse?"
"Nah," Isabel said, patting the horse's mane, "but I've always been fond of animals. This guy says he likes me, too!"
You gave the slightest hint of a smile.
"Oh? Interesting."
"Ah!" Isabel grinned at you, "so you can smile! You should smile more often, it suits you."
Isabel pulled on the reins of her horse, taking off again, leaving you alone to ponder and eventually reject the meaning of her words.
You made your way over to where Flagon stood with the brown-haired squad leader, Hange Zoë, assessing the maneuver gear skills of the new recruits.
Levi barely gave you a glance before he took ahold of one of his blades...
...backwards.
"What do you think you're doing?" Flagon asked, his eyes scrutinizing Levi's posture, "those blades weren't designed to be held like that. Do you want to die the moment you step outside of these walls?"
"That might just happen to you," Levi responded, striding confidently towards the forest.
"What did you just say?" Flagon demanded.
"All I have to do is slice the titan's neck, right?" Levi asked, turning around to look at them, "I'll do it my way."
Flagon trembled with anger and began to step forward. You held out a hand to stop him. "Leave him" you ordered.
Somehow, although you hated to admit it, you felt that Levi knew what he was doing.
Levi launched off the ground, twisting and spinning through the air with evident ease and gracefulness.
You arched an eyebrow.
Not bad...
"Was he given formal training?" Hange asked in shock.
"No, I don't believe so," you answered.
"Good. Very good!" Hange said, blushing in excitement, "everything from the way we search for titans to the way we take them down is dependent upon individual methods. He's the perfect example of that! I'll have to observe him carefully," she said, pumping a fist into the air, "wow! This is starting to get interesting!"
You frowned at the uncomfortable feeling in your chest. What was this? Was it something Hange had said? You didn't believe so. Whatever could she have said to bother you?
As you watched Levi utilize his maneuver gear, gracefully flying through trees and avoiding obstacles, you couldn't help but think that the Survey Corps had found an amazing cadet. You stopped yourself. What were you thinking? You thought again of Levi's arrogance and shook your head. How could you be so proud of someone with such low regard for mannerisms?
"(Name). Will you be overseeing the new recruits' physical combat training today?" Hange asked, glancing in your direction.
"Yes," you said, momentarily discarding your thoughts, "though I doubt it will be eventful."
"Make sure to keep everyone in check," Flagon said, watching Levi fly expertly through the forest, "you'll probably need to be more alert."
"Got it" you said. That couldn't be too hard at all.
~•~✾~•~
You watched the recruits fight on the field, your body stiff from having stood for so long. The purpose of this exercise was to test their hand to hand combat skills. Unfortunately, you noted that many weren't taking the exercise seriously.
"Leon," you addressed a member of your squad. The white-blonde haired male glanced at you, as you continued, "watch over the recruits on the left. Be rough with them if necessary."
"What about me?" Charlotte asked. She was a young girl with short blonde pigtails. Though she hadn't been a soldier for long, she was eager to carry out her duties.
"Take the left with Leon," you said, walking over to the recruits on the right.
"C-cr*p! That Squad Leader is watching!" one of the recruits who had been slacking off hissed.
"Seriously?! Pretend you're doing something! Quick!" They scrambled into position, but it was too late.
"I can hear you," you said, walking over.
"Sh*t! U-uh...you see, we—"
"Not interested," you interrupted, snatching the wooden sword from their hands, "show me what you've learned." You lowered yourself into a defensive stance. "Attack."
The recruits looked nervously at each other.
"Both of you."
"A-are you sure? We don't want to injure you."
"Tch," you straightened, "who do you think I am? Some kind of damsel? Hurry up."
They didn't seem to be told twice, seeing as the recruits ran at you before you could get back into a defensive stance.
Oh well.
You kicked one's legs out from under him. You grabbed the other by the shoulders and launched yourself over him, kicking him in the back as you did so.
Then two remained motionless on the ground, groaning in pain.
"If you want to survive, you have to handle at least this much," you said, dropping the wooden sword by their heads, "and if you can't learn the importance of battling someone hand-to-hand like this, don't think you have the liberty to be here."
You walked away, glaring at a few recruits, who averted their eyes and continued their training immediately.
Looking around, you caught sight of Isabel and Farlan engaged in combat...or something that looked like it. You decided to let them off for now. Their skills weren't half decent in your opinion, but at least they were making an effort. You frowned. But where was Levi? They wouldn't go anywhere without him.
That was when you spotted him leaning nonchalantly against the trunk of a tree. He looked uninterested, and a little bored.
You held out your hand to two recruits who stood nearby you. They handed you their wooden sword quickly, stepping back in fear. Without wasting a moment, you launched the weapon towards the tree Levi was leaning against, throwing it with such force that the blade stuck in the tree, a mere inch from Levi's head.
Levi blinked, seeming unaffected, as you walked over to him.
"What exactly do you think you're doing?" you asked quietly.
"It would be a waste of time for me to join this childish fray," he replied.
"Childish...huh?" you repeated.
You glared intensely into each other's eyes for a few moments, the tense silence nearly stifling for those observing the interaction. Without warning, you lunged forward, your fist sinking into the tree trunk where Levi had been standing just a moment before. He had avoided your blow and now stood off to the side.
Some of the recruits nearby jumped at the loud thud of your fist against the bark.
"Hey, hey! There's something going on over there!"
"The Squad Leader doesn't look happy at all."
"Who's that? Isn't that Levi and a squad leader?"
You ignored the other recruits as you drew your hand back and shook it out. Years of harsh self-training kept your knuckles from bleeding after such forceful impact. Your eyes didn't leave Levi's for a moment. You would teach him right here and now why he shouldn't defy orders. You would humiliate him once and for all in front of the other recruits.
"Levi-bro!" Isabel had run up by that time, "what's going on?!"
"Stay out of this," Levi addressed Isabel and Farlan as he crossed his arms.
You yanked the wooden sword out of the tree and threw it to Levi, who caught it with ease. He only had a moment to examine it before you launched yourself at him again. Despite being unprepared for the attack, however, Levi dodged with ease.
"Is dodging all you're capable of?" you taunted.
"I'm not interested in child's play. Besides, in this exercise, I'm on the defensive, am I not?" Levi asked, holding up the wooden sword.
You held back a sharp retort. He had a point.
You leapt forward again, but he continued to dodge your attacks, creating a meaningless back-and-forth dance. You drew back, irked by his formidability as an opponent.
"Instead of running like a coward, why don't you attack me?" you asked, "or did your time as underground scum soften you up?"
You regretted the words the instant they left your mouth. You clearly remembered the dust in the air and the dirt walls and ceilings that enclosed and eventually suffocated you. You inhaled sharply and shook your head lightly. Now wasn't the time to think about the past.
You focused again on the man before you. Now, you realized that your earlier comment had caused Levi's expression to darken. So it had left a significant impact on his life as well.
"Levi!" Farlan warned. He looked at you. "Why would you go and say something like that?"
"Shut up," you ordered, "if you're going to disobey my orders, prove to me that you're capable of dealing with the consequences."
"Fine," Levi flung the wooden sword away. It fell into the trees all the way at the other side of the clearing. There were a few gasps among the recruits as they recoiled, terrified at this display of strength and agility.
"Squad Leader," Leon warned, "please stand down. This is causing quite a commotion."
"It'll be over quickly," you replied without looking at him, "stay back."
Leon did as he was told, rejoining Charlotte, who looked on with a fearful expression. You weren't sure exactly who she was fearful for, you or Levi, but you were fairly confident that it would be the latter.
You flicked your hair over your shoulder. You stepped forward, throwing a punch towards Levi's shoulder. He blocked it with his own arm.
Hah. You fell for it.
You kicked your leg towards his side without warning. Before you knew what happened, he grabbed your leg and began to throw you down towards the ground. You put all your weight into your lower body and flung your legs around his neck. Well, at least they would have wrapped around his neck if he hadn't ducked. You flipped over and landed back on your feet, panting a little.
You observed each other for a few seconds before he stepped forward. You drove your shoulder towards his chest, but he used both of his arms to stop you. Levi stepped back as you lunged forward again. Your legs reached around, trying to kick Levi's feet out from underneath him.
He turned with ease to avoid your trap, but you were ready for him. You leapt upwards, kicking your legs around his neck, but Levi grabbed your ankle and knocked you away. You fell to the ground, springing back up in an instant.
Before you could recover from your momentary fallback, Levi caught your arm and grabbed your shoulder with his other hand, turning you around so your arm was twisted at a painful angle behind your back. You gritted your teeth.
What's with him? I didn't expect him to be this strong!
You twisted and knocked your elbow into his arm. His grip slackened a little bit and you freed yourself of his grasp. Levi gave you a cool look.
"Are you finished yet, brat?"
You didn't respond, but ran forward, locking your arms around his shoulder and back. You put all your weight into throwing yourself forward. Any normal person would have fallen back. You knew that. So why? Why wasn't Levi falling backwards?
Levi grabbed your arm again, but this time, he threw you towards the ground. You fell on your back and he landed on top of you, pinning both of your arms to the sides of your head as he gazed down at you. You attempted to kick him away, but his legs blocked your movement. You struggled for another intake of air as his eyes burned hatefully into yours.
A feeling of familiarity washed over you once more, as if it wasn't the first time you had stared into the gray abyss of his eyes. And for a moment, the thought rang in your mind.
Why does he hate me so much?
Then,
Why do I hate him so much?
You couldn't breathe at the close proximity of his face, barely a few inches away and you could feel his cool, rhythmic breath on your face. You couldn't blink. You remained, frozen, looking up into Levi's eyes.
How is he not tired? What kind of stamina does this person have?
"Are you done?" Levi asked. You didn't answer. The recruits around you held their breaths. Levi leaned in closer.
He was just an inch away now. "I asked you a question, brat."
You shut your eyes tightly and turned your head to face the other direction. This experience brought back unpleasant memories that made your stomach churn.
You vaguely remembered the pressure of much rougher hands pinning you to a wall. The cruel laughter of the three boys you had believed to be family echoed too loudly in your ears.
And...there had been someone else, too. Watching from the shadows for a moment, then disappearing into the darkness.
Who...?
You shifted uncomfortably, still unable to open your eyes. You couldn't look at him. But eventually, you opened your eyes slowly to stare at the grass on your right side.
"S-surrender," you breathed so quietly that only Levi could hear, "so please...get off of me."
Levi didn't need to be told twice. He released you, stood, and began to walk away.
"H-Hey! Levi bro!" Isabel and Farlan raced after him.
You sat up quickly, heat rising to your face. How humiliating! And to think you lost a fight in front of all these cadets...
"H-Hey...did that Squad Leader just...lose?"
"No way..."
"Who is she? Was she recently promoted?"
"Probably. Doesn't seem like she has much experience."
"You're saying too much! She can hear! Shut up!"
"Does this mean no more training?"
"Wasn't she acting all high and mighty earlier—"
You stood and whipped around angrily.
"All of you who just spoke, run laps until sunset," you snarled, "go now."
There were a few groans, but after seeing the livid expression on your face, they complied.
"The rest of you, get back to training. If I see slackers, I'll send them off with the runners."
"Squad Leader (Name)" Leon walked up to you, "are you alright?"
"I'm fine," you shook him off.
You glared at the ground. There was just one question you couldn't answer...
Why had Levi pulled all of his attacks?
Why hadn't he attacked you with his full strength?
Why had you lost when Levi hadn't even used all his strength?
And why had you gotten a flashback of your past during a fight that had no relation?
You touched your arm absentmindedly. Levi had a gentle touch. Even though he pinned your arms down harshly, it hadn't felt that way at all.
You shook your head. What were you thinking?
You looked over to where Isabel and Farlan spoke to Levi in the shadows of the trees nearest to the edge of the clearing.
Who exactly are you, Levi? For what purpose are you here? Why did you walk disrupt my life so suddenly?
And...why...why do you trigger memories of a past I've long since left behind?
~•~✾~•~
My Ice Heart is Yours
Revised, originally published on Deviantart
https://www.deviantart.com/wishbloom-hearts
~•~✾~•~
To be continued...