ーto reflect it all
it's been a crazy journey
so i've been wanting
to reflect for a while now
even to remember
how it started
to what i have now
leaves me with a feeling
of everlasting joy
i remember
how empty i used to be
how empty my life used to be
even when i had had it all
my attitude wouldn't just
let me breathe
my ideals, notions
wouldn't let me be happy
and to know how it took
two new entries
sugar and
heather
to change it all
makes me elated to the core
i wanted to write this
one last time
to say how thankful i am
for everything i have
words of appreciation
i owe to these lads
to jungkook,
thank you for being my first
and dearest friend
you were the first person
to love me
and to embrace me
with all my faults and insecurities
and now that i recall
during those days it were just
your sweater and kindness
that wrapped me in warmth
i am so grateful for your presence
i am so grateful for you
thank you for being my friend
and i hope our friendship always remains.
to heather,
my life hasn't been the same
ever since you've been in it
thank you for considering me a friend
when i was too afraid
it was you who held me together
when my world was shattering
and it was you who taught me love
at the very end
thank you for being this kind to me
i cherish our friendship so much
without you my life
would be just so bland
and thank you for being
in the life of my best friend
now that i see
i cannot imagine a better partner for him
i wish you always stay like this
i wish you stay forever happy
thank you for everything that you've done
just so very effortlessly
thank you for being my friend
i hope we always stay friends like this.
to sugar,
the person who's added colours
to my previously bland life,
thank you so much
for choosing to stay by my side
my words fail to explain
how much i love you
i had no idea you'd be this special to me
when i first met you
you've had the shortest time
as compared to the two of them
yet you seem the closest to me
without any complaints
it was because of you
i learned how to be patient
you taught me it's all worth in the end
you've stayed all this time
you've stayed very loyal
your kindness has changed me completely
your kisses have fed me well
my heart is full of roses
and my body full of warmth
it's just been due to your love
a new me has been born
thank you for bringing this change in me
thank you for loving me till this date
i promise to love you
forever and always.
to me,
thank you for being patient with yourself
take a little break
you've been a bit to harsh on yourself
and now it's your time to embrace
all your insecurities
and your beauty
you deserve the biggest apology
but i am glad you're still here
i am in love with you now,
yes i am talking to myself
the only reason why i am able
to distribute love
is because i practise it myself
i see how this change was brought
slowly and tenderly
but i am glad you're all happy now
just as you deserve it
thank you for being who you are
thank you for being me.
-
[The end of the second journal]