~find beauty in the unseen and forgotten, sometimes we forget little things in life~
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Tw; suicide attempt (You can skip the chapter if you want to, look at the authors note to see what happened)
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The past days were a mess. Talea felt guilty that she burdened the others with her visions. She would spend her days looked away behind the heavy doors of the Room of Requirement, silent tears leaving a black trail on her cheeks, streaming down her face. She spent her days trying to get rid of the empty feeling in her chest, occasionally looking through the schoolwork her cousin would bring her. Sometimes she would take a look at the crystal ball that laid in a corner of the room. She didn't dare touch it anymore, she did once but it only left her with more questions and anger towards her ability.
"Did you do it?" asked a feminine voice.
"Yes" replied the dark-haired boy, leaning his body against a wooden desk. "Alvah, you don't think your parents would mind introducing me to some of their pureblood friends, right?"
The blonde girl tilted her head "No, I don't think so Tom. Tell me, why are you with me? Is it because of me, or because of my powerful family?"
Tom stepped closer to her, grabbing her hands. "Because of you darling, do you really think I would use you for your family?" She frowned and didn't seem very convinced but the slight rising of his voice made her shrink back "No, no I was just asking."
He smirked proudly "There you go, you know that I love you, right?" She looked tired; her eyes seemed to reflect a part of her empty soul. She didn't looked like the first time Talea saw her, she didn't seemed as happy or content. She seemed worn out, empty even. As if her bones were aching, carrying the weight of everything he promised. As if his empty words were heavy.
Who is Alvah? And why is she important enough for Tom to pretend that he loves her, even if he wasn't capable of love? She thought about it over and over again, trying to distract herself from thinking about the incident. She was snapped out of her thoughts when the door opened. She raised her wand but relaxed when she saw Sirius enter.
He walked over to her; it broke his heart seeing her in such state. "Hello, love." He grabbed her hand and sat down next to her, pulling her into his chest. "You have to come out of this room" he kissed her forehead and watched her eyes flicker down to the ground.
"How could I go out of this room, looking into their eyes, knowing that I fucked up. It's probably my fault that they'll hate Peter know, did you saw his face when I told them?!" Tears started to form in her eyes, making her sight blurry " He was so heartbroken, I don't want them to be mad at him, he's good, I know it."
A sob escaped her lips when Sirius pulled her into his chest, brushing his hand through her hair and whispering calming things in her ear. Her hands clutched around his sweater and he placed another kiss on her forehead before pulling her chin up and wiping the tears away. "Shh, calm down. No one is mad at you or Peter. Marlene says that this outburst may have been a good thing because Peter will do his be his best to do the right thing."
A tear rolled down her cheek when she mumbled "Where is he now? Did someone talk to him?" Sirius shook his head "No, he refuses to leave his bed, whenever we talk to him, we get no answer. He's simply staring at the ceiling."
"Can I talk to him?"
Sirius nodded his head "Yeah but I want you to take care of yourself first. You look like you haven't slept in days and I don't think that you've eaten the food Moony and I brought you." His eyes travelled to the full plates that were placed on some table.
She watched his eyes flicker down to hers again and she leaned closer, their lips brushing "I love you so much, do you know that?" He started to grin and pecked her lips before replying "I love you too."
He pulled her up and walked over to a bed that was placed in the middle of the room and laid down next to her, Talea nuzzling into his chest while his arm was around her. "How are the others?"
"I believe that James and Lily are now officially together" she grinned excitedly and he watched her with amusement "Marlene told Dorcas but it seemed like Dumbledore already told them but she's more concerned about you, just like Alice and I believe you know how Remus is doing because he's constantly visiting you. Eloise doesn't know of anything, she's always with us or Cosima and she has asked where you and Peter are." Talea frowned at the name, she was still confused about what the blonde said when she talked to her at New Year's Eve.
"What did you tell her?" asked Talea.
He chuckled "That you were ill, she was worried about you two and Remus had to keep her from bringing you soup." Talea grinned at the thought and snuggled closer to Sirius "What about Reg?"
"He's pissed at James because he told him that he should take a swimming course before going into a cave next time" she let out a sigh at this while Sirius continued "He's doing fine, he even asked if you were okay, I have to admit that I was kind of jealous that he seems to like you more than me."
Talea chuckled and pulled herself up to look into his grey eyes "And how are you?"
"I already knew what you saw, so it was less of a shock for me. I'm just worried about you and Peter." She kissed his lips before laying down again. "I'll talk to Peter tomorrow" she let out a yawn and mumbled "But to be honest, I don't think I'm able to walk out of this room right now." He brushed his hand over her arm, watching as her eyes closed, a small smile gracing her lips and he pulled her closer, kissing the crown of her head.
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She stepped out of the room, the first time in days. Sirius send her an encouraging smile, gripping her hand tight, before they walked down the hallway back to the Gryffindor common room. Talea walked through the portrait hole, hesitating when she heard the chatter of her friends.
Remus was the first who saw, immediately pulling her into an embrace. He ruffled her and whispered "Don't worry Talls, no one is mad at you and I'm sure that Peter will be okay too."
She nodded her head, sending him a small smile and walked up to James and Lily who were sitting on a couch, hand intertwined. Talea grinned and pointed at their hands "Come on, you're telling me that you got together exactly when I disappeared for a few days?!"
Lily blushed slightly while James nodded with a grin "I told you that she's actually madly in love with me." Lily hit him over the head when Talea let out a laugh "Charming."
"Where are Marlene and Alice?"
James pointed at the staircase that led to the girls' dorms. "I believe that Alice is dealing with Marlenes anger issues since she nearly threw a knife at Professor Slughorn when he gave her less points on her essay than Alice. She claims that they did it 'together' and that they have written the same things."
Talea grinned and rushed up the staircase to the dorm, excited to see Marlene furious. "Yes Alice, I know that I copied your work because I was too lazy to do it by myself but that just proves my point! We wrote the same thing; he just hates me!"
Talea opened the door to see Alice leaning onto a bed post, staring amused at Marlene who was angrily pointing at her. Their heads snapped into Talea's direction and Alice ran up to her to engulf her in a hug.
"Talea!" she pulled away, her hands on Talea's shoulders "How are you?"
She smiled slightly and replied "I'm fine, I guess. I'm sorry for telling you all of this-"
Marlene clamped a hand over her mouth "Nope, you don't have to be sorry, to be honest it is for the best. I've never really realised the seriousness of this war before you told us a possible outcome. I know what I have to fight for and I've never been more willing to learn how to defend myself and to fight against them." She took the hand from Talea's mouth and looked at Alice "And I know that the others think so too."
Talea nodded, looking at the ground but was pulled out of her thoughts when Marlene grabbed her hand and pulled her over to her desk, pointing at her essay "Now back to the important stuff. I think I deserve a better grade!" Alice let herself fall onto her bed with a groan.
Everyone was at dinner when Talea decided to pay Peter a visit. She walked up to the staircase that led to the boy's dormitory and knocked at the door- no response. She pushed it open to reveal the messy dorm and walked over to the bed with closed curtains. "Peter? It's me Talea."
No response. She let out a sigh "Listen, no one's mad at you, okay? We know that you won't betray us, we care for you and we love you. If you need help, we're there for you just please speak to me alright?"
Still no response. Talea frowned and decided to push the curtain back slightly. The bed was empty. "Peter?" she looked around the room. She made her way to the bathroom and knocked at the door. "Peter? Are you in there?"
No response.
A circular room flashed in front of her eyes and she grabbed the doorframe. Sadness, guilt, darkness. A hand gripping a railing.
"Shit." No, no, no. She rushed out of the room, running out of the Gryffindor common room. She received questioning glances from people who were already walking back from dinner, back to their common rooms. Her breathing was heavy, the only sound she could make out were her footsteps echoing in the empty corridors.
She rushed up the circular staircase, pushing the door to the Astronomy tower open. "Peter!"
The blonde boy was leaning over the railing, his hands were shaking, his eyes snapped towards her for a brief second before glancing back to the ground. Talea took a step towards him, her hands shaking while tears started to form in her eyes.
"Don't do it Peter" her voice was trembling, she didn't dare come closer.
"I don't want to end up like this. I don't want them to die because of me" a sob escaped his lips. It was just then that she noticed the dark circles under his eyes, how tired he looked. But tired of living? No, she wouldn't let him do it.
"Peter, listen to me. No one is mad at you. I was afraid that they'll be mad at me for telling them what could happen but when Sirius finally pulled me out of the room, I hid in for days they were happy that I've told them. I couldn't believe, I mean why would they be happy?" She took a small step towards him, her hands stretched out.
"But then I saw James and Lily, holding hands, realising that anything could happen these days. Marlene told me that she wants to be prepared because she wants to fight. And look at you, you don't want it, you don't want to be the person that betrayed his friends, you don't want to turn bad. Because you're a good person Peter. You can change the outcome of your future, everything in life starts with your mindset first and your actions second. Your actions follow your mind, your beliefs, your opinion and your thoughts. And if you want to change this possible future, you can. I believe in you, we believe in you.
His hands were still on the railing but his body leaned back, his eyes were fixed on hers. Talea took another step "There are still so many laughs and nights and days, so many stories to reveal and we'll be by your side. James, Remus, Lily, Marlene, Alice, Eloise, Sirius, me... there are so many people that love you, Peter.. You have to believe this. Please."
The distance between them was getting smaller, her hands were still outstretched, he nodded his head shakily, tears streaming down his cheeks. "Now close your eyes and please understand that you're still young, and the universe is endless. And I know Peter, that somehow everything will be okay."
Her hands grabbed his arms softly, and pulled them off the railing, she placed them to his sides and pulled him into a hug. Sobs escaping his lips, his body shacking and his hands gripping the back of her shirt tightly. She held him and tried to give him the comfort he needed. A tear escaped her eyes when she opened them, to see Remus, James and Sirius standing in the doorframe, their eyes blurry. She didn't realise that they were standing there but she didn't care either, all she cared about at the moment was to make the shaking boy in her arms realise that he was loved.
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Authors note (please read if you skipped the chapter):
Some suicide hotlines:
Australia: 1300 659 467
Germany: 0800 111 0 111
Uk: 0800 58 58
USA: 1-800-273-8255
Others: www.suicidestop.com
You are special and I love you and I will love you forever <3
Summary for those who skipped:
Peter tried to take his life but Talea saved him before he could do it. He couldn't bare the thought of betraying his friends and didn't wanted to take any risk to get them in danger. Talea talked to him and stopped his death wish, he'll try his best to be a good person.