I started slamming things around and throwing things in the next room over, letting Ben sleep.
"We never learn, Malachai! We never learn! Weve been here before and I just cant- I cant." I began to sob as I broke down to my knees. Kai stood there and watched, he was thinking about what to say.
"You told me that you had to choose between who you want to be and who you should be, you decided who you should be. So please do me a favor." He said as he went on his knees next to me. He cupped my cheek, making me look up at him as he held my other hand. "Be who you want to be. And if that's with me, then perfect. If it's with him, then I'll leave. I'll let you be happy with him."
My eyes shot up at him in horror. "What? No you cant leave." I said.
"Raya, do you want me to stay, or do you want me to go."
I didnt respond. He stood up and walked towards the bedroom door as I stayed on the floor, he looked back one more time and I still hadn't moved, so he left.
I looked at my hand that he held and felt my cheek he softly pressed his palm on. I didnt want him to leave me but was I really ready for him to be mine, officially? For me to be his?
I raced downstairs panicked, Stefan stood up and stopped me, resting his hands on my shoulders as I looked around clueless for him, for either of them. "Rae, they are gone." He whispered.
"No." I snapped.
"You might have some time but you really need to think, who means what to you? Is Kai a friend or something more than that?"
I looked at the door Kai left wide open, Stefan shook me to get my attention again and my head snapped towards him. "Raya, do you want him to leave or do you want him to stay."
My sight was back on the door within seconds. Then I ran.
It was Kai.
Always was.
"Malachai!" I screamed as I ran into the night.
I couldn't see him, I couldn't hear him. I was petrified as I scream his name into the night.
I lost Damon, there was no way I was going to let Kai slip through my fingers too.
"Kai! Wait!" I tripped on something and started to plummet towards the ground. Then hands caught my forearms as I was on my knees.
I looked up at the man. It was Kai.
I immediately smiled as he stood up. He had a blank expression but I didnt care, I put my hands on each side of his neck as I gazed into his eyes.
"Raya, is everything alright?" He asked as I watched him. I simply nodded.
"Everything is perfect now that your here." I smiled as I pulled on his neck, he instantly understood and pressed his lips on mine. Sending shivers down my spine as he moved his hands from my arms to my waist. He slid his hands under my shirt and gripped my side as we kissed.
He slammed me up against a wall, we were in a forest and yet he found a wall. I pulled away and he started to kiss my neck, I realized we were back at the Salvatores. I put a spell on us and he looked up at me, just to stare.
His cologne overwhelmed me, my legs felt like jelly as he ran us up into his room, he kept his fingers intertwined with mine which kept me steady.
“Please,” I practically whimpered, the heat between my thighs growing with every second that he left me waiting. It took a couple of strides before his body towered over mine.
“What do you want me to do, Princess?” he murmured, his minty breath fanning over my cheeks. It was undeniable that he was just as turned on as I was but it was known to the both of us that he had much more self-control than I did.
“Everything,” I whispered, Kai was more than happy to oblige and before I could say another word his hands rested on my cheeks and his lips attacked mine.
Almost instantly, my hands travelled to the nape of his neck and my finger tugged at the short hairs that lay there. It was only moments until his hands fell from my face with one resting on my waist and the other falling towards my ass.
Whimpers fell from my lips from the evident tension I were feeling, Kai enjoyed torturing me and leaving me writhing whilst awaiting his touch. I endured that all too much through our six months of heaven.
Every time I was intimate with Kai, I felt whole and loved despite the misery he brought about when he teased me. I’d never felt this way with anyone else and it helped me realize that regardless of what he’d done to me, I loved him. And that was the most important realization a person could make.
His hands slipped to my thighs and he effortlessly picked me up, wrapping my legs around his waist with his lips never separating from mine. The strides he took towards the bed did nothing to relieve the ache I felt and bouncing against his increasingly growing bulge only made it worse.
The plush duvet broke my fall as Kai dropped me onto the bed, his form above me in seconds. One hand rested on the bed beside me and the other trailed over my curves before pushing my hair away from my neck.
His lips left wet kisses along my neck and collarbone, my skin getting caught in his teeth before his tongue snaked out to ease any pain. Leaning back slightly, Kai admired his work on my neck.
The warmth of his hand comforted me for a moment until he snaked it around my throat. His metal rings cooled my burning skin but the way his hand tightened around my neck did nothing to help ease the tension between my thighs.
A small whimper fell from my lips and it quickly caught Kai’s attention, his eyes were dark with lust and it took him a mere second to connect his lips with mine.
His hand loosened slightly, his tongue snaking into my mouth as our lips crashed and collided together. The kiss was messy and passionate, moans flew around from the both of us and I couldn’t help the way my hips bucked up.
“Princess, you have no idea what you do to me,” Kai mumbled into my mouth, his hips grinding into mine.
"Then so something about it." I moaned as I ripped his shirt and slid it down his shoulders. I leaned up and kissed his chest, he put one hand on my shoulder and forced myself back as he unbuttoned my own shirt.
He then unzipped himself quickly, pulling himself out of his jeans as I took my jeans off. He pumped himself only a few times, rubbing the bit of cum leaking from around his tip as he prepared himself for me. I watched as he brought himself closer to me. I went to slip off my panties but he ripped them off instead.
"You're glistening, baby." He smirked, using his fingers to slide up my slick folds. I let out a light breath at the action, feeding into my sensitivity.
"All for you." I replied, placing my hands on his biceps as his tip pressed against me. "You know what you do to me." I took my bottom lips in between my teeth, as he slowly pressed into me further.
He stretched me out slowly, my teeth coming down harder on my lip as I hummed out a soft moan from the sensation. My legs hooked around him, and my mouth fell open as he sunk into me deeper. My walls stretched and squeezed around him earning a whimper from his throat. A song of pleasure shot through me at the simple knowledge of knowing that I did that to him.
"God you're so tight." He groaned pulling out only about half way before slipping himself back in.
His hips set a harsh pace, one that I couldn't keep track of. I was pretty sure his vamp strength was playing a factor tonight, but honestly I was probably just that weak. Breathy moans slipped past my lips, Kai's hands holding my legs up on his sides as he fucked into me. My back arched off the bed as he shoved himself deeper.
"Harder, Kai, please." I whined, earning a harder thrust from him that ripped a throaty moan out of me. "Fuck- Kai" I cried out, my head resting on the side of his arm.
"God I love when you say my name." He groaned, hands slipping down my waist to my ass, squeezing me in his hands as he continued fucking into you. "Say it again, slut." He growled, making me smile.
"Kai I-" I whimpered.
"Louder, slut, I don't think everyone in the world can hear you yet." His finger dug tighter into my ass as he picked up speed, I moaned his name louder than the last, a series of curse words flowing out after.
"Kai- fuck- I'm g-gonna- fuck- I'm so close!" I tried to say, my tongue jumbling words because all I could think about was how amazingly well he hit my g-spot every time. It was almost like he was made for me.
Of course he was. And it was embarrassing how long it took me to realize that we were made for each other.
"Oh my- fuck Kai-" I moaned loudly, my legs shook lightly as I came around his cock, he continued to keep fucking into me. My lips pressed into his forearm as I tried to contain the noises. He wasn’t too far behind me.
With one hard thrust his hips drilled and he poured his hot seed into me. I hummed at the warm sensation, as he emptied himself out into me, letting out his own noises that I found so enticing. Both of us were out of breath, I parted my lips with his arm, I hadn't realized I drank from him until I felt his cold blood leave the instant touch to my mouth.
He pulled out of me and laid his hand on my cheek. His thumb grazed my lower lip and he smiled. We were both sweaty and exhausted, but I wanted more. I craved more, and I knew he did too.
"Round two?"
***
The next morning I woke up feeling very lethargic and upset. Very mad at the world, but almost like there was no feeling about anything.
Like I died.
I rolled over to find Kai resting peacefully in bed. We didn't break anything this time. I exhaled quickly through my nose as I got up and out of bed emotionless. I wanted to feel joy and bliss from my night, but I couldn't. My brain and body weren't letting me feel happy.
I started to listen around as I put a pair of Kais joggers on along with one of his shirts. Everyone was looking for me, even Bonnie.
How odd.
As I made my way towards the door I started to feel like I was going to cry. I didn't know why, but I felt very sad all of the sudden.
I walked out of the room trying to leave Kai unharmed. I walked downstairs and I could feel the spell I put from last night had disappeared.
I was completely blank as they all stared at me. All of them were blank too. Like they were staring at a ghost.
"What." I snapped as I continued walking down the stairs. Caroline exchanged a look with Stefan, he shook his head and she rubbed it off.
"Honey, why dont you come sit down." She instructed me, gesturing to the couch.
"Why? I want to see Ben, I didnt get to see him because those vampires took me and when I did get home he was asleep." Ben will definitely get me out of this unexpected mood I had. I heard Kai trot down the stairs as he finished putting on a shirt. I turned and smiled at him, but it quickly faded. I didnt want it to. I wanted to kiss him and tell him how happy I was about our amazing night. But i couldn't.
"What's going on? Is everything alright?" He asked standing next to me. Stefan gave him a look and Kai froze. I could feel his fear, it was projecting off of him.
"Can we talk about all of this later? Whatever Damon gas screwed up now cam wait at least five minutes while I see my son, can it not?" I blurted. Caroline started to hesitate and Stefan was acting weird. Then I noticed Kai tense up and I looked over at him.
His fists were clenched and he started to fume. His face was red and his breathing along with his heart rate picked up.
"He didn't..." Kai mumbled. Caroline looked up at him broken and her eyes watered. She nodded. "That's why shes acting like shes..." He didn't finish. I couldn't force myself to care about his worries.
"What the fuck is everyone talking about?" I asked getting agitated. Kai grabbed my hand and forcefully pulled me to the couch with him. He placed his hand on my cheek as I stayed perfectly still.
"Raya, how do you feel?"
"I don't know, off I suppose. Why."
"In exact words, how would you describe it?" He was calm. Everything was yelling at me to yell at him but the way his thumb stroked my cheek soothed me through my anger.
"Upset. I feel like crying, like really crying. I feel numb for no certain reason, like nothing can soothe me. I feel very moody and confused." I said with a harsh tone, letting my body be mean to him but not letting it have its way.
"So to sum it all up, you feel dead. More than you should?" He was still calm, this time he spoke in a whisper.
"Yeah, that's a good word for it." I said with a sigh as I pulled away. He stood up and ran his finger through his hair, he was panicked. It showed all over his face.
I looked over at Caroline to see her chewing her thumb nail as Stefan paced. Bonnie didnt speak as she stood behind everyone.
"Malachai." I spoke harshly, he snapped his head in my direction as he tried to calm himself. "What happened? Is something wrong with Ben?" I asked on the verge of crying. I dont know why I wanted to cry, my eyes started to tear up just asking.
Kai nervously sat down again and held my hands in my lap. Tears rolled down my cheeks, he choose to ignore them.
"Yeah." He whispered to me.
My eyes shot wide as he spoke, his eyes started to water themselves.
"Hes dead. Damon killed him."