Cody hands me a red cup and I'm surprised that red cups are at every party even on the beach in the middle of nowhere.
The sky starts to get darker and it's getting kind of cold and the breeze from the ocean that was so nice is now icy and freezing everything in t's path including me.
"Wait." Rebecca squeaks as she looks at Cody who's minding his own business and sitting down next to me on the spot he was at before Rebecca came.
I glance over at Stephanie and Elijah who are more than comfortable with each other, holding and giving each other kisses which only makes me think of Miles; everything makes me think of him.
"Didn't you say you were back together with Miles?" Rebecca's squealing voice is sharp in my ear as she leans over to take a better look at Cody who's in front of both of us. His eyes turn sharp and his gaze intensifies into my eyes.
He looks confused, hurt even as if he didn't expect Miles and me to be together again at all. The last time he even heard that name was probably at his dorm where I mentioned that we had broken up.
"W . . . what?" he turns to Rebecca and so do I, only to see the evil in her eyes and the playfulness in he lips.
"I'm sorry, Madison." She says to my surprise.
"I didn't know that Cody and you were fliting or anything." She adds and I frown.
"We're not flirting, I—" I begin.
"Aren't we though?" Cody jumps into my words and we both gaze at each other's eyes.
"I thought we had something there, I mean, you laughed at all my jokes, you told me about your ex . . . but he's not your ex, is he?" Cody's eyebrows furrow and I find myself at a loss for words.
"I . . . he was, but we got to back together recently," I say guiltily, even though I shouldn't be, should I?
"Sure," Cody says, putting his hands into his pockets.
"Do you want me to chase after you or something?" He spits.
"Chase after me?" I shake my head.
"I—" Rebecca jumps in and completely stops my words to say her own.
"Oh don't worry, they're doing long distance . . ." She says and then whispers the rest, "Miles doesn't do long distance." My heart drops at the words, everyone's saying that but I know he does, he wouldn't just break up with me, he wouldn't give up, it will work.
I know it will, I have to. I don't know what to say all I can do is look at the hurt inside Cody's eyes as it looks back at me.
I part my lips but before I can say anything, or think of anything to say, I feel something ice-cold drip into my shirt and then lie a wave, it crashes all over me. I qucikly stand up, in panic, unsure of what's happening but when I look down I know just what happened.
"Whoops, I'm sorry," Rebecca says nonchalantly as she tips her bottle to show me that every single drop spilled onto my shirt. Cody eyes the situation but he doesn't look angry or as hurt as I am. I know that if Miles was here, he'd yell at Rebecca and protect me at all costs, he wouldn't sit there, watching it all.
"Oh, sorry." Cody shakes his head.
"Uh, here. Take this." He fumbles, taking off his brown leather jacket and offering it to me. I doesn't smell like Miles and it doesn't feel as good as Miles's clothes but I offer Cody a kind smile anyway and put the coat on.
"I'll drive you home?" Cody asks and I nod, ignoring Rebecca completely as her eyes burn a hole into us.
THE AWKWARD AND BUMPY DRIVE finally leads to a stop but we're not in front of WSU, in fact, it's almost as if we couldn't be further from it. I can't help but let my mind wander with images of Cody hurting me in some way considering what I went through with Hayden but I try to force those thoughts out and instead I look at him, my eyes curious and full of wonder at the situation.
"I could have driven you home . . . but, uh, I figured if you wanted . . . if you want to, that is, we can have a nightcap." Cody smiles before continuing, "I have a small bar at my house, maybe we can just hang out and if not, that's totally cool.
I'll drive you home and we'll pretend we're strangers the next morning. Just thought I'd drive here so that the decision would hopefully be easier." Cody says with a wide smile and I can't help but giggle and then bite my lip to stop the sound.
I look into his soft green eyes for what feels like a very long second until I finally nod and Cody flashes me an even bigger smile.
He unhooks his seatbelt and I do the same with mine before stepping out of the car with the door already open and waiting for me with Cody there to smile at me. we walk slowly on the crunching and dry oak beneath us and then I hear rattling from Cody's keys as he tries to open the door.
"Do you live here?" I ask and he nods.
"Yeah, I haven't exactly fixed it up perfectly or anything and now that the dorms opened up, I finally shot my shot and join in, even though I have this baby up here waiting for me." He explains and I give him a small nod.
He finally opens the door and my eyes instantly shoot to the cow rug next to the couch that's beside us. The whole inside is decorated in a wooden style, even the loft holds wood that hangs above us.
"Can I get you a drink?" He asks and then scrunches his nose as if realizing something embarrassing.
"Or let me rather get you a towel or something." He says and I smile with a nod.
"Yeah, that would probably be better," I tell him as I follow him to the small bathroom, hidden behind the living room wall at the very end of the hall.
"Freshen up all you like." She smiles and so do I before entering the small bathroom and locking myself in. I take a deep breath and move away from the hair that's now clinging to the wood-like buttons on my cardigan.
I wet the white towel Cody placed on the sink for me and stroke it across my chest and I can't help but think of Miles while the soft material touches me, it's like his touch, so soft.
I stroke away all of the beer, take off my cardigan and try to clean whatever disgusting smell is tiring to linger in my cardigan.
"You okay?" I hear a small and light knock on the door, I nod to myself in the mirror until I realize that Cody can't see me.
"Yeah," I say through the door before quickly getting back into the now hopefully clean cardigan and stepping outside. I give Cody another small smile and he returns it with an even bigger one.
"Want to sit on the couch?" he asks and I can't help but giggle at the awkwardness floating around us, at first I thought I was the only one feeling this way but with Cody's short sentences, I know he is too.
I don't really know what I'm doing in his house all I know is that I feel alone and I need Miles and since I don't have Miles, I might as well make friends, he is, after all, Jace's roommate and I know he's going to respect that I'm still in a relationship with Miles, especially now that he knows.
"I know I'm super lame, couches aren't really it today are they?" He asks and I giggle even more, but quickly cover my mouth.
"I don't think they are." I can't help but say, joining his joke. He sits down on the couch and I follow, sitting by his right side, against the edge of the couch, my back pressing against the end.
"So uh . . ." He looks into my eyes but doesn't finish the sentence and instead grabs his phone; the one that's on the brown glass coffee table on top of the cow rug that creeps me out a little.
"How about this? Am I doing this right?" He asks, turning off the lights around us with one switch on his phone.
Shivers run through me and I feel slightly uneasy that I'm not with Miles and that I'm with Cody instead; someone I don't know; someone I don't like. He places his hand on my left and I instantly flinch away, what am I doing here?
"Oh, shit, sorry." He qucikly takes his hand away and I can tell that he doesn't want to make me uncomfortable, his eyes are so true, so pure, and so telling; telling me that he's being honest.
"I'm sorry, Madison." He says as if he can read my mind and I give him a small smile, brushing everything off.
I don't have to feel this way, Miles doesn't have to be the only company I feel safe and okay with. Cody leans closer, his eyes pouring into mine, they're a soft green. I feel something stabbing itself into my stomach and I qucikly remember that it's my phone which reminds me that I see Miles's name there in the car but couldn't read the message. I quickly turn on the screen, feeling Cody's eyes on mine.
Miles: "We need to talk."
Long-distance really doesn't work. I close my phone, biting my lip and trying not to let the tears spill. I look at Cody who's right in front of me to meet his intensive stare.
"We don't have to do anything, but if you, uh, do want to try and forget him, then I, um, I can show you something that I can give you." He says while staring intensively at my lips.
He slowly leans closer and so do I, my eyes close and all I can do is picture Miles, his lips, the way they're so soft, so perfect on mine but before I can feel them on mine, I wake up, realizing that this isn't Miles, it's Cody, and as a reflex, my hand flies over to Cody's cheek.