He sat silent in the audience. He watched as he realised he had made the biggest mistake of his life
***
"I don't know lads, I feel like it'd be a bit weird ya know?"
Simon was sceptical. He was offered a ticket to come see the new Cinderella musical on the West end.
And while a few months ago, he was confident he was going. Now, he was not so sure.
This event had been on his calendar since early productions, but what he didn't count on, was him and his girlfriend, who was playing the lead, breaking up 3 months before the show.
"Come on Simon, I'm sure Amy would want you there"
Harry tried to reassure him. Simon sighed, looking down at his hands.
"She probably hates me"
He grimaced. His eyebrows were scrunched in.
Amy and Simon had met while the two were in collage. Simon taking Criminology and Amy taking Performing Arts.
It was clear to Simon that drama was her passion. She could talk for hours about what musicals she was dying to be in, or what she would sing if she ever went on a talent show.
Amy's voice was angelic. You wouldn't be able to tell however. She rarely showed off her voice, only when she was involved with productions or possibly singing in the shower.
Simon can remember the first time he heard her sing.
꧁꧂
She was sat in the collage cafeteria, quietly singing to herself.
She had no idea that she was being admired by a boy a few seats down.
She sung 'You are beautiful' while reading her book, her hair adorably falling in her face.
His friends at the time noticed his distracted state, panning their eyes over to where he was looking.
"Stop eye fucking her Jesus"
Simon scoffed, turning back to his mate and smacking him across the arm.
"I'm not"
They all rolled their eyes, pulling a 'yeah right' Face.
"If you fancy her, go talk to her"
Simon bit his lip, shaking his head.
"No way"
He stressed, playing with his fingers. The boys pushed him up off of his seat, making him fall slightly. Luckily, she didn't see this. This earned the boys a scowled look from the boy.
He took a deep breath in, and began his walk towards the girl. She continued her quiet singing, suddenly being tapped on the shoulder.
She jumped a little, looking up to meet eyes with a rather handsome boy.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you"
He chuckled, she blushed and grinned.
"It's okay. Did you want anything?"
He cleared his throat, scratching the back of his neck.
"Yea uh, I heard you singing. I thought you were really good"
She widened her eyes, going twice as red.
"Could you hear me? Sorry I wasn't too loud was I?"
He chuckled and smiled, shaking his head.
"Could I uh-"
He stuttered, trying his best to form an actual sentence.
"Could I get your number"
She pressed her lips together in a smile, sheepishly nodding her head. The first time she gets asked for her number, it's by someone exactly her type.
Tall, lean, blonde and striking eyes.
After their initial meeting, they went on their first date. At no point was there an awkward silence.
The two's conversation flowed easily. Their smiles were as wide as ever and there eyes remained on the person in front of them.
It was an instant attraction for the two. He loved listening to her talk about how much drama meant to her, and how she began singing.
And she loved listening to him talk about his family and his friends, and that he was thinking about dropping out to per-sue a new kind of job.
A YouTuber?
Or something like that, she wasn't sure. She didn't get it 100%, but he sounded like he enjoyed it so that was all that mattered.
Swiftly after the first date, came the second, and the third. But it was only after the fourth, did Simon finally grow the balls to ask her to be his girlfriend.
The answer was yes, and the two became closer than ever. Meeting his friends, meeting her friends, meeting each other's families.
It became a serious relationship very quickly, and the two were having the time of their lives.
After a year of them dating, Simon dropped out of collage, finally treating YouTube as if it was his full time job. And Amy was nothing but supportive, which he immensely appreciated.
She graduated her theatre degree, her teachers recommending her to many future employees.
While Simon's YouTube channel was growing, Amy was slowly loosing hope. Her agent was lazy, never letting her know about auditions until they were too far gone.
Simon could see her frustration, which intern made him frustrated. He knew how much she had dreamed about being on the stage, and her agent clearly wasn't helping her.
He can recall many phone calls between him and her agent. Him shouting at the women, letting her know how useless she was. Amy would calm him down, hugging him tightly and kissing his cheek softly, which always worked.
"Don't worry Simon, things will turn out okay"
She would tell him. Even though he was at the best point in his life, dream job, dream house, dream girlfriend.
The idea of his girlfriend being sad, made everything else seem like nothing.
"I just hate seeing you upset when it's not your fault. I just don't understand, are people deaf and blind? You're literally the most talented gorgeous person in the world"
She smiled, blushing a deep shade of rouge. She gave him a small peck, his heart full words making her feel instantly better.
"I'm sure something will pop up eventually"
Those were the words she seemed to be always saying.
Simon's subscribers were constantly growing, while Amy's opportunities were dwindling. Everything that her past teachers said as she was graduating, seemed to go to shit.
She left being told that the employees would be lining up, hoping to cast her in their next show.
But nothing was happening.
No calls, no offers. Nothing.
And this was Amy's downfall.
Her voice was going to waste, people only hearing it when they weren't meant to.
Simon did his best to comfort her, the whole ordeal breaking his heart. His job was bringing in stacks, while she earned hardly anything, having to take up a job in a card shop.
She wasn't happy. Singing was the last thing she wanted to do. Which sucked for everyone else including her. Everyone in their group loved her voice, a proper Broadway voice.
But now she hardly ever sang.
Too depressed to carry on doing something that was supposed to bring her her dreams.
Until one day at a local coffee shop.
Simon was at a shoot, so Amy decided she would get all the boys drinks. While waiting for her orders, she sang along to the song playing through the speakers.
Catching the attention of a women stood next to her, also waiting for her drink.
"Excuse me, may I say you have a lovely voice"
She turned to her left, a women, maybe in her 50s stood smiling.
"Thank you"
She chuckled slightly awkwardly.
"I'll tell you, my husband is looking for a girl to play Cinderella in his new show for the west end. I'm sure with a voice like yours, you'd be in for a chance"
She was about to say no, but she was always taught by the people around her, to never waste an opportunity like this, nodding her head and taking a flier from the women.
"Good luck"
She said before taking her called order and leaving the cafe.
Amy stared at the flier.
Auditions Friday, Saturday and Sunday.
She would have a few days to pick a song and practice.
The audition took place, and from what she could tell, it went pretty well.
At this point, she had yet to inform Simon of the whole ordeal. He was stressed about work and the last thing she wanted was for him to spend his time worrying for her.
She told herself that she would only ever tell him if the audition went well.
Which it did.
When she got the call that the part was hers if she wanted it, she couldn't believe her luck.
After years of nothing, everything was knocking at her door. The tears were flowing while she was on the phone. She hadn't felt this euphoric in a long time. It was also the perfect time for a certain Mr Minter to walk through the door.
She put the phone down, to be welcomed with a worrying voice.
"Oh god what's wrong?"
He kneeled in front of her, grabbing her hands. She shook her head, a gaping smile seeping through her tears.
"I've got a job"
She whispered, it needing to be repeated for the boy.
"Sorry Babe, say that again?"
She chuckled, looking him deep in the eyes.
"I've got a job. I auditioned for the west end last week, they just called and said that I got the part"
She stood up, squealing in excitement. Simon's smile grew wide, incredibly excited for his beloved girlfriend. He picked her up, spinning her around.
"I'm so proud of you"
She sobbed happily into his shoulder. His grip was tight around her waist, never wanting to let her go.
"I better have front row seats"
"Oh definitely"
In the following weeks, she started rehearsals. Her schedule quickly became busy, a massive change from her previous lifestyle.
It was a lot of her just staying in Simons room or working at the card shop. But now, it was rehearsal, rehearsal, rehearsal.
While Simon loved that Amy was now living her dream job, seeing her became far and few in between.
She had initially warned him that she would be away a lot, which is something Simon thought he would be able to cope with. But truthfully he couldn't.
He struggled sleeping. His usual sleeping position would be her deep within his arms, snuggling into his neck. Now it was just an empty space.
He tried not to complain, he didn't want to make things any harder for her. She would come home, immediately heading to bed because she was shattered and he knew starting an argument would be a bad move.
But his selfish side wanted her all to himself, despite the fact that she was chasing her dreams.
But he can recall the argument that stoped their relationship in its tracks.
As usual, Amy came home tired and worked. She opened the door to his room, giving him a sweet kiss on the lips and making her way to the bathroom for a shower.
He mapped out what he was going to say, and waited anxiously for for her to come out of the shower.
He heard the door opening, taking a deep breath in and turning back to her.
"Babe?"
He called, she smiled at him and yawned.
"Can we talk?"
She nodded her head, clueless to what he wanted to talk about.
"I just, I guess I'm feeling a little lonely recently. Ya know, since you've been working on the show"
She pulled a sad face, grabbing ahold of his shoulders.
"I'm sorry you feel like that Simon, but you know why I can't be around that much right now"
He sighed, looking down.
"I know that Am's, but you're either there or asleep. We haven't spent proper time together in ages"
She steps back a little, straightening out her hoodie a little.
"Simon I told you that things were going to be a bit weird for a while"
She crossed her arms, not quite angry yet.
"Yeah I know, but all I'm asking for is one day at least. Is that hard enough to ask?"
She raised her eyebrows, shocked by her boyfriends selfishness. This is when the pointing fingers came out.
"I sat there-"
She pointed at his bed.
"While you filmed videos, streamed, practically ignored me for over 2 years. And I never once, made you feel bad about it, because I knew that doing YouTube was your job and you couldn't help it"
She let it all out. Simon stood silent, taking in everything she was saying, knowing deep down she was right.
"Look, I get that Amy but-"
"No! No you don't get anything. This is my job Simon. My first proper job in god knows how long. Why can't you just support me?"
He tried to think of something to say, but nothing was coming to his head, he was made speechless by his girlfriends truthful words.
"Forget it Simon. If you can't handle a few months, then that's your problem"
She walked towards her rucksack, packing anything that was hers in sight, ignoring Simons pleas to stay.
She headed towards the door.
"Where are you going?"
"I'm going to my friends, don't come after me"
She slammed the door behind her, tears forming in her eyes. She walked passed JJ who was sat on the sofa watching tv.
"Hey, Amy are you okay?"
She turned to him from the front door.
"Ask Simon"
Those were the last words she spoke in that house up until this point.
For the next couple of weeks, she tried to throw herself into her work. Spending extra time at rehearsals, helping out whoever she could. Any chance to avoid her phone. Which was blasting with messages from Simon.
Si💖: Please Amy, talk to me.
Si💖: I understand why you are upset, I promise I'll be different.
Si💖: I love you please talk to me.
Si💖: You're my world I was just missing you. I won't complain ever again.
But she never answered, simply left them on read.
꧁꧂
"Come on Simon, you've had these tickets for months"
Freya told him. Everyone was putting their jackets on, ready to set off and see the show. He sat on the edge of the sofa, staring down at the ticket that had been reserved especially for him since day one.
Since the two were still together.
He sighed, getting to his feet and making his way to the car, going to the show where he knew someone he loved was going to be there.
The car ride was silent, a part from the music of the radio playing softly in the background. He battled with the idea of finding her after the show, pour his heart out and let her know how sorry he was, deciding that this was his only chance.
They arrived at the theatre, quickly entering the packed hall and finding their seats.
Simon was anxious, fiddling with his fingers and moving around in his seat. JJ put a comforting hand on his shoulder as the lights when down.
"Oh god here we go"
Simon whispered, a mixed feeling of nerves and excitement filling her.
He sat through 5 minutes, before the love of his life came on stage. He smiled, seeing how much she came alive when she was on stage, something he hadn't seen since collage.
The show continued, but all Simon was looking at was the gorgeous girl who used to be his.
It finally came to the song she had been humming since the beginning of rehearsals. Simon had asked for her to sing it to him a few times, always refusing to because she wanted him to hear it for the first time on the night.
Thought I was too smart for this
Not a sucker for a kiss
Turned my back to the wall
I was protected
The song started off soft, her face one of melancholy. Simon could already feel the tears forming in his eyes.
I was so not naive
With no heart on my sleeve
Always walked out before
I was rejected
Simon turned to his friends, all of them smiling. Eyes full of pride. He was jealous of the fact that they could just sit there and enjoy the show.
Fairytales are not to be believed
I blame myself if I have been deceived
4 months into their relationship, the two were layed out on the grass in a park near their collage. The sun was setting and the sky was a dusty pink colour.
"I never believed in fairytales, but I think I do now"
She admitted, making Simon smile and turn to her, giving her a sweet kiss to the side of her head.
I was fine on my own
Made of steel, hard as stone
I know I have a heart because you broke it
This is where her singing skills really came into play, projecting to the entire audience. Freya couldn't contain her smile. Even though it was a sad part of the show, she was so proud of how far she had come.
But to the side of her, Simon sat there silently sobbing to himself. He felt like the lyrics were meant for him, hitting him deeper than it did for anyone else.
I was so unaware
That I could fall so hard
But what good is a heart
If you don't care?
"It's insane how quickly I've fallen in love with you"
Amy told Simon only 7 months after they initially started dating.
Simon shook his head at her words that she had sung. He did care, he cared too much. And that was his problem.
Like a damsel in distress
In a torn party dress
Someone I never met
I was pretending
She was stood on the edge of the stage, pointing to herself and staring into the crowd that had all payed to see her.
Should have known all along
That I need to be strong
For a girl who's like me
There's no happy ending
Simon assumed when they became boyfriend and girlfriend, that this was it. She was the one. And he still believes it to this day, as he's watching her sing about heartbreak.
I was not a hard one to convince
Girls like me don't end up with a prince.
Found out love is a hoax
One of life's little jokes
I know I have a heart because you broke it
And it's shattered and bruised
And now the laugh's on me
Anyone want a heart that's barely used?
Her heart had been thoroughly taken up by Simon. For many years. Simon was her first heart break.
Whenever her friends would come crying to her, sad over their recent breakups, she would be internally happy that she would never have to go through that, until she became that crying friend.
Fairytales are not to be believed
I blame myself if I have been deceived
Her eyes scanned the audience, spotting Vikk. Soon, her eyes landing on another Sidemen. Her favourite Sidemen. Who coincidentally, also happened to be the person who had clogged her mind for the longest of times.
Soon came the bridge of the song, the most emotional part. And after seeing Simon, that was the push she needed to belt the last chorus out.
I was fine on my own
Made of steel, hard as stone
I know I have heart a because you broke it
She looked at Simon, straight in his eyes. She couldn't pull them away. She didn't want to.
I was so unaware
That I could feel so bad
But what good is a heart
If you're not there?
Now I won't need a heart
'Cause I don't care
The sound of the audience clapping and cheering at the end of the song became drowned out. All she could hear was the drumming of her heartbeat, pumping at the same speed it would after a run.
Simon stood up, clapping and whiping away his tears that were free flowing. She frowned, trying to hold in any that might ruin the makeup she was wearing.
The stage went black, it now being the interval.
"How're you feeling mate?"
Simon sunk back in his seat, shrugging her shoulders.
"I love her, and she's probably moved on"
"I don't think she has"
Freya said before getting to her feet and heading to the ladies.
The second half was like a blur. It was a lot of Simon admiring the beauty of his former girlfriend, turning his head whenever she had a romantic scene with the guy playing the prince and wiping away any stray tears that had fallen.
The curtains pulled for the final time, the theatre erupting in applause. People were whistling, 'wooing' and getting to their feet.
It was amazing.
A reaction Simon knew Amy craved for. Something she undoubtedly deserved. Every hour she put in for this show, it being her first as well.
He could just imagine the grin she would have on her face right now. Matching it almost completely to the one that wore his face.
She sat in her dressing room with Glee written on her forehead.
After about half an hour of cooling off in her dressing room, there was knock on the door.
"Come in!"
She shouted, expecting it to be either one of her fellow actors or a member of the crew. Instead, the tall blonde that inhabited her dreams.
"Simon?"
She got up, standing awkwardly next to her chair.
"Hi...you were amazing out there"
He smiled, putting his hands behind his back. She blushed.
"Thank you, glad you enjoyed"
He nodded, stepping a little closer.
"Look Amy, I'm sorry about everything I've said. I was being a selfish prick and not respecting you like you did for me when my schedule was difficult"
He spoke. Amy just stood there, letting him continue.
"If you don't forgive me, I completely understand. But I love you, and I just can't throw away 8 years of my life"
He gently held her hands, peering into her large chocolate brown eyes. Just as she was going to respond, the door burst open. The set designer.
"Quick Amy, Mark wants everyone on the stage now"
Mark was the director, someone Amy owed everything to. She threw an apologetic look to Simon, which he nodded his head respectively and let her go.
"Text me"
He told her, before she was dragged away from him.
Later that night, Simon was lying down, ready to go the sleep with a smile on his face. When his phone dinged.
Amy🎤♥️: I love you too
That night, the two fell asleep on the phone, finally falling back into the relationship that really defined them as people.
The Thespian and the Youtuber.
***
Thanks for reading lads 🙌
I'm sorry for the somewhat long time since my last post, but my GCSE's are kicking in and I've had no time to be an actual human.
I've only recently found 'I have a heart' (I put it in the media of ya want to listen to it) and I seriously recommend it, it's such a beautiful song.
Anywho, thanks for 16k readers, means so so so so so fricking much. Love you all 💖
Upvote because musical theatre is the reason I still function as a member of society.
That's all for now.
Bye-bye
🤙💛Xx