11
“What time is it?” Is the first thing that I think as I become conscious.
I slowly lower the blankets from over top of my head, and quickly yank them right back up again as I am blinded by the sunlight streaming through my windows. Even with the blankets blocking my eyes from the light, the few seconds it was in my line of vision caused a blinding shade of red to imprint itself on the insides of my eyelids.
Bravely, I lower the blankets once again from over my head and sit up, ignoring the mental screams of protest coming from my head. Standing up, I hold my arms out in front of me with my eyes squeezed tightly shut, and wander blindly towards the window area. As soon as my outstretched fingers brush against the fabric of the curtains, I yank them closed and sigh in relief.
Returning to my bed, I plop myself down cross legged and rest my head in my hands. What am I going to do? I'm sitting in my room, hiding from light after having slept away most of the day, and contemplating sleeping through the rest of it.
I decide to suck it up and face the daylight, and getting off the bed and making my way over to the door, I rub my eyes in preparation for the attack they are about to endure. When I open them I come face to face with a monster.
"AGHHHH!!!" I stumble backwards and fall on my butt unceremoniously at the sight.
Just kidding... It wasn't a monster. It was just my reflection. But seriously. I look like crap right now. The monster reaction wasn't that far off, with my hair sticking up every which way, what's left of my makeup is smudged and I'm dressed like a hobo: the perfect morning ensemble.
Not bothering too much with my appearance, I just tie my hair up into a messy bun, wipe the makeup off and wriggle into a pair of sweatpants and a hoodie, ditching my pajamas in the corner of the room.
I'm not even going to bother putting on any makeup. Usually, I'm the kind of girl who puts on makeup no matter what. It really pisses me off when girls don't wear any makeup when they are having a bad day, just so people will notice how crappy they look and feel sorry for them. But me, I believe that some good makeup can fix anything, at least on the outside, and that looking good can make you feel better. However, today, I'm just feeling all round horrible, and no amount of makeup can make me feel better, so I'm just not going to bother.
Similar to on New Year's, as I descend the staircase, I hear voices coming from the dining room. As that is where everyone is, my feet carry me in that direction, bringing me to face everyone sitting at the table, eating. As I stumble into the room, everyone looks up from their plates, and their heads snap to look at me, everyone, except James and Ash, who are staring at Ash's plate.
Ash picks up his fork and looks intently at his food, and rearranges it to form pictures.
"What's that shape, there?" asks James, pointing at a particular area of the food. "Because it looks kind of like a d-"
"Ahem."
James is cut short by a cough from his dad, alerting him to my presence and causing both him and Ash to look up from their game.
"Still playing with your food, I see, James," I tease halfheartedly.
He shoots me a glare and sticks his tongue out at me.
"So, I see someone finally decided to join us," Uncle Liam remarks while reaching across the table for the bowl of sugar.
"Have a good night?" Laura asks slyly from the door to the kitchen.
"I bet you had an awful night," James says. “All alone, without me to-”
“Ahem,” Liam interrupts again.
“Without me to scare away the big bad monsters,” James finishes with a pointed look at his dad.
"Oh shut up," I retort.
"Awesome comeback. It seems that your sleep hazed mind is playing keep away with what minuscule amount of intelligence you possess."
"By the way," he adds, "may I just say that you look like complete shit."
Scowling, I pull out a chair from around the table and plop down on the seat, pouting.
"What is this," I complain, "your annual 'Pick-on-London Meeting'?"
James points his finger at me and rolls his eyes.
"Actually, it's biannual, and no, this is not that meeting. Although, I do always love picking on you, so I may have to consider holding that meeting more frequently."
"Oh don't listen to him," Liam says and pushes the jug of orange juice towards me. "Here you go, have some orange juice.”
I smile gratefully at him and pour myself a glass, and James beams at me, apparently a side effect of our newfound friendship.
I scowl at him and he just chuckles. The jackapple acts like it’s a great thing that I am functioning like a zombie this morning.
Liam says, "I heard you two up really late last night. What were you doing?"
"Well," James begins, "we had a heart to heart chat, resolved some deep buried issues, and long story short, the wedding is on Sunday.”
"Can I be the best man?" Ash asks. "Please tell me I can be the best man. God knows London needs me to liven up her wedding day. I put the ‘AYYYY’ into ‘PARTAY’!" he cheers.
James laughs and pats Ash on the back. “Dude,” he says, “you’re the flower girl.”
“YES!!!” Ash shouts out. “MY DREAM COME TRUE!!!”
Everyone laughs and I slap James on the arm. “Even if there is a wedding on Sunday, good luck getting your bride to show up. Your computer doesn’t love you that much.”
Everyone laughs again and I decide to have a little fun.
“Hey, James,” I say, “truth or dare?”
James squirms in his seat a bit uncomfortably and Ash begins to look a little concerned.
“Dare,” he says confidently, “ because I’m not a wuss. Only girls pick truth.”
By now, Ash has scooted his chair further away from James, and is making a positively horrified face.
“What?” James asks confusedly after noticing Ash.
"Dude, I thought you were better than that! I thought you had some self-respect! Truth or Dare?! Hell, I'm pretty sure it's somewhere in the guy code where guys should never play Truth or Dare unless they want to be rejected by their own kind!"
James just ignores him and rolls his eyes.
"Yeah, yeah, whatever. It's can’t be that bad. I do have standards you know."
I snort. Ash visibly relaxes a bit and moves his chair back to its original spot around the table.
"So..." he says awkwardly. "What are you guys going to do then?"
Curious to see how far James will go, I watch him out of the corner of my eye to gage his willingness to go along with this.
“Ok,” I say. “I am going to write down a few different dares on pieces of paper, and you will pick out one of them. “ He nods. “But here’s the thing,” I say, with a Machiavellian grin, “whichever dare you pick, you can’t back out of it.”
Now he actually looks slightly worried, but gets his expression under control. “Whatever. Cool.”
Well then, I may as well take advantage of this situation and have some fun.
I get out of my chair and skip happily into the kitchen, the thought of humiliating James making me feel infinitely better. As I write down the dares on separate pieces of paper, I listen in on the conversation taking place within the dining room.
James groans and puts his head in his hands miserably. "Tell me I’m not going to have to do anything stupid," he mutters, and Ash pats him on the back sympathetically.
"Dude, you're pretty much screwed, no one who plays Truth or Dare with London comes out unhurt," he says unhelpfully and James groans even louder.
"Thank you for that charming bit of information, Ash," I say sarcastically as I re-enter the room, and he inclines his head in recognition in my direction.
"There's no need to scare James," I reprimand Ash, and James relaxes visibly and even begins to lift his head from the table. "That's what I'm here for," I say cheerfully and smile at James's obvious display of despair.
“I thought you were my friend, Pumpkin! I’m hurt that you would betray my trust like this!”
"Just put us all out of our misery, London," Liam scolds absently as he reads the newspaper and eats his melon.
"Fine. Here you are, James,” I say cheerfully and lay out the three dares on the table for him to choose from. After much consideration, he points at the one on the right.
I pick it up and read the words I had written only moments before. “Oh my god, this is a good one,” I laugh evilly. “I applaud my diabolical mind.”
"Oh jeez."
"Oh yes. And you have just agreed to swim in the Thames: naked." We stare at each other with blank faces for a moment, ignoring the snorts of laughter coming from everyone else sitting at the table, until I can’t take it anymore and fall back into my seat in a fit of hysterics.
James jumps up out of his seat and points his finger at me, a look of determination set in his features.
"Oh hell no. When pigs fly, and hell freezes over, and Ash is normal," he ignores Ash's sound of protest, "then, and only then, will I ever consider swimming naked in the Thames."
"But, James," I whine. "Remember? We talked about this. You can't back out now! You can't break the sacred rules of Truth or Dare! If you don't do it then you are just a huge chicken!" And with a glance to Ash, we both jump out of our seats and run around the dining room making chicken noises and flapping our arms like 2 oversized birds with epilepsy, while James looks on in bemusement.
"Sit down!" He snaps impatiently, and both Ash and I rush back to our seats to sit with our hands clasped tightly in our laps and our backs straight, like two little school children faced with the cane.
"Let's get this straight right now. I don't give a shit right now about the 'sacred rules' of Truth or Dare! I flat-out refuse to swim naked in the filthiest river in London!"
Damn.
"But think how entertaining for sight-seers," I argue cheekily, and I see Liam and Laura duck their heads quickly to hide the smile that flashes across their faces fleetingly.
James's face assumes its usual cocky smirk as he no doubt thinks of some dirty remark.
"That's true," he says. "I wouldn't want to disappoint them after they came all this way, and just to see the magnificence that is me." He mockingly stares dreamily up at the ceiling, as if envisioning himself as the main tourist attraction of London.
What a jackapple. He really doesn't know the meaning of modesty.
I snort. "Yep. They'd all come flocking, all so they can gape at your oversized ego."
"Sure. More like my oversized d-"
"Okay!" Liam interrupts, his hands raised up in the air in surrender. "None of us really want to hear the ending of that sentence, and we especially don't want to corrupt London's youthful innocence."
Now it's James's turn to snort in disbelief. "London? Innocent? Those two words put together in one sentence create an oxymoron."
"Your d!ck belongs in your pants, not your personality," I snap.
"Oooh, burn!" Ash says and reaches over the table to give me a high five. The sound of our skin slapping together and the sound of James scowling resounds around the room.
"We'll isn't your personality just blinding in the morning," he says scathingly.
"And yours is just bright like the sun... In a rain storm," I retort.
"Tsk tsk," he scolds. "I understand the theory that in order to respect others, you have to respect yourself first, and frankly, I sympathize with your most unfortunate plight."
"What the fudge are you talking about, you crazy fudgeball?!"
"Now, now, Pumpkin. Watch your language,” he says with a smirk.
“As I was saying, I understand how hard it must be to follow that rule. I mean, if I were you, I'd find it nigh on impossible to respect myself too. Myself on the other hand, have no problem whatsoever finding value in myself, all I have to do is look at you, and then look at me. I mean, really, I'm perfect."
"Jeez, James... How do you get anything done?! How do you fit through doors?!"
He looks at me quizzically and I stare at him knowledgeably.
"Come on, James. Get over yourself. Your ego is the size of a small country!"
His face lights up. "Is it named after me?!"
I shake my head in disappointment. "Scratch that," I mutter. "Better make it the size of a continent."
Everyone else at the table laughs quietly, and James stares into space, probably thinking about his nonexistent continent all about him.
"Call TLC, because these two are a new TV show in the making!" Ash says enthusiastically.
James and I share a glance, and then turn our withering gaze on Ash, causing him to get up quickly and excuse himself to go to the bathroom. He doesn't return.
Uncle Liam and Laura chuckle for a moment, and then he puts his fork down and faces us seriously.
"James and London, as funny as this may be, it's time to be serious for a minute. Laura and I are going out for the day, we need to pick up a few things or the house, and in the meantime, you two need to find something to do. I was originally going to have James start with the training for the mission today, but I have a feeling that wouldn't go down too well today. So, you two need to figure something out. Get out if the house and do something," he says, and after studying us curiously for a moment, leaves the table and disappears up the stairs.
"So..." I say awkwardly, tapping my fingers on the table and avoiding James's eyes. "What are we going to do? We could always take a trip to the Thames…” I say cheekily.
James rolls his eyes with a smirk. “I’m starting to think you have an obsession with seeing me naked,” he says.
I flip him the middle finger and he chuckles.
"Well, since our last attempt at going somewhere was a complete and epic fail, I was thinking maybe we could try again," he says.
"Where are we going to go?"
"Well," he says, twiddling his thumbs nervously, "this is probably going to sound really lame, but I was thinking maybe we could go sightseeing. You know, show you London." He smirks. "And it wouldn't hurt that you would have the most amazing guide in England."
"You are so conceited!"
"You know it. Now go get ready."
I get up from the table and make my way back to my room. Maybe this outing won't be such a bad thing. This will give us time to get to know each other better, and maybe, just maybe, I'll find that James isn't as much of an egotistical moron that he seems to be.
"AND DON'T FORGET TO CLEAN YOURSELF UP! YOU WANT TO LOOK AT LEAST DECENT NEXT TO ME!" He shouts from down the hall.
On the other hand... It's not likely.
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A/N
PLEASE COMMENT AND VOTE!!!
Vomment?
What?! Is this a chapter?! Can it be?! IT IS!!! Oh my god it's a miracle!!!
I am SO sorry for the long wait!!! It's been nearly 2 months since the last update!!! (Sorry 'bout that Muffin) I've been really busy with school lately, but the chapters should be coming a bit faster now :)
Anyways... I was bored... So here's a random conversation between the characters.
Ash: I love unicorns and rainbows and the colour purple and sparkles and cupcakes and-
James: SHUT UP!!!
London: James!!! Don't be mean to Ash!!! Get rid of him nicely. Hey Ash!!! Look at that rainbow!!! *points at rainbow in the distance*
There's a unicorn skiing down it!!!
Ash: OMG there is!!! I'm coming unicorn!!! *runs off*
London: What?! No there's not I was just kid- Wait... OMG there is!!! *also runs off*
James: What the hell?! I can't see anything!!! Whatever. *shrugs and runs after them* WAIT FOR ME!!!
Please excuse my randomness... I get like this when I only get 2 hours of sleep. Just ignore it and back away slowly... I'll shut up now :D
Toodles!!!
xoxoxoxoxo,
LovableNightmare
SONG OF THE DAY: I'm Too Tired to Pick One by Me.