~*~
Numbness. The only thing I could feel in this dark void. A world without an end to the shadows covering my whole existence.
Without a doubt, I am dead. There's no question to that fact.
I am weak. I guess, everyone was right, I am never going to surpass my twin.
Being born as the first son of a duke, I always felt like I have and can have everything in my hands. For I am a Razon, I thought nothing could go through me. Yet I was wrong, someone is better than me.
Josh. My twin brother. Only a minute younger than me. We are not that different, in the means of our faces at least.
He was always the best, when I am only second. He was always the first priority, while I have to be independent. Even my first love, he took everything.
Eversince we were born, everyone have always compared me with my brother. Josh the perfect and Rosh the average.
Not once have I ever stopped doubting and questioning myself.
If I was Josh, would they praise me too? If I'm like Josh, will they notice me? If I am Josh, would they appreciate my best?
No.
Because the only one they could and will see is Josh.
The gentle, kind and smart Josh.
Yeah. I guess I'm now the loser.
Are my parents crying now that I'm dead?
Nah, it's more believable that they're celebrating my death by now. They won't waste their tears for something like me.
How ironic.
Is this how dying feels? Somehow, it seemed rather relaxing.
Maybe dying really is better than living in that cruel world.
Never have I ever thought that once in my life, I could ever get a peaceful feeling like this.
It's like nothing else matters in this place.
There are no eyes to stare for me to put on my masked persona. There are no insults for me to cover my ears. And there are no Josh for me to hate.
It was like a paradise.
...
Some time has passed without me having the strength to count, I could only considered it as timeless.
How long has it been? Hours? Days? Weeks? I don't have a clue. All I'm certain in is that I never saw a single sign of an entrance or exit.
Then at one restless day, not far from the dark, I saw a light flicker. My eyes widened in bewilderness. What's that?!
''A light..? Is that the the way out?'' Again, the flicker remained and slowly getting brighter and brighter.
My eyes didn't fail me. The light was starting to get even more bigger causing the abyss to create cracks and slowly peeled off the darkness.
Am I..finally getting out of here?
I am happy, but I somehow felt a bit disappointed. I enjoyed my time living in that numb yet peaceful world of nothingness.
The cracks travelled through every corner as fast as mach 5. The mirroring void of darkness shattered by each gust of breaking.
Not for long, the endless abyss was replaced by a bright light that also slowly enveloped my body at the same time.
The light continued to devour my whole body.
''W-what the——!?'' It's the only thing I could utter before the light fully covered me.
-
*birds chirping*
Feeling my consciousness coming back to me, I slowly opened my eyes and saw a clear blue sky.
Where am I?
I sat up and saw myself in a field near a forest. Then, I felt a bit strange about myself. Why do I feel like I became smaller?
Odd.
Looking down on myself, my eyes went bawled and filled confusion. I stood up and panicked. My body shrunked!
''What in the world..?''
***