If You Think it's Hard to:
Carry forty-five pounds of dead weight on one shoulder and stand up straight
Practice in the heat and perform in the snow
Get along with 200 people you really love (not really)
Stand in close proximity to 20 guys hitting drums with everything they've got while bopping your head like you're into it
Blow until your lungs explode
Wear an eighty pound wool uniform in the 110 degree heat
Watch your music and the director while exhaling , moving your fingers, coordinating that with your tongue, tapping your foot, while continuously listening to the other players around you so that you can make one of a thousand adjustments
Learn several foreign languages (some of which are completely made up)
Maintain good posture while holding a horn and running the 100 yard dash (some players occasionally faltering, thus making it the 100 yard hurdles)
Understanding the subtle differences between "as loud as possible" and "just a little bit louder than that"
Ride the yellow dogs while the football team rides the greyhound
And your parents for the money to buy a new horn when they really want to buy you a pig and sign you up for the local chapter of the Future Farmers of America
Sell band candy in order to fund your trip to some strange and exotic city (often not so strange and exotic and perhaps not so far away, in fact, it may be better to eat the candy and stay at home)
Wear those 1930's q-tips we call shakos and chill in public
March for ten miles in a local parade directly behind "The Mighty One-Hundred" equestrian team
Play Michael Jackson's Greatest Hits on oboe
Listen to a bad tuba section - Listen to a good tuba section
Pay more for your instrument than you did for your car
Wear those monkey suits while your parents make it a Kodak moment
Remembers to show up to a performance with all the little things that you might need like white gloves, valve oil, YOUR HORN, you know, the little things.....
Then MAYBE you're not tough enough to be IN THE BAND!!!