Theo was rather grateful that one of their surnames began with an 'M' because Miss Harper always went in alphabetical order, M was slap bang in the middle of the alphabet meaning that they wouldn't go first, nor would they be last. The middle presentations were normally the ones forgotten the most- unlike the last few which are fresh in people's memories after the class. Theo told Kit this, and Kit thought he was overthinking it all and that nobody would remember any of the presentations in 1 hour.
Mentioning that someone is overthinking, shockingly does not result in them stopping thinking.
Grace and Violet were up before Theo and Kit. Theo still held some grievances against Violet, but admittedly it was looking like a well-thought-out, perfect presentation that would most likely receive an A.
"Shit," Theo whispered as he went back and forth from watching them talk about abortions to his script, his leg beginning to bounce under the table and brain churning relentlessly.
If Kit was anxious, he wasn't showing it. He was doing the exact opposite; folding his script up into a paper airplane and swinging back on his chair.
Next thing Theo knew his hand was being snatched and shoved onto the table harshly.
"What-"
"This helps my brother calm down." Kit shrugged and then grabbed a felt tip pen from Theo's pencil case- since Kit didn't have one. He only carried around one black ballpoint pen in his jacket.
Before Theo could even ask what this was, Kit was drawing smiley faces that liquefied into drips onto Theo's hand, along with spirals and blocky letters. Truthfully, the soothing tip of the pen sliding across his skin softly did actually help somewhat.
"And that is why women get abortions!" Grace took a dramatic bow and then smiled. She'd done most of the talking, but Violet had probably prepared the whole thing.
The class broke out into a chorus of claps, minus the few kids who found abortions 'murder' who tapped the tips of their fingers together gently, to be polite but also show that they disagreed with the pro-choice stance that Violet and Grace had taken.
"Wonderful girls! Great use of knowledge from you both." Miss Harper smiled, as she transited over to the next PowerPoint. Kit had already jumped up out of his seat and was striding to the front, a large grin plastered across his face.
"Hello everyone!!" He saluted to the class and then leaned back against the wall, as he waited for Miss Harper to load up their PowerPoint. Theo did not decide to stride up to the front, rather bow his head down and walk-up.
"Hi." He mumbled.
"I can't hear you." One of the classmates innocently said.
A blush painted his cheeks, and he cleared his throat readying himself to speak louder.
"Get hearing aids then." Kit said back, rolling his eyes.
"That's enough, don't be rude to the audience McCain." Miss Harper sighed, "Off you go." She pointed to the now loaded-up powerpoint.
"Aids! A fabulous thing, huh?" Kit sarcastically announced, pointing towards the front.
Theo just rolled his eyes at the unscripted comment and went through the first slide which was about the symptoms of it and how they changed over time from the 1980s to now. He tried to make it sound as confident as possible but he knew his voice still wavered at some parts.
"Righty, misconceptions since some of you are stupid." Kit started for the next slide, that comment earned him a glare from Miss Harper.
"Firstly, if you have AIDs and have a kid that doesn't mean they will automatically get it. With treatment, it's a 2% chance, and even without it is 25%. Next, even if both of you have AIDs you should still use a condom as there are different strains. AIDs cannot be spread through saliva, sweat, tears, or toilet seats. It only spreads through..." Kit chuckled a little, boyishly before continuing on, "Semen," the rest of the class also laughed, as if the whole topic wasn't about safe sex.
Kit waited for the laughter to subside before continuing, Theo was shuffling nervously waiting for his go, but his throat hadn't closed up yet nor did he feel the need to projectile vomit everywhere so it was going much better than he intended.
"Vaginal fluid, blood or breast milk. So no, AIDs cannot be spread through the air, eating the same food as an infected person, sharing belongings, touch, kissing or hugging." There was the infamous photo of Princess Diana holding the hand of an infected person on the screen, "As Theo previously stated, AIDs-related death has decreased by 42% since 2002, so no AIDs isn't a death sentence."
Kit let out a pointed look at Kade for his last point, glaring at him, blank face set on his face, "Lastly, straight people can get AIDs. Genuinely thought that we left the belief it was a 'gay' disease back in the 80s but apparently not! So, everyone listen to the next slide!"
Then Theo needed to discuss the ways of staying safe and how to get tested, halfway through he stuttered slightly and paused, preparing to nudge Kit in the foot to take over. Kit noticed him pause and nodded at him gently, somehow the small gesture managed to reassure Theo that he'd be able to continue and he got through it without stumbling over any words again. It was as if Kit was able to steady him simply by looking at him in a specific way, that look was enough to not see the classmates, or worry about what they thought- even if it was temporary.
"Yeah, that's the end," Theo said blankly, folding over his piece of paper, and looking over to Miss Harper.
The class repeated the same round of applause, when they did Kit let out a heel click which resulted in an even louder clamor of claps, someone even decided to let out a wolf whistle. Theo knew if he pulled some shit like that the class would break out into radio silence, but hierarchy was a thing, what could he do about it.
"Excellent boys! Thank you so much, go take your seats. Next up is Noah and Kai. No idea how you two ended up together." She tutted and then clicked off to the network of powerpoints.
As they both took their seats, Theo began thanking every God in the book from Allah to Yahweh that he actually presented something for once.
A balled up piece of paper landed right against Kit's temple, he looked over to see who'd thrown it and unsurprisingly the perpetrator was Kade. He rolled his eyes before opening it and noticed Theo trying to peek over his shoulder, so he placed the piece in the middle of the table so he could see too.
"What the fuck was that?"
Kit turned to Kade and shrugged, Kade started scribbling something down on another piece of scrap paper.
"I'm not reading that," Kit mouthed to him from across the class room.
"Kit don't be an asshole," Kade shouted back, chucking it again.
"Kade, enough of the language or you can get out," Miss Harper announced, which now drew the attention onto the two boys exchange.
Theo shuffled in his seat and grabbed the note which landed by his feet, and handed it to Kit.
"Fuck off, no he didn't," Kit scoffed, once he'd read it and scrunched it back up again.
"Yeah whatever," Kade scowled.
There was a long silence as the class kept their eyes pierced onto the two of them, waiting for any indication of what the mystery note had said.
"Right. Kai and Noah would you like to come up and start your essay on..." She scanned over the title of the presentation, "Can we use proper terminology? It's Clhamydia not 'the clap'..."
The boys got themselves prepared and everyone had given up trying to get what the note said out of Kit.
"How'd you do that?" Theo mumbled to Kit afterward trying to change his filled mind.
"Do what?"
"You went off script like you just spoke like a conversation. It was great."
"You did great too. What did I tell you, eh?"
"Shut up." Theo smiled, knocking his shoulder into Kit's.
That smile made Kit pause. He always used to wonder what Dorothy felt when her life went from dull to full colors and dream so quickly. But he thinks he now knows. And he isn't quite sure if that is amazing or petrifying.
"What's got you so grim?" Theo whispered, watching the sudden muscle twitch in Kit's jaw.
Kit sighed plaintively, "Nothing, pay attention." He tried to give an imitation of some sort of reassurance, but judging by the fact Theo made no effort to draw his eyes to the front of the classroom and instead keep an unflinching gaze on Kit, he hadn't succeeded.
"I'm all good." He nodded, and brushed a finger over Theo's hand under the table, letting himself look to the front instead.
"Alright, if you say so." Theo looked at him sympathetically, forcing himself to do the same.
After the class had wrapped up, Theo felt his inner chastisement melting away like a candle and picked the piece of paper up from the desk, after everybody had already left.
'He probs forced you to do it on that lol i'm not mad but whyd u look at me the whole time. you and theo are getting kinda weird, man. you better not be a fag LMAO.'
He ripped it up and threw it in the bin, feeling his breath catch in his throat. It didn't help he had no clue what he'd done wrong for Kit to so suddenly shut down.
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"Welcome back to English everyone!" The teacher ushered everyone in. She was wearing another one of her floral dresses, this time with her hair braided down the side with a bow tying it together, "I have received the assigned books for our reading and we will be reading Perks of being a wallflower! I shall hand out the copies towards the end of the lesson."
"I watched that movie, Miss!" One of the girls called out.
"Did you enjoy it?"
"I did! It was really nice."
"Has anybody read the book?" Miss Miller asked, eyes scanning the room. Theo rose his hand a tiny amount.
"Of course." Kit chuckled with a grin and Theo kicked his shin under the table.
"Oh great! You'll be an expert on it then. Who is your favourite character?"
"Charlie and Patrick." Theo mumbled, feeling singled out by the linger stares of the other students.
"Patrick is my favorite too. I always found his story rather sad." She fixed the position of the bow in her hair.
"Yeah."
"Do we have to read it, Miss?" Noah called out, fiddling with his gum.
"Unfortunately! It's a fun book, I think most of you... will enjoy it. There's a character in it for everyone."
She flattened out her dress and then continued on.
"Our next topic for the poetry is emotions. So, I wanted everyone to write things that they fear on a slip of paper and fold it up and put it into this box." She held up a mustard yellow box she'd hand-decorated with butterfly stickers, Theo felt a pang of guilt over the fact she'd been trying so hard, even though it was her job.
"That box is so pretty Miss, did you make it yourself?" Grace shouted out, cheerfully.
"Yes, I did Grace! Thank you so much. I'm not much of an artist but I love crafts." She placed the box down at the table in the front of the room, "It's anonymous, everyone, but I will probably read a few out for inspiration on your poems, however, don't worry I haven't gotten to know your handwriting yet!"
Kit intentionally let out a massive, exasperated huff, if it was any louder he'd probably pass out from the strain.
"It seems that it might be an issue for some of you... so maybe generic fears like spiders would be sufficient." Her voice was less cheerful and she was beginning to fiddle around with the golden ring that laid on her finger.
"I'm scared of Kai's face, Miss Miller, can I put that in the box?" Noah chuckled. Kai then scrunched up a ball of paper and chucked it at him, whacking him directly in the nose.
"Very funny, refrain from throwing things around the classroom though." She'd chirped up now and had started handing out slips of paper, she got to Kit and patted it down on the desk, "You can lie if you'd prefer." She then continued walking.
The slips of paper were also decorated, obviously not hand-made this time, but they were post-its with borders of hearts around it with vines flowing through them.
"Miss, can I borrow some of these post-its they're so pretty?" One of the girls asked, cheerily.
"Of course Lila! If anybody else would like any let me know. I got them from target if you are curious." She took off a few and placed them on the girl's desk, before hurrying back to the front of the classroom, the click of her woven sandals echoing across the now silent classroom.
Kit tried to look over to what Theo was writing down but he moved his paper away and covered it with a smirk, "Nuh-uh, come up with it yourself. You wouldn't tell me your biggest fear. I'll say when you finally tell me." He then folded it once and scurried off the line of people waiting to put theirs in the box.
"You're my favorite teacher, Miss!" A girl smiled from the back of the classroom.
"Really? That's very sweet! Don't tell the others though, I'm not sure that would be well received."
Kit stiffened his shoulders like he was in some wartime propaganda and stared intently at the paper wondering whether he was going to try and be serious for once or make a laugh out of it again.
He thought about fears he could write that wouldn't end up going to child protective services or placing him in a psych ward so he scribbled down 'falling in love.' and then folding it over itself infinite times until it would no longer fold just in case he went back on his choices and wanted to scribble it out. He then realized that if he folded it so much, and someone else saw it, when Miss. Miller pulled it out to open it up someone would easily be able to link it back to him. So he unfolded it again and folded it back into a half.
He didn't know how to define love but he knew that once it happened it would be dangerous for him, and he wouldn't be able to let go. He'd told Grace he'd loved her, since she said it first and he'd feel too much guilt to leave it like that, but he knew it was a lie. He couldn't love her. How was he supposed to know what love was?
There was want, and lust, which was different to love. He knows he wants Theo.
He thought about him today, and yesterday, and before that. He knows he will be thinking about him tomorrow, and the day after that. Continually for days. Kissing him slowly, tracing his fingers along his jaw, and his hands. Kissing him in the car, in the rain, on the couch. His forehead, his cheek, his nose.
But what is love?