I feel like I'm falling.
It's a strange feeling.
It's not quite as free as flying.
But also I'm not as panicked as I thought I expected.
My head feels supported.
I think I've already hit the ground as I feel something soft beneath me.
It can't be concrete.
It's too comfortable.
I try to swallow but feel something in the way.
I move my tongue slightly but feel something hard push against it.
I try to move my jaw, but whatever is in my mouth is restricting my movements.
I try to open my eyes.
But they feel like they have lead weights on them.
I push to open my eyelids harder.
I feel them flutter.
The heaviness is present.
But I start to see some light peek through my lashes.
I hear a mumbling of a voice.
It's sounds female.
The muffled noise starts to clear and I can kind of make out what she is saying.
"Shes waking... I see her eyes moving..'
It all then sounds mumbled.
But she sounds panicked.
But she also sounds familiar.
Like the tones of her voice strike a familiar chord with my memory.
"Nurse!!!!" I hear the voice louder and clearer this time.
I try to move any part of my body that will let me. But it feels like I'm being held down.
The weight is undeniable.
I find myself being able to wiggle my thumb.
But it's not an easy task.
So this is how Uma Thurman felt in kill bill.
I stop myself from repeating "wiggle your big toe".
In my head of course.
I try to swallow again.
It's my body's natural reaction but again, I'm prohibited by this thing in my mouth.
I get a dirty thought.
I will never take Camila deep throating me for granted again.
I try to snigger.
But I can just about move my lips around this damn thing.
"Nurse!! I think she's.. smirking? Or in pain in don't know!" I hear the voice again. This time it's higher pitched.
I feel my eyeballs rolling around in my head trying to gain focus as I will my eyelids to open.
"Geew.. da.. tig... awa" I try to speak but my throat feels dry and this Damn plastic thing is again in the way.
Another dirty thought pops into my head.
I will never take Camila deep throating me AND talking dirty at the same time for granted ever ever again.
"ooouu..tt" I try to verbalise, to get this thing out of my mouth.
My eyelids start to open more, but not fully.
My body is starting to wake up, I feel pain all the way through my body but more specifically in my leg and my hip.
What the fuck happened.
I feel a tug in my mouth and feel as though my lungs are being ripped out.
I take a sharp intake of breath and feel every inch of whatever is in my mouth and throat being removed.
Suddenly I am given a reprieve and take a big gasp of air.
That fucking hurt.
"Waa tha...hee... lll" I try to verbalise my thoughts, still unable to fully open my eyes but light is starting to filter through my eyelashes.
"BABY!" I hear.
I try to hone in on the voice and focus my thoughts.
"Baby, oh my god, you are okay" I hear the voice start to get closer to me and suddenly feel a weight to the right side of my body, I try and angle my eyes down and notice a blob of brown.
I close one eye to focus on the image.
It looks like hair, well hair attached to a head.
I hear a sob.
"oh my god, I can't believe it" I hear mumbled directly into my ear.
I recognise the voice instantly.
"Mi... Mila" I mumble out.
I try to lift my hand to be able to feel something.
I can just about wiggle my fingers, it was an improvement on just my thumb, but as quick as I wiggle them they are gripped into what I can only assume is her hand.
I feel wetness against my hand and my arm being lifted up and the weight that was previously on my right hand side lift.
I see someone to my left but I can't make them out, they are holding something.
"Here, let me give her this, it will counteract the sedative and she will be able to regain movement and sight quicker". The voice states.
It is not one I recognise.
But it sounds male.
I feel a sharp prick in the back of my hand.
Ouch, motherfucker.
Suddenly a coldness is running through my veins.
It is not pleasant.
Is this heroin?
As quick as the coldness spreads I can see the blurriness in my eyes begin to fade.
The room is silent.
I blink, for what seems like hours, but must have been minutes.
The ceiling starts to come into view.
It looks bland.
It looks like a hospital ceiling.
I start taking in my surroundings.
I hear beeping.
It's regular.
I slowly start to move my head from side to side, loosening up my frozen neck, I catch a glimpse of what I assume is the source of the beeping. I notice the squiggle move frequently and the numbers next to it.
A heart beat monitor.
I follow the wire from the machine with my eyes all the way to the little clip on my index finger of my left hand.
Okay.
That beep is my heartbeat.
This can't be good.
"Y/n" I hear my name being said so softly.
I shoot my glance to the right.
Camila.
I take in her appearance.
I love her.
She is my fiancé.
But she looks like shit.
And this is coming from someone who clearly is in a hospital bed hooked up to a heart monitor.
I look down at myself.
Also wearing a nightdress.
I glance back up at Mila.
She looks like she has not slept or showered in days.
My eyebrows furrowed.
How long have I been in this bed.
Dread starts to fill me.
I really hope it's not too long.
If it is longer than a week the hair on my balls is going to need a hedge trimmer.
"Mila" I croak out.
She is staring at me intently.
"Yes baby" she answers eagerly.
"Wa..water" I stutter out.
"Oh shit, yes, you must be thirsty" She jumps up but does not let go of my hand.
I take in her appearance.
She is wearing my hoodie and running shorts.
She has lost weight.
A lot of weight.
What the hell has been going on.
Camila with one hand grabs a cup that is on the side and brings it to my lips.
Slowly she starts to tilt the cup to my lips and the water starts to flow into my mouth.
My God.
It is like liquid heaven.
I feel the coldness grace my lips and my throat.
It feels amazing.
Camila pulls the cup up slightly.
"More?" she questions.
I nod.
Taking in more of the water which must have been blessed by Jesus Christ himself as it feels so good it must be filling me with the Holy Spirit.
I shake my head slightly.
To let Mila know I am done.
For now.
I lick my lips wetting them as they feel as cracked as my grandma's feet.
Mila is leaning over me.
Still staring at me intently.
What the hell is up with her.
Suddenly Camila has leaned down and is kissing me so hard on my lips I am worried they might bruise.
I kiss her back.
I feel wetness touch my cheeks.
I don't think I am crying.
Camila pulls back and both her hands had come to hold my face during the kiss.
I see the tears running down her face.
My eyes search hers.
I see something I can't describe.
Something I have never seen before.
"Camila" I say her name softly, my voice still husky.
She doesn't answer me.
I continue.
"What happened?"
Camila lets out a big breath I didn't know she had been holding.
I watch as Camila bites her lip softly.
"You came back to me" she says so simply.
I look at her.
I don't change my expression but inside I am confused.
Did I leave her?
________________________________________________________________________________
Well I hope the year long wait was worth it so far.
Shit about to heat up!
And Ari... might be coming back