*From here on out, these chapters will be following the original style of writing for this book. These chapters have not been edited, and they have not been rewritten to follow the plot. This entire chapter will not make any sense to you because it will not connect with the previous chapter whatsoever. You can read it if you'd like, but it's...the worse thing you will ever read in your entire life. Literally, no joke. I'll be rewriting this soon, so be prepared for that! All the love. X.*
Tuesday, March 25, 2014.
Harry's POV
I honestly don't know what happened...
I don't understand what I was thinking...Or what I was doing...
"Harry?"
I made the same mistake twice. Twice now.
"Harry, I know you're awake...Your eyes are wide open." Niall giggles at me trying to get me to smile back at him. "Harry, it's time to wake up." He says turning on his side to face me.
I refuse to get up and continue to look at Niall. "N-Niall..." I stutter as I begin to cry.
"H-Harry, what's wrong?" He grabs onto me and holds me.
I refuse to talk and I finally sit up and get out of bed as I cry. Niall gets up and takes his clothes off the ground. I do the same and put my shirt back on myself.
"I love you so much." Niall, who was now behind me, wraps his arms around my waste and leans his head in my shoulder.
"Niall, you make it so hard to be mad at you." I tease and turn around facing him. Niall wipes my tears off my cheeks with his hand as I smile at him.
"Why are you mad at me?" The boy in the nude asks me wrapping his arms around me again.
"I wasn't expecting you to fucking screw me, Niall. It wasn't like I didn't want it, I just wasn't prepared...or in the mood-"
"Says the man who made the first move, wow." Niall teases.
"Fuck you, Niall. I actually wasn't...until I saw you and I might've...accidentally got too happy?" I say trying not to sound inappropriate.
"Okay, so, you admit...Your fault if you get pregnant again?" Niall raises his eyebrows at me.
"Ugh..." I complain breaking out of his arms. "Get dressed, Horan." I say fully dressing myself.
Niall laughs and put underwear on. "Why are you here, not trying to seem like I don't want you to be here or anything, but why are you here?" He asks confused placing his shirt on his bare chest.
I freeze in my spot. "I just...missed you..."
I shouldn't lie to him...But I never told him about Liam anyways. At least, not the whole thing.
"I missed you too." He smiles at me and pecks my cheek. "I just wanted to make sure you were okay, Harold. If anything bad ever does happen to you, just tell me, okay?"
I nod my head pretending to smile at him.
Not bad enough...I guess.
"Why were you crying?" I ask remembering what his mother told me.
"When?" He takes his hand through his hair, fixing what I messed up.
"Your mum said you were crying when you came home."
"Oh, I was crying because I didn't want to say goodbye...But you know, you came back an hour later..."
"Okay, we know what happened then..." I chuckle zoning out.
"I love you, I don't know how, I don't know why, but I do. I-I haven't been able to sleep since the incident."
"I haven't either, Liam, but that was how ever long ago and it's over with-"
"But I keep reliving it and it's killing me everyday. I never meant to hurt you, I know you didn't mean it either but it keeps haunting me. Harry, I-I love you."
"I want to be with you."
No, you don't...You don't want to be with me...Stop lying to yourself.
"I need you, Harry."
No, no, no. You don't need me...
"I'm guessing that is a yes?"
"W-what?" I ask snapping back into reality.
" Are you hungry?"
"Y-yes, very much." I smile at the boy that was now on the other side of the room.
"Does my mum know you are here?" Niall asks wiping his shirt off.
"Yeah, she was the one that let me in."
"Okay, do you want to eat here or-"
"Here's fine." I nod my head walking over to where he was standing.
Niall opens the door pushing the cold air towards us causing me to shiver. He leads us down the stairs, through the living room, and into the kitchen.
"MUMMY, FOOD!" Niall's little brother shouts beside his younger sister.
"Shut up, Buddie! I'm trying to finish my math homework." Perrie shouts back at him.
"But I'm hungwy and I'm telling my mummy to make me food-"
"You don't have to scream in my ear." Perrie rolls her eyes at the little boy who stuck his tongue out at her.
I hope I'm not havng another child.
"Stop fighting you two, we have a guest." Phoebe says as she watches Niall and I sit down.
The two children suddenly shut up when they notice I was there.
"Food is almost ready, Buddie. Be patient." Phoebe reassures the hungry boy.
"Thank the toof fairy..." Buddie mumbles and I chuckle at his comment.
Perrie looks up at me and rolls her eyes.
Someone's on their period.
Niall notices and grabs onto my hand from under the small table just incase I was offended. I look over at him and lean my head on his shoulder.
"Ooh, someone's getting married." Buddie teases and I laugh at the little boy.
"Buddie, you are so cute, has anyone ever told you that?" I ask him as his small cheeks turn a bright pink color.
"Mummy has, Perrie says I'm annoying asshole." Buddie says randomly leaving Niall to burst out laughing and me to sit there with my eyes completely open.
"Perrie, what do you call your brother?" Phoebe asks placing the plates on the table with food on them.
"I call him an angel from heaven." She lies and continues to finish her homework.
"That's what I thought, hurry up and eat your food. You guys don't want to be late for school."
Buddie stuffs as much food as he can in his mouth as soon as he gets his plate and starts coughing.
Phoebe stays standing next to the refrigerator as she eats her breakfast.
"I can move-"
"No, no, I'm fine, Harry. Just enjoy your meal." She smiles at me kindly.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, Harry." She nods her head.
"Thank you, love." I smile and wink at her.
Niall hits my leg as he eats his bacon.
I chuckle and continue to eat my food and look at Niall's beauty.
"I'm not hungry, mum." Perrie says walking out of the room without saying another word.
"I'LL EAT IT!" Buddie shouts as he swallows his first enormous bite.
"Someone's hungry..." Niall mumbles as he sips his orange juice.
I smile at Niall eating as much as I could fit on my fork.
"We have some hungry people among us." Phoebe laughs.
After five minutes Buddie finally gets full, "No more, mummy."
"Okay, Buddie, get ready to take them to school."
Buddie gets up and walks out of the kitchen. Niall and I stand up and place our plates in the sink to help his mother.
"Do you need to get anything before we leave?" Niall asks me as we walk out of the room.
"Yeah, I'll be right back." I say running up the stairs to get my bag. I enter the small room and search the room for my bag and find it on the floor. I go to pick it up but the bag opens and my phone falls to the floor. I sit on the floor and grab my phone seeing if it broke. I try to turn it on when I realize I had a voicemail. I quickly put the phone up to my ear and listen to it.
"Hey...Harry...I just wanted to call you and let you know that...I-I have a pile of your stuff that you left here before you ran off...I also wanted to tell you that. . I'm sorry. I really do mean it... I shouldn't have fell in love with you...I'm sorry. I didn't mean for it to happen...I feel horrible about this, I don't know why I even thought-maybe...You...felt the same way...No, no...I'm sorry I'm annoying you...I just can't let you...Disappear forever...Without ending it on a positive note...I know, you don't want to ever see me again but...I-I'm sorry. And if that's the last thing I ever say to you, then so be it. I'm sorry..Just know, I am...Just remember me, please. And never forget me...This isn't me telling you to come back, I just want to tell you, sorry...I guess. I'm sorry, I just thought-... Yeah...Bye, Harry..."
Why, why would he do this to me? Is he trying to get me to feel bad for him?
"Harry!?" Niall calls out from down the stairs.
I wipe the tears away and throw the phone in my bag and zip it back up. I run down the stairs where all of them were staring at me.
"Let's go!" Perrie shouts irritated.
I quickly put my shoes on my feet as everyone exits the house. I hop out of the house finally putting my shoe on my foot.
"I'm going to be late, let's go!" Perrie shouts at me as I run to the car and sit in the back row next to Niall and Buddie.
"Perrie, you're not going to be late, stop complaining." Phoebe scolds her.
"I'm sorry, I really do mean it, I shouldn't have fell in love with you."
Don't do this to me, Liam. Don't make me feel bad for you. I don't want to forgive you, not now. I don't want to think about you...Not now. Don't do this, Liam. Don't. Not. Now.
"Harry, are you okay?" Niall whispers to me noticing I was crying.
"Y-yes.." I whisper wiping my eyes.
"I need you, Harry."
No, no. Not now, you don't need me.
Leave me alone.
"It's just like we are college roomates or something. I guess...Do you think of me like your child, Liam?"
"I do worry about you a lot like a normal parent should...but I love you more than I should-"
"If you ever...feel like...you want more of me...you need to t-tell me, okay?"
"Okay...I love y-"
"Okay, good."
"I never want you to leave me, ever. I don't know what I would do if you left me again-"
"I love you too much to ever leave you, Liam. I never will leave you again...Ever..."
"I-I love you too, Harry. I wish you would know that-"
"I know you do, I'll always be here."
Always...