The Group Chat (Marauders AU)

By reject_20

594K 16.6K 10.5K

The five Marauders have a group chat. This should be fun, right? More

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14 years later

46

3.3K 96 80
By reject_20

🐍minnie's children🦁

boys 
code moony

wormy🐭✨
i was summoned

lion bitch🦁❤️
here

puppy🐕🖤
'sup

my moony🌙❤️
i hate all of you right now
vixen no

vixen yes
i talked to peeves yesterday
for once i was able to have a normal conversation with him

lion bitch🦁❤️
that sirius huh?

enough with the puns

puppy🐕🖤
the sirius puns shall never die

shut up SOB

wormy🐭✨


of course you did

lion bitch🦁❤️
puns aside
why did you talk to our favorite poltergeist?
or better yet
how did you manage to have a normal conversation with him?

mention the bloody baron and you're good to go

puppy🐕🖤
noted

ANYWAYS
LISTEN TO ME!
give me a sec
don't go anywhere

my moony🌙❤️
as if we have a choice

sent an audio!

wormy🐭✨
vix
that's a podcast
TEN MINUTES!?

puppy🐕🖤
that's nothing
she once sent an audio that was almost an hour long

what can i say?
i had a lot to get out of my chest
JUST LISTEN TO IT

lion bitch🦁❤️
all right
give me a sec
geez

puppy🐕🖤
just finished
honestly remus
why didn't you talk to me or reg about this?🤡
fucking dumbass

my moony🌙❤️
way to make me feel better sirius
five fucking stars

BECAUSE ALL OF YOU BOYS ARE EXTREMELY DIFFICULT TO TALK TO
AND APPARENTLY IM THE ONLY ONE CAPABLE OF REASONING AROUND HERE

lion bitch🦁❤️
there's no need to shout

YES THERE IS
YOU PEOPLE DONT LISTEN TO ME
I KNOW SHIT
AND YET YOU PEOPLE DONT NOTICE THINGS
DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS BEING ME?
KNOWING THE THINGS I KNOW?

wormy🐭✨
why are we difficult to talk to?
vix
we're your best friends 🤡

and yet i tell more stuff to the queens than i do to you boys

my moony🌙❤️
i wonder why🙄

BECAUSE YOU PEOPLE DONT LISTEN
reg was right when he said that we have a toxic relationship

puppy🐕🖤
we don't have a toxic relationship🤡

actually
yes we do
you need to get over your mommy issues
and i need to get rid of all my baggage
so yes
ITS TOXIC

Lion bitch🦁❤️
*britney spears plays quietly in the background*

NOT THE TIME JAMES
what are we going to do about our favorite wolves?
THEYRE GETTING ON MY LAST NERVES
MY HAIR WILL TURN GREY BY THE TIME WE GRADUATE IF WE DONT DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT

my moony🌙❤️
i thought you said that you weren't going to meddle?

i gave you three weeks
it's almost the twins' birthday
AND YOU HAVENT DONE SHIT
so yes
WERE MEDDLING
first
i'm meddling with the two of you
then
i'm meddling with lils and bam bam

wormy🐭✨
frank and alice?

the queens and i will take care of it
AS ALWAYS
WERE ALWAYS CLEANING UP AFTER YOU BOYS

lion bitch🦁❤️
thank you?
what do you want us to do vix?

my moony🌙❤️
ABSOLUTELY NOTHING

puppy🐕🖤
we're talking to the head marauder
stfu remus

for now
nothing
let me plan
i'll come up with a plan soon
let's just focus on the twins birthday for now ig
i have to talk to the queens first

wormy🐭✨
you feeling okay?

yeah
i'm just getting a headache rn
you people give me migraines

lion bitch🦁❤️
vix
we're looking at you from across the hall
you look like your going to pass out
and if it weren't for marlene putting her arm around you
you would've
where are you even going?🤡
COME BACK HERE

IM FINE
just forgot to eat yesterday
and i kinda got my period today
i'm okay guys
really

puppy🐕🖤
bullshit
why didn't you eat?

too busy taking care of all of you
and the queens
and reg
and i had to tutor some of reg's friends last night
so there's that too ig

my moony🌙❤️
vix
you do know that we can take care of ourselves right?

lion bitch🦁❤️
that's bullshit
we can't
but you need a break vix
some of the queens can take care of us
evans or sunny can take over for a day

no way
no one's taking care of my boys except for me
idc if the queens are my best friends or not
you boys are mine
i don't share
i'm jealous like that

puppy🐕🖤
vix
you need a break
we're a lot to handle we know
but you need a break
don't be like hamilton and take a damn break🤡

wormy🐭✨
at least we know that she won't cheat

lion bitch🦁❤️
she has morals, peter
my god-
mum raised her with morals ffs

my moony🌙❤️
can we argue about this later?
where is vix?

puppy🐕🖤
speckles hasn't answered my messages
and sunny won't take my calls
and reg is in class
so idk

umm hi
this is corvus
jade passed out in myrtle's bathroom after puking her guts out
we're taking her to the hospital wing rn
frank is there because he broke his arm last night
he said he'll take care of her until we finish classes

lion bitch🦁❤️
fuck
thanks alice
we're ouw

my moony🌙❤️
we have a potions test in thirty minutes...

wormy🐭✨
okay so after the test we're going up
what are we telling slughorn and minnie?

lion bitch🦁❤️
the truth
vix will receive the scolding of a lifetime from minnie
but idc

puppy🐕🖤
i'll tell minnie
and i'll let sunny tell slughorn

lion bitch🦁❤️
aight

...

🖕🏼the pack🖕🏼

sister❤️
marauders
what the fuck did you do to my sister?

lion bitch🦁❤️
for the first time
absolutely nothing, evans
and she's MY sister

best black👯‍♀️
you sure don't act like it sometimes james
neither of you do
pomfrey told us she had another collapse
all of the stress and her not eating yesterday finally got her

blondie👯‍♀️
and her period

baby black🥺🖤
wait
jade passed out?
WHAT DID YOU FOUR IDIOTS DO TO MY BIG SISTER?
SIRIUS ORION BLACK THE THIRD
ILL KILL YOU

puppy🐕🖤
calm down there baby bro
we didn't do anything to her
but she'll be okay right?

angel🥺❤️
she will be once she wakes up
frank said that she's still passed out
pomfrey wants to talk to the four of you later
same with minnie

puppy🐕🖤
YOU TOLD MINNIE!?
I WAS GONNA TELL HER

best black👯‍♀️
knowing you
you'd probably alter the story
so yes
corvus and i told her
she's pissed at the four of you
she told us to tell you four that after class, you're going straight to her office
you four are in big trouble
with her and us

baby black🥺🖤
and me too
honestly marauders
get your heads out of your damn asses
istg

lion bitch🦁❤️
WE DIDNT DO SHIT

sister❤️
AND THATS THE PROBLEM TOERAG
ARE YOU FAKING IT OR WERE YOU BORN STUPID?

blondie👯‍♀️
how many years has it been since jade started taking care of all of you?
and us?
and baby reggie?

wormy🐭✨
for prongs since she exited the womb
for the rest of us
since she turned eleven

best black👯‍♀️
exactly
that makes sixteen years
and i know that prongs is protective and all that jazz
but have you even stopped to notice that jade hasn't been herself for days?
and every time we ask her she always gives us the same answer
"i'm fine, don't worry about me."
and
"i gotta go make sure the boys are okay. they need me rn."

sister❤️
she moves heaven and hell for four boys who won't move it for her
but she doesn't care
why?
because there's nothing she wouldn't do for her boys
when was the last time you people actually listened to her?

puppy🐕🖤
wdym?
i listen

baby black🥺🖤
you hear, starboy
you don't listen
you haven't noticed the slight changes in her voice lately
she's tired
she doesn't sleep at all guys
because if it's not remus ft her at three am
it's me telling her to walk to the common room because i had a nightmare or need someone to talk to
she's been there for all of us
and yet nobody's there for her

lion bitch🦁❤️
i think you guys are making a big deal out of all this

sister❤️
we're actually not
i read your gc
"you people dont listen"
"you people dont notice shit"
ring any bells?

wormy🐭✨
we were talking about moony

my moony🌙❤️
not in that specific moment...
i think the queens are right guys...
vixen is always there to take care of us but we're never there to take care of her

puppy🐕🖤
idk what you're talking about
i'm the boyfriend
i take care of her

best black👯‍♀️
is that so?
tell me
what's her go-to movie when she's feeling upset?

puppy🐕🖤
aladdin

sister❤️
wrong
it's finding nemo
when was the last time she actually sat down and cried to you?

lion bitch🦁❤️
vixen doesn't cry
she doesn't have a soul

sister❤️
wrong again
she cries
a lot actually
the night before the moon
the morning after
she just never shows it around you boys

my moony🌙❤️
and why's that?

baby black🥺🖤
because you four are too busy worrying about your own problems to notice
james is worried that he'll never date lily
remus is worried about dating my sister (which i approve btw)
sirius is worried about merlin knows what
and peter worries about dinner
the girls and i are the only ones who care for jade here apparently

lion bitch🦁❤️
look
i'm the twin
i think i should be able to notice when my sister isn't feeling well

sister❤️
if you actually acted like a brother instead of a bother
you would've noticed that she wasn't feeling well from the start
look guys
we're not telling you how to live your life
but the signs were there
they always were
you people were just to blind to notice

angel🥺❤️
frank texted me just now
jade woke up
so delete the messages or some shit

no need
i read them all

my moony🌙❤️
how you feeling vix?

i'm okay

lion bitch🦁❤️
see
she's okay
we're ouw up, didi

don't bother tbh
i want to be alone for a while
btw
the queens and reg are right
you boys don't notice things until they're directly right in front of you
pomfrey wants to talk to you boys
she's in her office
and minnie's here checking up on me
after you talk to pomfrey you're going to her office to speak with her

jade left the group chat. 

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