iii. black lake
- silks of heaven, chapter three -
THEY WERE LAUGHING TO the point where their stomachs ached.
"You asshole!"
Jasmine and Regulus were sitting by the Black Lake, watching as the water peacefully swirled and swished. He had gotten frustrated of her reading, so he chucked her book into the water.
"You're a fucking ass, Reg," she laughed.
"Sorry!" He put his arm around her and let her rest her head on his chest. "I want you to pay attention to me. Properly," he added when she opened her mouth to speak.
"Fine. So ... why do you want me to pay attention to you?"
"I want to confess my undying love for you!" he said sarcastically, but those words pulled on her heartstrings. "I just want to catch up, of course. We're barely together, seeing as most of our classes are different and we're in different houses."
She nodded in agreement.
"Remus kissed Sirius. I mean, is that what you meant or do you need a bit less drama?"
"What? Hold on, my brother, Sirius? Remus kissed my brother?" Reg moved his arm off my shoulder and ran his hands through his hair. "Shit, then."
"I think they're cute," she shrugged.
"No, me too. And surprisingly, I'm happy for that wanker that calls himself my brother. But, just think for a second, Jas, what if my parents find out? Remus is a half-blood Gryffindor."
She didn't think about that. At all. Remus is not the guy that Walburga and Orion Black would like to see paired with Sirius.
"How would they know?" she mumbled.
"If it were a normal son, they wouldn't. But Sirius would brag about it. And I can't stand to see him the way he is when he argues with my parents," he continued. "Dumbass. Fucking — dumbass! What's going through his brain —"
"Reggie! Calm down, please." — her voice fell to a whisper — "I hate seeing you like this. All worried and shit. I'm sure they won't find out."
His eyes lay on her again. There was gentleness in the way he stared at her. It was silent. They made no eye contact, but they didn't take our eyes off each other. There was also hunger in the way he stared at her. Aggressiveness, in a way.
"You're right," Regulus suddenly said. "I'm overreacting. I don't even care what happens to him. He's asking for it at this point."
"I just hope he'll be okay. I know you don't care about him, but I do," Jasmine said, "now it's your turn. How is school going for you?"
"I'm dreading Christmas because my parents want me back at home," he said.
"You can tell them you're going to a friend's," she suggested, "I know that my parents wouldn't mind having you round for Christmas. I mean if they've had someone like Sirius, you'll be no problem, right?"
A smile was planted onto his face. "Really?"
"Yeah, for sure!" she smiled back. "Only if you want to. It's boring at mine round Christmas, what with James always out."
"Wow, thank you, Jasmine," he said, "you're amazing. My parents wouldn't care, as long as they're told you're pureblood."
She nodded. "Anytime, Reg."
***
It was any other day in November when the snow started falling out of nowhere.
Remus offered to take Jasmine up to the library to help study for a Dark Arts test they were doing and so she was sitting on the ledge of the window, watching the snow hall as Remus roamed through the book stacks to find books on their subject.
"Jas, come on, I think we're ready to start," he called.
She jumped off the ledge and walked over to him. She rested her head on his shoulder as he showed her the books he chose.
They heard a crash from the other side of the library and looked through the shelf to see what had happened, then a feminine, high voice spoke.
"Reg, shush!"
Jasmine was shocked. No one else ever called Regulus by his nickname. Simply, because no one else was friends with him like that.
She got a closer look through the gap between two books. Regulus had his arms around a girl, laughing as she put her fingers through his hair. Remus covered his mouth and moved back, but she kept peeking.
The girl pulled his head down to her height and pulled him into a kiss. A horribly long one. It hurt her, watching him happy with someone else, doing what she longed to do with him. But, she couldn't. Because he was her best friend and she promised she wouldn't catch feelings.
The girl laughed again after kissing him.
"C'mon, your dorm?" Regulus asked, taking her hand and running out of sight. Jasmine sighed and turned back to Remus.
"Remus," she mumbled and he nodded, "how did it feel seeing Sirius with other boys?"
He caught on quickly.
"It felt ..." he was thinking of the right words. "It felt like this."
She wanted to cry so badly. She wanted to hate Regulus, but she couldn't. This wasn't his fault. He didn't know she was watching, he didn't know she liked him. But, one of their rules was no keeping secrets. And this is a pretty big secret.
Her vision was fogging with tears. Remus noticed and he hugged her.
"Jas, look at me and Sirius now," he said, "it'll get better, I promise. It hurts now, doesn't it? But me and you both know it'll get better."
"No it won't."
Her voice was muffled, she dug her face into his shoulder. He hugged her tighter.
"C'mon, I'll tell you what. How about we go back to the common rooms, trade books and get James to get us hot chocolate from the Kitchens?"
She pulled off him and smiled. He took out his hand and she slipped hers into it.
"I'd like that, Moony."
He let out a soft laugh.
They walked out of the library silently, leaving the Dark Arts books behind. It was quite obvious that neither of them knew what to say.
The walk back to their common rooms were awkward and silent. When they entered the common rooms, Sirius saw them and immediately ran up to Remus, swinging his arm around him.
"Where've you been?" Sirius asked.
"Library," Remus responded, "could you ask James to get me and Jas hot chocolate from the Kitchens? She's a bit" — he looked at her weirdly and she nodded — "upset."
"Oh, alright," Sirius nodded. "I'll go with James so you can have the commons all to yourselves."
"Why, where's Pete?" Jasmine asked.
"Getting us some music vinyls from the Hufflepuffs," Sirius shrugged, "Remus told him about some good Muggle music."
She laughed and nodded. Sirius went back to James, dragging him to the Kitchens.
For the rest of the night, Remus managed to keep her mind off the earlier incident with Regulus.
The way that her brother's friends treated her as if she was one of them always made her feel special. Even if she does act like James annoys her a lot, he is everything you'd want in a brother. And more.
"Jas!"
James was calling for her by the portrait of the common rooms.
"Jasmine, your mate's out here, waiting for you," he said.
"Tell him to fuck off, I'm not in the mood," she groaned, digging her face into her hands.
She heard James say, "Fuck off, she's not in the mood."
But he didn't go.
"She'll come 'round eventually. Now, leave. She's tired," James said.
"Just let me in?" Regulus' voice sounded hurt.
"Go away, mate. Or I'll hit you. I don't care if you're Sirius' brother or Jasmine's best mate."
She sighed and stood up, walking over to James.
"Thanks," she muttered to James, "you can go, I'll talk to him."
James kissed her head and walked over to replace her on the seat by the fireplace. She turned to Regulus.
"I don't know if you got the message from James, but I need you to leave," she said, and before he could say anything she added, "I just don't want to talk, okay?"
His face fell, eyes softened and mouth slightly open.
"Jas —"
"Not now, please, I don't want to fight."
"You're right ..."
And without a second thought, he turned away and walked off.