Warning: lots of commentary lol, oof I accidently put some swears but too lazy to change it xD
some references to the comics
A/N: Honestly no idea where this was going but ye just maybe don't do read this xD
Batman POV~ (Flashback)
I arrive at the rooftop where the bat signal is located and Jim Gordan was awaiting my arrival. "Harley Quinn has been spotted at an abandoned warehouse on Crime Blvd (A/N: Cause I couldn't think of anything plus I'm very not creative lol) appeared to have some dangerous weapons but not quite confirmed", Jim told me while flipping pages on a clipboard "Plus she was also seen with a man wearing what seemed like clown makeup, slicked back dark green hair and a purple suit", he adds. "I'll go see what she's planning, in the meantime get your team ready for arresting Harley and her new accomplice", I told him and disappeared into the dark of night soaring above the buildings.
At the Warehouse~
"Well, well, well. If it ain't the lil' bat", I heard Harley say from behind me. I turned around but it was to late, I fell to the ground, having been hit in the head then I heard someone else speak. "Hey Harlz! Why did you want this stuff?", I could just barely see a man in makeup hold items in his arms. I heard him ask about why I was here just before I got more blows to the head then passed out.
Time Skip(still in Warehouse)~
I woke up and the first thing I saw was someone being electrocuted because they were trying to take my mask off and for some reason they were laughing at being electrocuted. I blink a few times and after a while my vision focuses on a man with make up on, slicked back dark green hair and a purple suit. He tries taking of my mask and got electrocuted again "Ow why is your mask electrocuted?! Doesn't it hurt to touch when you go to put it on??", he says as he reaches to try taking my mask off again. I pull away from his hand as much as I could since my actions are limited due to being tied to a chair with rope, which honestly, will be easy to break out of when no one is looking.
He tried pulling off my mask again "Could you stop trying to take of my mask. All it will earn you is being electrocuted more and n-" I was cut off when the man got electrocuted again. "Puddin' just stop, it ain't comin' off", Harley said as she walked into the room chewing on what looked like a carrot stick for some reason. "Listen to your girlfriend, she's right", I said nonchalantly. They just exchanged looks at each other then they bursts out in laughter. "y- ha! y- you think I would date this loos'a?!? Wow bats and I thought ya were the smart one.", she said laughing. "Words hurt y'know Harley..", the man said with obvious pain in his eyes. "Oh toughen up Mistah J, what, Ya think I'd actually like an ugly muck such as ya self?? plus you're pathetic! Ha! you must be more delusional then you lead on ta be!", she said this and he looked at his feet, I could tell he was on the brink of tears from her rude comments about him.
Randomly he just smiled wide as if none of that had just happened which caught me and surprisingly Harley off guard as well. "Well! mouth pop who wants Chinese?", he asks which caught me off guard, so bad! That I accidently let a short laugh slip out. Harley laughed "well would ya look at that. Mistah J managed to get the bat ta laugh on their first meetin' how cute" she said with a slightly agitated tone in her voice. I saw him walk away on the phone and I heard he was actually ordering Chinese food.
"Hey! Could you get me some 'Cream Cheese Rangoon' and 'The Original Orange Chicken' please?", I asked him and he laughed at this. "Yeah sure! Want anything to drink with that?", I thought for a moment. "What place are you ordering from?", I asked to which he replied "Panda Express"
"Hmmm ok then maybe a cold milk tea with tapioca pearls", I say (A/N: Dude all this sounds so dang delicious especially the orange chicken but I can't have any of it cause apparently it's all containing gluten and I can't eat my delicious gluten anymore TmT being teenager sucks with high elevated tryglyserides #CompletelyButcheredDatSpellingProbablysLolz)
"Ew tapioca pearls... but at least it's not tapioca pudding I guess blegh", he said shivering slightly then went to order the stuff. Which left only me and Harley in the room at this point. She looked over at me scowling angrily, seemingly smoke came out her nostrils like an angry fire breathing dragon about ready to burst and engulf a whole village with it's fiery breath. (A/N: obviously she didn't breathe fire for reals. It just a metaphor.... me think lolz)
"What's with that look?", I ask. "Listen here bat boy! I'm not gonna let ya suck up to muh puddin' John, got that?!", she said yelling in my face and since I'm already out of character might as well have some fun! "hmmm tsk I don't know~ that's a tough call ta make cause I rather like this John character", I say smirking which seemed to shock her probably from the playful tone in my voice which is unlike batman everyone knows. I smirk as she stalks over to me seemingly bubbling over with rage.
Just as she's about to hit me, that man walks in again with food bags. "I got the goodies~", he says smiling. (A/N: Y'all know that typical John Doe smile if y'all ever seen "Batman: The Telltale Series" 'ight) He sets the food down on a table and comes to untie me, which led to Harley stepping in his way "Are ya crazy?!? Ya can't untie him! He'll just use that as a way to escape!!", she said yelling at him. "Just untying one of his hands. Plus! Brucie wouldn't do that, now would you Bruce?~", he said smirking at me and winks.
Harley slaps him. Hard. Right across the face "YOU IDIOT! OF COURSE HE WOULD TRY TO ESCAPE DUMBASS!! THAT'S THE WHOLE POINT TA WHY HE'S TIED UP!!!" , She yelled and slapped him again but this time harder then punched him a few times as well. She sighed after getting her frustration out on John's poor face. He just sat there on his knees, on the ground, holding his face in his hands in pain. Not gonna lie I feel bad for him. I can tell he's crying by the way his shoulders had started trembling. I turn my focus towards Harley and just glare at her angrily for hurting him.
she looks towards me "What?" I feel myself starting to loose my cool but I try my hardest to stay calm. (A/N: lol it's too hard to keep writing with the slash looking text so ye back to normal) "why would you do that?!", I exclaimed angrily. "Isn't he atleast a friend??" She just scoffed "Yeah sure he's a 'friend' but that don't mean nothin' ta me. He's just my play thing given how naive he is since he's too blinded by his crush on me.", she said which mad me madder but I wouldn't show that outwards. She sighs angrily and with that she left to go check out the equipment I'm assuming that's what she was doing atleast. I pull a trigger on my glove which lets a small knife slide into my hand, I use that small knife to get out of my ropes and I walk towards John who was facing away from me.
I knelt down besides him and put my hand on his shoulder which causes him to jump and turn towards me. "H-how did you-" I cut him off "I have my ways", I said shrugging. He looked at me with a scared look on his face "Harley's gonna get furious if she sees that you're freed", he says starting to tear up a lot more. I sigh and not really knowing what to do I call Gordon on my bat com (A/N: idk what the freak it's called lol which means imma make a few things up if i don't know what they actually called oof don't sue meh please XDDD) "Hey Jim, get your team over here and make sure they don't harm Harley's accomplice because he was most likely just seduced into helping her", I told him when he picked up. "Alright but be careful cause you don't know if it's just an act." I assured him I knew what I was doing and with that I hung up.
Time Skip to when police show up~(also Harley is just outta the pic till a few sentences into this paragraph cause I'm bad at this lol)
The police arrive at the warehouse in a few minutes, Few stationed outside incase anything happens and some came inside to bring Harley back to justice. I stayed with John standing outside of the warehouse waiting for the police to retrieve Harley. After a while the police came out with Harley who was fighting to escape from them but failed regardless of all her flailing around and yelling. She stops once she spots John "You!", she yelled at him and he tried shrinking away from her fiery gaze. "YOU BETRAYED ME! I thought we had somethin' special John, you broke my heart", she said the last part in a voice that seemed sad but was obviously fake. John whimper as he seemed to be mentally fighting with himself. "I'm sorry...", he said in a hushed voice as she walked passed us and was taken away to a cop car where they put her inside the car forcefully.
A/N: If y'all actually want a continuation of this I might put it into a story cause it doesn't make sense in this one I don't think :p