"Good morning, Hazel," I grumbled as I pushed open the doors to the library.
"Well, hello dear!" she exclaimed with a bright smile on her face when she saw me. "How was your day yesterday?"
"Absolutely horrible. You can't take anymore sick days. I forbid it," I said as I approached her desk.
"Oh, do you now?" She raised her eyebrows, and I nodded my head. "Well, before you tell me all about it, how's about we do our little trading tradition first?" she pointed towards the brown plastic bag in my hands.
Its contents were two of my dad's famous PB&J sandwiches. Our deal was that if I traded my sandwiches, she'd trade her latest book recommendation. As much as I loved those sandwiches, I wanted that book Hazel was holding behind her back way more.
"Gimmie, gimmie," I squealed, reaching for the book and handing her the brown bag.
"So, what's up?" she asked, shoving the sandwich into her mouth. I placed the book on the table so I could focus on telling her everything.
"Well, you see, Hazel... there's this boy-"
"Isn't there always," she rolled her eyes as she took a seat. I glared at her. "What did Hunter do this time?"
My train of thought was completely lost at the mention of Hunters name. I had forgotten how much Hunter had grown on Hazel. When I first told her that I liked him, she wasn't his biggest fan. But when she met him for the first time, and saw his smile, I knew she was a goner, just like me.
"No. Not Hunter, Hazel," I said.
"What? What happened?" she asked, sitting up on the edge of her seat, her eyebrows furrowed.
I took a deep breath, bracing myself for this long story. I knew it would hurt me even more to relive it again, but I needed to let it all out.
Just as I opened my mouth, there was a slight knock on the library doors, before someone opened it up and walked in.
"He happened," I whispered to Hazel as Owen started walking towards Hazel's desk. He was wearing a light pink hoodie with his hair pulled back into a hat. I hated how good he looked right now.
"Hey," Owen breathed out as he stopped in front of me, shoving his hands into the pocket of his jeans.
"What are you doing here, Owen?" I asked, keeping my face straight.
"Oh! I think I forgot some books in the back, I'll be right back, James," Hazel said, walking away quickly, leaving us alone. Traitor.
I turned back to face Owen. He was rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly, like he was thinking hard about what to say.
"Um..." he hesitated for a couple of seconds. "I wanted to talk to you about that paper you were supposed to help me with..."
"Oh shit. I completely forgot about that," I thought out loud.
"Yeah, I figured you had," he nodded his head, looking down at the ground. "Honestly I've been going back and forth about bringing it up to you. Ever since yesterday it just doesn't feel right-"
"No. I told you I'd help you," I mumbled.
I knew deep down I was excited, but I shouldn't be. This meant I'd have to spend more time alone with him. And even though it was the one thing I wanted the most, I knew it would only hurt me more.
"You really don't have to if you don't want to. I'd understand."
He looked up at me. I waited a few seconds before whispering, "I want to."
He cleared his throat and nodded his head. "When do you want to work on it?" he asked.
"Um... I'm free tonight actually. Is that good for you?"
"Yeah, tonight's good. I'll come by after practice," he said, fidgeting in his place.
"Cool," I gave him a short smile. He awkwardly smiled back, before taking a couple steps backwards and turning around.
"Well, I'll see ya then," he mumbled over his shoulder on his way out. I waved my hand at him, wanting him to get out of here before I blurted out something, I'd end up regretting later.
Hazel walked back in with a disapproving look on her face.
"I might not know anything about that boy, or anything about you two, but I don't like him one bit," she said sternly.
I rolled my eyes. "Oh Hazel, you don't like anyone."
"That's not true!" she defended.
"Oh, it so is. Remember how much you used to loathe Hunter?"
"He grew on me," she shrugged her shoulders.
"You're biased!" I exclaimed, picking up my book and slightly hitting her shoulder with it.
"Oh hush! Now, go on and tell me all about your boy drama before it's time for class," she said.
"Where to begin?" I thought out loud.
--
Once the bell rang after the last class for the day, people scurried out of the school as fast as they could. Couples were sprawled out in the hallway, sucking face, probably making up for lost time in between classes. Barf.
I made my way through all the chaos and towards my locker. I spotted Austin leaning against the locker next to mine laughing at something someone said. My eyes traveled to the person standing in front of him. It was Owen. Shit.
What was with it and him today? He just seemed to be everywhere.
As I approached them, they both turned their heads to look at me.
"James, dad wants the team to stay late today. Later than usual, so I won't be able to drive you home," Austin said, pushing his body off the lockers and standing up straight.
"Austin!" I exclaimed, completely annoyed.
"Geez, relax. Owen's gonna give you a ride home," he said, pointing his finger towards Owen who was awkwardly standing behind him.
"Funny. Doesn't Owen have practice with you guys?" I asked.
"Dad gave him the day off," Austin shrugged his shoulders. "I'll see you at home. Bye guys!" Austin patted Owen on the back before running off.
This day was not going the way I wanted it to at all. I wanted to hide out in the library all day, but Hazel wouldn't let me. I didn't care. I just wanted to avoid any unplanned run-ins with Owen. Just imagining how awkward that would be made me cringe. But somehow the universe was teaming up against me.
"Uhh... are you ready?" Owen asked.
I nodded my head slowly and said, "just let me get a few things from my locker."
Owen stepped aside, taking the place where my brother was just leaning.
I fumbled with the lock before finally getting it to unlock. I quickly shoved the books I didn't need in and packed up the ones I did need. Once I was done, I slammed the door shut, locking it up, adjusting my back and turning to face Owen. He raised his eyebrows at me. "All done?" he asked, standing up straighter now.
"Yup. Let's go," I said, walking straight past him and towards the school doors.
Even though I was trying to walk fast, his steps were slightly bigger than mine, so he caught up to me in a matter of seconds. We walked silently next to each other. Once we got to his car, he unlocked it and we got it.
"Do you want to listen to anything in particular?" he asked as he started the car. I shook my head, leaned back in my seat and put my seatbelt on.
His car smelt exactly like him. It was overwhelming. I crossed my arms across my chest and looked out the window as I waited for him to start his car, trying to distract myself from the pain in my chest.
After a couple minutes passed and we hadn't moved yet, I turned my head to see what the hold up was. Owen hands were on the steering wheel, he was staring at them, thinking intently.
"James," he finally whispered when he realized I was looking. "I know I'm the last person you want to be with right now, but I just really want you to know how sorry I am, you know, about yesterday-"
"Owen, I'm going to stop you right there. It's fine. Don't beat yourself up about it. You were just being honesty. I appreciate it," I smiled briefly at him.
"Look," he turned in his seat to face me. "I don't want you to hate me. That's actually the last thing I'd want..."
"Don't worry about it. We're good."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah. Now let's get going. I'm starving." I turned my head to look out the window again.
I let out the breath I was holding once Owen's car finally started. I really don't know how I'm going to get through tonight.