Lisa
We finally just graduated. I can't believe that we achieved another milestone.
The moment our head Dean announced to toss our Graduation Hats into the air, we roared in excitement. I have never been this proud of myself before. Even if I didn't graduate as an honor roll student, I am still beyond grateful for who I've become and what I reached at a young age.
"Congratulations my dear, we are so happy for you." as we came out of the auditorium, my Mom haven't stopped crying ever since, now she's holding onto my arm so tight, still shedding some tears of joy.
"Yeah Noona! Finally you can leave this hell like place!" Haruto exclaimed to lift up the mood but only received a smack in the head by our Dad.
"You and your retorts, Haruto. My dearest Princess, come here." I snickered at Haruto who was still rubbing the spot on his head, slowly slipping away from Mom who's still crying by the way. I went up to Dad and hugged him.
"This is the time where your new life will begin. And whatever your decision may be, always know that we will always support you on that."
After I went home from States, I immediately told Dad about everything I witnessed and experienced at Harvard. And his eyes lit up in delight knowing that I fell in love at first sight with the University and its accommodations. He then talked to me about finalizing my decisions and making up my mind because if I do the next step, there's no going back.
And yes, I already made up my mind.
It took me a while to finalize my decisions but.
I am leaving for good, I am going to continue my studies in the States.
"Thanks Dad, Mom and Haruto. I love you guys so much."
"Group hug!" Haruto grabbed Mom and Dad, squishing me in between the 3 of them. We all laughed happily, making this moment count.
While hugging them, I caught a glimpse of Jennie passing by together with her Mother.
Unfortunately, she didn't spare a single glance at me.
I really thought something good is going to happen when I'll confess, but I was so wrong.
The way she looked at me with disgust. Those look on her eyes makes me want to dig up a grave for myself and hide away.
She immediately went home after the incident, I wanted to scream, to shout, to cry until I shed no more tears.
But I can't.
Because I know this is my fault.
It is my mistake for falling in live with my bestfriend.
We never talked to each other ever since, even if when our friends would gather all of us around, she avoids me all the time. Making them wonder and ask me about it, I could only lie to them or either shrug my shoulders.
Speaking of my friends, they are now strutting their way towards me and my family.
I removed myself from their warmth, excusing myself to talk to them.
"Hey guys." I greeted them first, I thought they'll greet me with a fist bump or a high five. But they caught off guard with a big hug.
"We're gonna miss you." Seulgi uttered while burying herself on my chest, Jisoo hugging me by the side rubbing soothing circles on my back.
I informed them about my departure and decision about my future life in the US, and let me tell you this, they have been so supportive of me and never disagreed with my mindset.
"Always talk to us yeah? We'll always be here for you." I didn't plan on getting emotional today because I already settled my mind that everything's going to change after this but we're still going to see each other again.
"No crying remember? If both of you sheds a tear, you'll be treating me a drink." they chuckled and we stepped away from the hug.
I looked at them properly this time, memorizing every feature they have because I'm going to leave them behind and there's no reassurances yet when we'll meet again.
Jisoo never fails to amaze me with her goddess like beauty. The way her lips forms a heart shaped smile whenever she laughs, her dark brown locks that flows easily with the air flowing. Her admirable characteristics and attitude that'll be very hard to find in people these days. Everything about her, about my closest friend, I'll miss it so much.
Then we have Seulgi, the girl who looks like a huggable bear but is a famous womanizer in the campus. Even though she plays with people's hearts, you can always count on her on the hardest times in your life. The way she is so enthusiastic and funny makes me want to disagree with leaving Seoul.
"We'll always be the lucky trio okay? I love you both." A tear flowed down my cheeks as I hugged them once again.
Living my College days without the both of them would be so dull and empty. How can I push through with the challenges I'll face knowing that I don't have these two reliable people by my side?
"See you soon, Cap."
"You guys will still see me, who'll drive me to the airport huh?" its true, it is my last favor from them and gladly they didn't hesitate to oblige.
"Thanks for the wonderful journey guys."
...................................................
The dinner me and my family shared at our very own restaurant was very good. The whole staffs and employees greeted and congratulated me.
Haruto's sulking because I got most of their attention but I reassured him and told him he is going to receive the same thing once he graduates.
We are now just settling inside Dad's office, me and Haruto sitting on the couch paying our attention to our phones while our parents are busy with the resto.
"Noona, I heard that you finally confessed to Jennie Noona." Haruto broke the silence, I looked at him boredly, not wanting to have this kind of conversation.
"Yeah."
"How did it go?" Haruto's been pretty consistent about my feelings towards her, he may not say it but I know that he just wants me to be happy.
Yet what can I do now? I am the opposite of happy.
"It went.. Unexpected, I guess?" he placed his phone down, sitting properly facing towards me.
"Tell me the truth, Noona. I know that I am a pain in the ass but I still care for you." if he wasn't serious right now, I could've gagged and puked, we didn't grow up to express our feelings to each other.
People with siblings can relate.
"She said that its impossible for us to work out. We should just stay as friends. But how can we be friends when she already ignores me?" I never opened to my brother about the happenings in my personal life, we tend to just mind our own business and just talk to each other if its needed.
He sighed deeply making me look at him, he placed his hand on my shoulder then responded.
"Noona, I know I'm not in the place to say this but I think you should choose yourself this time. I mean take this so called rejection as an opportunity to redeem and lift up yourself. If Jennie Noona doesn't see your worth right now, then take this as a motivation to do better. But here's the thing, you should not build a better version of yourself for her, yet do it for you." I knew I could trust my brother, we raised him well.
Come to think of it, he's right. I should not take this rejection as a negative effect but a positive one. I think its best to find myself first and choose myself now.
"Thanks Ruto, didn't know that you got those words up on your mind." He reacted dramatically placing his hand on his chest.
"Excuse me Ms. Manoban! I also have braincells!" I didn't comment anything more and we just laughed it off.
Its time to choose myself this time.
.........................................................
Jennie
Mommy prepared a very delicious meal for my Graduation Dinner. We gathered inside our residences together with Wonwoo's parents. He suggested on having a dinner together with his family so that we can catch up more and we can rewrite the things we lost when we broke up.
I am now washing the dishes while Wonwoo's cleaning the table, meanwhile the parentals are busy having a conversation with glasses of wine on their hands.
As I was drying up the plates, I felt a short tug on my shirt, I looked around and saw Wonwoo smiling cutely at me.
Adorable.
"Hi there cutie." I said while kissing the tip of his nose, he chuckled then leaned back to plant a soft peck on my lips.
"Hey there sexy." I could only roll my eyes at him knowing how he loves to tease me with that kind of compliment.
Noticing how I kind of ignored his comment, he scooted closer and placed his chin on my shoulder.
"Why are you sad, Love?"
"What? Silly, I am not sad." he shook his head,
"Nope, you are indeed sad, is there something bothering you?" I could just sigh deeply as a reply.
Ever since Lisa confessed, I have been feeling not myself lately. Like somehow there was no longer a ball of sunshine on my rainy day. I felt the cold empty breeze in which I never ever felt before.
I don't know why I pushed her away. Maybe just the thought of having my bestfriend fall in love with me doesn't just seemed right?
Or maybe the mere thought of Lisa having feelings for me is so wrong, knowing that I am taken by someone else?
"Just thinking about College, we only have a few months before we enter that chapter." I can feel him smile while wrapping his arms around my waist, pulling me closer.
"Don't worry, Love. You are going to be fine, you're going to do great in that outside world." I turned around, placing my hands around his neck, only a few centimeters away from his lips.
"Really?" he nodded, slowly kissing my hands that he's now holding so tenderly.
"You're Jennie Kim, you can do the impossible."
But loving my bestfriend the way she loves me seems so impossible for me.
"Thank you, Love." I then initiated the kiss, it was just a short, loving kiss. I don't want to get things to intimidated since our parents are here.
"Wait, I kind of noticed earlier that Lisa never came by. I thought she always celebrates occasions here together with her family?" speaking of the person I am trying my best to avoid and forget about what happened, Wonwoo can't just ignore the fact that one of the most important person in my life is not here.
"Uh.. We had an argument." still not releasing to my hold, he raised his eyebrows in confusion.
"You and Lisa? You guys also do arguments?" I playfully hit his chest, what does he think of us? Perfect people? We also have our darkest times.
"We're still humans, Love. We also make mistakes."
"Well that's a bummer. You should really spend quality time with each other before she leaves."
Wait.
What?
Is she leaving?
She decided already?
She didn't even tell me...
"Huh? What are you saying?" he slowly removed his hands around my waist, trying to take hold of my hands in which I let him.
"Haven't you heard? Its kind of a big thing in our batch, the others heard the news from Coach Jiyong." the others know but I don't even have a single damn clue?
"Is this really true, Love? You know how people tend to make up fake stories." he shook his head, now holding to my hand.
But why does our hands don't perfectly fit with each other?
"No, Love. This is true, apparently Coach Jiyong said that Lisa already signed the needed papers for her migration to the States and for her enrollment forms for Harvard."
She's leaving me..
"T-That's surprising." I didn't want to stutter but I can't help it. I am even starting to tear up.
This is what you get Jennie, this is what you get for pushing her away, for not being considerate.
"You guys should really talk. It'll be so sad once she leaves and you didn't even said your goodbyes to each other."
Wonwoo's right.
I need to talk to Lisa.
But how?