Chapter 20
They Don’t Believe In Us
“Hey Hope, have you seen Gee?” Mikeys worried voice echoed down the phone, immediately making my stomach churn; something was wrong.
“N-no? He texted me yesterday night… it went wrong.” I trailed off, everything clicking together in my head.
“Hope, Hope? What went wrong?” Mikey asked a hint of despair in his voice.
“He was going to ask Lindsey to his girlfriend.”
“A-and she said no?”
“I guess so…”
“Oh god, poor Gerard.” Mikey voiced my thoughts.
“Mikey, I’m coming to your house-”
“What?” He intervened, but I had already hung up, intent on speaking to Mikey in person about this.
I almost chuckled at the sound of his clueless voice.
Almost.
Throwing the phone down and pulling on a hoodie I leapt out of the door.
Only mere minutes later I was knocking on Mikey door, hoping – although it was ridiculous – that Gerard would be home.
“Hey Hope,” He greeted me with a little wave, deciding against being polite I wrapped my arms around him in a tight embrace.
“Will he be okay?” My babyish side coming out as I clung to his skinny frame, which was barely supporting my weeping self.
I noticed tear tracks running down Mikeys little face,
“Do your parents know about Gerard?” I asked, unwrapping myself from the uncomfortable hug – note to self, never cling onto people for dear life if they are a pile of skin and bones… it hurts, god dammit elbows.
“No!” He said atrociously, “They would freak, I don’t want Gerard getting in trouble, I thought, well, that we could try and search for him before making It serious?” I nodded at Mikeys suggestion.
“Good thinking Unicorn Boy.” I smiled, “We need to get help searching, I’ll contact Frank and Jamia, and you handle Ray, Bree and Alicia?” He nodded, and immediately we were raping the buttons on our phones, fumbling to contact our friends as quickly as possible.
Oh the wonders of knowing people that care, I thought as Frank picked up immediately.
“This better be good, I’m with Jamia.” He laughed, and I could almost imagine him winking.
“It’s Gerard.” I stated.
“What’s Geetard gone and done now?” I informed Frank of what had happened quickly banishing any sense on humour he had.
“Jamia and I will be there soon.” I nodded – though he couldn’t see it – and closed my phone down, noting that Mikey had already seemed to phone Ray, Bree and Alicia.
“Now we wait.” I stated into the silence, finding it weird when I settled down on the chair without Gerard near me.
“M-mom,” Mikey cleared his throat, making his voice clearer, “Mom did say when she got home last night she heard Gerard in the bathroom and a really loud crash… a-and that the Jack and Vodka was gone. Then she said Gerard went out the house, she thought he was going to yours or something?” Mikey chewed on his lip dangerously.
“He never usually drinks, does he?” Mikey shook his head, “Not much a least,” I continued, “and he did text me because I suggested we should meet up, after the Lindsey thing – and he said maybe later, but he never got back to me, I guessed he was okay.” I informed Mikey, hearing a ring at the door I guessed it was Frank, as he only lived down the road from here.
I was at the door literally seconds later, wrenching it open to be greeted by Frank and Jamia worried faces.
“Why would she do that to him?!” Frank burst out as soon as he stepped inside.
“Has anyone spoken to her?” Frank continued, if only Gerard knew how much we cared about him, we need to show him that we can help him through this.
“I thought we should wait until we’ve got Gerard and asked him about it.” I gave my opinion, which every nodded at. Woo, everybody respects me.
“Fine, but to be honest I presumed they were already dating? Didn’t anyone else?” Jamia asked, which earned another nod from everyone else.
“He was always telling me how much he truly thought he loved her, and he thought she felt the same, he wanted to ask her out for weeks now, but he waited for the perfect time – I truly thought she would say yes.” I grumbled, Gerard is my best friend, and Lindsey has hurt him after everything she said to him, putting him under a false illusion.
“I think this is something that they should both sort out, although I may go and have a little chat with Lyn…” Jamia suggested, and I grimaced slightly at the nickname for Lindsey that Gerard had made up for her, that time when I felt that both Gerard and Lindsey were leaving me out and I strongly disliked her.
It reminded me of those times that although Gerard was with other people me and him were always going to be strong, faithful friends – he would do anything for me, now this was my time to do something to help him.
Luckily, just on cue we heard a knock on the door, Ray, Bree and Alicia. Mikey went into cling tightly to Alicia, whilst I informed them of the situation, it felt wrong talking about Gerard like this, honestly none of us knew where he could possibly be, If he’d had something to drink he could be stumbling along New Jersey in a drunken state, or he may simply be sitting on the streets, who knows?
“The only evidence we have is that Donna heard Gerard go out the door last night and he didn’t return, and apparently he had taken two bottle of drink, and that… Lindsey said no.”
I felt somehow awful saying that; almost if I didn’t say it, it wouldn’t come true, I could barely comprehend how he must be feeling.
“Well we better get looking.” Ray piped up, these boys and their girlfriends all cared about Gerard, he was one of us and we all wanted him to happy and safe.
“It’s like looking for a needle in a hay stack.” Alicia stated, voicing what all of us where thinking; how on earth are we going to find him?
“Has anyone even tried his mobile?” Frank stated the obvious, pulling out his mobile and phoning Gerard; whose contact name, I noticed, was ‘Gee xoxo’.
I literally must have face palmed myself, goddammit Hope!
Frank turned it on loud speaker and all seven of us crowded around Frank’s phone, patiently waiting for any type of answer.
After about eight rings I’m sure that I could have bashed that phone in with the suspense of everything.
Please pick up Gerard, please.
I begged silently in my head, I let out a frustrated, “Come on!”
“H-hello?” A groggy voice answered,
“Gerard!” I shouted, grabbing the phone from Frank rather forcefully.
“Gerard? Gerard? Are you okay?” I could hear him moaning little incoherent words.
“N-no,” He stumbled over his words, “My head hearts, and my heart.” I realised he didn’t mean it literally and I felt my own heart pang a little.
“Gerard, where. Are. You?” Frank spoke slowly, worry evident in his cracking voice.
“On… the floor, n-near the comics?” He questioned.
“Please stay there? I’m really worried about you Gerard, everything will be okay.”
“O-okay?” His voice sounded tired, groggy and cracked. I must say he sounded slightly drunk… or at least hung over.
“We’re on the way; I’m not hanging up this phone.” I completely forgot that I had basically stolen Frank’s phone and spoken to Gerard myself although everyone else was also insanely worried about him.
I heard a muffled sound, like a yawn, then a slight ‘bang’ and more muffled voices.
“Wh-where is the phone?” I heard Gerard question himself in his drunken state; I just stood and listened, knowing full well that he had dropped it.
“Hey, Gerard I’m-”
“Who said that?! Who spoke? Who…?” He made a sad noise, and I sighed.
“Gerard, I’m down here.” I would kill to know what he is doing right now and next to comics – what does that even mean? Knowing him he is passed out in a motherfucking comic store, the guy in their never pays attention.
“You’re a small person? Cool. I like midgets… like Frank.” He voiced wistfully, by this time we were all listening, and Frank blushed slightly.
Wait, comic store guy.
“Bert!” I cried, causing Gerard on the other end to have an outburst.
“I’m not Burt, my name is… Gerard?”
I ignored Gerard for a second to speak to Frank, Mikey, Jamia and Alicia.
“He’s by comics, and to be honest I only know one comic store guy that knows Gerard and is awesome enough to let his basically pass out on the floor.”
“Bert McCracken!” Frank blurted, that guy was a legend, truth be told, and he sold his comics for a freaking good price.
Gerard was still mumbling incoherent words on the other end, but I ignored them, they wouldn’t have made sense anyway.
“Ugh, it’s going to take forever to get there,” Alicia complained, pulling a whining Mikey along.
“Yeah, my feet ache!” Mikey cried, pouting softly.
“Not my fault we are all a bunch of sixteen year old pusses that can’t drive yet, and, remember why we are doing this.” I glared at Mikey, “For your brother, in case you had forgotten, fat turd.” I joked, for a skinny guy he sure hated exercise. Then again, who doesn’t in this day and age?
Frank seemed as intent as ever, and all of our hopes had risen after we realised Gerard must be with Bert McCracken, he was a good guy – although he often let smoking and drinking get in the way of his future ambitions. He inspired to be a rock star; he even had a band called The Used, but he never seemed in the right state of mind to achieve his goal.
The walk into centre New Jersey was a tiring one, we all anticipated the moment we could see Gerard, and we prayed to god that he was okay, maybe only a little hung over; that would be the worst of his injuries, right?
‘Bert’s Comics’ a wonky sign read. I’d only been in here a handful of times, only to pick up the latest issue of a new comic that Gerard was into, he’d even asked Bert to order some new ones in a couple of times – so you could say they were friends.
“Gerard? Gerard?” Frank stormed in first, I noticed Bert wasn’t sitting at the counter like he usual was, in the five times I had visited this store.
But what I did notice, was a scratchy voice; singing.
“As we trudge along through the mud and we tried to call it home, but we weren't alright, not at all not for one for one for one second.” Someone softly screamed the emotion shone clearly like a star.
“Bert?” Frank approached where the figure was singing; Gerard was perched on the floor, still staring disbelievingly at the phone.
“Hey guys, I’ve kept Gerard safe here, he’s a little hung over, I offered him a fag though – thought it would be fun for us to get drunk together, but he was already heavily intoxicated when I got here so I decided to look after him instead.” He smiled widely, sweeping his greasy hair out of his face.
“Did you like the song? It’s the only one I’ve written so far; I’ve decided to call it Maybe Memories.” Bert grinned again, producing a cigarette from his pocket and lighting it in a quick, swift movement.
I smiled quickly at Bert, trying to ignore the smell of his cigarette and the heavy smell of alcohol that blanketed the whole shop.
“Thanks,” I smiled as he headed back to the front of the shop, looking out for customers that he never received.
I looked down at Gerard, and had to admit, he looked pretty terrible. I could tell he wasn’t too hung over or drunk anymore – he just looked tired, and hurt.
Frank had an arm slung around him and was talking to him in rushed motions, Mikey was also perched in front of him, his skinny arms slung around him.
“Hey Gerard,” I whispered softly, my heart breaking for him. I reached my hand out for his, to pull him up, but his grip was so weak, so I pulled him up by his wrist.
“Shit!” He mumbled slightly, as he stumbled around, “Ow.”
I pulled my hand away, shocked at his behaviour – when I felt a gooey substance on my hand where I had gripped his wrist.
Please God, don’t let it be what I think that is. I silently prayed.
Blood.
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This is my comeback chapter, okay, so I really hope you enjoyed this little chapter after about three months. It's not the best, but that's okay because I've been very stuck on this book and wrote this chapter in a mere few hours, so yaaaay.
I'd like to thank @JustAGhostInTheSnowx for (kind of) encouraging me to continue writing and to get on with uploading.
Once again, thanks for sticking with me all of you, and expect more excitement/uploads in the next few weeks, unless writers block strikes its venomous poison at me again, then feel free to revive me from that death, please?