(a/n I am having Maddie 'write' another song. This one is I Think I'm In Love Again by Kat Dahlia. I think it fits her and Reggie's relationship so well. I am skipping the bridge completly though. Enjoy! :))
I finally get the will to get out my bed and walk to my closet. I serch for something to wear. I land on a simple pair of hoghwaisted jeans and my green day tee. I tuck in the front if the tee into the jeans before sliding my socks on checkered vans on.
I look skinnier. Great. Dad is going to think that I am not eating. I sigh. My good mood has been ruined by the reminder if the car talk. I wish I had his jacket though. I like the smell and it was comforting. It was the closest thing I could get to a hug from him. Ugh. I have to stop thinking about him.
...
I was able to get through the first three classes with no issues. I stop at my locker on my way to the music room for my free period. I have to thank Mrs. Harrison for the guitar. I was not able to go to this mornings lesson because I had to make up a test so I figured I would talk to her now. I open my locker and open my bag. I start to put my books in before I notice a pair of shoes that look awefully familar on the other side.
"So, your boyfriend the one on drums or bass? Because I am pretty sure your sister has the one on electric taken." Jay says. I smile at the comment about Julie and Luke.
"Why do you care?" I aks shutting my locker.
"Because, I like you. And if I like something, I normally get it. So not having you is eating me alive." he says.
"You don't like me. You like that you were able to use me. But I have grown up and moved on. I realize what you did and the way you did it. You used my mother's death to trick me. You know how sick that is." I say. He looks shocked as a few students start to pay attention. "Yeah, everyone deserves to know what you did. So everyone listen up, Jay Wilson used me and my mother's death to get me to go out with him and then he abused me but tricked me and told me he was helping." I say and eveyone looks at us. They all looked shocked. His group of friends slowly started to leave. "I am tired of you using everyone you call friends. They deserved to know." I say. I turn around and walk around the corner in the direction of the music room.
"What in the world has gotten into me. The moment the boy showed up, I felt happier, I gained more confidence, and I fell in love. I don't what they did to me but it is a good thing, I don't think I could ever loose them." I whisper to myself as I walk into the music room.
"Mrs. Harrison. Do not get me wrong, I love it and thank you but why did you do it?" I say as I walk into her office.
"I overheard you talk about that guitar for ages. You had a picture of it in your locker since you were a freshman. I thought you would want it." she say matter of factly.
"It is perfect but how, why?" I say.
"I need you to keep singing and playing. I can't have you give up on your passion ever agian so I gave you an excuse, plus that Reggie fellow, I hear you talk to your sister about seems to have a little help with that too." She says and I stop.
"Oh my goodness. You are just a little evesdropper aren't you." I say with a laugh. "But yeah he does. Actually all three of the memeber of mine and Julie's band have helped tremendusly. They helped get back into the program, they helped us write more music." I say.
"Well, I still do not understand, how you get those holograms to work." She says.
"It is kinda complicated, but it is fun. They are real people, they live in Sweeden and then we project them over here." I say using the same stupid lie Julie used.
"Really?" Mrs. Harrison says.
"Yeah, they are really talented though." I say.
"Oh, I have to go, bye, Mrs. H." I say.
"Bye, Mads. And remember keep singing." she says. I smile and walk out of her office to see Julie at the piano still in her black dress for dance. She is playing a melody with a giddy smile on her face. Then Flynn walks in.
"There you are. Why did you run out of dance so fast?" She says walking over to the piano. Julie stops immediatly and stiffins when she hears a voice but calms back down when she notices it is just Flynn.
"And what are you doing in here?" I ask following Flynn to sit next to them on a stool next to the piano.
"Well, it was pretty intense in there." Julie says.
"Oh, I noticed." Flynn says, excitedly. I roll my eyes. "Dancing with your crush can do that to a girl." She says.
"You are dancing with Nick?" I interject and Julie nods.
"Well then entire time me and Nick were dancing I was thinking about Luke." She says fliping a peice of hair behind her ear. I smile.
"You really like Luke." I tease poking her.
"Okay I know you alway want what you can't have but Luke... and Reggie are next level." Flynn says snapping both of us back into reality.
"I know... but." I start.
"Nope. No buts. The thing is, when you are preforming you have to avoid those, big, beuatiful, dead, eyes." She says. "And that is for both of you." she points at me and Julie.
"Your pushy today." Julie says. I smile.
"You're welcome." Flynn smiles back.
"Now, I want ice cream. Let's go." Flynn says standing and grabing both of our hands and walking out of the music room.
"You two go change and I will meet you out front." I say playing with the keys. They run off to the locker rooms and I walk outside. I sit in my car and pull the sunset curve cd out of my glove compartment. I look down at the picture of the boys. They have not changed a bit. I flip open the case and slide it in. I start to listen and then Luke and Alex appear in my backseat.
"What are you doing here?" I say to the both of them turning off the music.
"Nice music choice." Luke says with a smirk.
"We wanted to ask you a question. It might be a little bit uncofortable but we need to know." Alex says very serious.
"Okay shoot." I say turning to look at them.
"What did you and Reggie talk about yesterday after the gig?" Luke says.
"Why do you need to know?" I ask looking down.
"Because Reggie says he refuses to play the bass and he is in the studio right now crying because he thinks you hate him." Alex says after a moment of silence.
"Oh." I say.
"Well..." Luke says.
"He reminded me that I told him I liked him then and I cut him off by saying and I quote, 'But nothing can happen.'" I say quietly. They look at eachother before Luke poofs away. Alex poofs into the front seat. A tear rolls down my face.
"I did not mean to hurt him and I am not mad. I am in love." I say barely above a whisper.
"People do stupid things when they are in love." Alex says. I let out a small laugh.
"I know. I am stupid, crazy, in love." I say leaning back.
"Hey, there is nothing wrong with being in love. I am. I understand why and what you said. Nothing can happen. No one but you and Jules can even see us let alone hear us and you can't touch. It is impossible." Alex says. Tears continue to roll down my cheeks. "Luke understands the same pain. He really likes Julie. He came to visit Julie at school today and when he came back he was so happy I thought he was loopy." he says. I smile. "That is better. Gosh, this best friend thing is hard when I can not give you a hug." He says making me smile even wider.
"Trust me I know." I say. Julie and Flynn both walk out. Luke poofs back out into the back seat.
"He is mess." Luke says. I sigh.
"I got it. Just keep Julie out of the studio for a little bit okay." I say. He nods and Alex and Luke poof. Julie and Flynn get in.
"Yeah, I am fine." I say, I pull out and start to drive towards the house when Flynn reminds me of the promise I made to get them ice cream. I quickly get them their ice cream and a small milkshake for myslef. I make back home and FLynn and Julie walk inside. I hear a soft muffle of Alex and Luke talking but when they see me they poof into Julie's room.
I walk into the studio and see Reggie sitting on the couch. He snaps up when he sees me and fixes he shirt.
"Oh, hey, Mads." he says in a soft voice.
"Hey." I say finally letting go of the door. "Luke and Alex told me you were out here." I walk over and sit next to him.
"Oh they did." Reggie says with a slight annoyance in his voice.
"Yeah, but they are worried about you. But so am I. They told me that you are not playing the bass. What is that about and what is the thing about you thinking I am mad at you?" I ask. He rufuses to look at me. So I move. He looks away but I keep moving until he eventually can not look away fast enough and we lock eyes. He does not look away.
"I don't want to play unless I play with you. I thought you were mad that I brought up the fact you told me so I gave up." he says looking away, inocently. I smile.
"I will play with you and I am not mad. I am just confused on the whole feelings thing. I mean I did not even think ghost were real a month ago and know I am best friends and I like one." I say. He looks up at me.
"I love you, Maddie." He say quietly. I am shocked by this. I did not know how to react to this. I mean I love him too but I can't tell him. I stood up and walked out. That was a stupid reaction. I run into the house and into Julie room.
"Major problem." I say and Luke, Alex, Flynn, and Julie all look at me. I am hypervenilating and I feel like I am going to pass out. I start to shake and pace back and forth and then everything goes black.
-Reggie POV-
Alex and Luke poof into the studio with a paniced look on their face. I hear Julie yell and then the door slam.
"What is going on?" I ask.
"Something is wrong with Ma-." Alex starts and I poof to Ray's car. I see a limp Maddie next to Carlos and Julie in the car. She looks pale.
"Dad... I am going to call the band reall fast." Julie says pulling out her phone. She plays with a few buttons before putting it to her ear.
"Hey, Reggie." She says.
"Hey." I say. I try to hold onto Maddies hand but I go right through. A tear rolls down my cheek.
"What's wrong?" I ask almost scared for the answer.
"We dont know what happened but Maddie passed out. She hit her head. We are on our way to the hospital." Julie says staring straight at me, but I won't take my eyes off Maddie. Ray is speeding through the streets. We are silent for a moment.
"It will be okay Jules." I say finally looking up.
"Okay, thanks Reggie. She will." Julie says with a soft smile. It is silent for the rest of the short ride. Ray pulls in and runs to the side of the car and Carlos gets out so Ray can pick up Maddie. I poof back to the studio.
"I did this. I scared her. I freaked her out. She could not handle me telling her that.. why did I do that." I say rocking back and forth. Alex walks up to me.
"Reggie. What are you talking about... you did nothing wrong." He says.
"I told her that I loved her and she got scared and ran out... she is at the hospital because if me!" I say a little to loudly. Alex steps back and I realize I yelled. "Alex, I am sorry. I just..."
"I know its okay." Alex says.
"I just... got to go clear my head." I say. I poof out of the studio and to the beach. I walk the ocean side for at least a few hours before I sit on a bench. After a few minutes, I see a couple walking hand and hand the opposite direction and I envy them.
I poof the the hospital and walk behind the desk to see the room chart. I see her name in bold letters and I poof to the room. I is Julie in the room at the time with her.
"Just a second." I say and poof to the studio.
"Come on. Julie needs us." I say. We all poof into the room and Julie smiles at us before looking back at Maddie. I sit in the seat next to the bed and set my head on my arms on her bed. Watching her. Luke sits next to Julie and they softly talk. Alex sits silently on the floor in the corner. We sit in silence for a while before Ray walks through the door.
"Anything?" he says to Julie, she shakes her head. Ray sighs and plops down into the only empty seat on the other side of Maddie.
"So, what to do now?" Julie says to Ray and I sigh.
"Pretend I am not in love." I whisper and Julie gasps. I thought it was at me but I look at her and she is looking at Maddie.
"Where am I? And why am I so uncofortable?" she says in a weak and shaky voice.
"You are at the hospital, Mads. Do you remember anything?" Ray says walking up to her and setting his hand by her head.
"I will go get a nurse." Julie says.
-Maddie POV-
(during 'sleep')
I walk through a dark room. I see small shapes but I can not make anything out. I see a small light. It is focused on a light switch. I flip it and the entire room eurupts in white light. My eyes focus and I am on stage with Julie and the band. Julie starts to play a song I have never heard before yet I know by heart. I start to sing.
I sing the last line before I open my eyes. I hear something in the distance. A soft mumble of Julie and Dad talking. I am confused. I look at Julie she is not talking. I realize I am in my own. I need to get out. The voices are trying to trap me. Everything around me fades and I am in the halls of the school.
"I can not believe that you got kick out of the band." Someone says. I feel the pain in my chest and I could not help but start to tear up. I keep walking through as people throw comments at me. I feel someone next to me but no one is there. I still hear the muffled talking every once and awhile but it is faint. I walk through the halls for a long time before I finally break as one more person comments. "You will never be accepted back into your family." I start to cry harder and I stop and close my eyes.
"It is not real." I say. My eyes flutter open.
"Where am I? And why am I so uncofortable?" I say noticing dad and Julie sitting in chairs along the wall. Reggie is next to me and Luke is next to Julie. Alex is in the corner, but all of them seem to lunge foward as they hear my voice.
"You are at the hospital, Mads. Do you remember anything?" Dad says setting his hand on my head. I remember everthing so vividly.
"I will go get a nurse." Julie says.
"From before or during?" I ask. The nurse walks in and flashes me a smile. Reggie is still at my side.
"Hi, hun. I am Sarah. I have been taking care of you." she says. I give her a weak smile. I just woke up and yet I really tired.
"Hi." I mummble.
"So, I don't want to over work you but I need to ask you a few questions." Sarah says. I blink a few times.
"Okay." I say weakly.
"Do you remember what happened before you fell?" she asks.
"Yes." I try to say loudly but it comes out as a small whisper.
"Did you dream when you were asleep?"
"Yes." I whisper.
"Can you tell me what happened before and durning?" she says sweetly.
"Yeah. Well before I was talking to Reggie, my bandmate. Then I came up to Julie's room. I was hyperventilating because... he... he said he love me." I say and Dad perks up slightly.
"He what?" He says a little too loudly. A wave of pain hits me like a ton of bricks and I wince. He looks down concered.
"Dad, not right now." Julie says and he sits back down. Julie nods at me.
"Then I started to pace and then it went black. I walked around what seemed to be a black room until I saw a switch. I flipped it on and Julie and the band appeared on a stage with me. A crowd surrounded the stage. I sang a song, I had never heard, yet I feel like I know it by heart." I smile at the thought. "Then I heard Julie talking although her mouth was not moving. That is when I realized I was trapped in my head. After that I walked through the halls of the school. People told me that I was kicked out of the band and my family over and over again for what seemed like foreer then I woke up." I say tiredly. Reggie looks at me with curious eyes. I close my eyes for a moment. I hum the lyrics.
"Well, I think we need to run a few test but you need to get some rest first." she says. I smile.
"Thank you." Dad says standing as Sarah starts to walk out of the room.
"Yes, thank you." I mumble. Sarah leaves. "Okay, now, I feel wierd having all of you staring at me as I sleep." I say in a soft voice.
"Okay we will be in the waiting room." Dad says kissing my forhead.
"Actually can you do me a favor?" I ask.
"Sure anything." Dad says.
"I need a few things. I need my journal and my pencil case." I say with a big smile. Dad laughs.
"Okay. I will have Julie get them for you." He says. I blink but don't open my eyes. I drift off to a soft sleep.
"Good morning." I hear a familiar voice say as I sit up. I look over at the clock on the bedside table and sigh.
"Is it really four thirty in the morning." I say to Reegie.
"Yeah, but then again. I have been staring at you since well I got here so time is irrelevent." he says and I immeditaly feel bad.
"I scared everyone. I feel so bad." I say throwing my head into my hands.
"Hey no, that is not what I meant. I mean I am the one that put you here." he says back.
"What no. You are not the cause of this, Reg." I say and he smiles. "What is that smile for?"
"You called me, Reg." he says and I realize that I did.
"I am sor-" I start.
"No, I like it." He says cutting me off. "Oh, your dad brought your journal in after you fell asleep." he says pointing to the nightstand. I see my journal, pencil case, and my phone and charger. I smile slightly. I grab the journal and flip to a blank page. I start to wirte the lyrics down from last nights dream.
I'm trying hard to trust you
When you say 'give me your hand'
Baby, I'm falling
I hope you catch me when I landI think I'm in love again
I smile as I write the words.
"What was so important that you had to have your journal here?" Reggie asks.
"Well, you heard me explain what happened, I apparently wrote a sing in dream land and I needed to write it down before I forgot everything." I say holding the pen to my mouth. I avoid making eye contact with him and make sure he can not read it over my shoulder. He would know it was about him.
I played soft music for the rest of the few hours it was just me and Reggie. I worte the lyrics down and was able to get the whole thing down before the nurse came in and told me that I had to have an MRI done before I could go home. I got up and my head still slightly hurt but it was okay. I walked down with the nurse to the MRI and we took care of it. Then they let me get changed into clothes that dad got me and let me go home.
...
I walk down the stairs with Julie to hear dad singing Finally Free. I smile. Then I notice Reggie talking to dad. My mood changes and I shift from foot to foot. I was a little confused about us. It has been two days since the accident and we have not talked or even hung out in the same room for longer than like five minutes. It is almost like he does not want to see me. Julie notices my mood change but I brush her off.
"Well this is new?" Julie says directed to Reggie.
"Yeah, I figured I would make some breakfast." Dad says. Reggie looks at me and I look away causing Dad to look confused. He shrugs and moves on.
"He thought you were talking to him." Reggie says. "Yeah, me and your dad are pals now it is a little one sided but... it works." He says looking up at him. I smile.
"So, girls I was thinking that I may have ruined your chance you had with that manager." Dad starts and Julie cuts him off.
"Dad no, I should have never snuck out." She says.
"And we both should have told you about the band." I say and Julie nods. Reggie looks at us.
"Let the man speak, he has been stress eating all week. I don't know where he puts it though. It is like... firm." He says motioning to Ray's stomach. I roll my eyes.
"Well, I felt bad so I called in a few favors and I booked you a local gig." He says throwing up finger guns. Reggie gives Ray a smile.
"Best dad ever." Reggie says.
"Oh, cool. Did you call your buddy from Drakes?" Julie says.
"Um, no. I called Flynn. She is going to help us throw a party here." Dad says.
"I may have been a little early with the best dad ever award." he says looking at the food on the counter.
"You booked us a gig at our house?" I ask.
"Hear me out. You preform with your band and I get a few of my colegues to put you on film so you have something professional for your Youtube." he says with a small smile.
"You would do that for us?" Julie asks.
"Yeah." Ray says and we both smile.
"Back to best dad ever. I'll go tell the guys." Reggie says leaving the counter and walking towards the back door. "Have a good day at work, Ray. It is okay, you don't have to awnser." He says with a slight frown. I laugh and me and Julie walk out and head to the car and off to school. Somehow the news about the incident spread through the school so everyone was cautios around me. Except for Jay and his gang, they were cracking jokes. Until Mrs. Harrison caught them. She put them down for good. It was funny to watch.
"I have a question for you." Mrs. Harrison says after scaring away Jay.
"Okay?" I say consernd.
"Do you want to preform at the school assembly tomorrow?" she asks.
"Well, I would have to ask the band but-" I start.
"No, Mads, just you. I know that you and your sister a duo but I want you to preform and I want you to do a solo." She says.
"I mean, okay." I say after a moment. She smiles and wraps me in a hug. She realeses me and jumps exitedly. I laugh.
...
I get home later and open my journal to the song I wrote in the hospital. "Why not?" I ask myself.