Fanart by ccelinavv on twitter
hey people of wattpad that read sad shit about boo.
This is a part two!!
The first part is before this so go read that or this won't really make sense haha
Also im considering doing a face reveal when we hit 6k reads. If i do it please dont sexualize me. I am a minor and it makes me uncomfortable.
Im not really gonna vent in this one but the manipulative parts may be venting. The part with sewerslide are not vents! I would never vent about something i haven't done. That is very disturbing if you do. And very very offensive to those who have tried/have committed it :( stay safe pls
Anyways major trigger warning!!
•sewerslide/thoughts
•major SH
•manipulation
•body dysphoria
•Lots of hate and rude comments
If you are not comfortable with reading this or these are your triggers please for the love of satan, SKIP THIS. I would absolutely hate if my writing got someone to relapse. Please stay safe for ranboo :)
Go drink some water before you read this. I am before writing. Eat a snack too. You need to try.
I have my water pog.
_________________________
I wake up around 9:30 in the morning and get on my pc and do all my online school shit.
I slightly fall asleep but get awoken by the teacher calling my name
'James?'
I unmute
'Here'
I remute.
'Only 7 more hours of this hell the i can sleep then stream' i thought as i was doing a essay on a murderer that i was not interested in.
.
.
.
Its around 7:35 pm. I finished up my online classes and was setting up my stream.
I stream for around 4-5 hours at a time. Starting around 7-10 at night. It can be draining especially since i have online classes. I want to take a break but ive been streaming everyday since 2 months ago and i would absolutely love to make it to 4 months atleast. Its not very god for my health but i love my fans and their lives matter most to me. I love them all. Ive tried to commit suicide multiple times but ended up thinking about how my fans would react. 'Famous Twitch streamer, James _____, also known as Ranboo committed suicide last night and was found in his bathroom.' Wow that is really something aint it.
I look at my chat asking where i am. And hi's and hello's like usual but theres way more fucking hate.
'What the fuck..?' I murmur.
'Why do people watch you??'
'Ewwww'
'Kys'
'Nobody wants you here. Not even your stupid 'fans' god youre so dumb'
'Ranboo. You deserve absolutely nothing that you have. Youre stealing tubbo from tommy. You are a disgrace to this smp and us fans. I fucking hate you. I wish you were never born. Kill. Your. Self.'
That last one really hurt. I usually don't listen to hate but that one got me. I unmute. 'Hey chat!! Sorry i was called down by my mom. Ill be back in a minute!!'
I walk to my bathroom and grab the blade in my mirror cabinet thing. I slice one then two then three then four etc..
It hurt but felt good and the same time.
I clean everything up and put the razor and bandages away and go back to my stream.
'Hey chat!! So sorry for the wait!! I was.. uh.. i was making sure my facecam was centered and i couldnt figure out how to center it correctly haha! And yes today is a facecam stream!!'
I didnt really wanna do a facecam stream but i didn't wanna raise suspicion.
.
.
.
I end stream and just double check cause you should do that just in case. (Im looking at you smut writers-author)
I roll back in my chair and take off my glasses and mask. Jesus there was a lot of hate. Maybe i should listen to them. You know, kill myself. I grab a piece of paper and a pen.
'Hello whoever is reading this!! If you are i committed the unthinkable!! Sure its an easy way out but it hurts. Everything hurts. I dont wanna do this anymore. My story will always end will sadness and death even when it began with birth and happiness. Everything hurts. My wrists, my head, my body, even my bones. I dont have motivation to do anything, well except stream. God what am i doing right? Well mother or father you may be reading this and hello!! I fucking hate you both. Manipulative fucking bastards are what you are. If you are wondering where my body lies it is in the bathroom on the floor. I died alone and cold. My death wish is for you to message the dream SMP groupchat on my pc, okay? Tell them 'hello! This is ranboos mother(or father) and Ranboo has committed suicide. He was so good at acting because he was going through all the things that were happening to himself and even tommy while he was in exile. In his death note he wished that whichever of you in the popular-est speak on his death saying 'ranboo is no longer with us. He committed the unthinkable. He will be missed' he said they dont have to put "he will be missed" if they dont want to. Im sorry for all of your loss.' Good day.'
I finish the letter by signing my name. I set it on my desk and lock my door. I head to the bathroom and cut deep. I had never cut too deep so it hurt quite alot. I cut into a vein then two then three. Im now on the floor dying slowly. This isnthow i planned to go but to late. I see black dots spot my vision and i take my last breath.
POV CHANGE
RANBOOS MOM POV
'James! Get down here'
No response 'james?!'
I walk up to his room. And try opening the door. Its locked. Ugh. I cared for James but he could be slightly annoyin and his dad comes home around 4 am every night and i take my anger out on him. I heavily regret it. Good thing his dad never hit him.
I open the door with a knife since it doesnt take a key. I notice a note on his desk and i read it.
'Hello whoever is reading this!! If you are i committed the unthinkable!! Sure its an easy way out but it hurts. Everything hurts. I dont wanna do this anymore. My story will always end will sadness and death even when it began with birth and happiness. Everything hurts. My wrists, my head, my body, even my bones. I dont have motivation to do anything, well except stream. God what am i doing right? Well mother or father you may be reading this and hello!! I fucking hate you both. Manipulative fucking bastards are what you are. If you are wondering where my body lies it is in the bathroom on the floor. I died alone and cold. My death wish is for you to message the dream SMP groupchat on my pc, okay? Tell them 'hello! This is ranboos mother(or father) and Ranboo has committed suicide. He was so good at acting because he was going through all the things that were happening to himself and even tommy while he was in exile. In his death note he wished that whichever of you in the popular-est speak on his death saying 'ranboo is no longer with us. He committed the unthinkable. He will be missed' he said they dont have to put "he will be missed" if they dont want to. Im sorry for all of your loss.' Good day.'
What? I open his bathroom seeing him on the floor blood absolutely everywhere. I sigh knowing he is long gone. I type out the message he wanted his friends to see. I get responses almost immediately.
'What?!' From Karl
'Your kidding right?' From a tommy?
'Ranboo stop playing around like that. Thats not funny' from a tubbo
I type out: 'this isnt a joke. I would never joke about my sons death.'
'You've gotta be kidding me' from dream
I see that he got a twitter notification and i click it the username is dreamwastaken?
dreamwastaken: hello everyone.. so i just wanted to come on here and say we've lost a smp member and he will be very very missed. Ranboo he committed the unthinkable and is no longer with us. Ive already decided we are gonna make an entire memorial for him in the Dream SMP. This isnt lore whatsoever and wasnt planned but, i will come out of the prison for only this day and then will got back. :(
Time to plan a funeral.
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Words:1,288
Im not sure if im gonna make a part 3 of the funeral but i may. This took a long ass time to write and i didnt cry surprisingly
Im definitely not proof reading this so if there are spelling error deal with it bitch ♡
I hope you.. enjoyed??
Stay safe!!
-toby