I take a deep breath. In and out.
First off, I want to say how much I love you, my darling little girl. I'm sure you hate me and rightfully so, but please, hear me out.
Your mother was a death eater. I don't know exactly how she got to being a supporter of the Dark Lord, but it happened sometime.
Back then, she was a different person. She was kind and fair, but sometime after we got married she changed.
For the time I knew her before then she seemed to resent the death eaters and all they stand for, despite being one. I didn't think it was entirely her choice, though I'm not sure whose it was.
However, something changed. I knew she had a difficult upbringing, but something was off.
She was rude and cruel. She kept secrets. She was involved in something she wouldn't tell me about. I found out later it was a plot to help the Dark Lord.
She was involved in trying to murder Harry Potter and successfully killing James and Lily.
That was when you had just turned one.
When I found out about her involvement, that was the last straw.
I loved you more than you could know, but I couldn't take you with me. You were only a baby.
It must have been difficult to grow up in a house with just her, but it would be much more dangerous for you to come with me.
I am leaving this letter with my good friend Narcissa. I wanted to wait until you were older to read this.
I am going on a mission. The Dark Lord is still alive, I know it. I need to track him down.
I hope to one day see you again.
I'm sorry for leaving you all alone.
Love,
Your Father, Amory
"Can I...?" Draco asks gesturing to the paper.
I nod and absentmindedly hand it to him.
I am in shock.
My father didn't just leave because he didn't care about me and couldn't stand my mother.
He was trying to help.
I want to meet him. It doesn't seem fair that I don't remember knowing my father.
Draco hands me back the letter. He wipes away a tear trickling down my cheek that I didn't know was there.
That was when I lost it. I wrap my arms around him, and start sobbing into his chest. Hesitantly, he holds me back.
I don't know why I'm crying, I feel relieved. I was convinced it was my fault my dad left. I thought he couldn't handle my mom and didn't care enough about me to bring me along.
I've never known a parent to care about me.
"Are you okay?" Draco asks.
"Yes. I feel great."
He hugged me tighter.
"I am kind of tired though."
"C'mon then love, let's go to sleep."
We lay down on his bed, and this time Draco stroked my hair until I drifted off to sleep.
...........................................................................
My mother says "happy birthday" to me when she saw me at dinner. Narcissa and Draco had a small celebration for me after dinner. She baked a cake for me.
My mother never made me deserts. She told me I would get even fatter.
The cake was delicious and slightly lopsided, but I loved it. Draco's birthday is in a few hours. I was born June 4th 1980, and Draco was born June 5th 1980. So naturally I have to lord the fact that I'm a day older over him.
"You are such a young child." I say, as we are walking back to his room.
"You are literally less than 24 hours older than me."
"Don't worry about math, you're too young to understand it."
"I don't tease you about being 10 inches shorter than me!"
"Uh huh."
"Well not much."
"Sureeee." I say, rolling my eyes.
We pass the door that we left through to dance in the rain last time I was at Malfoy Manor.
I look at the door, and Draco follows my gaze.
"You want to go outside don't you?"
"Yes."
"Alright." He says, laughing. He scoops me up and carries me out the door and to the tree. I laugh the whole way there.
When we get there he sets me down. I almost wish he hadn't.
"You know I did."
"Did what?"
"I told you once that I would come back here everyday I didn't see you."
We stand in silence for a few minutes.
Last time I was here was half a year ago. I feel so much older than I was then. Like I know more and was so stupid then.
I feel like that girl was a different person.
I walk over to the tree and start climbing.
Draco comes over behind me and seems ready to catch me if I stumble. I sit down in between two connecting branches, and Draco climbs up after me, finding two more connecting branches.
The wind blows through, gentle and cool. The branches move ever so slightly.
"Draco?"
"Yes?"
"Why do you hate Harry, Ron, and Hermione?"
Draco doesn't answer for a few minutes, thinking it over.
"I don't hate them. Not really. I find them annoying, and I would sacrifice them for my family if necessary, but I don't hate them."
"Then why do you make fun of them?"
"I don't know. I guess, Harry's always been the center of attention. He's the famous boy who lived. Even when I got hurt in second year at the quidditch match, he got more attention. No one cared. They swarmed around him. That's kind of why I milked the Hippogriff attack for all it was worth in second year."
"What about Ron and Hermione?"
"I have been told that blood traitors and muggleborns were the worst thing imaginable in the wizarding world for as long as I can remember. Weasley was a blood traitor. Granger was a muggleborn. What I hated more about Granger though is that she had better marks than me. I have always hated having to tell my father that a muggleborn has better marks than me in wizarding classes."
"But there's nothing wrong with muggleborns and blood traitors. Blood status doesn't define how good of a wizard you are."
"I know that now, but until this past year or so, the blood supremacy beliefs have been ingrained in every bit of my being."
I suppose I can understand what he means. My mother told me the same things too. I believed her until first year.
"So you don't think pureblood a are superior anymore?"
"No."
We sit quietly for a while.
"What job do you want after leaving Hogwarts?" I ask.
"Honestly, I haven't thought about it much. I doubt it will be much of my choice. If I do get to choose, maybe I would be a professor at Hogwarts or maybe work at the Ministry, although that seems rather boring. I've always rather liked Divination. I would love to take Trelawny's job. What do you want to be?"
"I want to teach at Hogwarts too. Or maybe an Auror. But I doubt that will ever happen. I like potions well enough. Or maybe Astronomy."
"What's your favorite flower?"
"White roses. Yours?"
"Sunflowers."
"Favorite color?"
"Green. An yours?"
"Navy blue."
"Favorite animal?"
"Wolf."
"Dragon obviously."
We go on for a while, asking simple questions. Then, after a few hours of asking every question we could think of, it was dark out.
"We should probably go back inside." Draco says.
"I suppose."
We walk back in, hand in hand.
We walk through the halls back to his room.
I change in his bathroom while he changes in his room.
"I have something for you. It's not really a birthday gift." He says when I come out after we both change.
He walked over to his bedside table and opened a drawer, pulling out a small box.
He walks back over to me, and holds the little black box in one hand.
"We are young, but have so much to deal with already. Our lives have never been great, and with the Dark Lord back, it doesn't show signs of getting much better."
He opens the box to reveal a gold ring with an emerald in the middle. It is simple, yet elegant. Then I realize it's not just a ring, it's a promise ring.
"Once we are done with school, do you want to get away from here? From our families and lives?
"Yes." I'm too shocked to say anything else.
"Then I promise to one day propose to you."
"And I promise to accept."