m it's valentine's day
now you get some priest time
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"What the fuck do you want?"
"..You should know, Y/N." Pucci spoke, resting his hands on the table. You couldn't really tell if he was under the strange spell or if he was genuinely normal.
"Uhh..I may need a recap, Mr. Priest. I'm not really interested in your life goals all of the time, especially since my friends are, you know, not themselves at the momen--"
Pucci raised his hand up, silencing you. "Hush now. You don't need to worry about them..let's just spend this moment like we used to, Y/N. Talking like..friends.." He spoke. You raised an eyebrow. "Uh, dude, I can't really consider being friends with you, since you are sending a hell of a lot of people after us. Plus, you hurt Jolyne's dad. That lowkey sucks." You stated.
The priest continued on. "I am finding the way to achieve heaven, Y/N. It is what I must do to avenge Dio-sama, who I believe was send from above, since he helped me when my life was going downhill." He explained. Achieve heaven? What? You looked confused, but Pucci said nothing else about the subject to explain. "..In fact. Y/N, I believe that you were a gift from God."
Oh, you thought you were some sort of curse. Oh well, guess you were some holy ass bitch now.
"I've been preventing you from achieving heaven though. How am I a gift?" You demanded, raising an eyebrow. Pucci let out a sigh. "I'm afraid that's the problem. I intended for you to aid me, but unfortunately, before I could do anything, you met that cursed Kujo. You merely are on the wrong side. Your blessed heart is being tainted. So, Y/N..I'll give you an offer.."
You were beginning to think Pucci was indeed being controlled by Cupid, so you decided to play along. "What's this offer, Father Pucc?" You asked. "Please, just Pucci. We're..friends." Pucci corrected you, before continuing on. "Leave them behind, and join me. I'm sure they'll just leave you behind if they do happen to defeat me, which is unlikely. You can be by my side..you can achieve heaven with me, and together, we can have control over the universe, and wipe out the Joestar bloodline, just as Dio-sama wanted." He offered.
You stared at him with a blank expression. You thought of Jolyne, Foo, Ermes, Weather. Hell, even Anasui. You would never leave them behind..not in a million years. So, you leaned back, acting careless. "Yea, nah homie. I'm on the right side. Also, fuck whoever this Dio is."
Pucci stared at you for a moment, before sighing. "I suppose it would be hard to change you. I guess you leave me no other choice." He stated. "Oh, I guess I'm gonna die now." You replied sarcastically. Pucci was silent as he began to rise up.
..Clunk.
Pucci fell onto the floor, and you looked up to see Emporio, who was gripping a baseball bat in his hands. "Hell yea, kid!" You patted him on the head. "T-Thanks, Y/N. It looks like I got here just in time. Now, let's go!" He shouted, and the two of you once again took off.
Yea, whoever this cupid guy was..he was definitely getting his ass beat.
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You and Emporio ran down the street. "Alright..guy with a red and pink tuxedo..red and..there!" You pointed at the male, who was sitting at a table, drinking tea. He looked up, and as you approached, you can tell he wasn't expecting you, as he dropped the cup. "Yea, spill that hot drink all over yourself. You deserve it for fucking with my friends." You sneered.
"W-what? How? I thought you wouldn't have hurt your friends! You should've been defeated.."
You rolled your eyes. "You obviously don't know who Y/N L/N is. Actually, you don't know who you're messing with..which, gives me the impression you just charged in headfirst, eager to please the priest. That was your first mistake. Secondly..if someone is trying to attack me, even if it was my friends, I fight back. Of course, they're not too hurt. I care enough to spare their lives. Third..you used them just to get me to the priest, who was also probably under your spell. He probably would've killed me, and then I guess you would've killed the others. So..all three of those mistakes..is the reason I'm not sparing your life."
You could see Cupid's face pale, as he backed away. "H-Hey, now just consider this, Y/N..I can give you the love of your life! I'll make you a millionaire even! You can marry a millionaire! Or-or, I'll set you up on a date, or I'll even give you boxes of chocolates! I-I'll marry you, Y/N! Just spare me, and I'll do whatever you want!"
Cupid then looked at you, observing your expression. Seeing a look of consideration on your face, he inwardly felt relief. You'd agree to his plan, and once you would turn your back..he'd kill you himself. Then, he'd kill everyone under his control, and achieve heaven himself..victory was as good as hi-
There was a slapping noise. Cupid's eyes widened in shock, as tears formed in his eyes. "W..what? Why did..why did I slap myself.." He exclaimed, before feeling himself smack himself again. His gaze drifted to you. "I was almost convinced. Until you suggested I marry you." You stated, yawning. "R-Really..?" He asked.
"..Nah. That was just a lie. You were lying as well, weren't you?" You asked. Cupid didn't answer, and immediately, he slapped himself. "What is this..WHAT IS THIS?!" He screamed. "..While I was talking a few minutes ago, I brought out my stand, Suspicious Minds. You were so focused on me, that you didn't feel my stand enter your body. Now, you're under my control."
You then yawned once more, before making Cupid slap himself over and over. "I could do this all day. However, I don't really have all day. I have friends to check on." You then made him trip, and land on the ground face first. "My..my face! My beautiful face! How dare you?!" Cupid screamed, as you took out Suspicious Minds from his body. Cupid then moved his finger. "I..I can move! Now..I'll kill you!" He screamed, lunging upwards.
You looked up at him as he flew at you, before you sighed. "Happy Valentine's Day. Hope you find a Valentine in hell." At your words, Suspicious Minds began to barrage Cupid, you watching with little to no care in your eyes. As your stand delivered one last punch, you turned away.
"..Actually, I much rather see you burn alone in hell. You don't deserve a Valentine."
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After gathering all of your friends back together, you opened up a can of strawberry soda, and took a sip of it. You had a tired look in your eyes, and leaned against the car as Emporio stood next to you. "I had to drag Cupid all the way to the dumpster. I don't really care much to hide the body well." You stated. Emporio nodded with a slightly worried frown. You then turned your head, to notice the others were all standing in front of you, each holding an item in their hands.
"Emporio, get the baseball bat. I think they're still under the control of that stand."
At your words, Jolyne shook her head. "No, Y/N. We're back to normal now. The others and I wanted to repay you.." She flashed you a small smile. "Yea! And you better fucking accept it. I feel bad for throwing you in a dumpster." Ermes exclaimed. You paused. "..Alright. Fine."
And so, everyone came forwards, one at a time with their gifts.
Weather had come forward first, holding in his hands a box of mickey mouse clubhouse chicken nuggets. "I know you wanted these. So..I found them for you." He said as he leaned in close. You looked down at the box in your hands, and an almost childish gleam appeared in your eyes as you put the box aside, and gave Weather a hug, surprising the tall male. "Weather, you're such a considerate person. Thanks..I need to get you a gift in return, though, Weather boy!" You stated. You didn't notice Weather's cheeks were slightly pink, as he silently nodded, and took a step back.
Anasui was the next to come forwards. With a large smile, he looked down at your hands for a moment, hoping that you had kept the ring. He had been under control, but he also hoped you still kept it. It wasn't on your finger, but Anasui hid his disappointment, by lifting up a bouquet of your favorite flower. "Anasui, did you know these were my favorites?" You asked. "Ye- I mean, really? It's my favorite too, Y/N." He smiled at you. You took the bouquet, and also decided to give Anasui a hug. Though it was short, Anasui felt as though he had entered heaven itself. He did wish you gave him a kiss though.
Next, F.F came forwards, a smile on her face. In her hands was a pack of water, but you also noticed she had a bag of you favorite candy as well. "I'm not too sure what's in this bag, but Jolyne told me they were your favorites, so I got them! Also, some water. Because you need to stay hydrated. Plus, we can share! You are someone I would let touch my water." She explained. You nodded at her words, a small smile on your face. You were touched that even though Foo didn't really know what candy was, she still got some for you. You gave her a hug. "Of course, Foo. I'll share this water with you. And the candy as well. I think you might like it." You promised. F.F's smile grew. You made her day.
Immediately after F.F, Ermes stepped forwards. "Hey, Y/N! So, uh, I had to search a while. And I do know how much you like Disney, so I got a collection of some classics. We can have a Ermes and Y/N night sometime, and you know, we can watch some movies together!" She stated. You let out a gasp. "Ermes, that's awesome! Yea, we can definitely watch some movies together!" You accepted her request, and looked through the collection of movies. There was Mulan, Aladdin, Lion King, Cinderella..all of the famous classics you loved. Ermes really knew your type. You then hugged the female, Ermes returning the hug. If you two ended up watching Aladdin, she'd definitely try and reenact the Whole New World scene with you.
Finally, Jolyne came forwards. The two of you stared at each other for a moment, before she spoke, an awkward grin on your face. "Heh..so, I know today has been Valentine's themed..so, I did decide to get you something a bit, y'know..Valentine's themed." She then held out a box. You took it, and stared down at it. "Hey..it's those little candy hearts!" You gasped out, hugging Jolyne. You then immediately took one box and opened it, taking out one heart. Yours read 'XOXO'. You then offered some to each of your friends, Jolyne watching you with a small, hopeful smile. "So, what do your hearts say, guys? Mine is just the classic XOXO." You stated. Jolyne looked down at her candy heart. "Mine says BE MINE." She told you. "That's what mine says too." Ermes added.
Anasui looked around at the others. He thought he was gonna be special. "Yea..I got BE MINE too." He admitted. F.F nodded in agreement. "So does mine!" She exclaimed. Weather then moved in close, and whispered. "Mine reads BE MINE." You then stared at your friends. "..That's weird. Okay, Emporio, get the baseball bat. They're all blushing." You told Emporio.
"No, no, Y/N!" Ermes shouted. "We're normal!" Anasui added. "Then why are you all blushing? I could've sworn I killed that dude."
Jolyne spoke up. "He's dead, Y/N. He's dead." She told you. "Then why.."
You didn't have a moment to speak, as Jolyne then put a finger over your mouth. "Well, I suppose we all had the same thought in mind..to celebrate Valentine's Day early. Since we had to go through all of that stuff. And I guess I'm speaking for all of us, Y/N.."
You stared at them, confused, before you let out a soft gasp as each of them nodded, as Jolyne spoke again.
"..So, Y/N. Who will you pick as your valentine?"
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Ah, yes, the classic cliffhanger. And it's the end of the special chapter
I'm just evil like that 😊
Anyways, I wish you all a great Valentine's Day! We'll be getting back to the canon chapters soon!