Rasha
three days later and I haven't even moved from my bed. I haven't been able to eat right and everything I have been doing is just crying. The only thing that I have been able to do apart from everything. I haven't even been in school, I can't face him. I just can't look at him. Like why man? What have I done to deserve this? What did I do?
Why am I acting dumb? I was expecting all of this from the very first start when I first laid my eyes on Maria. And he suddenly turned so suspicious after she started working in our school. He started lying and he met her behind my back. Why didn't he just tell me the truth? Why didn't he just tell me that she was a woman he used to date.
And yes, I'm a bad Muslim. And at this point do I even count as a Muslim, I lost my faith and forgot Allah. I'm aware of that, I don't know what I should do. I never thought this would happen to me, I used to be so in love with my religion. But now, I turned against my religion.
I hear knocks on my door, I look up and see my sister walk in with a smile on her face. She sits on my bed, I look down. I didn't want her to see my dark circles after getting no sleep and crying all day and all night. ''How are you feeling, Rasha.'' She asks with a sweet tone. I don't respond, and I don't plan to respond.
She sighs, ''Please talk to me, you haven't been active these past days. Is something wrong?'' A tear drops from my eye, I felt so weak. I didn't know what was going on with me, I didn't want to live. He destroyed me.
''Nothing is wrong, can you please leave?'' I whispered, I slowly looked up at her. She raised her brows, ''Rasha, please tell me-'' I cut her off by standing up, ''Get out! Now!'' I pointed at the door. ''Rasha, behave. Tell me what's wrong.''
''It's not your business, please just get out. I don't have time for anyone! Just please, get out!'' I exclaimed. She slowly stood up and looked at me, then she shakes her head. ''Someone destroyed you bad, and I will find that someone. Just wait.'' She kisses my forehead before she gets out.
I fell on the floor and cried hard as I could, I felt so empty. The only thing I felt was the pain. Is this really love? If this really is love, then fuck all of it.
Saiid
I've been trying to reach Rasha these past few days. God knows how much I've tried to call her and how much I have texted her. My heart hurts when I think about when she saw me with Maria. When she cried, and when she ended everything.
I didn't know how to react, I felt like my life ended right there and then. Rasha is the woman I live for, I don't know what I should do, this time it feels like I lost for real. Why do I always get into this shit? I have to explain myself to her, and It should be soon as possible.
''Saiid, we are leaving for the club. Are you coming with us?'' Adnan asks me, I look up at him from my plate. I sigh and shake my head, ''I have work to do.'' I tell him. Suddenly they all kept silent, I hear them whisper things to each other. ''Saiid, what's going on? You seem down?'' They all look at me. I bit my lower lip, ''It's nothing.''
I see Jaffar sit next to me, ''Saiid, how is Rasha? Have you been meeting up with her these past few days.'' My whole body gets weak when I hear her name. I shrug my shoulders, ''Rasha and I, we broke up.''
''What?!'' They all bawled out. I look up at them with a blank expression. ''Bro, are you serious?! What happ-'' Before Mac got to finish his sentence Nadia cut him off, ''He cheated on her, that's why.'' She folds her arms and looked at me with disgust. I look at her with my brows furrowed, what the fuck was she talking about? Or maybe she was the one who told her about Adnan.
That's why she had been cold towards me these past few days. She didn't even look me in the eye. ''Cheated? Saiid, is what she's saying true?'' Adnan frowns. My hand balled into a fist. ''I didn't cheat on her, don't make false assumptions about what happened,'' I said with a serious tone. She lets out a humorless chuckle.
''Saiid! You lied about meeting Adnan when you met up with another whore named Maria!'' She stood up and slapped her hands on the dinner table. I didn't know what to say to defend myself, because she didn't lie. I did do that. ''Saiid, answer. Is what she saying true?'' Adnan repeated himself.
''I did.'' I let out, without even trying to defend myself. They all raise their brows and look at each other. ''Bro, but you loved her? You turned the world upside down if someone hurt her. You always talked about her and how much you love her. What happened?'' Jaffar's words hurt because I could really kill every person who made her cry. But now, I was the one who hurt her.
''He probably got bored of her, you know sometimes men can get bored of meeting the same chick every day.'' Mac shrugged his shoulder, he said it as he tried to defend me. I scoff. Then I shake my head, ''I never, never got bored of her. I don't think it was possible to get bored of Rasha. But Maria, she fucked everything up.''
''Who the fuck is Maria, can someone please tell me.'' The second Adnan asked it we heard the doorbell ring. We all walked towards the door, I opened it. And there she stood. Maria. ''Saiid, I have been trying to reach you.'' She gave me a weak smile who she thought would cheer me up.
The hate I have for her is indescribable. This woman, she fucked my life up then and now. She left me when I loved her, and now she made the woman I love leave me too. ''Aren't you going to invite me in and introduce me to your friends?''
I bite my lower lip of frustration. ''Get the fuck out of here,'' I said. No emotion, no nothing. I just told her to get the fuck out. She laughs with nervousness in her tone, ''Saiid, you must be kidding.'' I hear Adnan behind me whisper if she's Maria. Then I see Nadia step in, ''He told you to get the fuck out, what don't you understand bitch!'' Nadia pushes Maria.
Maria looks at her with her forehead wrinkled, Nadia keeps pushing her out to the yard. ''Don't push me!'' Maria kicks Nadia. Nadia laughs, ''That's the whore that you left Rasha for?'' Maria looks back at me before she slapped the shit out of Maria. ''Ohhh!'' The boys gasped.
''You slut!'' They began to kick and slap each other for real this time. The boys and I tried to separate them, but it was almost impossible. Finally, we separated them. I looked at Maria getting up on her own. Nadia made her look like a mess. The boys brought Nadia into the house which left me and Maria. ''Sa-'' I cut her off, ''Maria, leave. I don't have time for you or anyone else.''
I got in and saw Nadia scream, ''Are fucking serious! Are you serious! You left Rasha, a woman who loved you for that whore!'' I felt so much pain inside of me, but I didn't know how to show it. Then I took my car keys and got out, I had to get her. I had to get her.
Rasha
''Rasha! I want you to go to the store, your father wants to eat egg!'' I heard my mom shout from downstairs. I sighed loudly, I didn't have the energy to be running around and buy stuff for my family. I didn't even have time for myself. I put on a scarf around my head and wore my jacket. I without even telling them anything got out of the house.
It was great to finally feel some air, I haven't breathed some real air in three days. I locked myself in my room. I walk a few minutes more in the way, I knew there weren't any cars who were driving here at this hour. But all of a sudden when I look up I see a familiar car stand in front of me. I sigh and the tears were about to crash down, I heard the car door open and close. I cover my eyes to be ready to wipe my tears away.
I feel him put his arms around me and pull me into a hug. ''Saiid, please let me go. Please, let me go.'' I sob quietly. He hugs me tighter. ''I won't let you go, I won't let you go Rasha. Not this time.'' Hearing his voice made my heart hurt. I push him, I couldn't let him get away with what he had been doing. ''What are you doing here, Saiid?'' I wipe my tears away.
He sighs, ''Rasha, please let me explain. I know you know about Maria, but I did it to protect our relationship. I was scared that she'd tell you things that were not true, every time she called me she told me that she'd kill herself if I didn't meet her.''
I laugh sarcastically, I shake my head. ''Saiid, are fucking serious?! Protect what? Our relationship?!'' I scoff, ''Are you happy now, you fucking destroyed it. You could've told me what was going on, you've could've told me what she was doing. But you didn't, you didn't Saiid.'' I knew he was hurting as much as I did, maybe worse. But I can't take him back, he lied to me. And it broke me.
''I fucked it up, I know. But I didn't know what to tell you, I didn't w-'' I cut him off, ''Saiid, enough. Please enough. You aren't saving the situation. In fact you aren't doing anything. I won't take you back. Never.''
He looked at me with pain in his eyes, ''Rasha, if it's not you, it's not anyone. And if I have to fight for you, I'll do that. Even if it takes years to get you back, I'll still wait for you.'' I want to cry, cry my lungs out. How, how is he still being like this? Why won't he give up on me? ''I love you Rasha, I fucking love you.'' We look into the eyes of each other but kept quiet. ''You clearly don't-
''Rasha? Saiid?'' We both turned our gaze and saw my sister looking at us with her eyes widen.
God, can this get any worse?
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