S A M
Weeks had passed since they opened the bunker to other hunters, growing this new hunter network, where eight hunters were currently living with them permanently. Two others lived close by and stopped by almost every day. Other than that, they had hunters visiting when driving through town, or if there was something they needed, or could help with. So the bunker was often bustling with people. Now, right before Christmas, the bunker was so alive, which it probably hadn't been since the Men of Letters left it, and Sam was almost glowing with excitement as they continue to develop the network. Getting calls from other hunters across the country who wanted to join their work, some wanting to establish a base as they had here. Sam had grown up not wanting to be a hunter, but now, he couldn't imagine not living like this. He loved this. Loved how he could help others, get hunters in touch with each other, establishing a community and network that for sure would live on for a long time.
Sam also loved how it brought him and Eileen closer each day. She loved hunting too, and she often went out on cases with the other hunters living in the bunker. Sam tried to join whenever he could, but he, Taylor and Xand mostly stayed here working on uploading their library to the online hunter's network. Today, however, Leo had found a ghost case just an hour drive from here that he had wanted Sam to join him on. He guesses he needed to get out there once in a while.
Jack came and went whenever they could, joining them for dinner in the bunker, movie nights in the living room. Jack didn't stay for long, as they were busy rebuilding heaven, fixing what Chuck had ruined or broken. Making a better world. Sam couldn't be more proud. The world was safe, in the hands of a God with a heart as good as Jacks.
Dean had started his new job at the garage in town, and he seemed to really enjoy it, he even spent more time in the bunker's garage during his days off. He would help them whenever they needed, with whatever they needed, Dean even had joined Eileen on a simple ghost hunt last week, his first hunt after he'd gotten Cas back. But other than that he didn't join them actually hunting. But he was happy, happier than Sam had ever seen him, and that's what matters. He hadn't really been surprised when his brother had told him that he wanted to quit hunting. He knew Dean no longer wanted to chase after his destiny as a hunter, now that he had the chance to live a happy, safe, almost normal life. With someone he loved.
Castiel usually spent his days in the bunker helping the others, or Sam. He'd been working on translating a section of books in Enochian, and some others that were written in such old languages that it was impossible for anyone else to translate. He seemed to really enjoy it, the reading and the writing. Some days he would disappear from the bunker for hours. He'd told Sam that he enjoyed the peace he found in nature, so he was often drawn to the forests close to the mountains.
Cas would sometimes join him or Eileen on some of the basic hunts, the quick and easy ones, but nothing big or too far away. Sam suspected Dean might have something to do with that. He knew how protective his brother was about Cas, he always had been. And now that Dean had gotten him back, finally got what he had wanted for so long, he for sure refused to lose that to a stupid hunt.
Dean and Cas.
Sam had never before seen neither of them so alive. Not much had changed really, except now they didn't hide from each other. However, sometimes the happiness in their eyes was the only indication that anything had changed between them. The kissing was new, the giggling, tight embraces, cuddling. But... they were so they, that Sam sometimes almost forgot that they had finally gotten together. They'd always been close, inseparable. The looks were the same, a longing for the other shining brightly. The way they seemed to always be touching somehow, or at least be so close that they could touch. The way they always seemed more alive when in the presence of the other.
However, now the longing looks were answered. They didn't turn away when the other caught them watching. The touches always leaving a fire around them, a fire they didn't hide anymore. But they were still Dean and Cas. Dean very obviously in love with Cas. And Cas clearly in love with Dean. So sometimes Sam was still surprised when he'd catch them kissing in the hallways, laying very close together on the couch, standing close in tight embraces.
He knew that Dean was very protective over Cas, he always had been, but now more than ever. Sam understood that perfectly. The way he had felt when his relationship with Eileen was still fresh. How he was so protective. It was in Dean's nature to be protective of the people he loved, he'd been like that with Sam all his life, so he wasn't really surprised. They didn't hide, but Sam had noticed how they were more careful around the others in the bunker. In front of Sam and Eileen, they seemed to feel safer, but with the others, they were more subtle. When he had pointed it out to Eileen she had told him how she could see the protectiveness in them both, when others were present. How they liked to keep to themselves, not showcasing their feelings.
Sam had known Dean before Cas, Dean without Cas, so he could see the protectiveness in them both. The way they loved each other from afar, and he found it strange that they didn't show it more now that they finally could, knowing the other would answer. He'd thought that when they finally got together, they wouldn't be afraid to show everyone that they loved each other. Eileen had said that the way she saw it, as someone who had only known Dean with Cas, they loved each other in the details, while they shielded themself from anything that could harm them. Shielded their feelings, because their feelings could make them vulnerable. Not that the hunters in the bunker would ever do something to hurt them, but they were people who they'd only known for a short time. People that didn't know their story, a new element in their lives that they still hadn't learned fully.
They all knew there was something between the two, but no one asked them or said anything, and as long as they hadn't announced anything, they would keep it to themselves. Right after the new hunters had moved in, when some of them were in one of the smaller libraries, one of them had asked Sam about them. But only that one time. They seemed to understand how the two were very private.
"If you don't mind me asking, Sam. How long have Dean and Cas been married?" Surprise clear on his face, Sam started laughing at Alex, who shared confused looks with Taylor, Aiko, and Zane.
"What?" Zane had given Sam a questioning look.
"They aren't." Sam chuckled as he watched the two others sitting at the table.
"Oh. Together, then."
"They aren't." The confused looks he got in return had made him laugh even more.
"Wait. Seriously?" Aiko had come closer from her spot at the bookshelf.
"Yeah. Dean and Cas... Well, let's just say that the both of them are so emotionally constipated and blind that they have been pining after each other for like twelve years."
"You're kidding right?" Zane had closed his book, a look of strong disbelief pointed at Sam.
"I wish!" He had to laugh again. He did suspect something had happened between the two of them these past weeks after they woke from their sleep, but they hadn't said or showed anything. But, if they didn't open their eyes soon, and see the other, Sam might go crazy, if they didn't explode first, from the tension between them. Amused, he sat back in his chair, watching the others. "Now, tell me. What made you all think they were married?"
"Ehm. Everything?" Zane was frowning at the table.
"The way they look at each other." Aiko pointed at Sam, stealing his attention. "It's fucking crazy that they aren't together when they look at each other so intensely."
"They are always touching or standing close to each other. It's like they're two magnets drawn to each other, no force keeping them apart." Alex was just as confused as Zane looked.
"The way they act so different with each other than anyone else. Like Dean, he just... turns soft whenever Cas is close. And Castiel... he's so bright when he's with Dean. Everything, really." Zane repeated.
"Yeah. That's been there for over a decade. I've been third-wheeling them for so long I might actually explode soon." He had to laugh at them again. It's hilarious how these people who has spent less than a month in the bunker, had seen this so clearly when Dean and Cas hadn't. "So, no they aren't married, and they aren't together as far as I know. But they'll get there."
"Seriously?" Aiko half whispers to the bookshelf.
"Believe me, I wish they'd just get their shit together. I might have to lock them in a room together, refusing to let them out before they have."
"I seriously thought they were married..." Alex has opened her book again, but he can see her unfocused eyes trying to figure it all out.
This was before Sam knew they actually had gotten together, but he had suspected something had changed, already the day they had returned from the empty. He'd gone to Dean's room to look for them. When he opened the door, he'd first seen their intertwined hands, resting above Dean's heart. He'd smiled at them, at the way they lay so close, faces turned towards each other. Even when they were sleeping they longed for each other. Sam had quietly turned off the lights in the room and taken the tray of uneaten food with him, closing the door, still smiling. If they didn't figure shit out now, he'd definitely have to do something about it himself. He'd returned once every other hour, making sure they were okay. Their hands stayed over Dean's heart. They hadn't moved much, but it did look as if their bodies kept moving closer each time. When Dean had messaged him, he'd run to his room. Their hands still together. Bodies now so close that their sides were pressed against each other. Cas was lying on his stomach, his shoulder half resting against Dean, face turned towards Dean. A couple of days later he'd seen them walk into Dean's room together, closing the door, neither of them leaving until the next morning.
Talking about it with Eileen, she'd made him understand the two in a way he hadn't before. With Eileen's words, Sam had truly come to understand how Dean and Cas guarded themselves against being vulnerable. Neither of them had really been good at showing emotions in the presence of others, so it shouldn't really surprise him. Then Eileen had pointed out another thing that Sam knew of all too well, but had never really understood; the way they loved in the details. Sam knew the little things had always been there, but he'd never seen why, or how. Now they made so much more sense. She said that they weren't people who showed their emotions with big gestures, so as not to draw attention to their feelings, something they considered so private. She told him how they loved and lived through the small gestures. How they showed their feelings in something as simple as a touch on the shoulder, a touch at the elbow, a hand on the other back. How instead of standing in front of everyone, kissing, they would sit in a room full of people and only have eyes for each other. How they always were drawn to each other. If placed in a dark room full of people, they would know at once where the other was, finding each other right away.
Even if they were bickering, fighting, the love glowed so strongly Sam was almost taken aback by it. Like when Cas had come home from a hunt with a cut on his cheek that needed stitches, and Dean had flipped out. Just the thought of Cas getting hurt or Dean losing him again seemed to break something in Dean. They had stayed mad at each other the rest of the day, not saying a single word to each other, and yet... The touches were there, the fussing when Dean cleaned the wound, the looks they gave each other, the way Dean melted against Cas when they sat down by the fire that night. Dean sitting down beside Cas, leaning against his chest, Cas with a hand around his shoulder. As Dean watched one of his favorite movies, Cas was reading a book, his hand played with Dean's hair. Still not saying a word to each other.
Or when Dean had hurt his ankle after being carelessly climbing onto a shelf in their garage, tripping the whole thing over. Cas had been mad at how careless he could be, angry that he couldn't heal him anymore. They'd started bickering about how the other was careless, and how the other had no way of protecting them if they kept being reckless. Sam had laughed when he came into the kitchen and heard them fighting about who gets to love and protect the other the most. They didn't talk much that night either, communicating only in small, short, flat words. Silence treatment seemed to be their specialty. Later that day when they cleaned up after dinner, Sam saw the hand Dean placed on Cas's lower back when he passed him to get to the sink. How Cas had placed his hand on Dean's shoulder, his thumb stroking his neck, for a moment when they walked down the hall to Dean's "cave" that he had made into a private living room or movie room for him and Cas. When Sam was on his way from the living room to his own room that night, he had passed their slightly open bedroom, and as he quietly slipped past, Sam had heard them saying good night to each other with sweet words to make up for the silence.
"Goodnight, angel."
"Goodnight, love."
And then almost inaudible he'd heard them whispering a sweet "I love you" to each other. So, Dean and Cas might not showcase their feelings the same way the other couples in the bunker did, but the way they showed their love through the simplest things, the smallest gestures, were just as beautiful, if not more.
Sam couldn't believe how blind he had been to not see all of that in that way before Eileen had pointed it out. How they loved each other so intensely through such small gestures, almost invisible to other people. He must have been just as blind as Dean and Cas, to not see that that was the way they loved when he'd been watching them do it for years. Sam had lived with the two of them for over a decade, used to the touches, the longing looks, the fighting, everything. So he hadn't seen the way they loved each other quietly while doing it before Eileen had explained how she saw them. And now he couldn't see it. And he couldn't help but remember how those small gestures had always been there.
The love. Dean and Cas.
It shone stronger now, glowing more brightly, that light that had always been there. Never dark, only ever shining stronger and stronger.
But now they had set it on fire.
***
When Eileen finally wakes, her smile lighting up the dark of their room, Sam kisses her before pulling her even closer. They had gone to bed early last night, but they hadn't slept much. He could still see how she glowed as she lay there in his arms, her naked skin only covered by a thin blanket. He'd never had anything against mornings, but it hadn't been until he'd started waking with her in his arms, that he truly enjoyed the mornings. Not as much as the nights, but as long as she was beside him, he was smiling.
With a quick shower, Sam leaves Eileen in the bathroom, heading towards the kitchen. His stomach already starting to scream for food. However, the sight he meets when he walks into the kitchen silences it and he almost forgets why he's there in the first place. That how surprised he is when he sees his brother. Awake. Dressed. Drinking coffee. Smiling, early in the morning.
"Good morning?" Sam looks at his brother, confusion all over his face. Dean was never the first one to wake in the morning. Never waking this early. It almost made Sam a little worried.
"Morning, bro!" Dean's wide smile and shining eyes take away his worry, but not confusion. Sam notices that his hair is damp, probably having just showered, and he's wearing one of his silly-looking pajamas with pictures of pies on it, and a dark green comfy-looking hoodie.
"Everything alright?"
"Life is good, Sam, it's perfect." He raises his cup of coffee as if toasting before bringing it to his lips, his free hand fiddling with his necklace which always stays hidden beneath his shirt. "It's a beautiful morning."
"Okay... I take it you and Cas had a good time yesterday?" Sam moves to sit down opposite his brother, and just a second after he sits by the table, Cas walks in, a shy smile on his lips as his eyes meet Deans. He's wearing one of Dean's black hoodies, his hair also newly showered. They stare at each other for a long moment, just like they always do, making everyone present almost uncomfortable because of the tension. "At least late, you were still gone when we went to bed... when did you come home last night?"
Over his coffee, Dean grins at his brother. Cas has moved to the fridge, taking out the leftovers from last night's dinner that they never showed up to. Sitting down close to Dean they share the plate. A grin is spreading on Cas's lips too. It's all in the small gestures with them. Now that he has seen it once, he can't help but see it in everything they do. No one lives with such love in the smallest thing as they do. Sam is convinced that even their every breath is a declaration of love to the other man.
"Who said we ever got home last night?" Dean winks at his brother as he takes the fork from Cas, overloading it and bringing it to his mouth.
"You stayed out driving all night?"
"We were out yeah... well, inside the car, though we were too busy to drive..." He says as he hands the fork back to Cas. Winking at him as he watches Cas take a bite of the creamy pasta salad Eileen made yesterday. As always, his eyes are glued to Cas. So there it was, so clearly visible. Those small gestures. The looks. The way they loved. "The backseat is pretty comfortable if you share it with the right person."
"The back..."
Oh.
Oh.
Clearly slow this early in the morning, distracted by his own thoughts, Sam takes a moment to understand what his brother means. But his raised eyebrow and a wicked smile say enough. As he catches up, really not interested in his brother's nightly activities, he gives him an annoyed look and rolls his eyes, quickly standing up to get himself something for breakfast.
"Please don't elaborate."
"Man, I think stargazing is my new favorite way to spend my evenings."
"It was pretty pleasurable. Wouldn't mind repeating it." Cas mumbles to Dean as he chews with his mouth full.
"Oh God, guys, please... I haven't even had my coffee yet." Standing with his back against them, Sam can still hear it when Dean leans over to give Cas a big and noisy kiss. When Sam hears them both giggle quietly to each other, he has to smile too. Although not interested in how they spend their nights, he's still happy for his brother. Happy for them both, his brother and his best friends.
Sam prepares four avocado-toasts, displaying them on two plates, then he pours one cup of coffee, and one cup of tea. When he sits back down, Eileen walks into the kitchen, smiling as she joins them at the table. She's so beautiful, Sam thinks as he just stares at her
"Morning, boys." She smiles brightly, her hand gently running through his hair as she sits beside him.
"Morning, little sis." Dean smiles at her before once again stealing Cas's fork to fill his mouth with too much food. Sam can't help but smile at his brother. It's even in the way they eat their breakfast.
"How was your drive..."
"Please don't ask. You don't wanna know." At Sam's words, she looks between the two smiling men sitting across the table. She seems to catch up way faster than Sam and shakes her head at them as she smiles.
"No, I don't think I do." Dean laughs at her fondly before turning all his attention back to the food.
"I gotta say, Eileen, you make one killer pasta salad."
"It's amazing," Cas adds with a smile.
"Thanks." Her shy smile makes all the butterflies in Sam's stomach run crazy.
"Didn't think you were the salad-type."
"Shut up, Sammy. This is not the same as your rabbit food, that green leaf thingy. This is real food."
"Sure, Dean."
"Well, as long as it tastes good, it's good enough for me. So, what's the plan for today?"
"Leo suggests I should get out on a hunt once in a while, to get a break from all the work here, so we found a case, some ghost haunting a school. It's not far so we should be back by tonight. You could join us if you'd like to?"
"Maybe another time, Sammy. Wasn't really planning on doing anything today. Got some parts to change on Baby, so I might spend some hours in the garage."
Sam knew what Dean's answer would be, but he asked him anyways, each time Sam were to go hunting. He respected that he didn't want to hurt anymore, but he knew Dean appreciates being asked. Cas and Eileen seem to have moved on to another subject, already deep in conversation across the table. Sam tries to catch up with some of what they are signing but they move their fingers so fast, probably talking about a subject Sam isn't able to make out, so he quickly gives up, not ready for learning this early. Cas, fluent in every language, is of course also an expert in ASL. Sam is still learning, and although he knows a little bit, he isn't an expert, so he's glad at least someone is. They'd found they had a lot of common interest, so Cas and Eileen have become very good friends after Cas got back, and both Dean and Sam couldn't be happier about it.
He loves how happy Eileen looks when they are deep in conversation like this. And he loves how happy Dean is, watching his angel.
Family.
A real, and loving family.
It's what he, they, had always wanted.
// AN //
thank you so much for reading, and thank you so much for all your amazing comments!<3