"Can I see Mavin.." Stefan's sleepy voice filled my room. We're videocalling through laptop because it's weekdays and also we're both busy.
"Here he is.." tumatawang sabi ko at ipinakita sa kanya ang teddy bear na binili namin nakaraag buwan.
I saw how he smiled when I hugged the bear and continued writing notes. This is us for a month because we're both busy and have no time to go out.
"Tour me in your room, Mav." he said and fixed his radiation glasses. Drop dead gorgeous whatever he wears.
I snorted. Binuhat ko ang laptop at ipinatong ko sa isang upuan kung saan makikita ang buong kwarto ko.
"I told you, my room is full of arts and colors.." sabi ko sa kanya at bumalik na sa kama.
"What a talented woman.." he said and slightly shook his head and chuckled.
"Ikaw din naman.." sabi ko sa kanya at inayos ang mga notebooks sa kama. He chuckled.
"I'm not a fan of arts but I think I'm going to be a fan of the artist and her arts.." seryosong sabi niya.
"The world is full of arts.." sabi ko sa kanya.
We stopped videocalling when it's already night.
I am enjoying his presence. I just don't want to ruin my happiness right now. I am liking the thought that Stefan and I have the mutual feelings for each other. It's our second month seeing each other and smiling together. Two months pa lang pero pakiramdam ko ay antagal na..
Marami na akong alam tungkol sa kanya at ganoon din siya, he's a man of his words. That's all I can say, he don't like lying because for what is lying when you'll still face consequences at all. What he says is what his actions show.
All I can is, I can't stop what I am feeling..
"Mavis!" napalingon ako at napangiti ng malawak ng makita si Stan. Stefan said that Stan is busy with his academics and also sa mga competitions in swimming.
"Grabe, hindi kita nakita ng ilang linggo! I felt peace when you're not around!" I joked. He frowned and mess with my hair.
"I just gave Kuya more time with you, you know he's insane and crazy over you like a dog." he laughed.
"Ewan ko sa'yo." sabi ko at natawa na lang.
"Hindi mo ba ako icocongratulate?! I won in different competitions within one month!" he said arrogantly.
"Congrats, shokoy!" sabi ko at tumawa. Ang kanyang tawa ay nawala at naging simangot.
"Lumalakas ka na rin mang asar ah! You're not the Mavis I used to know.." he said dramatically.
Napafacepalm ako at hindi na mapigilan ang pag iling.
"Oh shut up, Constantine.." sabi ko at natawa.
Naglakad kami papunta sa cafeteria para kumain. Stan looked bit darker, siguro dahil sa pagsuswimming. Kahit ganoon naman ay hindi naman nagbago na gwapo pa rin siya. But I haven't heard that he has a new girl, baka nagbagong buhay na?
But I was wrong, pagkapasok namin sa cafeteria ay may inakbayan siyang babae. Napailing na lang ako at naunang bumili ng kakainin at umupo sa tagong part ng cafeteria.
"Iniwan mo ako!" reklamo ni Stan.
"Andami mong babae eh." sabi ko sa kanya at kinain ang biniling banana bread.
"I'm just enjoying being bachelor.." sabi niya sa akin at ngumisi.
"You'll regret having a lot of girls soon.." sabi ko sa kanya.
"Yeah, maybe. Especially when they hurt the woman I'll love.." he said.
"Wow, I thought you don't believe in love." sabi ko at tumawa. He raised his brows at me.
"I believe in the power of love, I'm just waiting." he said and smirked.
"Anong uri ng pag aantay? Does bedding a lof of ladies help you wait for the love of your life?" tanong ko sa kanya at nagtaas ng kilay. He laughed.
"Who told you I'm bedding a lot of woman?" he asked while laughing. Nagsalubong ang kilay ko.
"I concluded!" sabi ko.
"Mavis, I'm a type of guy that fucking only one lady per month. I don't repeat girls, and also I don't easily fuck them. I'm not a cheap guy who repeats bedding the same women." he said blatantly.
"What an asshole!" inis na sabi ko sa kanya. He just shrugged.
Iris is right. Stan maybe good and jolly friend but he's a terrible and jerk when it comes to women. What an asshole!
"Hindi ako makapaniwala sa'yo! So when did you started having a lot of ladies?" tanong ko sa kanya.
"When I was 15." he answered immediately.
"What the hell?" gulat na tugon ko sa kanya. Natawa na lang ako at napailing sa kanya.
"You already fucked 60 different ladies! What the hell..." hindi makapaniwalang sabi ko sa kanya.
"Hoy! May mga buwan na wala akong babae! Nagcocompute ka pa!" he laughed.
"You're still an asshole!" inis na sabi ko sa kanya.
"I'm a man and I-----"
"Then suck your dick alone! Stop playing around!" inis na sabi ko sa kanya. He looked so shocked while looking at me.
"Constantine, what the fuck!?" I heard Stefan's mad voice from behind.
Mabilis na nag init ang pisngi ko nang marealize kung ano ang sinabi ko. Oh please!
"Kuya, it's not me, it's her." sabi ni Stan at itinuro ako. Tinignan ko siya ng masama.
"Oh shut up, asshole!" inis na sabi ko sa kanya at binato siya ng tissue.
"Mavis, your words." Stefan gently warned. I just bit my lips and looked at Stan who looks like an idiot.
"Wow, kapag sa akin ay galit ang tono mo! Pero kapag kay Mavis ay malambot at malambing! You're unfair!" reklamo ni Stan.
Stefan's face hardened and raised his brows.
"She's the one who's calling me jerk, asshole and also she said that I should suck my dick alone!" pagsusumbong niya.
"Yeah, she's right. You should suck it alone." seryosong sabi ni Stefan, I burst and started laughing.
I know that they are just joking but Stan looked so pissed right now. Namumula ang leeg at nakasimangot.
"I hate you both." he murmured.
"Pikon." Stefan grinned and sit beside me.
Alonzo brothers is always part of my whole day. In school, I always witness how they argue and make fun of each other. And sometimes they are ignoring each other while we're in one table. It was fun to be with them, they are making my life fun and happy. Stan's joke and silliness and Stefan's care and presence.
But my happiness slowly fades away when I heard a lot of rumors circulating around the campus. I wasn't ready for it, I am scared of it.
I slightly bowed my head and walked pass by them. I just don't know what to feel. I am actually expecting that this would come but I am not prepared for this. I actually don't want this to happen..
I felt at ease when no one is around near the old laboratory. I just want to eat all alone. Hindi ko na sinipot ang magkapatid dahil sa mga tao sa paligid. Umupo ako sa sahig ng lumang building at kumain doon ng payapa.
I recalled some of their words, it was frustrating..
Instead of thinking about it, ikinain ko na lang ng ikinain ang mga problemang tumatakbo sa isipan ko. Sooner or later, everyone will know and yeah, it will be a big news for GNU students.
Bago ko hayaang tuluyan mapasok ni Stefan ang buhay ko ay humingi na ako kaagad ng kapatawaran kung may maaapakan man akong tao. I just want to be free, free to love someone who I want to love.
Uminom ako ng tubig at kinuha ang cellphone ko na nagriring sa bulsa ng palda ko. Mabilis kong kinuha at tinignan kung sino ang tumatawag. It's him, of course.
Tumikhim ako bago sagutin ang tawag.
"Hi.." simpleng bati ko at tumingin sa mga puno na gumagalaw ang mga dahon dahil sa hangin.
"Where are you?" agad na tanong niya.
"May tinatapos akong activity." I lied. I heard his sighs and some noises. Siguro ay nasa cafeteria.
"Wala ka naman sa classroom niyo, dumaan ako doon kanina." he sounded like he's trying to be calm.
I awkwardly laughed.
"Maingay kasi, hindi ako maka focus." sabi ko sa kanya.
"Nasaan ka nga?" tanong niya ulit, nagtitimpi dahil mukhang naiinis na.
"Kahit saan?" sabi ko at bahagyang tumawa. Nawala ang tawa ko ng katahimikan ang narinig ko sa kabilang linya.
"I'm in peace, Stefan. Don't worry, I just want peace, kumain naman na ako.." mahinang sabi ko sa kanya.
"Call me when you're done with your activity." malamig na wika niya at pinatay ang tawag.
Napabuntong hininga na lang ako at kinain ang isa pang pagkain na dala ko. Gusto ko lang naman mag isip muna. Masyadong magulo kapag sinabayan ko ang mga daldal ng mga tao.
Wala naman akong kasalanan sa kanila, why are they throwing hates towards me?
I heard a group of girls, calling me "manunulot", may iba pa na nagsabi na inantay ko lang umalis si Jesy at sinulot ko na agad si Stefan. It wasn't true.. Hindi naman di ba?
May isa pa na tinawag akong pekeng kaibigan, dahil kaibigan ko si Jesy at ganoon ang ginawa ko sa ex boyfriend niya. I love Jesy, I treasure her so much..
Napahilamos na lang ako sa aking mukha at inayos ang aking uniform at kalat.
I texted Iris about this, I know she can help me to think what I will do about this issue.
Mabilis akong naglakad papunta sa susunod kong klase. Hindi ko na lang pinansin ang bulungan at mga tingin nila. Kapag pinansin ko ay mas lalong bibigat ang nararamdaman ko. I'm not used to this.. I'm not like my little sister who's strong enough to face this kind of situation.
Umupo ako kaagad sa pinakadulo at doon na lang nanahimik at naglibang habang nag aantay sa professor namin. Maingay ang buong kwarto, may nagtatawanan at nagkukwentuhan.
Inabala ko na lang sa pagrereview ng nakaraang lesson ang aking sarili para hindi matuliro kakaisip kung ako ba ang pinag uusapan nila o kaya ay pinagtatawanan. I think I am losing my mind.. This is bad. Sumasakit ang ulo ko kakaisip sa mga bulungan ng tao sa paligid..
Naramdaman ko ang paulit ulit na pagvibrate ng cellphone ko sa loob ng aking palda. Hindi ko pinapansin dahil nakikinig ako sa professor ko, at lalong hindi pupwede dahil mapapagalitan ako.
Hindi ko alam kung gaano katagal at karami ang pagvibrate ng cellphone ko, kaya pagkatapos na pagkatapos ng klase ay chineck ko agad 'yon.
19 missed calls.
Hindi ba niya alam na nasa klase ako? Oh god, he's the former president, he should know that cellphones are prohibited inside the classroom! At, wala ba siyang klase at paulit ulit akong tinatawagan?
Oh goodness, this man is making my headache worst!
Iniligpit ko ang mga gamit ko at mabilis na nagmartsa papalabas ng kwarto. Hindi ko na pinansin ang mga mapanghusgang mata ng iba kong kaklase. I know them, of course, halos lahat ay kaklase ko rin noon, kaklase namin ni Jesy.
Kaya siguro marami silang nasasabi..
Huling subject ko na 'to sa araw na 'to, at uwing uwi na ako. Ayoko na magtagal pa rito. Dumiretso ako sa Science Lab para sa huling subject.
Nakasarado pa kaya ay umupo muna ako sa sahig at uminom ng tubig. Kinuha ko ang cellphone ko at nakitang may text si Stefan.
From: Stefan
Your class is already done, why aren't you answering my calls? Hindi naman sobrang higpit ng Prof mo ah.
Napapikit ako sa nabasa ko. So he wants me to answer his calls while in the middle of our lesson? Siraulo ba siya?
I texted him back.
To: Stefan
I'm busy and so are you, right? Why are you wasting your time calling me every 3 mins? Mag-aral ka na lang, mag-aaral din ako.
Napakunot ang noo ko ng bigla itong tumawag. May iilang boses akong narinig na papalapit kaya ay hindi ko sinagot at bahagyang lumayo sa Science Lab.
From: Stefan
Isa pa, Mavisse. Answer my call. And our conversation will never be waste of my time. Answer me or I'll go where you are right now.
Pinatay ko ang cellphone ko at inilagay sa loob ng bag. Sakto at bukas na ang Science Lab kaya ay dumiretso na ako ng pasok sa loob.