To feel alive yet dead.
To have breath in your lungs but to also be six feet under.
To have loved and lost.
To have lived and died.
To have lived long enough to become the villian
And died.
To be a rockstar.
To truly understand this concept,
You must first walk the tides of the shores alone with your wings severed, broken
Crying out from eden or wherever the fuck you fell from
To hear no one answer.
To be a rockstar, you must be hated by many.
Adored by lots.
And desired by thousands.
The tastes,
The scents,
They all age and fade with time.
Enough time given and you'll forget your own scent too.
To be a rockstar,
You must lose.
You'll forever lose.
Money.
Contracts.
Fans.
Family.
Lovers.
To be a rockstar,
You must be willing to bet on yourself.
Are you worthy of such a heafty wager?
Or will Night City grab you by the balls and make you their bitch?
"To hell with it," I smashed a champange bottle against the bouncer's skull, knocking him unconcious as the crowd behind me erupted in screams and cheers.
"I LOVE YOU NIGHT CITY!!!!"
"JOHNNY, WHAT THE FUCK CHOOM?!"
"WHAT? CAN'T HAVE A LITTLE FUN?"
Kerry shoved me into my dressing room.
"Ever since Alt died, you've been reckless man! Almost like you want the badges to swope down and flatline ya ass. Me, Henry, Nancy, we just wanna chill and make music, make money. Not be on every fucking news channel in the city for trying to blow up Arasaka Tower!!!!"
"So what if I die? Big deal! Nothing'll change. I have nothing else to lose."
To lose.
Nothing. To. Lose.
To be a rockstar,
Would you lose everything?
Lose everything for a shot of fame?
______________________________________
"You in there V?" "C'mon, choom. You gotta wake up."
I groaned as I opened my eyes, accepting the fact I've passed over into the next life, only to be laying at Vik's clinic.
"What....the...fuck...."
"V. I'm glad."
"My head, Vik. It...it feels like...fifty shades of get fucked." Vik immediately blocked my punch and injected me with some sort of medication, instantly putting me in a frozen state.
"You're not yourself, V. Your mind and Johnny's are fighting for dominance in your body. So far, his conscious is winning."
"What's gonna happened to V and to me?"
"Glad to know you're Johnny," Vik sat down besides me. "Look Johnny, you're killing V's body. Basically you are a parasite. In a few weeks, neither of you will cease to exist. V's body is basically on its final stand naturally. I can delay with some cyber implants but not with the brain. It'll dereriotate into nothing and you two will be gone."
"You've gotta get me outta this chick's head man!"
"That would cause you both to flatline."
"So...that's it, huh? I'm going to die in this girl's body and...what 'bout her?"
"She will regain control over her body soon. The pseduos are out of her- your system." Vik pulled out a cigarette and lit it up infront of me. "Could be inna half hour. Could be tonight. Tomorrow, I don't know for sure."
My head throbbed in pain as Vik removed the headset and wires from the back of my skull. "We're dying," my voice was now intertwined with the pitches of V's and myself.
"Our time's almost up."
"Two souls fighting for dominance in a body treating both like foreign matter," Vik put it simply. "Even if one were to live, it wouldn't be for long."
"How long?," V's voice became dominant.
"Few days at best."
"Where's Judy?"
"I'm here, V. If that's who you say you are." We looked over my shoulder to find Judy laying in a rolling chair, giving us a death stare, mascara tears that dried leaving black ink trails down her cheeks. "What's going on, tell me the truth."
I felt my control over V slipping away. Trying my best to retain some control, I felt it neccesary to tell this woman the truth. "The...name's Johnny. Johhny Silverhand. Me...V...are one person. One body....we...are...
"Dying," V spoke. I clutched my head as I knew all too well my fight for control was almost over.
"But," I continued. "We aren't....aren't dead yet. Arasaka. That's the key. Tell V.....please." I laid back in the chair and exhailed one last time as I felt my conscious being ripped from the driver's seat, tossed into the truck like the rockstar trash I was...I am.
_______________________________________
"Hey, hot shot. What's your name?" Coughing up phlegm and blood, I simply replied "V." before laying back down in my bed. "Are you the real V though?"
"Judy," I groaned as I sat up. "Would the real V be awake right now, talking to you after being ripped of their body for the last few days by a parasitic construct that's overtaking their mind? Or will you believe me and let me blow my brains out in the morning?" I proceeded to throw my comforter over my head, laying back down in my bed.
"Still can't wrap my head around this, V. It seems too fucked to be true, even for Night City."
"Considering I had to rent out a whole new apartment since "I" trashed the old one so fucking badly....and the whole Pacifica ordeal....I told you I have no memory of any of it. Let me rest, please." I didn't move from my comfy sanctem. Johnny fucked up so much of my body, my head, my life, it was all too much to handle in one night. "Don't...leave though...."
"You want me to stay?"
"Yes....no...I don't know...." I felt a warm body slide into my bed besides me, two pairs of hands wrapped around me, comforting me as Judy held me close enough to hear her beating heart. "Sometimes....it just feels like there's no escape, no hope. That the only answer....is at the end of the barrel. Even before this relic corruption fuckfest, there were those thoughts. That there was no point in me trying to make it to the big leagues....that I'd flatline. Jackie, T-Bug...they're gone because of me.....why aren't you scared? Death seems to follow me like a shadow."
She rested her right hand on my cheek, wiping away some tears.
"I lost everything I have ever cared about, now Evelyn's gone, I don't really have much of a reason to stay in Night City."
"Why not leave?" Judy shrugged.
"Got some loose ends to tie up. Some last things to take care of first. And I gotta make sure the best merc in N.C. doesn't blow herself to bits just yet." I chuckled.
"Keyword, yet." There was a long pause of silence. Not the unsufferable silence one may find awkward. No, it was blissful silence. Peaceful silence. Judy traced her fingertips along my collarbone and across the bloodied bandage wraps."Will you stay the night?"
"Sure, V. Let me get you your pain killers and blockers." She left from besides my bed, leaving me alone momentarily before returning with two pills and a can of beer. "It'll take the pain away real quick. And I'll be right by your side, okay?" I grabbed the pills and chased them with the beer and laid back down.
"I owe you one."
"I'll hold you to it. Night, V," she rubbed my back as I drifted off into peaceful slumber. No Johnny Silverhand in mind.
______________________________________
❗❗⚠️⚠️ 18+ Smut Ahead⚠️⚠️❗❗
"V...V...V." Judy shook me awake, couldn't have been past 4 am. "I neeed you." Before I could question anything, she climbed ontop of me and kissed me.
"Judy?" She looked up at me, her eyes filled with passion and lust. "What's going on?" She chuckled before kissing my neck, getting a faint moan out of me.
"Mhmmm. You like that?" She began kissing lower and lower, reaching my collarbone, then proceeding to trace her fingertips along my skin.
"Judyyyyyy..." I whinned as I tried to rub my legs together, eagered to create some kind of friction to give me any type of relief. Judy raised an eyebrow and began running her fingers around my ribs, down my arms, her fingers dancing on my sweatpants helm.
"No." She simply spoke as she kissed my scar covered stomach. "Not yet. And," she lowered herself inbetween my thighs."Now, be patient," she smirked so devilishly. I silently groaned in agony. I wanted her. I wanted her to take control of me. To use me. But she's playing me like a doll. And she's enjoying every bit of it.
"Fuck," I moaned as she left hickies just above my pelvic area, making me wetter than the ocean. Judy smiled with pride as she stood up and walked towards my closet. She returned with handcuffs and a double ended purple dildo, making my entire being crave her more and more.
"This your first time?" Judy asked as she handcuffed me to my bed railings.
"Been quite some time..." I licked my lips as I stared down Judy's body, tracing her tattoos with my pupils as she climbed ontop of me.
"I'll be gentle. Don't wanna ruin you too much." Judy gently massaged my breasts, sucking the other off in the meanwhile. I was in heaven. She looked me in my eyes, grabbed me by my throat with one hand and slid the other into my pants. "Somebody's wet already? I'm just messing with you, kitten." She slid two fingers into my soaking wet hole, with her thumb gently rubbing my clit, causing me to curse and moan pleasurably. I tried to pull away but it was futile. Judy picked up the pace, soapping wet noises filled the headspace around us and within miliseconds, her hand was covered in my juices as I screamed out her name. Judy smiled and licked off her fingers as I came down from my high.
"Oh....my...god...."
"I'm not done." She spoke in a dominating tone as she ripped off my pants and boxers, lunging mouth first at my pussy. She licked at my wet folds like a hungry wolf, devouring her first meal in days. I screamed in euphoria as I close my thighs, trapping Judy's head, cumming for a second time. Judy licked her lips before kissing me, putting me in such a deep trance, I didn't notice her sliding her dildo into herself into she moaned in my mouth.
"Fuck me, V..." She begged. Pulled out the dildo and spread her legs wide open for me, revealing how wet and juicy she was. She stood up and unlocked me, I immediately shoving two fingers into her vagina, causing her to moan as I thrusted them in and out, licking her clit, waiting for her to release her juices on my face. "Faster! FASTER!" I obeyed and thrusted faster, sucking her clit harder and without much warning besides a high pitch moan, I was showered with her sweet juices.
"Ready for more?," I smiled as I wiped my face on my pair of pants.
"I think I'm up for more."
"Good." I grabbed the dildo, inserting my end first and then Judy's. Judy's moans matched with mine as we rode our way to another mutual orgasm, this time calling it quits. We laid besides each other, the smell of sweat and sex laid heavy in the air of my room but we didn't care. "That was amazing." Judy sparked up a cigarette and smirked.
"Too bad it was all a dream, V." She looked at me and blew the smoke in my face.
"Huh?!"
"Yeppp. Your alarm will sound off in three..."
"NO! Wait this can't be fake!"
"Two...."
"JUDY PLEASE-"
"One....
______________________________________
A/N: Am I an asshole for making that scenario nothing more than a wet dream? Yeah...
Will Judy know of V's secret desires? Idk, I make this up as I go XD
But I have been playing more of Cyberpunk 2077, side missions mostly cuz I wanna get mantis blades and MY GOD THE DELAMANE QUESTS BUGGED MY GAME SO I HAD NO CHOICR BUT TO DO EM AND DRIVING ALL ACROSS N.C. AINT FUN OKAY EXPECIALLY CUZ I SUCK AT DRIVING IN EVERY VIDEO GAME!!!
Aside from that...
I have a super op knife but since guns are like nubah one in the game, im pissed cuz ive spent alot of points on blade damage and progression and nothing on guns soooooo
But besides crashing and some bugs, I do love Cyberpunk and this book will continue til I see fit for an ending (not til 20+ chapters im thinking) but idk. Thanks for all the love
-deadwords