After Mikasa ripped Eren and me off of one another we went inside the mess hall to finally eat some food, and I could tell my stomach was thankful for it from the monstrous noises it was letting out earlier.
Once we all came through the doors, side by side, all heads of the cadets-in-training shot towards us- but that was to be expected since we did make a whole spectacle of our reunion. I glared at them, silently daring them to say something.
"O-Oi! Stop staring at them!" Connie came walking up to me, two trays in hand. The dim candlelight that illuminated the room shined on him, making his yellow eyes glint a bit.
I smiled at him, grateful for his effective words: everyone who was gawking at us with suspicious looks went back to eating their food. He held the tray out for me to take.
"Oh, for me Baldy?" He looks at me with faint displeasure at my words, taking his hand holding the tray back from my reach.
"Tch, not anymore," he says while shoving the tray into Armin's hands.
I snicker at his expression. "I'm sorry, Connie."
He just hums in response to my apology and walks away, but after taking a few steps he calls back. "I saved you guys a seat."
"Thank you, Connie!" I shout to him while chuckling, noting the small grin creeping onto his mouth. Mikasa, Eren, and I make our way to pick up our food from the cooks.
"Is that your boyfriend?" My head shoots towards Eren. He's shoveling food into his tray, trying to look nonchalant while avoiding my eyes.
"No, I just met him. Why? You jealous, Yaeger?" I ask him smirking while wagging my eyebrows up and down.
He shoves my face away with a tch. I nudged him in the shoulder in response and made my way to the table where Connie saved seats for us, but quickly went back to pick up a piece of bread for the potato girl. I heard from Connie that she was ordered to run till sunset.
My tray slams down on the table, starling Connie who I sat down next to- Eren right by my side. My cheeks reddened the tiniest bit as our shoulders were flush against each other as we settled down.
"Are these your friends, Y/n?" Bertholdt asked hesitantly from across the table, Reiner right beside him, curious about the answer too.
I nod. "We lived in Shiganshina together but got separated when Wall Maria fell."
"You guys lived in Shiganshina?!" A random boy sitting at a table nearby asked loudly. My hand gripped on the bread I was eating, knowing a whole floodgate of prying questions were about to be asked.
My mind goes back to those terrible moments where everything changed; the sound of the titans' footsteps echoed in my mind like it all happened yesterday.
I let Eren answer the questions everyone was asking. A crowd had formed around us, Connie included as he went to crouch right in front of Eren to hear better.
I was zoned out, slurping my soup and blocking out the kids' questions, until I heard the clink of Eren's spoon fall into his bowl. My head turned towards him to see his face screwed and pale. His hand shot to his mouth like he was about to vomit all over the table. God, I never even asked him what he saw that day.
My hand tugged on the hem of his shirt- out of everyone's sight- and broke him out of his troubled trance. He didn't make any move of acknowledgment or thanks, no that I cared though- we always had each other's back.
"C'mon. That's enough questions, all right." Bless you, freckles.
I go back to eating my food, silently chatting to Armin beside me. He told me about his grandfather. He seemed fine while talking about it, but as always, I saw right through him. His eyes held pain.
I grabbed his hands in silent support, gripping them tightly in mine as I listened to him, but in less than ten seconds they were snatched and held by Eren's under the table. I rolled my eyes at his actions. Always the baby Yaeger.
I got back to talking with Armin, sneaking one of my hands back to rest my chin on top of, but not removing the other from Eren's hold, knowing he'd through a hissy fit if I pulled both back.
"So, Armin, how do you get your hair to be so shiny and luscious all the-?" I cut my sentence off as I felt Eren shoot up from his seat.
He and Jean started to bicker about titans and shit. I don't even know.
"Want to leave?" I asked Armin, not wanting to deal with Drama Queen Eren- one of the most tiring Erens.
Armin looked nervous, his eyes glancing from Jean's sitting figure and to Eren's standing one. "I don't know, shouldn't we stop them?"
I looked at them and shrugged. "Nah he's got it," I say referring to Eren.
We went to get up and take our leave but Eren beat us to it, Mikasa trailing right on his heels. I giggle at Jean's dumbfounded face after his little interaction with her.
"Got a little crush, Jeanie?" I ask in a sing-song voice. Armin chuckled from beside me.
"Shut up, L/n," Jean says irritatedly, his eyes glaring at me. A blush spread across his cheek, making me laugh even more.
"Make me horse-face," I say with a wink and walk away, dragging Armin by the arm behind me. "Armin, what's his expression right now?" I whisper to him once we're a few feet away.
"Pissed." He replies with a slight giggle.
"Good," I say with a smile.
Armin said he'd head in for the night and made me promise that we'll fill each other up on everything that had happened tomorrow. I promised, of course, and left him with a goodbye, going to see where Eren was. I was excited- I finally got to spend time with him- my best friend-after so many long days of missing him. That excitement however was quickly snuffed out when I saw him talking with Mikasa, walking side by side. He brushed her hair in the air, saying something to her.
An unknown feeling punched me hard in the gut when I saw the two. I walked away and towards the side of a random building, not liking how I felt when seeing them alone together. My back hit the wall of the building, legs sliding down until I was in a comfortable sitting position.
That weird feeling was still in my stomach and chest, so I pounded on it. "Stop that!" I hissed to my body.
In that time away from each other- thinking I was dead- of course, they'd grow closer together. Mikasa might as well have known Eren better than me now. Maybe... maybe she was his best friend now.
I was replaced.
I sat there for a while, wallowing in my self-pity until a demon rushed at me at an insanely fast speed and grabbed the piece of bread hiding in my pocket.
I blinked up at a brown-haired girl, realizing it was not a demon, as she scarfed down the bread that was in my hands. She ate, no- more like inhaled, the chunk of bread in five seconds flat.
"Why hello, Potato Girl," I say with a smile while wagging another piece of bread I stole from Connie earlier in front of her face, taunting her.
Her head followed the food, eyes pinpointed on it as drool dripped down the side of her mouth. I chuckled and lofted it up to her. She caught it in her mouth and gobbled it straight up.
Once she was done and kneeled down in front of me and grabbed my face in her hands, squishing my cheeks in the process. "Thank you, my queen!" She exclaimed loudly. I repeated her action and squished her face in my palms.
"Of course...!" I said in the same enthusiasm, but trailed off, realizing I didn't know her name.
"Oh, right. Sasha! Sasha Braus!"
"Well, you're welcome, Sasha Braus!" After those words passed my lip she passed out on top of me. "Um, Sasha?" I heaved her body off of me and stood up, brushing the dirt off of my legs. I looked down and she was still knocked out cold.
I bent down to pick the girl up, not finding it all too easy since she was slighter taller than me. With a grunt and a few failed tries, I secured her on my back and headed towards the cabin designated for the girls of the 104th Cadet Corps. On the way there we passed two girls. One tall with short brown hair, and the other tiny with blonde hair like Armin. They looked like they were searching for something.
"You two need help?" I called out to them, adjusting Sasha's weight on me as she began to slip. Their heads turned towards me, looks of annoyance and relief on the pair's faces.
"Oh! You found her!" Girl Armin called out, happiness and ease shining on her face. A goddess...
I nodded starstruck as they came walking up towards me. Girl Armin started to talk again, saying how she fed Sasha bread and water then not soon after that the girl passed out, but then while Ymir, the brunette, was carrying her, she suddenly woke up and sprinted away. I huffed a laugh at Girl Armin's story, but then stopped when I noticed Ymir slightly glaring at my still starstruck expression. I caught her eye and gave her a suggestive look between her and Girl Armin.
Her cheeks tinted red a bit in embarrassment and I chucked under my breath.
"What's so funny, Y/n?" Girl Armin asked innocently with a smile, noticing my soft chuckle.
My eyes shot to Ymir but I kept quiet on what I inferred. "Oh, nothing..." I sing. "Wait, how do you know my name?"
"Oh, I heard Commander Shadis say it earlier in the field." I hummed. "My name's Christa, by the way." I smile internally at her embarrassed state.
"It's nice to meet you Christa, and you as well Ymir." Christa replied with a 'you too' and Ymir just didn't say anything. "So, where are you two from?"
"Um, well-" Christa began to say but was cut off when Ymir announced we were here. Fucking finally- Sasha was heavier than she looked.
Christa opened the door for me, like the goddess she was, and I walked in with Sasha about to fall off my back. My eyes locked with Mikasa and I gave her a smile, my thoughts of earlier pushed away.
She swiftly came over to me and helped me throw Sasha on an open bed, myself falling down beside her in exhaustion, preparing myself for yet another sleepless night. It would be worse this week than the ones to come; I never slept well in new places.
The candles were blown out and the room filled with darkness, only the faint sounds of snores and heavy breathing occupied the room. My hands picked at my own nails as everything from today fell on me. I was away from my... home for the first time in a long time; I was reunited with my friends who I thought were dead; I would be learning how to kill titans; I would eventually get out of these walls and fight them; I would-
Mikasa grabbing my hand to hold it in between us broke me out of my racing thoughts. "You shouldn't pick at your nails, it's bad for them." She said in a monotone voice while rubbing my hand in a soothing motion. I nodded and my tense body softened under the blankets. My body finally relaxed in her presence, feeling safe and comforted like old times. I hug her briefly with my free arm then attempt to doze off beside her, trying to match my breaths with her steady and deep ones.
I only slept four hours at most that night and the faces of titans and screams haunted my dreams the entire time.