~•Flashback•~
Its time, Jisoo thought, she thought about this all night, she barely had some sleep, today is the day she confesses her feelings for her long time bestfriend.
Taehyung.
She smiled widely looking at her reflection in the mirror.
She wore a red dress paired with nude heels with her hair curled just a little, she had put on a little bit of makeup and she looked perfect.
She was finally ready to go to Jimin's party, She knew Taehyung will be there so it will be a perfect opportunity to confess to him.
She bid goodbye to her dog and walked to her car. She was excited and nervous, an uneasy feeling rising in her stomach.
"Its okay Soo, its gonna be fine." She tells herself.
Finally after a 20 minute drive she finally arrived at Jimin's house, She parked her car and walked to the front door.
"Its fine, calm down"
She opened the door and was greeted by people dancing, chugging some alcohol and some we're even..... Making out?
Her ears heard nothing but screams and loud music.
She walks into the crowd trying to find Taehyung, she knows it will be hard the house was huge!
As she tried to get pass the people dancing she bumped into Yoongi
"Oh i-im sorry"
"Jisoo? Oh its ok" Yoongi replied
"Youre looking for Taehyung right?" He asked
"Oh yeah, umm im just not sure where he is"
"he is outside playing beer pong with some guys"
"Oh ok, thank you so much Yoongi, you have no idea how much this made looking for him much easier"
Yoongi smiled as Jisoo said thank you once again and made her way outside.
Once she was outside her eyes started scanning where Taehyung was.
Long story short she found him, and she spent the rest of the night trying to keep him sober.
Taehyung of course, drank some beer here and there but he wasnt drunk and you know not that sober either.
An hour pass and the party was still as alive as it first started, Jisoo thought that it was finally time to confess to Taehyung.
Deep breaths Jisoo she told herself.
"H-hey Tae, i-i have something to tell you? Do you think we can talk privately?"
"Sure, i know a spot"
Taehyung said.
As they got to the spot Jisoo mentally prepared herself.
"So what did you want to tell me?"
"Tae, I like you"
"W-what?"
"I like you, heck I love you."
"Love me?"
"Yes, more than a friend, I love you more than that, i love you more than a friend or a bestfriend and i-"
"Jisoo what the hell!"
"W-what?"
"Seriously Jisoo? You love me? Goodness Jisoo! Is our friendship not enough for you?"
"W-what no of course its en-"
"Then why? Youre so selfish Jisoo! Im sorry but I don't like you, you know I love Irene! And knowing that you like me- Heck Love me makes this Friendship awkward and weird! Im sorry but I think this friendship wont work anymore. "
"B-but-"
"I'm sorry Jisoo but i want Irene to be mine, I dont love you back and this friendship wont work anymore"
"S-seriously? 8 years of being Bestfriends-"
"You ruined because you were selfish!"
"How was i selfish? I just wanted to let you know that i love you"
"Even though you know I love Irene? What? You thought if you confessed my feelings for Irene will stop? Huh Jisoo? No! It wont stop, you know thats not how love works! And now look what you did because of your selfishness Our Friendship is over, Goodbye Jisoo"
He said and left, Jisoo was there, standing there in shock.
Their friendship was over.
Because of her.
Tears were streaming down her cheeks, her eyes followed Taehyung who walked over to Irene, grabbed her cheeks and....
Kissed her.
Jisoo was crushed, she ran back inside pushing her way through the crowd, she didnt care who she will bump into.
She just wants to go home sand cry herself to sleep, it was like all of her energy was drained out of her.
She ran to her car and as soon as she got in she cried hysterically, banging her fist on the wheel, her mascara was now smudge around her eyes, her lipstick was smeared and her lips we're quivering.
She cried and cried for who knows how long, as she finally calmed down she drove back to her house.
It was now 12:39 she came back looking like she was crying... On which she was.
She didn't really look forward going back home, Her family always make her feel like shit.
They would always compare Jisoo to her friends.
'Why can't you be more like Jennie? Look at her she's perfect!'
Or
'Why can't you be as productive as Lisa? She can dance, she's the leader of the dance club in your school and has won many awards. What about you?'
Or
'Have you heard Rosé's voice? She's so talented, why cant you he like her?'
Words like that would keep her up at night or let her cry herself to sleep.
Her family would compare her to other kids growing up, it made her feel insecure. They compared her looks, the way she laughs, the way she walks, her grades, everything!
So she knows for a fact her family would be questioning on why she came home looking like that.
She sneaked her way into their backyard and slowly climbing into her bedroom window using the trashcan to support her up.
She plopped herself on the bed and before she knew it tears we're there again, everything hurted.
She felt kinda numb.
The only person she trusted so much, the only person she ever opened up with, the only person she ever loved more than anything else.
Is gone..... Forever.
"How am I supposed to get through this?" She asked herself
She climbed into the sheets and covered her mouth to prevent any noise.
As she did, more and more tears we're streaming down her face, her make up was more smudged than ever, her hair was a mess and everything was a blur.
That night she cried herself to sleep with hurtful thoughts, like
'Irene is better than me'
'what did I do to the world? What did I do to deserve this kind of pain?'
'even my own family doesn't think that I'm good enough'
'What was I even thinking?'
'stupid, stupid Jisoo look what you fucking did.'
She woke up the following morning, her vision was kinda blurry, and her lips Were dried.
Flashbacks from the night before came rushing in.
And Tears started making their way down her cheeks..... Again
༻✦༺ ༻✧༺༻✦༺
Time skip: 3 days after the party.
It has now been 3 days, Jisoo was still in her room.
She rarely goes out, she just goes downstairs eat a small portion of breakfast and then go back, same goes for lunch and dinner.
Sometimes she even skips lunch, now her eyes were bloodshot red and swollen from all the crying her lips were chapped and she was definitely skinnier.
Her friends were trying to contact her asking if she wants to go to the mall or eat in the newly opened resto but she would always say that she was busy
Her parents would tell her to go out too.
"Jisoo! Come out of your room! It's been 3 darn days are you in hibernation or something?"
"Me and your Eomma will be going to the mall to get groceries you should come with"
"I don't wanna go Appa, I'm tired" she replied in a tired voice.
"well you have no choice"
༻✦༺ ༻✧༺༻✦༺
As they drove to the mall Jisoo can feel herself getting uneasy.
but as usual the stubborn Jisoo decided to ignore it.
They walked out of the car and as Jisoo stepped out she felt a little light headed, it was like her vision was a little trippy.
She held on tho the car door as she touched her head.
"Jisoo?" Her mom looked back
"Are you okay Soo?"
"appa-"
‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾ ☽༓･*˚⁺
"Mr and Mrs. Kim youre daughter is fine, She fainted from the lack of food consumption, her body doesn't have much energy which is why she fainted but other than that she is good"
"Oh thank goodness...."
"Doc, when do you think will my daughter get released?"
"Her body needs rest and energy, bringing her home is perfectly fine, but we think that she should at least stay her for a day or two so we can check her from time to time and give her the necessary vitamins to help her regain her energy"
"W-where am I?" She asked her haid still lightly spinning
"Jisoo? Oh thank goodness, Jisoo!" Mrs Kim exclaimed
"i'll excuse myself, i'll be back in 30 minutes"
"y-yes thank you doctor"
"E-eomma, Appa.... where am i?"
"Jisoo, youre in the hospital, you fainted."
"Appa? fainted what do you mean?"
"Jisoo.. the doctor said that you fainted from lack of food consumption! are you trying to starve yourself or something?!"
I fainted.
She was trying to hold back her tears as she remembers flashbacks from the past few days
Its not like they care anyways.
"when, when can i go home?"
"The doctor said that you should stay for a day or two at least"
"Well, i have work later, youre dad is going to be the one who is going to take care of you"
"I cant as well, i have a meeting and i am going to be the one who is gonna represent the company."
Jisoo rolled her eyes at her parents, Of course they have work, Even when she was still young her parents never made time for her.
"Well cant one of you guys just take a day off? Im sure that your Boss' will-"
"No i cant Jisoo, this meeting is very important, If i do well i might get a promotion"
"Eomm-"
"I cant all my day offs are finished, im sorry"
I mean, why am i surprised?
"So your jobs are more important than me?"
"Its not like that Jisoo" Her Dad said
"Be grateful Kim Jisoo, Other kids parents dont even have jobs to provide for their needs! you know what i have had it with your attitude! You are so unappreciative!"
Jisoo was trying so hard not to let her tears fall, her throat hurts as she was trying her best not to be weak in front of her parents, she turned to the side and hid her face below a pillow.
They never have time for me....
"Jisoo stop being a drama queen." Hae ae, Her mom said
"Hae ae, i think i know who we can ask to take care of Jisoo"
╔═══*.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.*═══╗
Time skip
╚═══*.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.*═══╝
Jisoo by now has fallen asleep, sleep was the only thing she can do to unhitch herself from reality, to not feel any pain that she feels when awake, in her dreams her parents were loving, supportive and would make time for her, her childhood was full of happy memories and not hurtful and lonely.
Her childhood wasnt like what others in her neighborhood or classmates experience,
Her Childhood wasnt joyful, it was full of hurtful moments she would hate to experience all over again, Her Childhood was filled with piano lessons, Learning another language, voice lessons and taekwondo,
she never wanted to do any of those but her parents did, she just wanted to enjoy the days where she was still young and carefree but she thought if she would do all those things her parents would finally appreciate her, Be proud of her and finally love her.
So she did, even if she never wanted to, Young Jisoo just wanted to feel love.... and so does Teen Jisoo.