//Ray's POV//
Saying I was exhausted would be an understatement. Every time I blinked I could feel the drag of sleep. But I couldn't sleep yet... not while Y/N...
"Our turn to keep watch." I turned to spot two nameless children and Emma approaching. She gave me a reassuring smile and my heart panged once again.
"Ah...thanks..." I said, turning away from the post.
"Did she get there safely...?" One of the kids asked the sky hopefully. I turned to them in surprise.
"She really helped us back there..." It was Jake, the oldest of the trio of siblings.
"Yeah..." Monica said with a sigh.
"Me too." One kid chimed in. They all began chiming in one after another with different comments about Y/N. "She cheered me up while I was grieving!" "She said some pretty weird things, but they were funny."
"If not for her... So many of us would've been in worse condition... some of us dead."
"I really hope she's alright!"
"For that girl... for her sake... let's all arrive in top-notch!" Everyone cheered, their faces happy and determined in their newfound confidence.
I smiled to myself before it turned into a frown. 'Y/N...the thing you said earlier... "I didn't think someone could make an expression like that for someone like me..." you didn't mean it, right? Can't you see how many people care for you? Please... don't do something like that again... I'll be back soon... so please, please be ok!'
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My eyes opened groggily. I almost winced at the brightness of the light that met them. Everything was so blurry... Was I dead? I blinked again and things began to come into focus. I looked around me and dimly recognized the surroundings to be one of the first aid rooms in the shelter. I felt completely awful- which was perhaps amplified by the fact that there was no one in the room with me.
I gulped, trying to suppress the frog in my throat. It makes sense, I suppose. How could I've hoped to take Emma's place in this situation... that's not to say it didn't hurt, though. I willed the tears that were in my eyes to go away, blinking furiously. I took a deep breath, which turned into a sigh.
All of a sudden the door began to creak open, and in entered Hannah. As soon as she took notice of my open eyes the clothes she was carrying were dropped to the floor. I watched in surprise as tears sprang into her eyes. She snapped back to reality, looking left and right, seemingly unsure of what to do. I saw her dash into the hallway. "Y/N- she's awake!" I heard her voice echoing throughout the shelter.
Immediately, children began pouring into the room until it was packed with as many as it could accommodate. I stared wide-eyed in shock as I noticed Theo, Jake, and Monica, the Goldy Pond resistance, Yuugo and Lucas, the plant 3 and plant 2 kids too.
Lastly Emma entered, pushing her way towards me in the crowd. "You're okay!" She cheered, gently engulfing me in a hug. I felt the tears I just blinked away resurface, silently willing them not to fall. "But 2 weeks is too short! You shouldn't've awoken yet!" She exclaimed in worry for my condition.
A small laugh left my parched lips but it died down as soon as I noticed who was lacking- Ray. I pursed my lips, disappointed in myself for feeling surprised.
"Y/N! You had us worried sick!" Poppy and Daisy suddenly exploded, them hugging me as well.
"We-we thought you were dead!" Some of the younger plant 3 kids said.
"Everyone's okay?" I asked, barely managing to get the words out. I was greeted by nods from practically everyone in the room
"Everyone!" Oliver declared. "If it weren't for you, I'm sure many of us would still be too injured to be up." He stated with a proud smile. I relaxed a little, looking back up to the ceiling.
"I'm glad..." I whispered. All of a sudden Emma shot up from her position holding my hand.
"Ray!" She exclaimed. "Ray, Sandy, and Hayato are out gathering food right now!" She finished, turning away and giving me a wave. "Keep Y/N company while I go grab them!" She said quickly before dashing out of the room.
The others all talked to me and I tried not to laugh too much as it occasionally caused a searing pain from my gut. But they were all in good humour, laughing with eachother, and to my surprise, talking about how worried they were for me and how glad they were that I was ok.
Zack made fun of my extreme amount of bandages- likely proud to no longer be the one constantly getting injured.
And then, approximately 10 minutes later, Emma entered the room, followed by Sandy, Hayato, and lastly, Ray.
As soon as he saw me okay and smiling the raven-head dropped to a crouch on the floor, his fingers clasped in front of his face as if experiencing an existential crisis.
"...you..." He said in a barely audible voice. "You..." He said a little louder this time, standing up and beginning to walk towards me as the crowd parted ways for him. "You..." He said one last time, a finger pointed at my face. I grinned nervously. "You big idiot!" He exclaimed at last. 'Here it is' I thought nervously.
"Do you have any idea how stupid that was?! How reckless?!" Ray continued. "How many people you made worry for you?!" He took a long breath to calm himself down. "-is what I'd usually say, but for now..." He sighed, taking my hand in his own and placing it against his forehead. "...I'm just glad you're alive."
There was a long pause of silence before an "Awhhhhh~~" spread across the room, barely audible from each person individually, but amplified by the sheer number of people making the noise.
Ray sent them a withering glare before turning back to me expectantly. Everyone began to filter out of the room, lastly being Emma, who gave me a supportive wink before closing the door behind her.
"Uhhh..." I said, certain that my face was as red as Ray's ears. My mind blanked and I said the first thing that came to mind. "simp?"
"That's it." Ray said, setting down my hand and turning away, running a hand through his hair angrily. "I give up on caring, you obnoxious little-"
"Simp." I said again.
He turned back to me. "Brat!" I smiled nervously before a suppressed chortle managed to leave my lips. "You dare laugh?!" He exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air in defeat.
I laughed louder despite the pain. "ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!" He roared, face-palming. I tried to stop laughing and it died down into suppressed chortles followed by the occasional giggle.
I snorted and coughed, trying to be serious again.
Ray was standing beside the bed awkwardly. "This isn't funny." He said, crossing his arms. It took everything I had to keep from laughing. Tears began streaming down my face in the effort. "It-its not funny." he repeated, biting his cheeks to keep from smiling.
"Y-your face-" I wheezed out before I started laughing again, Ray joining me after some time.
It took a while for us to finally quiet down. When we did we sat in a comfortable silence for quite some time before Ray broke it.
"Did you mean what you said before?" He asked. I blinked. What? Did I say something stupid I don't remember while I was recovering and high on painkillers?
"Uhhh if I said anything while half-asleep-"
"No, not anything like that. I mean right after Leuvis stabbed you." He sighed, shifting positions as he sat on the floor.
I bit my lip. "I never thought someone could make an expression like that for someone like me', huh?" I said, looking to the ceiling. "I wonder..." I sighed, my heart clenching. "Maybe I did..." I confirmed, turning back to Ray.
He looked away, staring at the wall. "You really thought that?" He repeated, his own voice riddled with emotion. I looked back to the ceiling.
"Yeah..." I confirmed once again. "But I think maybe now... maybe now I don't?" I finished. Ray turned back to me and offered a weak smile in response. 'Ah. I suppose I should consider how Ray would've felt hearing that. I can't imagine what it would be like to hear that from anyone I know...' "Sorry..." I said, placing my arm over my eyes in a pathetic attempt to shield them incase any tears should fall. "I'm sorry for saying that..." I said, my voice cracking a little as the expected tears fell after all.
After a moment some warm hands grabbed my own, bringing my arm away from my face. I turned away from Ray, embarrassed to let him see my tears.
"I'm sorry..." Ray spoke after we sat in silence for a minute, aside from my occasional sniffles. "I'm sorry for letting you ever think that." He said, bringing my hand to his cheek, where I was shocked to find wet.
I turned to him and saw the hot tears that ran down his cheeks, falling over my fingertips. I felt the emotions pouring out of him and responded in kind, my finally dry cheeks back to being wet. I cried out everything I hadn't allowed myself to feel all this time- including finally mourning my own death in my original world. I cried tears of relief for knowing that they all cared for me after all, tears of relief and guilt for admitting what I'd said, and tears of fear- fear for almost dying and leaving them all behind.
We took a little while to finish crying, before Ray set my hand down and wiped his tears. I took the chance to wipe my own cheeks, taking a few deep breaths to calm down.
Once we were both in a better state of mind, not so emotional, we sat in silence once again, before Ray stood up all the way, leaning over my bed to engulf me in a hug. I was shocked once again, but I quickly relaxed, wrapping my arms around his own.
We stayed like that for a while- longer then I'd care to admit- before I slowly drifted to sleep in the ravenette's warm embrace.
-----
So?
I'm weak, I know.
Can I just say, knowing that Ray at one point thought HE was a person who was so awful he was undeserving of love makes this chapter even sadder 💀💀
(The way he "casually" mentions lighting himself on fire to Emma, as if she'd easily be able to focus on escape after that... ouch...)
-Crying on the inside counts for all you dehydrated bitches, btw.