He did not move at all, it took two whole minutes for my brain to register that he wasn't hugging me back or should I say he wasn't touching me at all. I stepped back to stand near his bed, noticed his movements.
He was sitting on the bed looking tired, fragile and somewhat lifeless. That thought terrified my soul and the way his eyes were locked out the window like he was thinking hard about something, something which made him like that, didn't settle well in me. Then he turned his head and his eyes landed on me.
Those eyes locked on me, watching me with such a intensity that my knees buckled. I had to hold onto the table next to his bed to keep myself up. I slowly ran my gaze over him, taking in his state, he still had bandages, his complexion is paler than usual. He had lost weight which made him look all the more dead. God, what am I thinking?
It is so difficult to look at him at the same time him not looking at me. Every single emotion is trying to burst out of my chest and show him just exactly how important he is for me. My fingers are twitching to reach out and touch his soft skin, run my hands through his soft hair, to feel his lips on mine, to hold him tightly.
The urge to bury my nose in his neck, inhale his sweet-seductive-delicious scent, is so strong and overwhelming that my whole body is shaking. I want to mark him, to make him mine. This feelings come out as hot, salty tears. My visions blurred, I quickly rubbed it away. I don't want to live even a single second in which I can't see him.
I reached out and hugged him again. My nose in the crook of his neck, his scent wrapped around me like a safety blanket, making me feel warm inside as well I could think of every possible thing that could wrong. As much as liked being able to hold, I can't stop these scary thoughts. My entire body went cold when he backed away from me. His eyes locked on me, cold and hard.
I don't know how to describe this feeling in my chest, it's like he will vanish if I take my eyes off him even for a second. While my hands were itching to hold him again I knew he doesn't want me to touch him right now.
So I stood next to him, taking some time to collect my thoughts and emotions. I have a lot to tell and explain him. I have to choose my words carefully, if not, I might not able to make him understand how I feel about him or what he actually means to me.
But my mouth couldn't form a single word when he was still looking at me as if I was a stranger, we stared at each other for god knows how long. His stare became hard and calculative by very passing minute. That emotionless yet hard and expressive look on face stabbed my heart, does it make any sense? Because it does, to me atleast.
Before I could open my mouth to say anything, James and Drew barged into the room. James acknowledged my presence by a nod, he sat on the stool. Drew took the spot next to the door.
~:: What are you two doing here, Drew? ::~
~:: Thought you need some help. I was sure you wouldn't be able to utter a single word. So I aksed James to come and handle it on his own. He needs to know about you and what is your relationship is with him ::~
I was so relieved to hear that. Of course it is time to tell him, what actually bothering me is, his reaction. How will he react to all of it? Still I know, I am not sure how I would have explained things to Elliot. I smiled at Drew to show him how grateful I am.
~:: Thank you. ::~
~:: Just imagine me rolling my eyes. ::~
I turned my attention back to Elliot. James examined him from head to toe. It was then I noticed the deep scratch running down James' face. The wound was still healing which meant someone had done a number on him. I spin my head to question Drew about but he was lost in his own thoughts not that I can blame him.
"How are you feeling, Elliot?" James asked. His eyes were filled with concern, not sure
"Like a punching beg." Elliot answered. His voice was deep, rough from the lack of using. It was sexy. My face flushed just from hearing him.
"That's understandable. Everyone was worried about you." Elliot only gave a nod of head to James. Maybe it is still difficult to talk, I haven't talked to his doctor yet so I am not sure about his internal injury.
"What happened to you?" Elliot pointed his finger at the cut. James ran his hand slightly over it. His expression changed from concerned to alarmed in a split of second.
"Yeah, about that. First tell me what you remember before your accident, I mean?" He reluctantly asked Elliot. Elliot frowned at the question, he thought about it. It seemed he was confused untill he remembered something. His confused face shifted to mortified. He looked alarmed. He tightly clenched his fist to stop his hand from trembling. After a few shaky breaths he stared at James. I figured he recalled how James turned into his wolf.
Maybe it was all the drugs in his system or just he was too shocked, he was too calm for my liking.
"You...yo..wolf..." He shuttered. Elliot keep looking at James with a pointed look. What probably broke my heart and James' as well, was the look of fear.
"Oh..yeah that.." James sighed, he leaned back in his seat, "You saw me, shifting into a wolf." James waited for moment so that Elliot could confirm it. Elliot only managed a timid nod.
"What was that?" He mumbled softly.
"Have you seen the movie Twilight?" Drew chuckled at that. Elliot's eyes moved to him then back to James. Again he gave a nod.
"What about it?"
"You remember that boy Jacob black?"
"Umm..yeah?"
"We are just like him." Elliot tilted his head to side.
Gods above! He is so cute.
Drew cleared his throat and gave me a amusing grin.
"We are werewolves, Elliot. We can change our form into a human and a wolf, whenever we want."
"Oh."
"Oh?"
"I don't know how to react to this."
Elliot looked at James than at Drew then at me. James noticed his gaze so he continued.
"Yeah but you see Oliver is a little different. He can not change into a wolf. He has every sense like us but he just can't shift." James slowly explained everything single bit to him. He told Elliot about my parents, their accident, and how I ended up here. The mate bond was explained to him in details. James described how he and Emily are related. How special their bond is. All thw while Elliot looked at him as if it was bullshit.
It didn't go unnoticed how his flushed when James told him about being my mate. His face pinkened, hearing all about mates. Then it got to the part where we had to tell him about the recent attacks. James left the triggering details about it for which I was grateful.
After that we were all silent. Us, waiting for Elliot to say something and him gathering his thoughts.
He was clearly perplexed.
"So you are telling me that my sister has been with an animal for so many years and... and...OH MY GOD." He covered his mouth with hand, "And I didn't even know about it. She never said anything which...no, no it was my fault. I should have been more attentive to her." He clutched his hair and shook his head. James looked heartbroken hearing that. He would have guessed it was going to be the reaction of Elliot. But thinking about it and hearing it from him, was two different things.
"She is my mate, Elliot."
"I don't care about that." Elliot shouted, " Where is she? Where? You said so himself how dangerous it is here. Whatever you people are, I don't care. I don't want my sister to spend her entire here in a jungle qith you people."
"Elliot.."
"No, James. Tell me. Tell me, where is Emily?"
"She is safe."
"Oh god, where is Nick and Norah?" He demanded.
"They are also safe. Nicholas and Norah are with Emily so don't worry about them." James answered calmly even though I can tell he is angry. However Elliot wasn't satisfied, he tried to stand but his body couldn't comply that sudden movement. James stopped me from helping him. Elliot laid in his bed, breathing heavily.
"James, can go outside? I want to talk to him." Elliot shot me a glare hearing that. James and Drew left the room.
Now that we are alone and James had already told him everything, I don't have to worry about that. We can talk about us.
"Get out." I frowned. He didn't even spare me a glance.
"What?"
"Get out."
"What you mean?"
"Exactly what you heard. GET OUT."
"No. I not leaving. Tell me what's wrong.. are you mad because I didn't tell you this sooner. If you are then let me tell you, I..I so badly wanted to but the circumstances did nor let me." Elliot laughed at that. It was that laugh which I hate so much, it meant he was hurt.
"Do you seriously think I am upset about that? Do you not realize how...Get out Oliver. I don't want to talk to you right now."
"No. Tell me what's wrong."
He glared at me and I returned the gesture. I knew he is injured, it was all too much to take in but the least he could is share his thoughts with me.
"What do you want to hear or what do ypu expect from me? Huh? You have no idea what it all mean to me."
"Then tell me. Please."
"It's....Fine. Tell me why you never said anything about your feelings or done anything, sure you must have felt something for me. So why?" He asked.
"Because you were already married. You had a wife, a child, a family. And I never wanted to break a happy family, I am not that selfish." I replied.
"Really? Is that all?"
I hesitated after that. Sure it was the reason why I never acted on my feelings. So why does it not feel enough? Seeing I wasn't responding, he pinned me with a dirty look. He clenched his jaw so tight that the veins in his neck were visible.
"You don't even know what you do to me, Oliver. What your smallest move means to me." He looked out the window, breathing heavily. His injuries were definitely taking a toll on him. He was clearly having difficulties in speaking.
"I always hated Norah for betraying me. I never understood how can she be with but think about someone else. Why I was not enough even though that guy damaged her in worst way possible? Why she was always sad during pregnancy? Why she can't love me? Why? All those years I felt so unloved, so unwanted. I was never enough for her, I was not Nick's father. It was so obvious that I was not the part their life. I was not the part Emily's life. She kept such an important thing from me. May be I wasn't trustworthy, I was never a good brother. I was always jealous of her life- her love life. That's why...God I drifted us apart. I was so alone."
His confession shook me. His hurt voice squeezed my heart. His eyes were red, he was about cry but he controlled himself.
"And then you came, you looked at me. You held my hand. Your grip was so firm that I was sure you would never going to leave. Your gaze was so intense, so sharp, so captivating that when I was supposed to focus on my wife, I was staring at you. When I was supposed to go on a honeymoon with Norah, I decided to follow you. When I was supposed to be a good husband, all I could think about, were the thoughts of YOU."
What?
What should I say know?
Hearing him pouring his heart out and telling me how he exactly feels, sets my body on fire. I can't even begin to imagine what he must have gone through.
"Elliot, I..I.."
"Tell me if we are soulmates, then why the fuck you pushed me away? Whenever I took a step towards you, you took two back? Why? Or rather how it was possible for you to do that? When I was feeling like a cheating bastrad and still couldn't stop fantasizing about you, you were silent."
My head hung low because of shame. Honestly speaking, I have no excuse for that. I can't find in me to say something, anything in my defense. So I just stare at him. He laughed his dry laugh again.
"Please leave Oliver. I can't even look at you right now." He whispered. If it was a few days ago, I would be leaving the room like a coward I was. But not now, not after I nearly lost him. So like I sane person I am, I lunged and kissed him. He trashed in my arms obviously failing. He still wasn't strong enough to push me away not like he could. So I continued. I smiled when he finally responded to the kiss.
I felt like crying. His lips weren't soft neither was mine. The kiss wasn't rushed either. It was slow. When we pulled apart, his faxe was red.
"Still you don't know how to kiss."
"Considering it was second kiss, I think I did a pretty good job. Your blush is conforming my statement."
"Second kiss?" He asked.
"Um..yeah. The first one was in your room."
"Oh."
Silence followed after that, before it could any awkward then it already was I spoke.
"I know I have done things wrong. I am not going to justify myself because you deserve more than that. I am going to prove you that I am worth your time, I worth your love. But first I am going to make everything right. So wait for me a little while long, please." By this time I was a blushing mess. Elliot took his time to process the thing I said then suddenly he scowled.
"I never said I love you."
"You will, eventually." I teased. He smiled softly. "I am serious, Elliot. I will do rigjt from now on." He still didn't look convinced but nodded which was fine with me. For now atleast.
With that I moved forward and captured his lips again. He immediately kissed me back.
It was blissful.
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Supposed to update ages ago.
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