how it feels to be alive {tom...

By fairiesandfeathers

341K 12.6K 8.4K

It has been 20 years since the Battle of Hogwarts. Lucia is conflicted in her life, and even more so when she... More

how it feels to be alive
playlist
one: sweat
two: coffee
three: immortal
four: towel
five: lacy
six: alone
seven: war
eight: singing
nine: wish
ten: goosebumps
eleven: confrontation
twelve: movie
thirteen: feelings
fourteen: tension*
fifteen: fling
sixteen: clouds
seventeen: stoned
eighteen: touristy
nineteen: persuasive*
twenty: morality
twenty-one: irrevocably
twenty-two: polyjuice
twenty-three: borgin
twenty-four: damsel
twenty-five: ecstasy
twenty-six: magnolia
twenty-seven: comfort
twenty-eight: emptiness
twenty-nine: aching
thirty: hogwarts
thirty-one: desire*
thirty-two: rosier
thirty-three: joint
thirty-four: first day
thirty-five: victoire
thirty-six: lord
thirty-seven: detention
thirty-eight: fast fingers
thirty-nine: sober
forty: slughorn
forty-one: jealousy
forty-two: emeralds*
forty-three: change
forty-four: light and dark
forty-five: halloween
forty-six: kinky
forty-eight: hangover
forty-nine: unfixable
fifty: foreign territory
fifty-one: cruelty
fifty-two: dΓ©jΓ  vu
fifty-three: reparations
fifty-four: tongue*
fifty-five: nail polish
fifty-six: christmas
fifty-seven: love
fifty-eight: new years karma*
fifty-nine: erratic
sixty: rehab
sixty-one: released
sixty-two: reunited
sixty-three: graduation
sixty-four: expensive wine*
sixty-five: importance of occlumency
sixty-six: the pensieve
epilogue part one: soporific
epilogue part two: voldemort
epilogue part three: alive
thank you & final author's note

forty-seven: dirty

2.6K 124 42
By fairiesandfeathers

DIRTY

Heavy music was booming throughout the Room of Requirement when Lucia and Tom returned from the corridors.

"Tom! Lucia!" A slightly slurred voice attempted to call over the music, but only bits and pieces broke through the sound, "Where did you two nick off to? You weren't shagging were you?"

Lysander had a delirious smile on his face, and was giggling to himself as he wrapped his arms around Lucia's neck. The Hufflepuff girl he'd brought trailed behind him looking much less intoxicated than her date.

When Lysander was finished hugging Lucia, he wrapped his arms around Tom.

Tom's whole body visibly tensed, but he brought his hand to pat Lysander on the back awkwardly, sending a look to Lucia that made her laugh.

"Lysander, honey." The Hufflepuff girl laughed lightly, grabbing Lysander's arm from around Tom's neck seeing as it had been much longer than usually socially acceptable. She pulled him off with significant effort, and he hooked his arm around her shoulders.

"He's absolutely fucked, who let him drink that much?" Lucia asked through laughter, lacing her fingers with Tom's.

"Yeah.... that would be me." The Hufflepuff girl laughed, running her hand through Lysander's messy hair, "I'm Sophia, by the way."

"I'm Lucia, and this is Tom." Lucia responded to be polite, even though Lysander had yelled their names at the top of his lungs in greeting already.

"Ah yes, I know." Sophia smiled awkwardly, and Lucia sensed she'd probably heard some not so kind things about her before, "We were just about to go sit down, do you guys want to come?"

Lucia smiled, having slightly expected Sophia to want to get away from her, "Sure! I'll bring bring a couple of bottles over."

A set of black couches were arranged at the side of the room, a dark oak table in the middle of them littered with empty bottles, cans and cups. Sophia lowered Lysander down on the couch, but of course he pulled her down with him so she sat beside him with her legs swung over his lap. The shy girl looked over at the others with a flustered expression, obviously embarrassed at the public display of affection.

Lucia and Tom sat on the couch opposite, and Lucia put the bottles she'd grabbed from the drinks table in the centre of the table, but kept one to sip as she leant back into the cushiony couch. Her wings and halo from her costume were discarded on the side of the couch in a pile, leaving her just in the small white dress.

"So how did you two meet?" Lucia asked Sophia, pulling her attention from Lysander who was fiddling with the scales of her mermaid costume.

"We have class together, and he asked me to study in the library a couple of times." Sophia blushed, "We're not dating or anything though." She added hurriedly.

Lucia smiled and quirked her eyebrows at the girl, who blushed even more. Lucia chuckled and took a large swig from the bottle of vodka resting in her lap.

The more she drank, the less it tasted like acetone and the more it tasted like the solution to everything.

After a couple of minutes of Lysander drunkenly mumbling in Sophia's ear and Lucia taking relentless sips from the bottle in her hand, Lorcan slid down onto the third couch in the arrangement rather awkwardly.

"Hi everyone." He spoke stiffly, his eyes avoiding Lucia and Tom with a large amount of force. His ears were lightly pink at the tips from being flustered, and his costume was slightly askew.

"My darling brother!" Lysander exclaimed, lurching himself over to bring him into an embrace that Lorcan seemed rather uncomfortable with, "Haven't been up to mischief, have you?"

Lorcan's cheeks went bright red, and Lucia couldn't help but let out a chuckle at his shocked expression.

"Of course not." Lysander answered for him, "You know, you really need to loosen up. Have a drink, get laid or something." He added, shoving a bottle of liquor into his brother's hand. "It really helps, trust me." He had a ridiculously large smile on his face.

"He really can't handle his alcohol, can he?" Tom chuckled in Lucia's ear as Lysander stumbled back next to Sophia on the couch.

"Not one bit." Lucia laughed back, finding humour in her friend's drunkenness.

Lorcan had awkwardly set the bottle on the table and stood up to walk away, obviously regretting his choice of sitting with them after what Tom and Lucia had walked in on.

Lucia took another large gulp of the alcohol in her bottle, not even feeling the burn at the back of her throat anymore. It was beginning to feel like the couch was swaying and she was having trouble focusing her eyes on the faces in front of her.

"Lucia, darling. I think you've had enough." Tom said quietly beside her, reaching his hand toward the bottle held tightly in her grasp to take it from her. From observing her so much in the past, he could tell if she went much longer she'd take it too far.

"I'm fine." She snapped, holding the bottle out of his reach. He sighed and dropped his hand, earning a smile from Lucia as she pressed a kiss to his jaw and leant back into his chest.

Lysander was absolutely gone, his head now on Sophia's lap as she patted his hair softly and looked at him with adoration.

Lucia took one more large gulp from the bottle and stood up, having to catch herself on Tom's knees to stabilise, but was up nonetheless.

"I want to dance again, come." She demanded of Tom, gripping his hand rather tightly and pulling him towards her.

He obliged, of course. Not because he even remotely wanted to dance, but because the thought of her dancing by herself amongst a crowd of hormonal teenagers in this vulnerable state made him incredibly concerned.

Lucia pulled him into the depths of the crowd, her steps stumbling slightly as she made her way to the centre. She stopped when they reached it and pulled Tom towards her by the shirt collar. He tensed his jaw as she began to sway her hips directly against his, her hands moving from his shirt and into his hair with a rather forceful feel.

She brought her mouth to his neck, letting her teeth and tongue graze over his skin as they continued to move to the music.

"Lucia..." Tom warned, his throat vibrating against her lips as he spoke. She was trying to get him turned on and he knew it.

"Tom..." She mocked, whining into his ear, letting her breath tickle his skin.

He chuckled at her taunt, bringing his hand to bunch up in her hair and detach her mouth from him. She just turned around in his grasp, his hand still holding her hair as she leant back into him and began pressing herself against him and grinding with the music.

Tom tilted her neck by means of his hand in her hair so he had access to her ear.

"You just love getting me turned on in public, don't you darling?" He whispered, allowing his lips to touch her skin, "You love to tease me when you know I can't do anything about it."

She nodded against him with a smirk.

"Such a dirty girl." He chuckled, brushing a hair from her face as her bright blue eyes stared up at him.

She began to move again, and this time he let her without any interruptions. She wrapped her arms around his neck from behind her, his large hands coming to rest on her hips to press her into him with more force.

Lucia could feel Tom was getting hard against her, and she couldn't help but smirk.

"You know, from where I'm standing right now, I have a lovely view of down your dress." Tom chuckled in her ear.

"Good." Lucia smiled, pressing into him with just a bit more force, earning a hiss from his closed teeth against her neck.

He had his eyes still fixed down the low neckline of her dress that was visible from his angle. "Fucking hell." He chuckled when he realised she wasn't even wearing a bra.

***

"You're curls are really fucking hot." Lucia slurred as Tom guided her toward the dungeons with him, and she reached out to touch them.

Despite Tom's protests, Lucia had continued to drink much more throughout the night.

"Thank you." Tom laughed after speaking the password to the Slytherin common room.

It was a large effort to get Lucia down the stairs, and through the furniture-filled common room, but they eventually made it to Tom's dorm.

Luckily, none of the others in the dorm had arrived back. Tom didn't know how he would have ever kept Lucia not knocking things over and being quiet enough not to wake them.

"Sit down." Tom said softly, guiding her to his bed and pushing her lightly so she would sit. She laughed lightly when she fell onto the bed, lying herself back with her hair spreading around her, but legs still bent over the end of the bed.

She was rolling side to side, and Tom had to grip her knees to keep her still.

"Darling, stay still so I can get your shoes off." He sighed. She continued to move restlessly, so he just took to holding one foot firmly at a time to undo the intricate buckle of her heel. It was an incredibly fiddly job, especially one-handed when the other was holding her still.

Finally the first one dropped to the ground, and he moved to go to the second shoe. He averted his eyes from the clear view up her dress he had as he unbuckled the second shoe, making much quicker work of this one from practice.

"Come here." He spoke gently, beckoning her with his fingers to stand up from the bed. She grabbed his outstretched hand and pulled herself into his chest. He brought his fingers to tilt her chin up to look at him so he knew she was listening, "Do you want to wear your dress or one of my t-shirts to bed?"

"Yours." She replied happily.

Tom walked to his closet to get a t-shirt and pair of sweatpants from it, throwing them onto the bed lightly and moving back to Lucia.

He hooked his fingers under the hem of her dress and pulled it up slowly over her head. He had to focus his eyes on the white material to stop himself from looking at her bare chest before him.

Lucia leaned forward into him and began kissing his neck, her hands coming to his lower abdomen and toying with his waistband teasingly.

Tom let himself indulge in the feeling for just a moment before he grasped her wrists and detached her from him.

"Lucia, you're completely and utterly plastered." He chuckled, "As much as I'd love to fuck you, I think you'll enjoy it a lot more tomorrow when you can actually remember it."

"I was just thinking we could do some of that kinky shit you wanted to try." Lucia smirked at him, giving him a seductive look.

"Another time." He assured her, picking up the t-shirt from the bed and putting it over her to cover her exposed body before him.

Tom pushed her backwards again and guided her to the head of the bed so that she could lay on the pillow on her side. With a careful eye still on her, he quickly discarded his own clothes and pulled on the sweatpants from the bed, then lay down on the bed beside her. He pulled the curtains closed and covered them both with the silky green covers that were cool to the touch against their hot skin.

His hands found her waist as he pulled her back into him, due to the small proximity of the bed, having to be pressed directly against each other.

A few minutes of silence passed.

"You're very nice." Lucia commented out of the blue.

Tom let out a dry chuckle, "I'm not sure about that, but thank you."

"I mean it, I've never had a guy say no to me when I was drunk before." She mumbled.

"You mustn't have asked many decent guys then." Tom observed.

"Hmm." She responded, but her eyes were closed and Tom could tell she was drifting off. He pulled her closer into him and got lost in his own thoughts until his eyes flickered shut and he too fell into the depths of sleep.

author's note

eeeeek we're so close to 50k I can't believe it!! thank you all so much.

I also updated handcuffs (my new draco fic) if you wanna check it out it would mean the world :))))

also this ended up being a longer chapter than I usually write, but I hope you enjoyed <3

the bar is literally on the floor though like wow he didn't sleep with a drunk girl what a hero.

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