Cats doing backflips and dogs punching people
It all started one gloomy day, when the clouds gathered over the town of bullshit. This was the day.
The day for what exactly? I don't know; no one knows. They all went inside because of the storm.
But unbeknownst to the town's people, a different kind of storm was brewing. A storm like the thunder in your stomach after eating taco bell and downing it with a laxative.... A storm, that was about to hit.
Lightning struck, illuminating the lone figure standing in the field. A dog with soft, golden brown fur and the floppy ears you would expect from a golden retriever. But the dog was not alone. A moment after the lightning flashed across the sky, a small grey cat approached. It was time.
Without a word the pair set of towards a house away from town where a man lived alone. This man wouldn't know what hit him. Or how it hit him.
See, the dog and the cat had sneaked into the man's house and sat next to his bed. They waited; admiring for a moment how peaceful that man looked in his sleep, before they knew it was time to act.
The agile cat climbed onto the back of the dog before standing lightly on its head. The cat then prepared themselves. They leant toward, tail and butt in that air, before jumping across to the wall on the other side of the man and flipping backwards to land on his face. The man awoke due to the sudden due to the sudden force and the sharp pain of claws in his skin
But the man didn't have time to register the pain of the cat before he felt a furry punch to the face an A deafening bark in his ear.
The cat and the dog ran out of the house at full speed, not stopping until they reached an alleyway where they could safely congratulate themselves on a job well done.
"That'll show him. That's what happens when they don't give us treats."
The end (of this story)
