With or Without You (John Taylor)

FIVE

John slid a bill of American money to the older woman running the stand, "Thank you, love. Please keep the change." He walked along with Nick, admiring a jar of homemade honey. He'd never been to a place like this, and since they were delayed a few more nights in Malibu, it was the perfect occasion. The overwhelming aroma of Honeysuckle, Peonies and Wisterias filled the block. Friends and families paraded with each other, smiling and laughing. Patrons of the city all gathered to share their creations and cuisines.
"It'll be nice catching up on sleep in a bed rather than a plane, don't ya think, Johnny?" Nick questioned, filling his mouth with caramel corn.
"Definitely, but I'll be ready to leave this bloody city the minute the curtain comes down." John walked with caution, avoiding every crack in the deterred pavement. "Andy is to meet us for lunch, were you wanting to come along?" The keyboardist offered as John shook his head. There were still a few kinks the band needed to work out about the next segment of shows.
"I ate back at the hotel, I'm just gonna walk around for a little while longer and take a cab back."
Thankfully for the man, they weren't as noticeable in their street gear. Apart from the makeup and hair spray, John was your average American youth.
John crammed his hands into his pockets as he said his goodbyes. He examined every booth available, selling anywhere from flowers and sweets, to jewelry and crafts. He swung his bag by his calves, durable plastic rubbing his fingers raw.
"Pink is still your favorite color, right? I know I wasn't gone that long." John subconsciously zoned in on a conversation that he wasn't invited to, looking at a bundle of roses. He looked over his shoulder, a silhouette appearing far too recognizable. "Your girlfriend would love these. Are you interested?" The merchant persuaded as John jumped from his skin. He gave a silent shake of the head, attempting to keep his cover.
"Yes, it is." The familiar voice struck cords with John, heart beating quicker than it was moments prior. He wanted to stay silent, in hopes it wasn't her. Who was the man? Was it her boyfriend? Brother? John only had one way to find out, but the courage was minimal. He felt his brain clutter with all the things that could go wrong, steering from all the good. The name fell out like a stuffed pig with an apple in its mouth.
"Vada?"
"John." The bassist gave a crooked grin in her direction, looking down under a faded flat brimmed fedora. God, he always wore that stupid hat. Vada craved the day she could pluck it off his head and wear it herself. She craved a lot of things with John.
He admired her frame packed into a pair of tight-rolled jeans with a sweatshirt. Strands of hair outlined her cheekbones in a way only John would notice. The rest of her hair was tucked into a large floppy bun. Her sneakers, full of dirt and creases, told a story. A story of pain and perseverance. Still, in John's eyes, she was the only woman in the room. Her kelly green eyes batted unknowingly, making his heart palpitate. "You look-"
"This is Corey," She interrupted, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "My boyfriend." Corey placed a lazy arm around her waist, nudging closer. "Close friend, actually. Corey O'Donnell. You might have seen some of my photography." He boasted, sticking out a hand to shake. "Uh, no. I haven't, actually."
John cocked a brow in Vada's direction as her cheeks grew every shade of red. He could feel himself turn bitter at Corey's comment. "You should check it out sometime, if you can follow strengthened art."
"I'll pass, actually." Vada bit on the inside of her lip as the two men wrangled back and forth. "Corey, this is actually the bassist of Duran. I met him the night before the show." A frog melded in Corey's throat; a fool among kings. John checked out the man. What was she doing with him? He was 5'6, on a good day and he smelled like sour, cheap cologne. He folded his arms, lobbing the bag handles over his wrist with a sigh. "I don't think I caught that earlier. You're friends?" He asked.

"Friends." Corey slid out before Vada could respond. She had a look of desperation, wishing she could grasp at any interaction he'd give her. "Look, man, I'd like to work with you on some art pieces if you're not too busy." Corey placed an arm on John's shoulder, peering up. "I'll keep that in mind." He turned up his nose, never being one to act so pompous. The remaining respect John had for Corey was obsolete.
"Are you staying at the same hotel?" Vada broke the tension with a voice soft like rain. John nodded, "I'll be there for a few days. Are you on duty tonight?"
"No, but I'll be hoping to see you tomorrow? Still sharing a room with little Nicki?" She laughed, pearlescent teeth making the sun appear dim. "He'll be gone at an art show tomorrow if your friend lets you off his leash." John rubbed the back of his neck before making his sly comment, causing Vada's eyes to shift wider. "I-"
"We should get going, Vada. Here's my card." Corey flicked the cardstock from in between two fingers to John's chest, grabbing her with his freehand. "What the fuck, Vada?" He whispered, avoiding a scene. "I- I don't know what that was about. You gotta believe me, Cor." She pleaded before putting her seatbelt on. Corey glanced in her direction as he put his car in reverse. Vada leaned her head against the glass, remembering how easy her life was a month ago. She folded her sleeve under her fingers, drying an eye.
"You know I can't stay mad at you." Corey planted a hand on her thigh, trying to avoid confrontation. He always attempted to fix his wrongs, even if it was for his own benefit.

The sun turned into a golden haze, shedding an orange hue to the Malibu palms. The water reflected the sky, which kept Vada's attention. Being a midwestern native, the California heat never ceased to relax her.
Erin, Vada's mother, moved the two out to the Golden State after her father's disappearance in '78 to stay with her aunt. Erin grieved more than most with losing Vada's father. There were no answers, only a few men in uniform at the door claiming he'd gone missing in action. Her aunt, Jeanine, sacrificed a lot at the expense of Vada, giving her the proper childhood she deserved while her Erin drowned herself in alcohol and Quaaludes. Aunt Jeanine brought Vada to the boardwalk for funnel cakes and rollercoasters nearly every weekend. Apart from Celeste, Jeanine was the only other shoulder for Vada to cry on.
Vada smiled to herself, watching two teen girls roller skate down the pavement.

"You wanna watch a movie?" Corey asked, throwing his keys in the bowl on the counter. Vada nodded, sitting beside him on the sectional couch. She folded her legs, nuzzling underneath his arm. "You tired?" He questioned, stroking her hair. "Extremely. I'm sorry again, Cor. I love you." She looked up, his eyes meeting down to hers. "I know." The response stung, but Vada was numb.

Vada stretched her arms across the couch, realizing her head was now laying on a pillow as apposed to a body. "Corey?" The clock read 7:30 as she squinted through tired eyes. Maybe he had gone to the bedroom. She moseyed her way to the kitchen, grabbing a drink from the fridge, met with a note on the door.

'Vada, please don't be mad. i'll pay you back when i can. i hope you'll forgive me in time. i love you'

She ran to the bedroom, ransacking her dresser. The money, all the money, was gone. "Please, please, please." Her face got hot, salty tears soaking her cheeks as she tipped the dresser on its side. "What's going on?" Celeste broke into the room, following the commotion. "Corey took the money. It's all gone." She fell to her knees as the clothes filled around her. "You've got to be fucking kidding me. It's okay, we'll get through this."
Celeste sat beside her friend, letting her sob. She wouldn't say I told you so. Though she was thinking it, Vada couldn't bear to hear it. She was just a child herself. "We will be FINE, Vada Jane. Do you hear me? He is NOTHING. He's a liar and a cheat." Vada nodded, taking shallow breaths between whimpers.
This wasn't fair. They worked so hard for their blessings, only for them to get stripped away by the wind. Celeste was furious, but it wasn't the time for violence. "Let it go, Vada. You need to learn from this. Buck up." She didn't want to be grim, but there was no sense in crying over spilled milk.
And then it happened, she snapped. Vada's emotions shut off.
"You're right. God, I want to kill him." She dried her eyes, resting her elbows on her thighs. "Me too. But it's gonna be all right. Okay?"
Vada nodded for the last time, looking up at the ceiling. "Fucking, John." Vada sighed, remembering his offer. "You saw John today?" Celeste confronted, surprised.

"I might have. He told me he had the room to himself tomorrow."
"Vada Jane, why must you always leave out the most important details. You need to go." She smiled, giving her a friendly shove. "You can't be serious. After this? I really don't want any company. I just want to relax tomorrow." Vada rubbed her temples with a strenuous hand.
"There's nothing we can do about it now, man. We can't sulk on this. Money is replaceable. When John leaves you're gonna feel even worse." Celeste's honesty shone brightly in the dim-lit room, making Vada question the outcome of her night. "The least you could do is go get laid for the both of us. Because I heard what went on in this room the other night and even I was unsatisfied."
Vada laughed, "Okay, okay. I just want to get some real, undisturbed sleep for tonight. Can I sleep with you?" Celeste slept on a king mattress that bore sheets of satin and with a tufted pink headboard. Her father bought it as a gift when she moved out. Whereas Vada slept with an old comforter set from Aunt Jeanine and her bed rested on the floor. Her box spring was tattered, with the mattress sinking in the middle. It didn't bug her though, that bed had been through hell and back.
The friend nodded, pulling her into the bedroom. "You get the inside half." Vada had no qualms. She climbed up onto the high pedestal and situated herself against the wall. The sheets slithered across her legs like silk. Heavy down material loved every inch of her body. The brunette traced the designs in the wallpaper, listening to her subconscious.
Her body felt like the Arizona desert, dry and abandoned. Nothing left to give but the dust and scorpions of her past. Her heart was a cavern of deceit and betrayal. Every blink became heavier than the last, exhaustion and deception taking her over. "I was never meant to feel love, was I?" Vada hoped she wasn't too late with John. He'd be a fool to wait around for someone like her. John could have any woman he wanted. Why even stick around for Vada?
Celeste crawled behind her friend, squeezing tight. "It'll get better, babes. Just get some sleep."