In my Thoughts

Chapter 8: You

Justina~

I am woken to the annoying sound of my alarm. I roll over to the other side of the bed to make the damn sound stop. Getting up from my bed I remember what happened last night in his room. I really let my feeling get the best of me. That's what it feels like. It really herts me and now that I think of it, I've been there for him through everything. I've given my all to help him, to let him know what he was putting himself in was wrong. But he didn't listen. I still don't know why he went back to her. If he really wanted me, he would've been feet away from me this morning. I gave him the chance, gave myself the chance show him what I wanted. But he clearly doesn't know what he wants.
We are supposed to be leaving today at twelve. And it's only nine. I decide to get dressed, I can't sit in this hotel room all day and think about his mistake.
Walking down to the coffee shop, I see some of the others here. But I don't see him.
Hit calls me over to his table.
"Hey Justina! What's wrong with you?" He asks nudging my shoulder.
"Im tired." I say yawning.
"Alright." He says looking around. "Where the hell has Con been?" He ask me.
"I- I'm not sure. I think I saw him with Milani last night."
"Oh so that's who I saw him kissing last night."
"Yeah." I say taking a drink of my coffee.
"I saw them at like three in the morning. But I didn't see you a lot last night."
"You saw them at there? Where were they?" I ask. I went in him room at two. He must have went back to her, right after he was with me.
"They were outside of his door. I'm the next door down."
"Damn" I say rolling my eyes.
"You seem agitated."
"Yeah, I just wonder why he would do that."
"I don't know. He hasn't been around a lot either. Mabey he's happy?"
"Hmm I don't know." He nods his head and says, " Only he knows." I get I'm from the chair and I walk towards the elevator to go upstairs.
Once I get in my room, I start pack my stuff.
The last thing left is his shirt. I decide to return it to him. Not because I want him to apologise for what he did. Nor do I want him to tell me he wants me again. I just want this to be over. I tired of us being confusing. If he wants to be with Miani than he can have it. If he's not afraid to move on, than neither am I. I want distance.

~12:00~

Justina~

We're sitting on the tour bus waiting for some of the others. I decide to grab my phone from my purse, which I haven't looked at scene last night.
"I want to talk to you"
I read the message he sent only five minutes ago.
"Im on the bus. We're waiting for you."
I send him.
If only he would have stayed with me, we would be on the bus together.
Once again my thoughts inter my head. I want them to never enter my head again.
Minutes later, he walks over to his bunk. He doesn't say anything either. From all of the silence around me, I eventually fall asleep.
I feel someone nudge me causing me to wake up.
I see him grabbing his phone from his bed. He shakes his head and walks towards the bathroom.
"What was that about?" The words slip out of my mouth.
"She keeps saying shit. Just to make things worse."
"What the fuck is she saying then?"
"Why does it fucking matter? Stay out of it!" He says looking at me.
"You were the one to mess up last night. I'm sorry you put your self in that position. You and her must be great for each other, you both clearly don't stay true to your words and you don't know what the fuck you want."
"I do know what I want!"
"Than tell me what you want."
"I want to find Milani and fuck her." He says looking away from me.
Those words flew out of his mouth really fast. I don't think he actually meant it. I hope he didn't.
I start grabbing my things to exit the bus.
"Where is everyone?"
"They are leaving." He says.
I have no idea why we are the last two people left on the bus.
After I grab all of my stuff, I walk out of the bus.
"Justina." He opens the door and calls my name.
"What?"
"What do you want?"
"I told you last night. But im releasing you don't want the same thing as me. So now I want a man who doesn't fuck around with bitches, just because he don't know what the hell he fucking wants!" I say walking off towards the door to the airport.