T or D Book 3: DO OR DIE

Supernatural Hell Part 7/? (D.O.D.)

Air: No.

Nightflyer: That's boring.

Kelp: The more risque and forbidden the love is, the better.

Rainkeeper: Right now we're ready a love story about the president's son and the prince of England being in love and it is HILARIOUS AND WONDERFUL.

Seashell: It's called Red White and Royal Blue, go read it.

Nightflyer: Not the current U.S. President's son, to clarify. It's the son of a the first woman president, Ellen Claremont.

Air: Who is a mood.

Joy: I like her.

Leviathans: *close in around them*

Hosts: *do not care*

Kelp: We're invincible here, right?

Seashell: Uh, no?

Hosts:.......

Joy: *sigh* I'll protect most of you.

Joy: Kelp get in the middle, that way they'll kill the others first.

Nightflyer: Ouch.

Air: Anyone else getting flashbacks to a certain shotgun carousel?

Joy: NEVER SPEAK OF THE SHOTGUN CAROUSEL.

Deathbringer: *finds a sharp stick, uses it to kill the Leviathans*

Deathbringer: MAN, it's been awhile since I've killed something!

Deathbringer: *decapitates a vampire*

Deathbringer: This is kinda fun.

Deathbringer:......

Deathbringer: *goes on a killing spree with the Hosts trailing behind him*

Joy: I knew this would happen.

Rainkeeper: You can really see the resemblance between you two.

Deathbringer: *drags a Leviathan to a river and starts drowning him while laughing*

Air: *gasps*

Nightflyer: What? Is it too graphic for you? We can go home, I'll take you home, where it's safe-

Air: No, look! THIS IS THE SPOT WHERE DEAN FINALLY FOUND CAS AND THEY HUGGED! *squeals*

Kelp: They also nearly DIED-

Air: I love Purgatory....

Joy: A bit too much, if your bookmarks are any indication-

Air: SHUT UP.

Joy: Why is Dean X Cas X Benny even a thing?

Air:....DEATHBRINGER CAN I BORROW YOUR WEAPON?

Deathbringer: Okay!

Air: I'm gonna kill you now.

Joy: I thought you'd never ask!

Air/Joy: *attack each other*

Nightflyer: And now all hell's broken loose-

Satan: Again?

Hosts: *scream and trample each other and fall down at the sight of Lucifer*

Deathbringer: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MARK PELLIGRINO!

Lucifer: What?

Deathbringer: Oh dear Satan...

Lucifer: That's me. Who are you?

Deathbringer: I'm Deathbringer.

Lucifer:.......That's the coolest  name ever.

Deathbringer: I know. I live up to it too.

Lucifer: Oh yeah? How would you kill Mary Winchester?

Deathbringer: Light her on fire for irony purposes, of course, but that would have to be the end. I'd start with some toothpicks and a ballpeen hammer and- *describes the most slow, horrid, death ever*

Satan: *staring at him in awe*

Deathbringer: Well?

Lucifer: Can we be best friends?

Deathbringer: Promise not to sacrifice me to a goat?

Lucifer: Promise. I don't know where all the goat stuff comes from honestly, I think it was Michael's idea of a cruel joke, anyways. *snaps and explodes several leviathans*

Lucifer: Who are your friends?

Deathbringer: Oh, my darling children, my daughter's boyfriend, their friends, AKA my tormentors-

Lucifer: Want me to kill them for you?

Air: It would be an honor to be murdered by you, Mister Satan, sir.

Joy: *nods frantically*

Nightflyer: Air, no, we're not Satanists-

Air: BUT IT'S MARK FREAKIN PELLEGRINO-

Nightflyer: AIR, NO.

Air: BUT-

Nightflyer: Remember the season 12 finale?

Air:.....

Air: You're right, he had to die.

Deathbringer: You can't kill him, he's my friend!

Air: A friend that MURDERED MY CASSIE AND HURT JACK-

Lucifer: Hey, at least I didn't take Cas to Super Hell-

Air: *explodes into fire like Jack Jack from the Incredibles and tackles Lucifer*

Joy: Oh my moons, it's like if Mary jumped off the ceiling while burning and attacked the Yellow Eyed Demon.

Kelp: Ooooo-

Deathbringer: *starts fighting Air*

Deathbringer: BAD AIR! LEAVE SATAN ALONE!

Joy: Satan is soft like a bunny.

Kelp: Joy, no.

Nightflyer: Uh, guys?

Air: I'LL KILL YOU-

Lucifer: *laughing*

Nightflyer: GUYS-

Hosts: *look around*

Rainkeeper: Uh oh.

Leviathans: *have surrounded them with a small army of monsters*

Joy: *sigh* I knew we should've brought more weapons.