chuuya's little accident

the disappearance

"EEEEE?" he looked around, arms and legs out warily. nothing. nothing, nothing, nothing.
he swung open the door the bathroom. all gone. his room. all gone. everything was in its place.

"bruh," chuuya said.

he set the gloves down on the counter and slouched his way over to the couch. he sat down and covered his head with his hands. am i imagining all this? no, not even someone as cool as me could make this up.

unlike the last time, chuuya quickly regained his senses. "nah, it doesn't even matter." he got back up and went to his bedroom.

he began to flip everything over to make sure there was really nothing left of what he had seen before.

he was still traumatized from the bathroom, but he ain't no pussy so he walked in there too.

clean, all clean and not a smudge left. as for the smell, normal.. no in fact, it was a clean, fresh smell. like some good, uhhh alcohol. yeah, that makes sense. anyway, i should probably change her bedding and food.

"WAAAIT A MINUTE" chuuya screeched as he remembered something he would consider important. "I LEFT NUT HERE." he bolted to the space beside his bed where two beady eyes were poking out beneath some bedding.

it was a small ferret, almost the size of chuuya's di-i really hope she's okay. he peered into the cage and picked nut up.

she did her usual thing and tried to crawl up on his right shoulder, but he kept scanning her and sniffing around (perv).

thankfully, everything was the same. "ah, nut, good to know you're in good shape," he gave a weird smirk and placed her back in the cage. 

"SQUEEEWEWEEEE," said nut, in a what chuuya filtered as a friendly welcome back but what was really a few curses towards the ginger.  he stared at her with his big scary ass blue eyes for a bit, trying to transfer his love or something. nut stared back and considered how he would taste in a sandwich.

he replaced her bedding like a good ferret father would and gave her a few homeade treats with ferret-safe frosting that wrote "i love nut" on top.  "she better like those i put my soul into them," he said, almost throwing one into her mouth (i call animal abuse).

"ANYWAY i should probably get outside or something, staying here would be kinda lame." he looked around just to make sure everything looked normal. other than the toilet paper roll on the counter, everything seemed fine.

chuuya did a double take. "i'm sorry but what the fuck is this doing on my counter?" he continued to pick it up and inspect it. a note fluttered down. he raised his hand just in case but realized it was just paper and that he had been overreacting like a little bitch.

he unfolded it and saw that there was writing in some kind of ugly colored sharpie . "who the hell uses forest green as a sharpie color to write notes??" he asked as he began to read :
haha lol get shitfaced

chuuya slammed the note on the counter and looked around. "WHAT THE HELL IS THIS ALL ABOUT???!" he screamed at the top of his lungs, not even worrying about the poor, poor neighbors just next door.

"WHAT DO YIU EVEN WANT?? MONEY? HERES FIFTY BUCKS NOW LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE." his short legs wobbled to the living room.

u could almost see the smoke coming from his ears, and his face looked like 2nd day cycle period blood ( listen i didn't know what simile to use it was either that or fruit punch popsicle ).

nut was squeaking from her cage. he barked at her and sat on the couch. well shit i mean it can't get worse than this.

he tried looking out at the sun to look cool down but got bored and got up to turn on his console. from there he played the new spider-man and hatsune miku: project diva. right as he was about to finish weekender girl he heard a knock at the door.

"bruh i was literally doing perfect," he said as kaito started silently dancing (that was a bunch of references to the game go play it it's free).

nevertheless he hauled himself up and walked towards the front door. "yeah who is it?" he questioned.

no response. he tried standing on his tiptoes to reach the peephole, but eventually had to whip out the kiddie stool.

no one was there, and the entire hallway seemed to be empty.  he pushed the stool away and turned the lock.

he was going to open the door when he decided to put the stool back in the bathroom closet so no one unwanted saw it (consider it an insecurity).

he started opening the door slowly, but nothing popped out at him suddenly so he just swung that bitch on its hinges.

a small package lay in front of him. it was kind of a violet shade of wrapping material with a lovely sparkly green bow and ribbon.  he bent down (wasn't really hard for him to get to the floor level he's basically already there) and went to open it.

"before i open this i just wanna say whoever did this sucks at picking out colors." he stayed silent for a moment to see if MAYYBE someone would respond.

at first he thought he heard a "stfu u dumbass hoe no one likes you go cry to ur mom or something," but he figured it was a hallucination.

"lame," he said under his breath. he shook any weird feeling hovering in the air and stuck out his hand to grab the ribbon.