The journey of destiny

Chapter 9

Will slowly walked through the many streets. Finding his way back to the castle wasn’t hard: the enormous building towered above all the others, so he just had to look up to it to know which way he needed to go. Even though he knew apologizing for his rage was the polite and right thing to do, he was still anxiously looking up to the moment he had to face everyone. He was ashamed, there was no doubt about that, but he hadn’t forgiven Owen and his father just yet. He tried to shrug it away, deciding he’d just have to go with the moment, but the uneasy feeling didn’t completely disappear.
            As he reached the gate in the palace wall, worrying the guards would stop him from going back into the castle, he took notice of a light at the top of the stairs. He didn’t remember a guard standing there that morning. He figured the guarding schedule must differ at night. He nervously walked through the gate, waiting for the moment someone would call him back. That moment didn’t come; as soon as the guards saw him, they nodded and gestured to the stairs. Will was afraid the king and queen had been insulted by his sudden outburst and that something much worse than being interrogated at the gate was coming to him. This fear made the climb up the stairs seem much longer, as if for every step he took, one hundred more were added. It was completely different than earlier that day, when it had been a magnificent experience. He really started to regret leaving the castle in the first place.
            Being drowned in his own misery and regret, Will was utterly surprised to find that the one holding a candle on the top of the stairs, was no one less than queen Allyn. His mouth fell open. He couldn’t believe his eyes! Here he was, afraid everyone was mad at him, facing the queen who smiled remissibly at him.
“Will you come with me, please?” the queen asked soothingly, before Will could manage to say something. “We would like to shed some light on the confusing moments you have been experiencing.” Will just nodded, not sure what else he could answer in front of the queen. Reluctantly, he followed her into the castle. Why couldn’t sir Steven or Owen come to get him themselves? Why would they need the queen to do that? His anger flared up again, but it quickly changed into confusion as the queen put her arm around him, leading him through the many hallways. He didn’t understand what was going on. His father and tutor felt like strangers, the way they’d treated him the past few days, while the king and queen – the actual strangers – behaved as though they’d known him their whole lives. ‘Confused’ didn’t even seem to cover the way he felt.
“Where did you go just now?” queen Allyn asked curiously, snapping him out of his thoughts.
“Nowhere,” Will answered vaguely. “I just looked around here and there.” He wasn’t able to focus on his explanation, as queen Allyn’s arm still rested casually around his shoulders. Was she trying to gain his trust, so he would tell her what was on his mind? Perhaps she had also spoken out of line? No, that couldn’t be it; she was the queen! Will racked his brains trying to come up with a logical explanation, but he found none. 
“And have you seen anything interesting while you were doing that?” the queen continued, seeming to be genuinely interested in what he had to say. Will suppressed the urge to give her a strange look and thought about what he would reply for a few seconds.
“Yes,” he decided finally. “I think I have.” He thought of the girl he’d met earlier; she had been nice. Queen Allyn nodded, as if to encourage him to continue, but Will didn’t feel like chatting. He was confused, a little mad and perplexed. Nothing around him seemed to make sense anymore. He needed some time alone, to think and get everything sorted out. He took a deep breath, knowing that he first had to face the king, Owen and sir Steven, before he could excuse himself and get some rest.
            Queen Allyn let her arm slide off of him, after having patted him on the shoulder. She turned to an oak door on her left, one of the many in the castle. This time, Gavin didn’t rush over to open the door for her; he probably had other obligations. Will’s anxiety level reached a maximum and his feet were aching to run away. But as if he was in a trance, not able to control himself, Will walked past queen Allyn, who gestured for him to go in first, into a spacious parlour, where the king, sir Steven and Owen were waiting. Startled, Will found that the other trainees were absent. I am in big trouble, Will thought, feeling trapped. Queen Allyn closed the door behind them and led him further into the room.
            The men looked up at them and to avoid their glances, Will took a look around, hoping to be able to turn down the panic building up inside him. The parlour was extremely large: the ceiling above the middle of the room was at least four storeys high. From there, it sloped down on either side, creating a roof shaped like an upside down V, like in a tent. It was held up by complicated framework made out of wood. The enormity of the space made Will feel tiny, which didn’t really help in the situation at hand. A great part of one wall, the one opposite him, was covered in windows, giving a spectacular view of the city spreading out below. Behind him, a fireplace warmed the room. The largest part of the parlour was colourfully furnished; in the centre were some couches, chairs and cushions encircling a table. To the side were some bookcases and the entire floor was covered in rugs. Will found the room quite pleasant. It had an aura of family. Will couldn’t exactly put his finger on it what made him feel this way, but he liked the parlour. More than queen Allyn’s gentle approach to him, this place soothed him; it was completely different from the overwhelming guest room he had been in earlier that day. With a little of his confidence restored he walked over to the couches, where the four others were waiting for him. He took a deep breath.
“I-I’m sorry for my behaviour earlier,” Will croaked. “I didn’t mean to shout at you like that. I just… I’m sorry.” As soon as he’d said that, the tension and anger that had built up inside him melted away. Much to his displeasure, he felt tears welling up behind his eyes. He hated that side effect of having been very mad; this always happened to him.
            Sir Steven smiled. “Don’t worry, Will. There’s nothing to blame on you. We should’ve told you why we went here in the first place.” Will frowned.
“What do you mean?” he asked suspiciously. Bewilderment fell upon him once again. They weren’t mad at him? Why should they have told him the reason they’d come here? The questions tumbled around in his head, making it impossible to think clearly.
“Have a seat, Will,” king Wystan said gently, gesturing to one of the couches. Gladly, Will did as he was told, his head still spinning.
“There is something you should know about, well, you,” Owen said, not making things any clearer.
“What do you mean?” Will repeated slowly. He started to get a headache. He yearned for some time alone; he needed to clear his mind, if only for a few moments. He stared into the fire, as if trying to shove his many thoughts out of his mind, into the flames.
“Well… It’s a long story,” sir Steven finally sighed, nervously trying to look Will in the eyes. Will didn’t take his gaze off the flames, though. Unnoticed by the adults in the room, Will rolled his eyes. Everything seemed to be a long story nowadays.
“Just start at the beginning. The sooner you start, the earlier you’re done,” he said, barely able to hide his annoyance.
“Right…” sir Steven said and then silence set in again. Will looked up to give him a stare-down. He raised an eyebrow as if to say ‘Well, what are you waiting for? Get on with it!’, which was exactly the thought that was on his mind. “Okay,” sir Steven started eventually. “Do you remember my father?” Will nodded. Of course he did. He had never met the man, but he had heard more than enough stories about him.
“Sir John, loyal protector and friend of the royal family, who led the defence of the castle during the first Dragon War, about fifteen years ago, and now lives in the north of the kingdom near Amaryllis Lake,” he summed up quickly. Sir Steven smiled.
“Exactly. And do you remember sir Peter?” he continued. Again, Will nodded, not sure what these people had to do with sir Steven and Owen’s strange behaviour.
“Yeah, your best friend, who took care of me when you had disappeared, before he vanished as well,” Will stated matter-of-factly. The king looked as if he wanted to say something, but sir Steven hastily went on with his story. Interesting, Will thought.
“That’s right,” sir Steven said. “As you might know, Peter and I were both trained by my father before the first Dragon War, here at the castle. When the war broke out, we tried our best to help, but we were only slightly older than you are now. We were more of a distraction to sir John than of help.” Sir Steven paused for a moment, seeming lost in memories of the past. His face turned serious again, when he looked up to look Will in the eyes. “The attack of the dragons came out of the blue. The greatest part of the army was still scattered all of the land, at home will their families. It didn’t take long until we realized the attack was led by Theron, a man who had gone by unnoticed by most people until the moment he seized power and charged.” Theron. That name was new to Will. Was he Tarah’s father? He had to be, considering he had led the dragons to war. It was a strange idea that someone who had a child could do something like that. A wry smile found its way to Will’s face. It reminded him an awful lot of Bryan’s father, sir Nicholas. Who knew what he was doing in Chadale, their hometown, at that moment…
            The adults sent him questioning looks, probably wondering what was on his mind, but Will just gestured for sir Steven to continue; he did not intend to share any of his thoughts until everything was clear.
“Anyways, within several weeks, the dragons had managed to take over most of the kingdom. Only the capital, where we are now, was being protected at all cost, by us. Every day, more dragons came to make our jobs harder and harder, until the day sir John was afraid we’d lose the castle and advised the king and queen to get to safety.” Will glanced over to the king and queen themselves, who were silently sitting on a couch opposite him, sad expressions on their faces. Will could imagine that it wasn’t easy for them to relive that moment all over again. “Peter and I stayed near my father the entire time as he escorted them to an escape route. Queen Allyn, though, kept resisting. She yelled, screamed and cried, trying to get back into the castle.” Will peeked at the queen from the corner of his eye. It was impossible for him to imagine her doing that; she had been calm and gentle the entire time. “It took a while before my father managed to understand why: her baby was still inside.” Will frowned slightly. He had never heard of a royal baby. Would it have died during the war? He couldn’t figure it out. “King Wystan realized this as well and he managed to break free of the guards, running out into the open. A dragon was very pleased with that and planned on roasting him. Then the event that resulted in me being knighted occurred: …” sir Steven said. Will didn’t give him the opportunity to finish, though.
“You saved him,” he said. Sir Steven looked disappointed; he wanted to tell it himself. Will stuck his tongue out at him.
“Yes, precisely,” Steven agreed, before continuing his story. “I happened to save him. It was sheer luck for both of us: if I hadn’t tripped over my own feet, I wouldn’t have taken him down in my fall, and we both would’ve been a dragon meal.” Will chuckled. Sir Steven, tripping over his own feet? That was not something that happened every day.
“It doesn’t matter how you put it,” king Wystan said, “You saved my life and I’m still grateful!” Sir Steven managed to smile for a moment, then he turned all serious again.
“With the help of the dragons that were still approaching, I convinced the king to get himself to safety. As soon as he rejoined sir John, I went into the castle myself. I know, it wasn’t the smartest idea, but someone needed to do something. Inside, everything was just one big chaos. A lot of people were still trapped in there, too scared to leave. I believe I told them to go to the same escape route as the one I’d left earlier, but with everyone, including myself, panicking, I don’t know how many people actually got the message.”
“Oh, quite a few, actually,” queen Allyn said. “About two dozen of our staff members joined us. I already wondered where they had come from!” She smiled and sir Steven took that as his cue to continue.
“I had no idea where I needed to look. As you might have noticed, this castle is enormous! Back then, it was even greater, but some parts have been destroyed during the wars. I was running around, blind with panic, not knowing where to go or who I could trust. Every now and then I’d even see a glimpse of a dragon, but I’d just turn a corner and continued the other way. After what felt like an eternity, I reached a more central part of the castle, where the noise of the war was no more than a feint rumble somewhere in the distance. I calmed down a bit and started to think a bit more rational. I realized I knew where the royal chambers were and figured that was probably the best place to start looking.
            However, when I was halfway there, I faced a boy of about thirteen years old, holding the baby I was looking for. Not knowing what else to do, I pointed my sword at him, hoping he was on my side. My sudden action startled the boy, so when I asked him who he was and what he was doing, he answered immediately. He claimed to be the queen’s younger brother and because a dragon decided to chase after us, I had no choice but to trust him. We managed to get out of the castle and tried to join sir John and the king and queen, but we were completely cut off from them, so we could only flee. We’ve been travelling for weeks until we found a relatively safe town where nobody knew us. We kept a low profile there and as soon as it was possible, we wrote a letter to my father, telling him we were somewhere safe.
            Sir John, king Wystan and queen Allyn were all very happy to hear that, but we all knew the enemy was not defeated. We had survived this battle, but the war was far from over. That’s why they told us to stay where we were, with the baby, as long as necessary. A few years later, Peter, who had been knighted by then, joined us and he finished my training. He helped us to get settled in the town and to stay in touch with sir John, until that was no longer necessary and we could live independently.” Will let the entire story sink in for a moment. He had never heard of anything like this and it was hard to wrap his mind around it.
“That’s all very nice,” he said slowly. “But what does this have to do with your odd behaviour the past time?” Will looked at sir Steven and Owen, who exchanged uncertain glances. Eventually, sir Steven took a deep breath and looked him in the eye.
“Will, that baby, that’s you,” he said. Will blinked.
“So you’re saying…”
“I’m not your father, Will.” At first, Will had trouble processing the words. Then his mouth fell open. He couldn’t believe a word of it, though in his mind the pieces of the puzzle quickly fell together. Was this some kind of mean joke? A prank from his fellow trainees, as a reaction to his own joke at the Sugary Pony? Deep down, he knew sir Steven was telling the truth, but he was far from ready to accept it. He felt like running back out, kicking a wall, screaming at the world.
            Instead, he just sat there, unmoving.
“Will?” queen Allyn – who had to be his mother – said hesitantly. Will slowly turned his gaze towards her, trying to figure out how he felt, how he should feel, and what he needed to do or say. A mixture of all kinds of feelings churned inside him; he felt deceived – his entire life had been one big lie. He felt regret, sadness and desperation, but also a tiny bit happiness, for this was the first time he had a mother. Confusion got the better of him; he didn’t know how to tell real from wrong, or his actual life from the made-up cover. It felt as if his whole world had been grabbed by an unknown force, had been shaken until nothing was as it had been before and then put back for him to try and make sense of it. It all became a little too much.
“I just… I need to…” Will managed to say, before he got up and blindly stumbled out of the parlour.
            He was glad nobody followed him or called him back, but he didn’t have much time to think about that. Realization that what had just been told him what the truth and everything else had been a lie dawned upon him. All those hours spent with sir Steven in the forest, learning, all those times it had only been the two of them, enjoying themselves, all those days they had been invited over at sir Peter’s place or at some official celebration: all fake. Nothing of his life had been real. It made it hard to breath, hard to keep going on through the maze that the endless hallways of the castle formed. Will didn’t know who he could trust anymore, if he could even trust anyone. His world collapsed in front of his eyes, and there was nothing he could do about it. Even if sir Steven suddenly jumped around another corner, yelling: ‘Gotcha! It was just a joke. Let’s go home!’, it would never be the same again.
            Somehow he managed to find the way back to his chamber, where he locked himself in, trying to fight the feeling of abandonment that came over him; How come it had taken all these years to tell him? If they’d only let him know, if they’d only told him the truth… It would have been so much easier to take it in. He let himself fall flat on his bed, a king-sized four poster shielded off by dark, thick curtains. It didn’t feel right. The bed was too big, too soft, too much of a plea from the king and queen: ‘Please forget the past fifteen years. Here you have some comfort. It will make up for everything, right?’. No, Will didn’t feel like forgiving or forgetting; he just wanted to go home. He just wasn’t so sure what ‘home’ was at the moment. Was it back at Chadale? Or was it now here, in this castle, in the city of Fraede? He started to think there was no home anymore, not like this. He took a deep, shaky breath. Why would they do this? Why did they need to ruin everything he believed in? He didn’t know.
            Before he got too much time to think about it, there was a knock on his door.
“Hey, Will, you back yet?” someone whispered. Will sat up, looking at the door.
“Yes,” he sighed at last, hoping the person would be satisfied with his answer and leave him alone. Sadly, that was not going to happen.
“Great!” the person said and now Will recognized the voice as Bryan’s. It was silent for a moment. Will decided to get up and took place on one of the chairs near the fire, that was still happily dancing around over the wood. Will stared into the flames, wishing he could be just like them: changing whenever it suited him, not having to care about anything else, never being stopped…
            The door flew open and Bryan came in, quickly followed by Leon, Adam, Noah and Nathan. Will wondered if they were actually his friends, or if they’d been hired to make his life in Chadale seem are real as possible. Did they know? Would they all have been part of the plan? They didn’t seem to notice Will’s troubled expression.
“We’ve been checking every ten minutes if you were back again,” Bryan started enthusiastically.
“You made quite the show at dinner!” Leon chuckled, grinning from ear to ear.
“You should have seen sir Steven’s face!” Adam laughed. Will didn’t reply. The only thing he could think about was the look on sir Steven’s face when he told him he was not Will’s father.
“Are you spies?” Will asked utterly serious. The guys looked at him, surprised by this unexpected question.
“Why, yes, of course we’re spies,” Leon said. “Secretly, we’ve been spying on you forever, wondering if you’ll do something interesting.” Will, who didn’t get the hint of sarcasm in Leon’s voice, groaned and covered his face with his hands. Why was this happening to him? Nothing was real. It was as though he’d waken up to find that his life had only been a dream and he was actually a different person. He felt a complete stranger to himself.
“What? I was joking!” Leon said, a little worried about Will’s reaction. “Y’know, our prank war? Started at the Sugary Pony…” his voice trailed away.
            Bryan, who knew Will a little better than the others, sat down opposite him.
“What’s going on, Will?” he said silently. “You know we’re not really spies or anything, right?” Will didn’t reply. Bryan exchanged glances with the other boys; it was clear to all of them that something was wrong, very wrong. “Will, what happened? They didn’t forbid you to talk, did they?” Will peeked out from under his hands, giving Bryan a look. “Hey, I know that face!” Bryan joked. “Apparently I said something stupid! Hurray!” Will managed a weak smile and dropped his hands to his lap.
“No, they didn’t forbid me to speak,” he sighed.
“Well, that’s good,” Bryan said sincerely. “What happened then? Did your father get mad at you? Sir Steven can be pretty intimidating when he’s mad…” Will felt a knot in his stomach. They didn’t know. He needed to tell them. But telling them meant that he needed to accept the fact that sir Steven was not his father. He needed to face reality. He was not sure whether he could do that just yet.
“That’s the thing,” he eventually said slowly. “You see, sir Steven… he’s… Well…” Will stuttered. He closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. He had to accept it. They deserved to know. “Sir Steven is not my father.”
            For a moment, nothing happened. Then Bryan burst out laughing.
“Yeah, right,” he said. “You want us to believe that? Not your father… Sure, Will, sure.” But as Will didn’t do more than flinch at these words, Bryan started to realize he was telling the truth.
“But… Wait, what?” he said, flabbergasted.
“If he’s not your father, then who is?” Nathan asked suspiciously. Will did not have to answer, for the door opened yet again, revealing king Wystan.
“We need to talk, Will,” he said nervously. “Avoiding us won’t change the matter at hand.” Bryan looked from Will to the king and back. His eyes grew wide as realization dawned upon him. It didn’t take the other boys much time to come to the same conclusion.
“Is he…?” Leon asked unbelievingly. Will nodded reluctantly. There was no denying it now…
            The five trainees looked at Will in awe, as though he suddenly changed into a different person. Bryan even bowed before him, obviously overreacting. Will gave him another look.
“Bryan, will you please act normal?!” he asked, laughing nervously. “I’m still the same me.” Bryan straightened his back.
“I’m sorry, but you’re a prince now. This is awesome!” he exclaimed, a grin splitting open his face.
“Yeah, sure,” Will mumbled. “It doesn’t get more awesome than this…” Bryan ignored him.
“Oooh, maybe this has got something to do with that painting!” They exchanged glances and Will realized Bryan could be right: this could have to do with The Hall of Memory. He also remembered the many paintings in which he’d seen himself in the other hall that had been shown to him by the strange man before they’d gone to the Sugary Pony. This was certainly something to think about…
“Will? Come, please,” king Wystan said, interrupting his thoughts. “Now.” Will slowly got up and walked over to the man that he ought to call his father from that moment on.