"You sure about this? If you need more time we can postpone it?" I shook my head.
"No I'm ready. I just want everything to go back to normal. I want the tour to start up. I want to get in the studio and do some recording"
"You want to walk down the streets holding my hand. Post cheesy selfies of us on twitter and instagram. You want to lay on a beach with me underneath the stars" Zayn teased with a cheeky smile, I laughed loudly.
"Well yeah it'd be nice to do all that" I commented.
"Once this is out the way we'll do all of it and more" Zayn said before pressing his lips against mine.
I'd been home from hospital for two weeks now. I've spent the whole time hidden away at home. Neither myself or Zayn had gone on twitter or the internet. We've spent our time watching netflix and eating meals that Zayn's mum had maken for us. I finally decided it was time for me to get back on track. Things were looking brighter in my life and I wanted to get back to doing what I love. I wanted to get back to performing. I knew before I did that I'd have to answer everyones burning questions. There was no way I could avoid it. I didn't want to lie about what happened and I didn't want to brush all this under the carpet. The fans have so much love and support for me I feel like I owe them the truth. Zayn and I had a conversation with Simon and I told him I didn't want to do a TV interview or a magazine interview. I wanted it to be just me explaining what happened and getting things out in the open. I didn't want people interrupting me and I didn't want my words to be twisted. Simon recommended I do a livestream and straight away I agreed. Once the boys found out what would be happening they insisted on being there for it. They wanted to give me support. I couldn't say no. They'd all been amazing to me throughout this whole thing. We were going live at 5PM and as much as I was looking forward to getting things out in the open I was also nervous about what people would say. I wasn't worried about myself, I was worried about Zayn. We were going to be honest about everything and I was afraid people would direct hate towards Zayn. Zayn assured me that he didn't care what people say. And when he said it I knew he meant it.
I sat infront of the camera watching on as everything was finalized. Liam brought me a glass of water and I took a light sip of it.
"My hearts racing" I exclaimed, Zayn placed his hand on my knee giving it a gentle squeeze.
"Don't over think anything Ni" Harry said softly.
It's just our family. Our massive 1D family. You'll be speaking to people you love. All our fans care about you" Louis assured me, I nodded my head.
"Do you want me to start everything off?" Liam asked when we got the two minute warning. I shook my head.
"No just stay with me guys" I pleaded with them.
"Were right here" Liam assured me he then took his seat behind me along with Harry and Louis, Zayn was sat right beside me. I looked at the man who was giving me the thumbs up. I took a deep breath.
"Hi everyone watching. Thankyou for tuning into this livestream at such short notice" My palms were sweating. "I don't exactly know how to start this. You all saw the video I posted a few weeks ago and since then there's been so much speculation. So many questions that haven't been answered for obvious reasons. At the time I didn't want to talk but now I do. I want to explain everything but I wanted to do it this way because I wanted everything to come from me. I didn't want things being edited out, I didn't want my words being twisted until they wern't mine anymore. I want you all to know the truth" I looked at Zayn and he smiled warmly at me.
Chapter Eleven
Start from the beginning
