Queen Of The Hills

Chapter V

A MOTHER'S TOUCH

Simmy was watching the wedding rites of Sangita with a lot of interest mixed with a certain degree of amusement. Two persons, hitherto strangers, would become one, from the morrow. Granted, Sangita may be knowing this quivering but pleased as punch, what-was-the-prick's name, from before, but opening up completely, the gates of one's life to another, was serious business after all. 'No package deal   of satisfaction guaranteed or money back offer here,' thought she whimsically. She for one would never think of marrying a stranger who could not even manage to stand his ground, on such a red letter day of their union. 

A small placard at the corner read 'Sangita weds Prashant'. Simmy couldn't help smiling at the anomaly. The word 'Prashant' meant sober and at the moment the guy was anything but that.   

The wedding rites were being performed as per Hindu customs, in front of the wedding hawan kund or fire place. The fireplace was decorated with colourful flowers, leaves, beans and grains. The items being used in performing the Havan or sacred rites, were a special mixture of medicinal herbs, roots, dry fruits, wood and ghee and was being offered as an oblation, into the Havan Kund fire. This was accompanied with Sanskrit Mantras being chanted by a priest. 

While all this was going on, Simmy saw something that warmed her heart. While the couple offered the oblation into the fire, Prashant was holding on to the hand of Sangita, very tenderly and affectionately, a habit which comes from familiarity. So they did know each other from before!

The air was very stuffy, what with the heat originating from the flickering fire in the hawan kund and the resultant smoke being generated. Sangita was dressed in heavy bridal  clothes and ornaments and had sweat pouring down her face, tampering with some of her bridal make up. Sangita's mother, who was seated a few feet away from her, would every now and then, lean towards her daughter and wipe her forehead with a hanky, preventing the sweat from going into her eyes. The mother would also correct the chunni, which would sometimes slide off Sangita's shoulders.  In response, Sangita would make these small shrugs, as if she were being embarrassed by her mother's overt attention;  gestures which every pampered child makes near his or her mother, whatever the age. The mother's concern for her daughter increased over time, as the ceremony dragged on through the night and Sangita's discomfiture kept on increasing. Simmy knew that Sangita was asthmatic. Once the mother even offered Sangita a glass of water, which she readily gulped. 

All these interactions between the mother and daughter, may not have caught the eyes of most of the persons present in the hall, but it certainly was not lost on at least one person. And that person was Simmy! The touching maternal gestures caused familiar stirrings in her insides. The umbilical cord between a mother and child is severed at the birth of the child. What is not severed and remains for life, is the invisible umbilical cord uniting the two souls. 

Simmy was moved beyond words as she suddenly remembered Vinita. 'Oh Mother! You heartless mother! If only you know how much I remember you,' thought she,' Am I  weak? Why can't I bury her with her memories once and for all?'

Sitting near the fire she remembered most of the intimate moments she had with her mother, but one incident stood out......

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About 16 years ago, when Simmy was 7 years old, she and her mother, Vinita, had gone on a visit to their Mussoorie Bakery Shop, her mother driving the car. Both mother and daughter together made these visits many times, since her father mostly took care of the Dehradun Bakery. It was always fun for both of them to visit their shop, relish the cakes and other food stuff, do some sightseeing in and around Mussoorie, and then return home to Dehradun, all refreshed and happy. Besides Vinita loved going on long drives with her daughter, and these journeys between Dehradun and Mussoorie, satiated her urge to drive .

Unfortunately, on that particular day, on their way back from Mussoorie to Dehradun, they started the journey very late, as they had spent some extra time on the Mall Road of Mussoorie. And to compound the problems further, just before entering the city limits of Dehradun, their car suddenly broke down. It was late in the night and the particular stretch was very desolate. Vinita parked the car beside the highway and rolled up the windows of the car. She dialled both the Police as well as her husband and both eagerly awaited the arrival of either of them.

 It was well into the winter and was getting very chilly inside the car. Even though Simmy was a small child, she could sense the nervousness of her mother, who was cursing the act of indiscretion that she had just committed. Highways are unsafe for any lady, more so a lady with a girl child and that too, so late in the night. But what  impressed the tender mind of the child Simmy, the most, was the calm face that her mother presented to her, that look of cold determination, in spite of her shakiness. As the cold increased to near about freezing, Vinita took out the sweater that she was wearing and wrapped it around Simmy, preferring to suffer the cold herself.  Then it came the turn of the warm  inner wear inside. Simmy could see the look of fierce protectiveness writ large on her mother's face. She could see that her mother was prepared to even go naked so that every strip of clothing that she wore, could be used to cover the frail body of her child. Mercifully her father reached  them in less than an hours time, driving like crazy. Even this seemed like a lifetime to them. 

She had retained her memories of her mother during that night, for a long time. On that wedding night in Delhi, the warm feeling of reassurance that her mother had evoked in her on the outskirts of Dehradun, came over her in a rush. She also remembered how immensely proud she had been of mother then, for days. Her mother with the looks of a goddess!

Tears freely started flowing down the cheeks of Simmy. After some time there were small sobs too, which she found difficult controlling. She moved out of the Hall and onto a deserted corner outside.  'How could her mother be so bitchy?' she thought sorrowfully ,'How could she desert a child who adored her more than any being on earth, and leave her for someone else? And not miss her in all those years.'

Simmy knew that no one had any answer to all the deep seated problems that she had been  carrying all these years, save one! Her mother Vinita! 

It was now  a foregone conclusion with her, that the method of escapism that she had been adopting in dealing with the situation she was in, was not working at all. She had to get to the roots of the problem. She had to talk with Vinita! She had to see her stutter her words of apologies, beg for forgiveness, hear her offering pitiful reasons for her inexcusably depraved behaviour! 

 And  then forgive her she would, before moving on in life!

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