Altered - A Marvel AU

Chapter 15 - Pain

It wasn't until I held the bloody scalpel that the crushing realization of everything that had happened came down on me. Until then, it was like my body and mind were rejecting the rationale of it all because I was power-hungry and revenge-hungry. I should probably back up.

After Kronos left my room, I knew I couldn't keep the fetus growing within me because it now had his blood and he would kill me once Kronos found out. So I grabbed a scalpel from the infirmary, locked myself in my bathroom, and looked at myself in the mirror. Gently, I drew a straight black line for the incision, I would just yank the kid out.

With shaking hands and a face streaked with tears, I applied pressure on my skin and cut, it burned me and what gushed out from my body wasn't red blood, in fact, it was the same color as my power, black with golden and silver specks in it. I knew Gods had golden blood, Ichor, so what was this?

The unbearable pain made my knees buckle as I slid down onto the cold bathroom floor. I had to act quick, seeing as the wound was already healing. I reached inside, feeling around for a spongy material until I was sure I found what I needed. I quickly yanked and my back involuntarily arched as the pain hit me like a ton of bricks. I lay there, a writhing, crying mess, one hand clamped over my mouth so that my screams were not made audible.

As soon as the pain came, it subsided, my vision turning normal from the screaming red it was before. I gingerly ran a hand over the same place I had cut and found a noticeable scar in its place. I stood up and looked in the mirror, noticing that the skin had healed over, but left behind a nasty mark.

I saw the bloody scalpel on the side of the sink, and I held it up, examining it. I looked at the black blood and it was then that I realized I was a goddess. I slunk to the ground once more, sobbing violently, my chest heaving painfully. How was it possible, for me, for an ordinary woman to be a goddess. I admit, I'm pretty, what most supermodels have through surgery, I have naturally, but that doesn't change the fact that nothing about me is goddess-like. And my mother, Gods, my mother. She knew nothing, she treated me like her own and now she was gone from my life, my brother was gone from my life and so was Steve.

I sobbed uncontrollably, my body was curled in a ball and I rocked to try to keep myself calm. Nothing seemed to work, it was as if all of these problems were rejected by me and once they all came back to me, I felt small, even though, supposedly, I was the most powerful goddess to exist. This couldn't be possible, I looked at my hands, normal hands, I looked at my body, normal, then why could I do these things, why did I have these powers?

I didn't ask to be a goddess, I guess none of them did, that thought gave me some comfort. I was still badly shaken though, due to Kronos's threat, and the crushing realization of losing my family and the one person I truly loved as a romantic partner in the world.

I couldn't even fathom how unbearable this pain really was for me, all I could do about it was give in to my depression and just cry and cry and cry about it. I remembered all the memories I made with Faaz and Steve and my friends and then I thought, why am I here? Kronos definitely treated me nicely first, but soon he became short-tempered with me and now that he's done with me, he tossed me aside. I came looking for love and all I found was destruction and evil.

Is this really me, do I really want to hurt people, am I capable of causing such chaos and destruction as to destroy most of this planet. The scary part was, I wasn't aware of any of these answers. Previously, my mind was on a one-track road, with revenge for Steve leaving me the only thing I could think of, but I shouldn't be so pretty? I was also tired of people using me and then tossing me aside when they were done with me, I had to somehow draw a line, but I didn't know how.

Soon I would figure it out. Soon all of them will be sorry, not because I'll take revenge but because I'll let them know what they missed out on. Soon they'll all come crawling back just to be rejected like they did me. I'm done with this world and I'm certainly done with love. But first, I promised revenge to the Avengers to Kronos and that should be what I do tomorrow.

I glanced to the side where the bloody, spongy part of my body lay. I crawled towards it, picking it up and... wait what? This was definitely not a fetus, it wasn't even close! I... I quickly got up and cleaned myself up. Putting on a robe, I took long, quiet strides towards the infirmary.

There lay an ultrasound machine, I quietly whirred it to life and put the gel on my lower belly. I started to apply pressure with the tool on my belly and saw my uterus on the screen. My normal, child-free uterus. No signs of an abortion or pregnancy showed. But one of my tubes did look like a part had recently been chunked off. I wasn't too worried though, being a goddess, that part would just heal itself.

"Oh my Gods." I whispered, I was never pregnant, I nearly jumped in joy. I quickly put my robe back on and sneaked into my room. That night, I slept peacefully, not knowing what would happen next.